Patrick Sean Tomlinson / @stealthygeek / "Torque Wheeler" / @RealAutomanic / Kempesh / Padawan v2.5 - "Conservative" sci-fi author with TDS, armed "drunk with anger management issues" and terminated parental rights, actual tough guy, obese, paid Quasi, paid thousands to be repeatedly unbanned from Twitter

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Let me guess, "Maximums Tiberius" here is supposed to be a stand-in for "Actual Tough Guy" fatrick here, right?
I wonder if he has Nikki call his penis just that, for the brief moment when the pack of negroes aren't in the room yet anyways.
I swear I've read a version of that joke by a second, better author, but can't recall exactly which one. Pratchett or Adams maybe.

This fat american faggot trying to write in their style and it's painful shit.
 
And the loads negros pump into Nikis vagina. Now that's hard work. Takes a real man to fuck Niki.
Perhaps those were the loads in his mustang?

I wonder if he now insists Niki queefs out the farty spunk before she gets in the Rustang, or are the seats so destroyed he has given up?

I swear I've read a version of that joke by a second, better author, but can't recall exactly which one. Pratchett or Adams maybe.

This fat american faggot trying to write in their style and it's painful shit.

With due respect to talented Americans, there are several kinds of British humor that yanks just can’t do.

There is not an American Monty python. Undoable. Sorry, but that must be why Gilliam had to leave the US.

Red Dwarf, American remake attempts are just embarrassing.

There was even an attempt to do Peep Show with Johnny Galecki, and if he couldn’t do Mark, then no one can.

I am glad to my knowledge no one has tried to emulate Rik Mayall, Adrian Edminson, Ben Elton or Sasha Baron Cohen.
Even Rab C Nesbitt couldn’t be done.

A rare exception was Shameless, but that was mostly cause they made it their own, they didn’t just try to emulate the hopelessness and crapness of Manchester.
They made a show clearly about Chicago.

Anyway! If vastly more talented people than Fatrick try and fail, it’s just another testament to his retarded arrogance that he thinks he can capture the deadpan Englishness which eludes him.
 
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Perhaps those were the loads in his mustang?

I wonder if he now insists Niki queefs out the farty spunk before she gets in the Rustang, or are the seats so destroyed he has given up?
Fat's immense girth has pounded the seats into pulp at this point. Nikis queefs only seal the deal. That poor Rustang wishes it could die.
 
Remember when a certain other rotund autist felt the need to declare directly to his trolls that he still shits himself with absolutely fucking zero prompting?

Oversharing about himself and (far more morally damning) his supposed loved ones is one of many factors that certify him as a cow atop of being a pig.
My favorite Tomlinson admission was from when he was arguing with a troll a few months ago and admitted to everyone that he doesn't wear underwear.
 
Let me guess, "Maximums Tiberius" here is supposed to be a stand-in for "Actual Tough Guy" fatrick here, right?
I wonder if he has Nikki call his penis just that, for the brief moment when the pack of negroes aren't in the room yet anyways.
Patrick was trying to write a meathead overconfident jerk like Zapp Brannigan from Futurama. Through his incompetent prose he painted a picture of a strong, capable leader who is one of the few likable characters in Gate Crashers. Oopsie doodles child.

It's like his parody Fonald Plumpf in Starship Repo - an animatronic Trump statue that selflessly sacrifices himself to save the main characters. Another good and decent character despite Patrick's efforts.
 
It's like his parody Fonald Plumpf in Starship Repo - an animatronic Trump statue that selflessly sacrifices himself to save the main characters. Another good and decent character despite Patrick's efforts.
Hold on, not only has this fatty wrote in a literal drumpf caricature into one of his toilet paper rolls he calls a "novel" but he also made him a good guy by accident? LMFAO
Fatty can't even hate the orange man right.
 
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For sure, Rick. You're a very special boy with fifty-five thousand very real followers who definitely care about your shit. (Not sure how one loses minus ten followers though)

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That, works? How, commas work? Durrrrrrrrr.
Not how removing bots works, they do it it batches. He's also lost 22 or so people in the past two weeks but managed to get more followers than that to even out at 20 gained. In other words Patrick is lying to make himself feel better like usual.

