Greer v. Moon, No. 20-cv-00647 (D. Utah Sep. 16, 2020)

[Man In A Dress]

You know, Russell should look into buying an old battleship and making it a whorehouse in international waters. He could create his own floating country a la Pirate Radio. Then we could see this case resolved by the United Nations.
United Nations Convention on the Law of the Sea (UNCLOS): The UNCLOS is the cornerstone of the Law of the Sea, providing a framework for states to cooperate and resolve disputes.
Maritime Law, unironically.

Prostituées Sans Frontières: Providing their services to all clients, regardless of nation or ideology.
Now all Greer needs is a Mother Base in the Carribbean to conduct his global prostitution ops.

 

[DHugo]

Null should 1v1 Rust Greer to settle the matter

 

[Sexy Senior Citizen]

null should move to some US air force base in turkey, and then request a case transfer to the court martial at that base

"You honor, that is a gilded edge flag. That flag means this is a court martial, and by law I cannot be court martialed twice. That is all."

 

[East_Clintwood]

You know, Russell should look into buying an old battleship and making it a whorehouse in international waters. He could create his own floating country a la Pirate Radio. Then we could see this case resolved by the United Nations.
United Nations Convention on the Law of the Sea (UNCLOS): The UNCLOS is the cornerstone of the Law of the Sea, providing a framework for states to cooperate and resolve disputes.
Maritime Law, unironically.

Broke: Wanting Russ to make the SS Seawhores so we can solve this dispute with boring ass maritime law
Woke: Wanting Russ to make the SS Seawhores so we can become pirates, board it and send it and his stupid gimpy face right to the bottom of the Great Pacific Garbage patch where it belongs.

 

[Your Starter for 10]

There's only one court that has the authority and and ability to handle a case of this magnitude and complexity.

Both parties in the suit must agree to dismiss their court cases and have their disputes settled here, in our forum — The People's Court.

And I mean the fucking original. I don't know if we gotta resurrect Wapner or put everyone in a time machine, but either way, that's the only place this gets handled.

 

[Bill Evans 45]

You know, Russell should look into buying an old battleship and making it a whorehouse in international waters.

Greer is scared of flying, so he's on that ship for life. This would be a great outcome for the women of the world. 'The Rusty wAnchor' must happen, gotdangit.

Sadly, Greer can't even afford name brand cereal and has to save up for his biannual brothel visits. He gave a guy a hand job in exchange for a ride because he didn't have gas money. The ship dream will sink without trace like all his Endeavours.

 

[Debbie Macomber]

People keep talking about how pro se comes with an automatic tard shield originally meant for DEFENDING one's self in criminal proceedings, but what confuses me is, criminal proceedings seem to give LESS of a tard shield.

The second a pro se in a criminal case says some sovcit garbage, the judge says "Fuck you you fucking retard! If you every pull that shit in my court again I'm banishing you to prison without a trial!"

For some reason, it seems that this being a civil proceeding gives Russ MORE leeway to file nonsense and get infinite slack!

 

[Friend of Dorothy Parker]

There's only one court that has the authority and and ability to handle a case of this magnitude and complexity.

Both parties in the suit must agree to dismiss their court cases and have their disputes settled here, in our forum — The People's Court.

And I mean the fucking original. I don't know if we gotta resurrect Wapner or put everyone in a time machine, but either way, that's the only place this gets handled.

Wapner was too nice. This screams for Judge Judy.

 

[TETRABAX]

People keep talking about how pro se comes with an automatic tard shield originally meant for DEFENDING one's self in criminal proceedings, but what confuses me is, criminal proceedings seem to give LESS of a tard shield.

The second a pro se in a criminal case says some sovcit garbage, the judge says "Fuck you you fucking retard! If you every pull that shit in my court again I'm banishing you to prison without a trial!"

For some reason, it seems that this being a civil proceeding gives Russ MORE leeway to file nonsense and get infinite slack!

I'm not a lawyer but is pro se defence given so much leeway because of you fuck up you get fined/jailed and as a pro se prosecution your case should at least be clear enough to stand on it's own merit? There is no shortage of retards that attempt to use the courts for any perceived slight even when nothing illegal has taken place

 

[DSP's Tax Lawyer]

Fuck at this point he could request it be transferred to tax court. The IRS couldn’t be worse.

