Official Kiwifarms Edgy Atheist Thread - where we make fun of all sorts of sky daddy believers

which ones are the worst?

  • christards

  • muzzies

  • foreskin munchers

  • pagans

  • cow worshippers

  • self-hating atheists ("I rEsPeCt ReLiGiOuS pEoPlE")

  • other

Results are only viewable after voting.
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:story:
 
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Hardline Traditionalist said:
Jesus(PBUH) was a great man, but you cannot find salvation by putting your trust in a man! Instead you should read the Quran and turn to Allah's grace and mercy.
☝️Alhamdulillah!☝️
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This may be a joke to you, but it's actually very serious business and it's happening as we speak.

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"Worship Allah!"
"No accept Jesus!"
"No no no you're not supposed to worship Jesus he's just a PROPHET (pbuh) there's a DIFFERENCE!"
"YOU WILL KNEEL BEFORE JESUS ONE DAY REEEEEEEEE!!!"
"Nuh uh, YOU BETTER BE READY FOR THAT DAYYY!!!"
 
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Our mentally handicapped friends at Gab are having a normal one.

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I'll summarize:

Evil atheist professor: Was everything created by god?
Random student: Yes.
Evil atheist professor: Then god created evil, so he's evil too. *smirks*

Random student is stunned into silence. Evil professor brags about how he just proved god is a myth. (wait, what?)

Based Christian student: Can I ask you a question professor? (you know this implies some really bad cringe is coming)
Evil professor: Sure go ahead.
Based student: Does cold exist?
Evil professor: yeah?
Based student: Nope it's the absence of heat. Does darkness exist?
Evil professor: uh, yeah?
Based student: Nope it's the absence of light. Does evil exist?
Evil professor: ...
Based student: Nope it's the absence of god. So god didn't create evil.

*cue dramatic music*

Everyone stood up and clapped.
 
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Was I the only fedora tipper who was annoyed when the Pope said that genderqueer nonsense was haram? Every time something like this happens the overlap between atheism and supporters of tranny freakdom gets closer and closer to 100%.
 
Bonus from Gab:

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Normal person tweets something out.

White race savior man: "No. Fake. Bullshit. You're SAD and LONELY. WHY AREN'T YOU HAVING KIDS?1? Those fucking JEWS!!!"

*takes screenshots seconds after hitting reply, and posts on gab*

"Guys, guys, see how I totally OWNED this bitch? lmao! Follow me on telegram btw".

Sayer of the N-Word said:
Was I the only fedora tipper who was annoyed when the Pope said that genderqueer nonsense was haram? Every time something like this happens the overlap between atheism and supporters of tranny freakdom gets closer and closer to 100%.
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The majority of religious people see that stuff as haram anyway. There's not much point expecting anything different, even if woke churches are a thing.
 
The Deep State said:
Our mentally handicapped friends at Gab are having a normal one.
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To be as fair as I possibly can, Gab is the bottom of the barrel in terms of intellect. Even the buck-broken bugpeople of ResetEra are smarter.
I dimly remember Gab's owner crying about Donald Trump abandoning the site for a less retarded social media platform.
 
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I probably hate vocal atheists the most.
Like it's fine if you don't believe in the Tooth Fairy, that's probably the most logical position, but no one wants to hear about it. Just plunge into the void.
Or better yet, go read about Roko's Basilisk. It's the most plausible way that an actual god could (will) be created
 
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MDWU said:
Or better yet, go read about Roko's Basilisk. It's the most plausible way that an actual god could (will) be created
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Roko's Basilisk is the most laughably retarded thought experiment ever created. Fart-huffing pseud AI fetishists reinvented Pascal's Wager and thought they fell upon some kind of Lovecraftian truth.
 
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I find the Christian defense on this forum to be stupid. I know it's coming from the political refugees, but I call bullshit on anyone who actively posts online, especially on a forum like this, trying to act like they're spiritual and in connection with a higher moral power.

Christians in real life can be nice, but a lot of them are incredibly sheltered and ignorant. Not in the "flying spaghetti monster" way, but more how they view society and how humans work and think. Also, some of the shit I've heard from them in regards to the afterlife and how that all works is batshit crazy.

I'm forgetting the name of the guy, but one story that I remembered from the Bible for being hilarious was one of God's prophets went through a villager, and all the villagers started making fun of him for being bald, and so God summoned bears to maul them all to death. Imagine some dude saying "If you call me a balding manlet one more time, Yahweh will rain down his wrath down upon ye".
 
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Odd Opossum said:
I'm forgetting the name of the guy, but one story that I remembered from the Bible for being hilarious was one of God's prophets went through a villager, and all the villagers started making fun of him for being bald, and so God summoned bears to maul them all to death. Imagine some dude saying "If you call me a balding manlet one more time, Yahweh will rain down his wrath down upon ye".
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In Leviticus, the hebrews are also prohibited from eating shellfish. Though this was probably due to the hygiene standards of the time.
I'm convinced a lot of early biblical commandments are actually just life advice disguised as divine mandate.
 
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