Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

[Tiresome]

This description reminds me so much of Semi Homemade with Sandra Lee. You guys should look it up if you want a professionally produced show to snark on with the same premise as Jack.

Andrew Cuomo's drunk-ass girlfriend who made horseshit like the Kwanzaa cake? Classic Food Network gold.

 

[draculapenis]

as dumb as this dude is his intros are hilarious. I love seeing the variations, the incompetence. We get stock footage, clip art, royalty free music and sound effects, jarring cuts, odd clips and a beautiful AI voice to cap it off. It helps me start off every video with a smile

I agree, it’s similar to how I truly believe that Jack was put on this earth to create unfathomably bad merch. He’s the Mozart of shitty merch, constantly testing the limits and shattering the boundaries of what you previously thought horrible boomer merch could look like. It would be impossible to replicate through satire; it’s the only genuine talent that this fat retard has.

When I see he’s released a new bucket hat covered in cropped-out bitmojis and cheap fair-use redbubble fonts, all decked out in garish clashing colors, I laugh harder than at anything else I see from Jack outside of him having a new stroke to add to the collection. When he came out with those shirts with the cumstains food/coffee stains, I had to resist the urge to buy one. God I love his merch, I hope he keeps making it and doesn’t lean too hard on the AI.

 

[p1138]

Andrew Cuomo's drunk-ass girlfriend who made horseshit like the Kwanzaa cake? Classic Food Network gold.

She was with him? LOL, no wonder her stupid ass didn't belong on that channel but seemed like a nepotism hire or something. As stupid as everything on her show was, it at least usually looked better than anything Fatty has ever come up with on his channel. As low a bar as that may be.

 

[Falcon Sebben]

This description reminds me so much of Semi Homemade with Sandra Lee. You guys should look it up if you want a professionally produced show to snark on with the same premise as Jack.

There was talk of Drunken Aunt Sandy early in the thread but she at least was entertaining... to a degree.

She's also famous for that culinary abomination the "Kwanzaa Cake". But my favorite was always when she tried to make a drink of cream, vodka, sugar and lemon juice. The idea was to make a kind of "lemon meringue pie" kind of cocktail. But what happens when you take an acid, like that found in cream, and mix it with the proteins found in milk? You get curds. The look on her face when she drank it was priceless.

She was with him? LOL, no wonder her stupid ass didn't belong on that channel but seemed like a nepotism hire or something. As stupid as everything on her show was, it at least usually looked better than anything Fatty has ever come up with on his channel. As low a bar as that may be.

Yeah but no. Half the time her culinary abominations looked like absolute shit. And like Fatty does she would always gush about how great it looked.

 

[Agamemnon Busmalis]

She's also famous for that culinary abomination the "Kwanzaa Cake". But my favorite was always when she tried to make a drink of cream, vodka, sugar and lemon juice. The idea was to make a kind of "lemon meringue pie" kind of cocktail. But what happens when you take an acid, like that found in cream, and mix it with the proteins found in milk? You get curds. The look on her face when she drank it was priceless.

I think the best was the "two shots of vodka", she measures liquor like Jack does shurgur.

 

[Falcon Sebben]

I think the best was the "two shots of vodka", she measures liquor like Jack does shurgur.

Or one of her cocktails was just vodka and some Starbucks frappacino you get at a grocery store with added... cinnamon or maybe just coffee grounds on top.

When your level of cocktail making is just "add vodka" it shouldn't be all that impressive or important.

 

[p1138]

Yeah but no. Half the time her culinary abominations looked like absolute shit. And like Fatty does she would always gush about how great it looked.

Still looks better than Fatty's bullshit.

I think the best was the "two shots of vodka", she measures liquor like Jack does shurgur.

I can just about smell the booze through the screen.

 

[Tiresome]

She's also famous for that culinary abomination the "Kwanzaa Cake". But my favorite was always when she tried to make a drink of cream, vodka, sugar and lemon juice. The idea was to make a kind of "lemon meringue pie" kind of cocktail. But what happens when you take an acid, like that found in cream, and mix it with the proteins found in milk? You get curds. The look on her face when she drank it was priceless.

