Keffals / Clara Sorrenti / Lucas John Roberts / Queen Clara the Fart Dominatrix / SorrentiThott - Twitter / Twitch slacktivist. Obsessed with being famous. Operator of the Catboy Ranch. Canadian T-Girl porn star and independent Fart Fetish / Findom Dominatrix. Personally sponsored sending Chinese HRT from Brazil to children without parental consent.

[PlasticOwls]

Keffals did say it wasn't that much water the guinea pig was in, but if it's true the guinea pig was sick and elderly well. It could have panicked in there and got exhausted and either had a heart attack and/or drowned.

On one hand, guinea pigs are absolute high-maintenance retards that'd starve to death if their favorite food isn't directly in front of them.

On the other hand, two inches of water is insane for a guinea pig; that's the guinea pig equivalent of a human swimming pool for a creature that doesn't swim. Or use water to clean themselves.

Of all the pets for a depressed person to take care of, guinea pigs are the worst ones. Abandoning it at a PetSmart would have been a mercy compared to being stuck with Keffals.

 

[Maori Kiwifruit Growers]

Lucas inspired me to write this haiku (from his point of view):

The deplatforming
Can never hide the anguish
I miss my penis

 

[Wuhan Wet Market]

You are legitimizing his mental illness by calling him a she.

Alternatively, you can let people call Keffals whatever they want to. We are all here for the same purpose: to laugh at this person. You should calm down and stop shitting the thread up before we laugh at you too.

 

[Tetragrammaton]

On one hand, guinea pigs are absolute high-maintenance retards that'd starve to death if their favorite food isn't directly in front of them.

On the other hand, two inches of water is insane for a guinea pig; that's the guinea pig equivalent of a human swimming pool for a creature that doesn't swim. Or use water to clean themselves.

Of all the pets for a depressed person to take care of, guinea pigs are the worst ones. Abandoning it at a PetSmart would have been a mercy compared to being stuck with Keffals.

the fact that he just left it in the sink or wherever it was being washed is what gets me. like washing it was stupid to begin with but then you go the extra mile and leave the possibly sick and old animal alone when it is most likely very scared and stressed out.

prey animals like guinea pigs and hamsters and what not are very sensitive creatures and you can kill them on accident if you stress them out too much.

i have heard stories of peoples hamsters dying just because they got a cat and the hamsters smelled the cat and were just constantly in panic mode even though the cat never got near them at all.

at the end of the day i think the best pet for lucas would be a rock at least then he cant kill it on accident or on purpose he still might try to fuck it though.

 

[PlasticOwls]

prey animals like guinea pigs and hamsters and what not are very sensitive creatures and you can kill them on accident if you stress them out too much.

at the end of the day i think the best pet for lucas would be a rock at least then he cant kill it on accident or on purpose he still might try to fuck it though

What's frustrating is that Lucas doesn't strike me as someone who particularly likes animals anyway, or has any specific reason to own a guinea pig over, like, a cat.

Lucas probably just strolled around PetSmart, saw guinea pigs on sale, and bought one without doing any research, or thinking his decision through. A quick google search would tell you guinea pigs are goddamned expensive to take care of.

And knowing Steven Universe is a thing, I wouldn't be shocked if Lucas did find a way to drill a hole into a rock to fuck it

 

[Questionable Ceviche]

at the end of the day i think the best pet for lucas would be a rock at least then he cant kill it on accident or on purpose he still might try to fuck it though.

To be honest, I think a lot of post-op trans-identified men like Lucas aren't fucking anything, at least not in a sexual way. The hypersexual public behavior seems like a paraphilia in and of itself. They're a group of people engaging in stereotyped sexual performances with no functional genitalia, no physical sensation, and no ability to orgasm. They're going through all the motions of an act they can no longer physically experience. It's weird and uncomfortable, and it took me a long time to really figure out what exactly was so uncanny about the entire thing.

Why the fuck would a feminized, mutilated eunich like Lucas want to run a Catboy Ranch to groom a bunch of boys when he can't even jerk off? He's involved in sexual spaces for other reasons - power, control, desire to corrupt, desire to harm, attention-seeking, exhibitionism, or some combination of the above. All of the rape accusations trannies make against each other, a population who willingly undergo ritualized genital mutilation, make sense when viewed from that lens.

