Lolcow KingCobraJFS / Josh Saunders - Amateur musician, YouTube Streamer, wandmaker, and self-proclaimed "sexy goth badboy". Perpetually circling the drain.

  • 🐕 I am attempting to get the site runnning as fast as possible. If you are experiencing slow page load times, please report it.
Okay, so if/when Cobes loses all his teeth from his poor hygiene and eating habits, I predict he’ll start making awful milkshake/smoothie monstrosities. Like ones similar to his already weird cocktails, but then adds ice cream, candy, fast food, etc.
 
  • Like
  • Thunk-Provoking
  • Horrifying
Reactions: Aiōn, semitooth, Ihatejackscalfani and 3 others
Cobes needs to start riding bike again. He is getting chunky
 

Attachments

  • _6d3f3008-2e92-47d5-9d36-8d45f826efa4.jpg
    _6d3f3008-2e92-47d5-9d36-8d45f826efa4.jpg
    202.2 KB · Views: 16
  • Like
  • Feels
  • DRINK!
Reactions: Simp Biscuit, Johnny Apple Sneed, HiveDull and 6 others
Blue Miaplacidus said:
The boy hiccup drunk mixing bowls of condiment slop is almost as good content as him telling stories about his outdoor adventures. Anyway, if he keeps up the eating bowls of cheese, gravy, and ranch dressing soup while drinking sugar slurry we're going to have to move the thread to deathfats sooner than later. Gettin fat son
View attachment 6020190
Click to expand...
That’s one gothic gut comin in nicely if I do say so myself
 
  • Winner
Reactions: Lesbian Sleepover and T-Ter
Blue Miaplacidus said:
move the thread to deathfats sooner than later.
Click to expand...
Pull up! Pull up!

Yeah that can start packing on a guy scary fast when it starts packing. And I have hard time imagining him staying consistent to lose weight for more than a day.
I actually think he has good genetics*, but he is just too much of sloth and hedonist.

*what comes to genetic limits for skeletal muscles, dude lost that lottery in so many other areas though.
 
Last edited:
  • Like
Reactions: エボラちゃん, biggacracka and O Puffers Where Art Thou?
The calories are a little harder to figure out since I don't know how much he exactly uses, unless he uses the whole pack, but;

- Whole Pack of Idahoan Instant Mash: 110cal per serving, 8 per container; 880cal
- Whole Jar of Baycun Beeyitz: 25cal per serving, 11 per container; 275cal
- About 2 Forkfuls Country Crock: 50cal per serving, 30 per container, serving size 1Tbsp; 100cal
- Maybe 1/4 Bottle? Lukraine Milk: 160cal per serving, 8 per contrainer; 320cal
- Maybe 1/4 Bottle? Daisy Sour Cream: 60cal per serving, 13 per container: 195cal
- Maybe 1/3 Bottle? (loves his ranch) Bacon Ranch: 120cal per serving, 16 per container: 640cal
- Whole Wedge D&W Cheese: 100cal per serving, 8 per container; 800cal
- Whole Jar of Brown Gravy: 25cal per serving, 6 per container: 150cal
- Maybe 1/4 Bag? Lukraine Cheddar: 110cal per serving, 8 per container; 220cal
- Maybe 1/3 Bag? Lays Cheddar Chips: 160cal per serving, 8 per container; 427cal
- Maybe 1/3 Bag? Cheetos Jalapeno Chips: 160cal per serving, 9 per container; 480cal
- Bottle of Guiness: 125cal

Total Calories: 4612cal

Huge margin of error of course but that's my best estimation, I was being conservative with the amounts too and didn't include seasonings.
 
  • Informative
  • Horrifying
  • Like
Reactions: Meiwaku, JenkinsJinkies, fullbanana and 26 others
Drive-By Comment said:
I actually think he has good genetics*, but he is just too much of sloth and hedonist.

*what comes to genetic limits for skeletal muscles, dude lost that lottery in so many other areas though.
Click to expand...
Definitely he does, must get get it from Clint who is in great shape. Cobes performs little to no physical exertion in his Groundhog Day of a life yet his arm size has always been respectable without being chubby (which will change if he keeps up his instant mashed potatoes and the like but that's a whole other story). Now look at someone like Teddy Feaser; you could smoke them little arms.
 
