Has this bitch said anything about her father? I've seen more of her journal saying shit about her mother but admittedly I'm not combing through it all.
And as far as the sexual abuse theory goes, here's my spin:
She, a girl, had been raped by man (obviously)
She doesn't want to be a girl, because she was victimized being a girl, so she wants to be a man, to be the strong one, the aggressor.
She was anally raped
Given her desire for angry buttsex she wants to dish out onto others what's been done to her
She was in a mental state of arrested development
Pretty obvious, I know but I assumed that these pages were written as a teenager, but no, she was fucking 28. So I'm guessing these ideas of her playing with her build-a-bears, giving them big ol' ass rammer cocks was also done at 28, but what's confusing it her diary reads as if it's written by a teenager, but what teenager is still
playing with her bears? Collecting them is one thing, even going as far to make a bear to commemorate an occasion, like christmas, birthday, first date, etc. isn't really that weird, but even a 12 year boy that still plays with his G.I. Joes is kinda weird, let alone someone in their 20s.
she was buttraped in her teenage years
This again might be obvious but a lot of speculation seems to be she was abused as a very young child, but I don't think that's the case. I think she was always autistic and retarded, but the rape more than likely happened at an age where she understood the concept of anal sex, perhaps even she was still a vaginal virgin, because from her writing it doesn't seem like she even knew what vaginal penetration felt like, what with the idea of just slamming her imaginary giant flintrock penis (even bigger because
she Tony had an erection) in an asshole when it wouldn't fit in a vagina.
Basically is she was a "virgin" but got her asshole gaped, it hurt and made her feel like a helpless victim, instead of going the regular route and becoming a full on dyke over it she wanted to BE the man so she could do the ass fucking. What girl, that wants to be a guy or not, thinks about anal sex before vaginal anyway? And she never was on HRT or testosterone because she wasn't actually dysmorphic. She just wanted to be a guy for power reasons then heard about the tranny shit all over the news, got excited,
EUREKA! NOW I CAN BE MAN! But then learned quickly that since she went through puberty already it was basically all fucking over for any hopes of her ever being anything masculine ever. So for that she hated children. She wasn't gay because she loved women, she fucking hate girls because they reminded her of being weak, she admired men because they had penises, but hated them not because of rape, but because they had the tool she didn't, and she hated children because they also had something she didn't have. The time and "opportunity" to be what was far, far too late for her.
The only surprising thing is she didn't kill her parents first. But I have heard she had written plans to kill her father, I've never seen that, but I was told earlier today. Was he the one who gaped her? The world may never know.