 

[PlasticOwls]

To be honest, I think a lot of post-op trans-identified men like Lucas aren't fucking anything, at least not in a sexual way. The hypersexual public behavior seems like a paraphilia in and of itself. They're a group of people engaging in stereotyped sexual performances with no functional genitalia, no physical sensation, and no ability to orgasm. They're going through all the motions of an act they can no longer physically experience. It's weird and uncomfortable, and it took me a long time to really figure out what exactly was so uncanny about the entire thing.

Why the fuck would a feminized, mutilated eunich like Lucas want to run a Catboy Ranch to groom a bunch of boys when he can't even jerk off? He's involved in sexual spaces for other reasons - power, control, desire to corrupt, desire to harm, attention-seeking, exhibitionism, or some combination of the above. All of the rape accusations trannies make against each other, a population who willingly undergo ritualized genital mutilation, make sense when viewed from that lens.

I'm not privy to exactly how Lucas did the deed with his junk, but a study published two years ago by NYU Langone Health reports that their new fancy robotic vaginoplasty lets post-op trannies experience orgasms after a year of recovery

link to the article

Which, I'm sure, pisses off Lucas for not waiting until technology improved to get his bits altered.

That said, if Lucas did lose all ability to sexually orgasm, you'd think he wouldn't be a hypersexual nuisance to everyone. I do think you're right on the money that it's a ploy to seize authority and attention, while potentially getting impressionable boys to suffer the same fate he suffers everyday.

Misery loves company, after all

 

[Tetragrammaton]

What's frustrating is that Lucas doesn't strike me as someone who particularly likes animals anyway, or has any specific reason to own a guinea pig over, like, a cat.

this is true. i think he likes the idea of having a pet but not the actual responsibility related to having a pet. he is like those people who impulse buy pythons without realizing they grow bigger than what you see at the pet store and end up dumping it outside. its cool to brag about being a snake owner but caring for the snake would be far too much for him.

thankfully i do not believe he owns any of the cats he is living with as they are all being cared for by ENFO. who seems to do a good job at caring for them.

 

[Dong-Liquor]

*deep breath*
YOU LOST LUCAS ROBERTS, YOU FAILED LUCAS ROBERTS, YOU'RE DUMB LUCASROBERTS, YOU'RE THE DUMBEST LITIGANT EVER LUCAS ROBERTS, YOU'RE A FAILURE LUCAS ROBERTS

You were sent from planet Troonshine to conquer the Earth
You had a terrific plan
You thought it would work
Tried to get the earthlings all to change their gender
You see
But it all went wrong and now I must decree

You are worthless, Lucas Roberts
You are worthless, Lucas Roberts
You failed in every way and now my stock in you has fallen.
Your career is stalling and you're worthless, Lucas Roberts
That's why you'll blow your head off
And your catboys are all bawling

Planet Troonshine is inhabited with Transgoons like you
But also with Skinfolds who smell like a moldy shoe
The Transgoons and the Skinfolds are at constant war
So you wanted a new home and that's what Earth was for

But you are worthless, Lucas Roberts
You are worthless, Lucas Roberts
You fucked up your whole plan
And now Troonshine is covered with hanging perverts
Your garbage needs some hauling
And you're worthless, Lucas Roberts
Now you must return home a failure
I'm afraid the pit of Cry Rock is calling


(not the best parody, but it took less than 20 minutes from thinking of it to posting it)
-edit to move the comment from the middle of the fucking post

 

[AnOminous]

Guinea pigs were my first furry pets… this sucks, they are cute little animal.

I feel you my nigga. I had a guinea pig when I was a little bitty itty nominomus. I cried like a bitch when that little fucker died.

 

[Something Awful]

I like how Lucas did not even bother trying to deny that he let the guinea pigs live in filth, just blathered something about muh depression and being a "disabled woman", which I guess means it's okay for him to get pets and not care for them.

Speaking of which, here's something else that pisses me off. I mentioned Maeve before, a heckin' valid Canadian transbian who allegedly saved Lucas's life by telling him to go to rehab instead of 41%'ing.

A week ago Maeve made a Ko-fi to beg for money in the Catboy Ranch and on Twitter.



Apparently just saying "give me money" did not attract enough attention, so a few days later he updated it with this:



Why does this piss me off? Because Maeve is currently on a holiday in Northern Ireland. He went there to celebrate Lucas's birthday, because Lucas doesn't have any local friends aside from EFNO. Instead of setting aside money for his cat's medical bills, he got a plane ticket from Canada to the UK to have some stink ditch party with Lucas and EFNO. And apparently Lucas can't share any of his griftbux either to save his very good friend's cat, because he's too busy spending thousands on drugs in darknet markets once again.

