The Ragebait/Garbage Dump Megathread - Containment zone for "satire", fake news, and general low effort articles that were shat out for engagement and reactions


You might have noticed. Alt-right circles are buzzing with anti-cannibal fervor, and their toxic sludge is once again seeping onto social media. Even if you don’t follow any right-of-center accounts, the algos are dripfeeding video after video of what is purported to be Haitian cannibalism into all our timelines.

But what is cannibalism, and why is the right so eager to demonize it? If you are to believe the reactionaries, cannibalism is the act of eating another human being for some unspecified malicious reason. It’s really bad juju and definitely done under the influence of Satan, or George Soros (or both at the same time).

Quelle surprise: the imagery and notions underpinning this latest moral panic couldn’t be further from the truth. Cannibal culture is wide and varied, and has accompanied our species since the dawn of time. Cannibalism is often a deeply spiritual practice, or a desperate act undertaken in times of famine or war, or a sacred act meant to honor a revered dead (endocannibalism).

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Science agrees with the need for reality-based views on cannibalism.

The Aztecs, for instance, utilized cannibalism in rituals. They believed that their sun god, Huitzilopochtli, was waging a war against darkness. Sacrifices were necessary to aid Huitzilopochtli in this war. Though it might seem gruesome to spoiled western cosmopolitans — who very well might imagine the people sacrificed to be tied up and having this act performed against their will — most evidence suggests that these people were willing participants. It was considered a great honor to aid the sun god, and those who offered themselves to the cause were treated with great reverence.

After the sacred, voluntary, ritual was completed, ritual cannibalism commenced. The Aztec nobles believed that eating someone that had offered themselves to the gods was considered to be like communing with them. It was not just normal to be eaten by a fellow human being; it was considered a great honor.

Though cannibalism has been an accepted practice for millennia, disgust for cannibalism is a relatively new phenomena. Cannibalism has been documented in European societies well into the 1800s. During the Renaissance it was thought that certain parts of the body had healing effects, and the consumption of these parts was known as medicinal cannibalism.

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Science explains how cannibalism solves the food shortage problem and is environmentally friendly.

Public executions were seen as social events from the Middle Ages up until the mid-1800s, and the blood of the executed was sometimes considered to have medicinal healing powers (especially if the person executed was of notable status or had been convicted of a particularly heinous crime). People would gather at executions with cups or cloths to collect the blood directly as it flowed from the scaffold. This practice was rooted in the belief that the vitality of the executed person’s blood could cure ailments or diseases when consumed.

While this practice has declined since public executions disappeared, the use of human parts in medicine is still not uncommon. Fetal stem cells are used in numerous medical treatments. For example, umbilical cord blood (UCB) stem cells are widely used in the treatment of hematological disorders (Watt and Contreras, 2005), and fetal neural tissue has been associated with some clinical improvement in the treatment of Parkinson’s disease (Lindvall and Bjorklund, 2004).

So if cannibalism, the consumption of human matter by other humans, is so widespread, why is Haiti being criticized for this?

The answer is plain to see, if you only care to look. When Uruguayan Air Force Flight 571 crashed in the Andes mountains and the survivors stayed alive for several months by consuming human flesh, we immortalized them as heroes.

More recently, Haiti was called a “shithole country” by one Donald Trump — who at the same time praised countries like North Korea and Russia.

What do those people and countries have that Haiti does not?

The answer, of course, is whiteness. And there you have it.

The dark rise of anti-cannibal canards is simply the latest in a long line of attempts by the right to demonize black bodies. The people of Haiti are living their lives the way they want to. It might not be the way you would live yours; but then again, the way you live your life is certainly not the way a Haitian would want to live theirs, either.

We should not criticize cultures for being different from us. We should be praising these differences. Diversity is a core pillar of the American way, and is what built this country.

Haiti is simply the latest culture to re-normalize something that was always normal. Something that is in many ways religious, and sacred, and beautiful. Something intimate that us Americans will never experience with our primitive worldviews formed by a capitalist ruling class inundating us with anti-cannibal movie screen propaganda.

It really shouldn’t have to be said, but Hannibal Lector is not in any way representative of what most cannibals are like. Very few cannibals are murderers. Cannibalism is a sacred process to countless cultures, and it is deeply unfair — bigoted even — to judge them simply because we do not understand.

You eat pork, don’t you? People from middle eastern cultures look at you the same way you look at cannibals.

So be kind, and open your mind.
 

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Were there seriously people here thinking this was real? It's the same level of gimmick-posting I used to do, I know people are black pilled but Leftist loons aren't quite at this stage yet.
Yes, part autism, part seeing it as something they'd actually try.
 
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This was written by Fatrick in conjunction with Josh to defend their pepperoni business and Sargon of Akkad cuisine.
 
this is a joke, right?
right?
Yes it is. It’s no ‘modest proposal’ but it captures the lingo quite well
But also as it is current year, it’s also something you can quite imagine someone arguing. We live in interesting times.
 
I can't tell what's real and what's satire anymore. Is this what it was like for Boomers reading The Onion 20 years ago? Am I the old man getting phone scammed now? 🙁

It is funny though 2-3 pages in seeing people who only read the OP swooping in to breathlessly get mad about cannibalism because they didn't read the 10 posts saying the article was parody.

Today's satire is tomorrow's reality. Journoswine and Expert$ will be calling cannibalism a "Good Thing" within the next five years.

Yes, Soylent Green is people. Here's why that's a good thing.
 
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I can't tell what's real and what's satire anymore. Is this what it was like for Boomers reading The Onion 20 years ago? Am I the old man getting phone scammed now? 🙁

The Onion was pretty much always apparent satire at least, same for Babylon Bee... circa 2016 a lot of places that pretended to be real news popped up that were basically just posting satire shit but w/o a wink and a nudge. It's basically why "Fake News" became a thing before the media / Trump said the words.
 
Alright, you got me, I'm a retard (:_(I do wonder how long until someone unironically picks this argument and starts running with it. We're already at mutilating kids is saving lives, so how long until we're at the point eating bugs isn't enough, we gotta decolonize cooking?
 
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It’s usually only black people doing it and almost always black people BRAGGING about eating people. At least when the Jews eat babies they don’t post about it on social media.
 
You will eat ze corpse! Will soon replace the bugs, mark my words.
That's a satire website
Yes but it's not far from the thruth. I heard some academics use similar arguments to defend the practices of certain canibal or tribe or try to whitewash saying that they wasn't actual cannibalism but antoprophagism which meant that they didn't eate people on regular bases but only in certain occasions in a ritualised fashion, so is totally not the same thing guys!
 
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Reminds me of Jonathan Swift's satire, "A Modest Proposal for Preventing the Poor People from Being a Burden to Their Parents or Country, and for Making Them Beneficial to the Publick".

Swift advocates eating Irish babies, and it's still funny.
 
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I do wonder how long until someone unironically picks this argument and starts running with it.
Hopefully(?) sites like this can actually inject ideas into the left. Plenty of boomers got fooled by The Onion throughout the years. If "Afru" is suppressed by Facebook/Insta, X, et al. social media algorithms then it won't work.
 
We've all seen them shared here - poorly written drivel from some no-name blog putting out the most inflammatory nonsense the "writers" can muster. Some of you still take the bait and give these people exactly what they want, sharing it here and then getting worked up over it. These pieces aren't news but this phenomenon deserves broader discussion. Moving forward, post it here instead of creating a thread. Recognize what it is and then hopefully discussion can go beyond the initial feelings they are trying to get from you.
 
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