  • Agree
Reactions: Sicko Hunter, Ihatejackscalfani, Agamemnon Busmalis and 1 other person
  • Like
Reactions: 中华人民共和国的政治
中华人民共和国的政治 said:
The calories are a little harder to figure out since I don't know how much he exactly uses, unless he uses the whole pack, but;

- Whole Pack of Idahoan Instant Mash: 110cal per serving, 8 per container; 880cal
- Whole Jar of Baycun Beeyitz: 25cal per serving, 11 per container; 275cal
- About 2 Forkfuls Country Crock: 50cal per serving, 30 per container, serving size 1Tbsp; 100cal
- Maybe 1/4 Bottle? Lukraine Milk: 160cal per serving, 8 per contrainer; 320cal
- Maybe 1/4 Bottle? Daisy Sour Cream: 60cal per serving, 13 per container: 195cal
- Maybe 1/3 Bottle? (loves his ranch) Bacon Ranch: 120cal per serving, 16 per container: 640cal
- Whole Wedge D&W Cheese: 100cal per serving, 8 per container; 800cal
- Whole Jar of Brown Gravy: 25cal per serving, 6 per container: 150cal
- Maybe 1/4 Bag? Lukraine Cheddar: 110cal per serving, 8 per container; 220cal
- Maybe 1/3 Bag? Lays Cheddar Chips: 160cal per serving, 8 per container; 427cal
- Maybe 1/3 Bag? Cheetos Jalapeno Chips: 160cal per serving, 9 per container; 480cal
- Bottle of Guiness: 125cal

Total Calories: 4612cal

Huge margin of error of course but that's my best estimation, I was being conservative with the amounts too and didn't include seasonings.
Click to expand...
Sodium: Yes.
 
  • Like
  • Winner
Reactions: LiquidChrisRespecter, clipartfan92, biggacracka and 4 others
JFC, just saw the mashed potatoes. Never seen him this messed up but im a cobra newfag so idk much. Any ideas on what hes on? Some people on youtube are saying pills or duster or alcohol. Personally I think its just alcohol. Duster lasts pretty short afaik and his impairment doesnt seem to change throughout the video. And josh is too retarded to be able to source pills (but once again, im a newfag, i dont know his wizard powers)
 
  • Agree
Reactions: Your Landlord
中华人民共和国的政治 said:
The calories are a little harder to figure out since I don't know how much he exactly uses, unless he uses the whole pack, but;

- Whole Pack of Idahoan Instant Mash: 110cal per serving, 8 per container; 880cal
- Whole Jar of Baycun Beeyitz: 25cal per serving, 11 per container; 275cal
- About 2 Forkfuls Country Crock: 50cal per serving, 30 per container, serving size 1Tbsp; 100cal
- Maybe 1/4 Bottle? Lukraine Milk: 160cal per serving, 8 per contrainer; 320cal
- Maybe 1/4 Bottle? Daisy Sour Cream: 60cal per serving, 13 per container: 195cal
- Maybe 1/3 Bottle? (loves his ranch) Bacon Ranch: 120cal per serving, 16 per container: 640cal
- Whole Wedge D&W Cheese: 100cal per serving, 8 per container; 800cal
- Whole Jar of Brown Gravy: 25cal per serving, 6 per container: 150cal
- Maybe 1/4 Bag? Lukraine Cheddar: 110cal per serving, 8 per container; 220cal
- Maybe 1/3 Bag? Lays Cheddar Chips: 160cal per serving, 8 per container; 427cal
- Maybe 1/3 Bag? Cheetos Jalapeno Chips: 160cal per serving, 9 per container; 480cal
- Bottle of Guiness: 125cal

Total Calories: 4612cal

Huge margin of error of course but that's my best estimation, I was being conservative with the amounts too and didn't include seasonings.
Click to expand...
Leave it to Cobes to take something as simple as instant mashed potatoes, and make it unnecessarily complicated. He could’ve made himself real mashed potatoes with garlic and actual bacon for cheaper. Also, cooking mashed potatoes in beer is a food crime, but Cobes has squalid enough living conditions that it’s punishment in itself.

It looks like cat food:
D2FB73C3-E548-44CC-B67C-3563775C4BAD.jpeg
 
  • Horrifying
  • Like
  • Islamic Content
Reactions: Daddy's Little Shitbag, AmateurComedicTaxidermist, Umaibae and 10 others
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back