I hate these fucking people, and I hate their fucking grift economy where they can't even take care of their pets without begging on the Internet.

 

[Local Farmer]

You were sent from planet Troonshine to conquer the Earth
You had a terrific plan
You thought it would work
Tried to get the earthlings all to change their gender
You see
But it all went wrong and now I must decree

You are worthless, Lucas Roberts
You are worthless, Lucas Roberts
You failed in every way and now my stock in you has fallen.
Your career is stalling and you're worthless, Lucas Roberts
That's why you'll blow your head off
And your catboys are all bawling

Planet Troonshine is inhabited with Transgoons like you
But also with Skinfolds who smell like a moldy shoe
The Transgoons and the Skinfolds are at constant war
So you wanted a new home and that's what Earth was for

But you are worthless, Lucas Roberts
You are worthless, Lucas Roberts
You fucked up your whole plan
And now Troonshine is covered with hanging perverts
Your garbage needs some hauling
And you're worthless, Lucas Roberts
Now you must return home a failure
I'm afraid the pit of Cry Rock is calling


(not the best parody, but it took less than 20 minutes from thinking of it to posting it)
-edit to move the comment from the middle of the fucking post

You will never be a real streamer. You have no friends, you have no simps, you have no donos. You are a homosexual man twisted by heroine and surgery into a crude mockery of nature’s perfection (tipster)
All the “validation” you get is two-faced and half-hearted. Behind your back people mock you. Your father is disgusted and ashamed of you, your “friends” laugh at your ghoulish appearance from beyond the grave.
Even the most utterly contorted troons are utterly repulsed by you. Thousands of years of retardwar have allowed men to sniff out frauds with incredible efficiency. Even your streams that do “well” will fail miserably to a 2 hour long stream of Just Josh saying the n-word. Your bpd rants to your groomed victims is a dead giveaway. And even if you manage to get a casual viewer, he’ll turn tail and bolt the second he gets a whiff of your dumb fucking heroine fueled retardation.
You will never be happy. You wrench out all the energy you have to act sober, every single morning and tell yourself it’s going to be ok, but deep inside you feel the depression creeping up like a weed, ready to crush you under the unbearable weight.
Eventually it’ll be too much to bear – you’ll buy more heroine, strap your arm, tap that needle and plunge into the cold abyss. Your hamster will find you, heartbroken but relieved that they no longer have to live with the unbearable shame and disappointment. They’ll bury you with a headstone marked with your birth name, and every passerby for the rest of eternity will know a man is buried there. Your channel will decay and no one will care to archive it anymore, and all that will remain of your legacy is a skeleton that is unmistakably male.
This is your fate. This is what you chose. There is no turning back.

I like how Lucas did not even bother trying to deny that he let the guinea pigs live in filth, just blathered something about muh depression and being a "disabled woman", which I guess means it's okay for him to get pets and not care for them.

Speaking of which, here's something else that pisses me off. I mentioned Maeve before, a heckin' valid Canadian transbian who allegedly saved Lucas's life by telling him to go to rehab instead of 41%'ing.

A week ago Maeve made a Ko-fi to beg for money in the Catboy Ranch and on Twitter.

View attachment 5856490

Apparently just saying "give me money" did not attract enough attention, so a few days later he updated it with this:

View attachment 5856485

Why does this piss me off? Because Maeve is currently on a holiday in Northern Ireland. He went there to celebrate Lucas's birthday, because Lucas doesn't have any local friends aside from EFNO. Instead of setting aside money for his cat's medical bills, he got a plane ticket from Canada to the UK to have some stink ditch party with Lucas and EFNO. And apparently Lucas can't share any of his griftbux either to save his very good friend's cat, because he's too busy spending thousands on drugs in darknet markets once again.

I hate these fucking people, and I hate their fucking grift economy where they can't even take care of their pets without begging on the Internet.

Oh so when I tell people to give me money or I’ll kill my pet I’m called “insane” or “evil” but when a troon does it it’s “empowering” and “brave”

 

[Mr. Manchester]

Instead of setting aside money for his cat's medical bills, he got a plane ticket from Canada to the UK to have some stink ditch party with Lucas and EFNO.

Troons begging and making shit up so that lesser troons give them welfare money is nothing new but I bet a plane ticket to see Lucas was non-negotiable. Lucas is DEPRESSED and STRUGGLING. How dare one of his friends cancel a pity party just because a smelly old cat is sick, which is obviously not his fucking problem. Why if someone, especially a lesser troon like Maeve, canceled a fun trip to see Lucas sit zonked out on drugs than they are definitely going to be responsible if any 41% related incidents happen.