That "food" looks nasty. He really will eat anything that's put in front of him.
When and where was Fatrick using Susan to haul topsoil? He has an absolute postage stamp of a yard.
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Safe to say that the estimated value of his Mustang is even lower than we original thought.
Fat fuck is still going....holy hell is this why he seems to have nearly dried up on xitter?!
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I mean I aint complaining....fat NOCHILDING strangers for vaguely disagreeing with him is atleast as funny as him promising prison to trolls
Admitting to having no life outside social media is a rather pathetic flex but alright there Patrick.
 
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Look how far his mouth keeps going after you remove his lips. It's mad fucking creepy. Gulperfish faggot.
Now there's a face in need of a Glasgow smile.
I love reposting these.
Looks like Otho from Beetlejuice, except more insufferable and Shadix was deliberately acting insufferable. More gay, too, even though Shadix was literally gay.
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There is not an American Monty python. Undoable.
It's the rick and morty copypasta but unironically. British humor (especially Python) requires a common education in the classics (man), which Americans don't have.

The Philosopher's Drinking Song doesn't hit if you don't know what a philosopher is.
 
I spontaneously started wondering at what point this thread truly clicked into being the fixture it has become, and I think that while for many it was the Fat Faggot (with bitch tits) call, for me it was learning he had an unironic Gigachad cousin by the name of SGT JAKE RAVEN who is not only a decorated sniper who has partaken in international sniper contests with foreign special forces, but is also a loving and happy father....and on top of this is the most uncanny fucking doppelganger of fat you could imagine
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Honestly it gives me hope that Annabelle might be able to escape the fatrick genetic curse and leave her failure of a biological farmer wailing and snarling in the dust behind her in whatever direction she goes in life.
 
I spontaneously started wondering at what point this thread truly clicked into being the fixture it has become, and I think that while for many it was the Fat Faggot (with bitch tits) call, for me it was learning he had an unironic Gigachad cousin by the name of SGT JAKE RAVEN who is not only a decorated sniper who has partaken in international sniper contests with foreign special forces, but is also a loving and happy father....and on top of this is the most uncanny fucking doppelganger of fat you could imagine
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Honestly it gives me hope that Annabelle might be able to escape the fatrick genetic curse and leave her failure of a biological farmer wailing and snarling in the dust behind her in whatever direction she goes in life.
Holy hell, it's like fatrick from dimension X where he didn't completely fuck up his life, lost weight and became an actual Navy Seal instead of just posting the pasta for the millionth time
If this isn't a blackpill for fatty, I don't know what is. This is like God himself mocking you.
 
SGT JAKE RAVEN who is not only a decorated sniper who has partaken in international sniper contests with foreign special forces, but is also a loving and happy father....and on top of this is the most uncanny fucking doppelganger of fat you could imagine
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This is probably why Fatrick is banned from Robinson gatherings. He probably hates that this isn't him, and they have a similar veteran military man and Patrick probably did his spaghetti factory OH IT'S THIS FUCKIN GUY act and probably tried to argue about the middle east and drumpf. "How can you take orders while under the commander in queef Cheeto Hitler??"

Bonus points if he got drunk enough to swing and got the receiving end of a takedown and pin, squealing like an actual hog.
 
I spontaneously started wondering at what point this thread truly clicked into being the fixture it has become, and I think that while for many it was the Fat Faggot (with bitch tits) call, for me it was learning he had an unironic Gigachad cousin by the name of SGT JAKE RAVEN who is not only a decorated sniper who has partaken in international sniper contests with foreign special forces, but is also a loving and happy father....and on top of this is the most uncanny fucking doppelganger of fat you could imagine
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Honestly it gives me hope that Annabelle might be able to escape the fatrick genetic curse and leave her failure of a biological farmer wailing and snarling in the dust behind her in whatever direction she goes in life.
No different than Shane and Jackie. Their siblings look way better than them.
I don't have much home for Annabelle, she already looks like her father with her mothers hair.
Holy hell, it's like fatrick from dimension X where he didn't completely fuck up his life, lost weight and became an actual Navy Seal instead of just posting the pasta for the millionth time
If this isn't a blackpill for fatty, I don't know what is. This is like God himself mocking you.
He didn't finish his deck though.
 
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