The IRS are retards and would probably believe Russell's lies about his plights and how hes moved on

 

[Sexy Senior Citizen]

Wapner was too nice. This screams for Judge Judy.

He was actually offered an appearance on Judge Judy during his Ariana Grande lolsuit. He rejected it for multiple reasons, including his fear of flying, the fact that he wouldn't get the monetary reward he wanted ($5,000 vs the $7,000 he wanted), and the fact Ariana Grande wouldn't be compelled to face him personally.

 

[mindlessobserver]

He was actually offered an appearance on Judge Judy during his Ariana Grande lolsuit. He rejected it for multiple reasons, including his fear of flying, the fact that he wouldn't get the monetary reward he wanted ($5,000 vs the $7,000 he wanted), and the fact Ariana Grande wouldn't be compelled to face him personally.

Damn, that is some next level lost media. I am imagining shit lips on Judge Judy over him suing Ariana Grande. You could not pay enough money for Kino of that magnitude. We were fucking robbed bros.

 

[Mexican Molotov Marauder]

Fuck at this point he could request it be transferred to tax court. The IRS couldn’t be worse.

Hard disagree. Having the case be adjudicated by Satan himself would be preferable to any tax agency.

 

[filthypenguin]

Hard disagree. Having the case be adjudicated by Satan himself would be preferable to any tax agency.

Fun fact, the word "Satan" originally referred to the ancient equivalent of "prosecutor" in court. The biblical Satan probably was originally meant to refer to the angel with the position of prosecutor in God's court. The story of Job is the story of God's prosecutor accusing Job of only being faithful because he had a good life.

 

[Napoleon III]

I'm not a lawyer but is pro se defence given so much leeway because of you fuck up you get fined/jailed and as a pro se prosecution your case should at least be clear enough to stand on it's own merit? There is no shortage of retards that attempt to use the courts for any perceived slight even when nothing illegal has taken place

The thing about criminal court is that you get a state appointed lawyer.

You don't for civil court.

I've said things about the legal system and pro-se litigants before which have been unpopular but pro-se getting special privileges is by design.

 

[TETRABAX]

The thing about criminal court is that you get a state appointed lawyer.

You don't for civil court.

I've said things about the legal system and pro-se litigants before which have been unpopular but pro-se getting special privileges is by design.

I'm not too familiar with a lot of the differences, but I know civil courts do a lot of "mediation" for non-illegal situations like child support. My question I guess then is, are things like libel and slander not actual crimes and are just civil liabilities?

 

[Apteryx Owenii]

I'm not too familiar with a lot of the differences, but I know civil courts do a lot of "mediation" for non-illegal situations like child support. My question I guess then is, are things like libel and slander not actual crimes and are just civil liabilities?

There is such a thing as 'criminal defamation' in some jurisdictions, but it's rarely prosecuted as such. Typically civil courts are the route for that.

 

[DHugo]

Damn, that is some next level lost media. I am imagining shit lips on Judge Judy over him suing Ariana Grande. You could not pay enough money for Kino of that magnitude. We were fucking robbed bros.

The real Ariana Grande court recording is even better, he got there 35min late

 

[Friend of Dorothy Parker]

He was actually offered an appearance on Judge Judy during his Ariana Grande lolsuit. He rejected it for multiple reasons, including his fear of flying, the fact that he wouldn't get the monetary reward he wanted ($5,000 vs the $7,000 he wanted), and the fact Ariana Grande wouldn't be compelled to face him personally.

Jesus, I thought you were talking about Wapner & had to read it twice. Too many martinis last night, it seems.

Eta: @DHugo I have not seen this - thanks!

 

[Himedall All-seeing Waifu]

Somehow the US District Court in Guam will get jurisdiction.

Logically, there is no way for Guam to get jurisdiction, but this case has managed to defy all logic so my money is on Guam.

You know, Russell should look into buying an old battleship and making it a whorehouse in international waters. He could create his own floating country a la Pirate Radio. Then we could see this case resolved by the United Nations.
United Nations Convention on the Law of the Sea (UNCLOS): The UNCLOS is the cornerstone of the Law of the Sea, providing a framework for states to cooperate and resolve disputes.
Maritime Law, unironically.

I was going for Admiralty Court, but of the 'fringed flag' SovCit variety. I want to see if a taser can spasm Russ' lips far enough to touch for the first time in his life.