I just imagine Lucas yelling in his shitty asshole voice, "Oh my god! Start a fucking Ko-Fi! No! Post the cat or they won't donate what the fuck?!?"

May all troons have the opportunity to become 'friends' with Lucas someday.

 

[Well Intentioned]

Personally, I think Lucas' whole story is bunk and his guinea pig either died of natural causes or from neglect because he's an empty-headed drug addict. The whole song and dance is just done to distance himself from blame and generate sympathy.

 

[Bec Noir]

I can't decide if this is more or less creepy than skinwalking as a childhood acquaintance.

As someone who has a childhood acquaintance skinwalking as him, I think skinwalking as your own mother is definitely even creepier.

While I understand it's part of the game on YouTube to respect tranny pronouns or get your channel nuked it's still quite jarring hearing someone call Lucas a "she". It's a good video, easy enough to follow and digest so I give the tranny pronouns a pass.

They changed that rule last year. Maybe it fucks the algorithm so you get few views and it demonetizes the video, but any YouTuber still using tranny pronouns is either a retard, a pussy, and/or a sellout. For proof that it's not bannable anymore, see Matt Walsh.

Some people accidentally turn their dryer on with a cat in it cause they do t know it got in their
I am not betting for Lucas but their are accidents. In the grand scheme of things Lucas has soooo many other problems to deal with.

Always check your appliances for your cat before you turn them on, and don't get a pet if you're an irresponsible, retarded faggot.

Personally, I think Lucas' whole story is bunk and his guinea pig either died of natural causes or from neglect because he's an empty-headed drug addict. The whole song and dance is just done to distance himself from blame and generate sympathy.

His ex boyfriend was using that as an accusation against him, so I don't see why the ex would make up a story for Lucas's benefit. Fuck his own dog? Possibly. Drown his own guinea pig? Undoubtedly.

 

[Something Awful]

His ex boyfriend was using that as an accusation against him, so I don't see why the ex would make up a story for Lucas's benefit. Fuck his own dog? Possibly.

Speaking of dogs, the featured post about Bad Dragon made me realize something. I was vaguely aware of Bad Dragon, but I thought it was just for people who liked weird dildos for some reason; in my naivete I did not realize it was for animal fuckers. Of course, now I went to check out their website and saw a fleshlight modeled after a cat anus. Yeah.

Anyway, it made me remember Lucas is a fan.



It seems the experience with Daisy did not dissuade him from further adventures in bestiality after all. I guess you can say fucking yourself in the ass with a dog dick dildo is progress compared to trying to fuck a chihuahua, by tranny standards.

 

[PointOfNoReturnPoint]

Speaking of dogs, the featured post about Bad Dragon made me realize something. I was vaguely aware of Bad Dragon, but I thought it was just for people who liked weird dildos for some reason; in my naivete I did not realize it was for animal fuckers. Of course, now I went to check out their website and saw a fleshlight modeled after a cat anus. Yeah.

Anyway, it made me remember Lucas is a fan.

View attachment 5856726

It seems the experience with Daisy did not dissuade him from further adventures in bestiality after all. I guess you can say fucking yourself in the ass with a dog dick dildo is progress compared to trying to fuck a chihuahua, by tranny standards.

The whole thing here made me pause. He fucks a dog, takes his dick off, buys a cat asshole fleshlight to fuck with removed penis that he needs but can't get back...


Nigga what is 2024

 

[Stupid Sexy Flanders]

Why would a true and honest woman like Clara stick things up her ass instead of in her vagina?

 

[Questionable Ceviche]

I hate these fucking people, and I hate their fucking grift economy where they can't even take care of their pets without begging on the Internet.

Having pets is part of their grift economy. Think about how many bums have dogs tied up next to them while they panhandle. These animals are impulse acquisitions at best and deliberate grift accessory at worst. When normal e-begging doesn't work, they can pull out the sad animal photos and say the money is for their poor cat while they're on vacation in another country.

 

[Fishmalk Observer]

Having pets is part of their grift economy. Think about how many bums have dogs tied up next to them while they panhandle. These animals are impulse acquisitions at best and deliberate grift accessory at worst. When normal e-begging doesn't work, they can pull out the sad animal photos and say the money is for their poor cat while they're on vacation in another country.

I dunno having a dog as a bum makes much more sense, they provide companionship, help guard against thieves etc. For some it's a grift accessory, but i sadly know a few bums who treat their dogs much better than they treat themselves.