Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

[Falcon Sebben]

I figured it was just taken as fact that this latest stroke legitimately knocked his IQ down 10/20 points. Either that, or the stroke practically gave him a partial lobotomy.

Either way, the guy's a melted shell of his former self. At least he's less of a vocal asshole to others.

Could be purely mental but this could explain some of the physical symptoms as well and his brain just isn't communicating properly with his body.

 

[AltisticRight]

I refuse to believe Jack Scalfani who thinks the government is secretly substituting real meat with more expensive lab-grown meat has any IQ left to spare. If he lost 10 points, he'll be well in the negative.

 

[L Ton Tubbard]

View attachment 5846794

did my own little reimagining of the jack on the go theme with a modern twist

I can't wait for the trap and lo-fi remixes.

 

[LordofCringe7206 Vol. 2]

I figured it was just taken as fact that this latest stroke legitimately knocked his IQ down 10/20 points. Either that, or the stroke practically gave him a partial lobotomy.

Either way, the guy's a melted shell of his former self. At least he's less of a vocal asshole to others.

Could be purely mental but this could explain some of the physical symptoms as well and his brain just isn't communicating properly with his body.

I just watched the stream he did at the beginning of March. I could really see how badly this last stroke has impacted him. He is speaking slower, you can really see how slow he is at thinking. Physically you can see it in his face and eyes.

The 2018 stroke really did a number on him, but this last one seems to have hurt him badly as well. I know we have all been predicting him to die for years now, but he really does seem like he is on borrowed time at this point. At most I predict maybe another three or four years.

 

[Bassomatic]

Jack is so fat his face hurts because it's holding layers of blubber over it. The skin trying to hold on to the odd shaped skull that hosts to jacks pea brain.

A story of random pain like that really adds me to think part o hu quality dropped so fast was he's on painkillers. This pig needs drugs same kind people take for pulling limbs out of sockets, car crashes and invasive surgery just because how far he is.

Jack is single handled keeping TN Medicaid in the profits. I said Medicaid because I bet part of tam hams how to prank the US gov system is they file apart and Jack makes no money so he gets free care. Hey who needs health insurance when there's Arby's to buy? I do know the real reason he goes to doctors he's like a fucking child, Tammy has to reward him with fast food when he leaves the house.

Very patriotic of him.

Thinking of memory care and child always being like a child I think of a family member I had suffered dementia in the end he worked hard to keep what he had and was always healthy and smart. Still it's a battle no one can win. Towards the end little trips like that we're a big deal since he and family cared about his health lot of doctor visits and mental stimulation. Crazy to think Jacks like a lss happy 90 year old.

In regards to cocktails out esp steakhouses you know you're paying for the experience and ease. Since I like making steaks aside work I'm not going to a steak house so I don't much give a fuck I'm paying 22 dollars for a mid tier bourbon shook with ice and dishes of what ever. To be fair the best places here all compete and booze is a big profit for all restaurants so they make their own bitters import Italian vermouths etc.

Jack doesn't drink tho he just is going down the cobra make your own booze arc. Actually I think jacks will be less interesting if not as dangerous. He's a consumer whore so he will buy over priced kits flavors etc. Still will mess it up I'm sure.

We keep saying this is the final arc but via pure spite and the devil himself keeping Jack alive to make the world suffer and spread homosexuality I gotta say how much lower can he sink? Gosh I bet that was probably said 8 years ago.

Will mega church God finally feel pity and try to humble us by giving our laughing stock a proper widow maker (will Tammy really be a widow with Jim Trainor moving in during the time emts cart the body out?) or will Jack just keep slipping mentally and turn into a legit noise making blob that just screams until it's fed.

Jack ending on a toddler with pica arc does seem kinda amusing. But more likely do I see him having another heart attack as he's eating onion rings watching gay porn on his IMAK.

The saddest part is not jr walking in finding his dad dead but he already missed the good part and has to rewind to jerk it and microwave the onion rings

 

[PlasticOwls]

At most I predict maybe another three or four years

I'm hedging my bets towards the end of this year, or by next year if he's stubborn.

Then again, there are some real horrorcows that live decades past their supposed expiration date

 

[LordofCringe7206 Vol. 2]

I'm hedging my bets towards the end of this year, or by next year if he's stubborn.

Then again, there are some real horrorcows that live decades past their supposed expiration date

I expected him to die a couple years ago and he is still going. The human body can be pretty resilient. I've known people that abuse their body like Jack that make it into their seventies.

The fact that he is showing signs though that his body is breaking down tells me he'll be lucky to make it into his sixties. All that matters is just how much his body can handle before it can't run anymore.

 

[Adamska]

He'll just lie and say that the doctor said he was in perfect health.

