Anna o' Brien / Glitter + Lazers / GlitterandLazers - Fat, drunk, consoomer attention whore who would rather eat and drink herself to death than endure a single negative emotion

[thejackal2]

Serious 2nd hand embarrassment for her in the last clip. She's just so fucking awkward and stunted and a constant spectacle with her body.

 

[Jizzrag]

Serious 2nd hand embarrassment for her in the last clip

Holy fucking shit


Go ahead Anna, try them on

 

[brooky]

Holy fucking shit
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Go ahead Anna, try them on
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Are those little shorts or mini skirts or something? Can't even tell when she's holding them. Does she think they're neckerchiefs or something?

 

[GenociderSyo]

That shop only carries S, M & L.

 

[WalmartLipgloss]

Here is the footage of Anna getting back on the boat.
Mortifying.

 

[GenociderSyo]

 

[pink cigarettes]

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Once you've eaten yourself into "mobility issues," you need to invest all that money in long term inpatient help followed by an outpatient program. Candidly.

 

[bliblblblbbllb]

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"Captain, I need you to tie a rope to haul me out!" Wtflol. Why exactly can't she use the handlebars on the ladder? Is she so wide that her arms can't reach it over her gut?

 

[OttoWest]

"Captain, I need you to tie a rope to haul me out!" Wtflol. Why exactly can't she use the handlebars on the ladder? Is she so wide that her arms can't reach it over her gut?

It’s insane, isn’t it?

It appears that the ladder is too narrow for Anna’s stance (for lack of a better word.) She’s not able to step both feet on a rung at the same time and cannot lift her knees high enough and stay balanced to have each foot on a different rung without the pull of the rope hoisting her forward. The sheer bulk of her lower body makes it near impossible.

You see her almost lose her balance at the :06-:07 mark and when she finally gets high enough, she can’t step over the top bar as the other girl did, but just falls forward, her knee just making it past the bar.

ETA She admits the other girls had to hoist her out the first time:

 

[xogossipgorl]

"Captain, I need you to tie a rope to haul me out!" Wtflol. Why exactly can't she use the handlebars on the ladder? Is she so wide that her arms can't reach it over her gut?

I watched this so many times to try to figure that out, and that must be it. Not the fact that she was afraid the ladder wouldn't hold her, but that she wasn't able to get her arms close enough to it? Or I just don't understand physics enough and it's a leverage issue.
Her arms were really stretched out holding onto that rope and she looked like a monster. I feel so much second hand shame even minutes after watching.

Seriously, how embarrassing.

Edit: @OttoWest that makes sense-- her massive leg spread. This video really befuddled me-- even watched in slowmo to try to figure it out.

 

[xivnuhranx]

I watched this so many times to try to figure that out, and that must be it. Not the fact that she was afraid the ladder wouldn't hold her, but that she wasn't able to get her arms close enough to it? Or I just don't understand physics enough and it's a leverage issue.
Her arms were really stretched out holding onto that rope and she looked like a monster. I feel so much second hand shame even minutes after watching.

Seriously, how embarrassing.

If you watch the thin woman, you'll notice how she bends over as she's getting up the ladder and then propels her upper body upright once she reaches the top.

Anna cannot bend like that, her gunt is too massive. The rope is to pull her up to the top, then she falls forward onto the deck and has to crawl out.

 

[I call shenanigans]

If that’s what it took to get her back on the deck, I really want to see how she got of the rope hammock thing she showed herself on.

 

[DefCon Dumb]

That 13 second clip brings to mind one of the last scenes in ‘Jaws’, where the shark chomps his way up the stern deck.

Anna says: “Small caveat: it takes some practice to do and get, (sic), easier over time as you build muscle memory.”

I has questions…

Did you as you stated, figure this method out or was it brain stormed by boat crew?

You mention it takes some practice to figure out. So… did your practice consist of any number of failed attempts before finally slamming up on to the stern deck?

Muscle memory generally takes a lot of repeated motions over eeeks at minimum so what is this bullshit you spew?

Honestly I have to wonder how much effort had to be made to accommodate Anna’s ‘special’ needs? This might be a vacation boat but the crews, no matter what bs Life Below Decks shows, have serious responsibilities when it comes to the safe operation of their ship and the well being of passengers.

Having to figure out accommodations for someone like Anna isn’t in my view, worth the bother if you’re hoping to increase your bookings. You might keep the land whale happy but is it worth the neg rates the other passengers might give you?

I feel for those other passengers, awkwardly stuck with a braying attention whore who expects copious praise for getting up a ladder, a rock or other small obstacles lighter people don’t have to even think about.

Those other passengers might have had their trip comped in return for positive mentions on their social media but as envious as I am of such a trip, good on them for being considered to have a big enough reach to be offered this fun few days.

And I empathize with what they had to put up with.

 

[pink cigarettes]

"Captain, I need you to tie a rope to haul me out!" Wtflol. Why exactly can't she use the handlebars on the ladder? Is she so wide that her arms can't reach it over her gut?

source: grew up on swim team and swam constantly, watched fatties and grandmas try to haul them self out of pool during "adult swim"
Even if a ladder like that is wide enough, and even if she could reach the handles, boat and swimming pool ladders are always difficult for deathfats. Especially women fats, who tend to have less upper body strength and more weight distributed below the waist. The simplest way to explain it is to imagine them trying to climb a ladder that is tilted slightly backwards, then they have to get over the top. At some point you can't rely on just using your legs, you really have to use upper body strength to heave your whole body over.

 

[xivnuhranx]

With her climbing that rock like King Kong and her climbing out of the water with a rope, my cursed prediction is that her next fitness journey will be rock climbing. That might just finally do her in and make her bedbound.

I think Austin has a lot of rock climbing gyms, or at least the people I knew from there were into rock climbing and bouldering.

 

[Jizzrag]

Candidly,

Oh no, I was hoping she was past that word. She used candidly constantly a year or two ago. Nooo

 

[Flourishing Pinecone ❧]

my cursed prediction is that her next fitness journey will be rock climbing.

I'm sorry but where on earth would you find a hardness harness to fit her girth?!

edit because I can't type

 

[Slippery_Slope]

I am flabbergasted how she is not deeply mortified by this. I am mortified just by watching this.

She is a complete safety hazard on a boat. She should not be on a boat ever. I like being on boats but boats can already be tricky if you are normal size, never mind the size of a hippo.

 

[The Queen of Autists]

I'm sorry but where on earth would you find a hardness to fit her girth?!

Freudian slip much?

 

[Point and Laugh]

Boat ladders are very short and the rungs are really close together. Basically, (assuming it’s like every boat ladder I’ve ever used - which is a lot) your legs are almost at a 75 degree angle to your body on the first rung because it only goes a couple below the waterline. So you have to be able lift your leg quite a bit just to use the bottom rung, then use both your arms and legs to pull yourself out of the water. From there I usually don’t even use the other rungs unless it’s really choppy. I’m kinda shocked it held her tbh. Usually they aren’t made to hold that much weight because most humans don’t weigh near that amount.

tl;dr She can’t lift her leg enough to even get to the first rung and pull herself up from there.

I’ve never in my life seen anyone use a rope. Not even my grandfather who was out on the lake until he was in his 90’s.