The funny thing is, if you have an ounce of culinary skill, you can take the exact same ingredients and make a truly delicious albeit very old-fashioned dessert, posset.

 

[AnOminous]

But what happens when you take an acid, like that found in cream, and mix it with the proteins found in milk? You get curds. The look on her face when she drank it was priceless.

This was really predictable and I could have told you this. A novelty drink when I was in college, the sort of thing you'd drink on a dare, was called the Brain Hemorrhage. Fill a glass with Midori, pour Bailey's on top, then drop in a shot of grenadine.

 

[Tiki Bar Man 2]

I agree, it’s similar to how I truly believe that Jack was put on this earth to create unfathomably bad merch. He’s the Mozart of shitty merch, constantly testing the limits and shattering the boundaries of what you previously thought horrible boomer merch could look like. It would be impossible to replicate through satire; it’s the only genuine talent that this fat retard has.

When I see he’s released a new bucket hat covered in cropped-out bitmojis and cheap fair-use redbubble fonts, all decked out in garish clashing colors, I laugh harder than at anything else I see from Jack outside of him having a new stroke to add to the collection. When he came out with those shirts with the cumstains food/coffee stains, I had to resist the urge to buy one. God I love his merch, I hope he keeps making it and doesn’t lean too hard on the AI.

I legit kinda of need a jack on the go baseball cap lol ill wear it with pride and represent my king of /ck/

 

[Eternal Gopnik]

I legit kinda of need a jack on the go baseball cap lol ill wear it with pride and represent my king of /ck/

I have a friend I would gift a t-shirt to as a joke but I am not paying $25.99 plus shipping for a $2 t-shirt with a badly drawn sauce smear and the words "HOT DOG" on it, sorry.

 

[Free the Pedos]

Still looks better than Fatty's bullshit.

I can just about smell the booze through the screen.

I always enjoyed her tablescapes, the implication being you should buy processed, packaged food for your dinner party, and then spend $300 at Home Goods on tacky crap to clutter up the dinner table. That'll keep 'em coming back.

 

[Puggers]

I legit kinda of need a jack on the go baseball cap lol ill wear it with pride and represent my king of /ck/

Based on his live stream last week hes giving away $25.00 gift cards or something to his store. But, he didnt tell you how to win one. Just that, "I'll pick you and email you so make sure there's a public email on yuur account."

Assuming that if youre one of the 15 comments that don't get deleted on his YouTube videos that you'll have a shot at that sweet CWJ merch!

 

[REGENDarySumanai]

She was with him? LOL, no wonder her stupid ass didn't belong on that channel but seemed like a nepotism hire or something. As stupid as everything on her show was, it at least usually looked better than anything Fatty has ever come up with on his channel. As low a bar as that may be.

They dated for 14 years. No wonder she was drunk off her ass.

 

[Die Oberste Direktive]

At around 2:27 in the video Mommy-wife says something that causes Jack to pause for at least three seconds, I'm assuming to death-glare at her. I can't quite make out what she said, but maybe since the next thing he brings up is to preheat your oven maybe she was trying to whisper "oven" to remind him. Anyone else have a read on her comment?

 

[Puggers]

#mykicks.

Didn't know Jack was such a sneaker head!

 

[p1138]

#mykicks.

Didn't know Jack was such a sneaker head!

wtf does he need an $80 pair of sneakers for? He can't fucking walk. Also, wtf is that sore above his sock? If he loses a leg to the beetus, will he count that as weight loss?

 

[AltisticRight]

#mykicks.

Didn't know Jack was such a sneaker head!

#myhooves

Look at that diseased trotter. He needs to amputate that tendril growing from the torso to divert more nutrition to his beetus feet.

 

[Mundane Ralph]

#mykicks.

Didn't know Jack was such a sneaker head!

diabetes leg hole

 

[Puggers]

diabetes leg hole
View attachment 5949731

Onlyusemeblade saga incoming for Jack.