He'll likely just mention that the doc will say all signs are gud. He might make up a lie about how the doc is happy with his beepee to claim how his carnival diet is totally working, ignore the shurggrrr and bad numbers both ways.

He legit openly lied about this months before one of his strokes. I also know his doc would've assigned him meds to wrangle his systolics down. Most docs would suggest that, but he never mentions taking them.

 

[eatler]

I know we have all been predicting him to die for years now, but he really does seem like he is on borrowed time at this point.

We shall call this segment of his life “edging my stroke“

But in all seriousness I’ll be a little sad if he goes. In the human sense it sucks to see someone else die and in the lolcow sense we would loose our laughing stock. Correct me if I’m wrong but He was one of the few cows that was just a weird cow and not some weird sex pest like most of the new cows are.

 

[Incredible Mister]

We shall call this segment of his life “edging my stroke“

But in all seriousness I’ll be a little sad if he goes. In the human sense it sucks to see someone else die and in the lolcow sense we would loose our laughing stock. Correct me if I’m wrong but He was one of the few cows that was just a weird cow and not some weird sex pest like most of the new cows are.

I wouldn't, at this point, keeping him alive is the cruelest thing you can do. he's lost so much cognition and ability for someone who was always stupid and weak, its morbid to think how far this will go, really.

 

[ZipDisk]

One thing I like about Jack going to the doctor is that it's one time Tammy can not feed off the schadenfreude and instead is as annoyed as anyone else at dealing with Jack.

Like, Jack isn't going to take any medical advice onboard, but at least Tammy is unhappy.

 

[semitooth]

somehow always without fail forget to turn the volume down when I put these on and the intro music always seems 1db louder than last time

 

[clearwire4]

I hope he gets better so he can bless us with more of his beautiful recipes and cooking guides.

 

[eatler]

music always seems 1db louder than last time

I’d imagine his heart thumping is probably affecting his hearing. Like the veins in his ear are constantly hearing marathon running like heart rates out of someone who mostly sits all day.

I also find his way to hint that he’s making a roadhouse video by bitching about peanuts funny, he even mentions in the video that you can still get them and “agrees with the decision to cut costs(?)” (im thinking the servers probably enjoyed not having to clean up shells all the time on the floor).

 

[Doctor of Autism]

I like how Carnivore Jack really cares about the bread at Texas Roadhouse, bitches about the lack of peanuts, and ordered potatoes with his Steak. What a dedicated eater of meats only.

 

[Kuritan Deplorable]

I wouldn't, at this point, keeping him alive is the cruelest thing you can do. he's lost so much cognition and ability for someone who was always stupid and weak, its morbid to think how far this will go, really.

I will never feel bad for a lolcow suffering the explicitly predictable consequences of their actions. If Jack got this way because he was tboned by some drunk driver and fucked him up, I'd feel bad. But all Jack has is a life wasted in the kitchen making slop, that never discovered the concept of portion sizing. Every single thing he has suffered has both not been a surprise, but the active and most commonly known consequence for what he's done.

That's what makes Jack one of my perfect lolcows to follow. There's nothing to feel guilty about watching this, he made this bed and is still defending it even as it kills him.

 

[Dead Air]

I don't feel bad for Jack as the hell he's in is just the consequences of his own actions. This is probably overly optimistic but it will be a boon to his family once he goes. Not having this fat retard laying around forcing you to eat garbage, draining your finances, and taxing you mentally should do them some good. If they aren't too far gone themselves. Either way, it will be entertaining to see what happens to them after his curse is finally lifted off of them.

 

[biggacracka]

If they aren't too far gone themselves

Optimist, i see

 

[PlasticOwls]

I don't feel bad for Jack as the hell he's in is just the consequences of his own actions. This is probably overly optimistic but it will be a boon to his family once he goes. Not having this fat retard laying around forcing you to eat garbage, draining your finances, and taxing you mentally should do them some good. If they aren't too far gone themselves. Either way, it will be entertaining to see what happens to them after his curse is finally lifted off of them.

I'm sure there's a fat life insurance check on top of that

 

[Bassomatic]

I'm sure there's a fat life insurance check on top of that

One thing I gotta say, I love the meme about the life insurance. It just hit me tho. I bet there's none.

While Tammy is pretty good with numbers and accounting, end of the day they are pure white trash. Top it off boomers!

If they have anything Jack probably got ripped off by old murder church members and 90% goes to pastor faggot and his star bucks disco ball house of worship.

They probably looked into it after Jack got sick and couldn't afford it or let lapse when Tammy got laid off.

I fondly predict jacks passing will leave a big debt to his retard clan in all reality. He's definitely the kind of person who would do that.