UK British News Megathread - aka CWCissey's news thread

https://news.sky.com/story/row-over-new-greggs-vegan-sausage-rolls-heats-up-11597679

A heated row has broken out over a move by Britain's largest bakery chain to launch a vegan sausage roll.

The pastry, which is filled with a meat substitute and encased in 96 pastry layers, is available in 950 Greggs stores across the country.

It was promised after 20,000 people signed a petition calling for the snack to be launched to accommodate plant-based diet eaters.


But the vegan sausage roll's launch has been greeted by a mixed reaction: Some consumers welcomed it, while others voiced their objections.

View image on Twitter


spread happiness@p4leandp1nk
https://twitter.com/p4leandp1nk/status/1080767496569974785

#VEGANsausageroll thanks Greggs

7
10:07 AM - Jan 3, 2019

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Cook and food poverty campaigner Jack Monroe declared she was "frantically googling to see what time my nearest opens tomorrow morning because I will be outside".

While TV writer Brydie Lee-Kennedy called herself "very pro the Greggs vegan sausage roll because anything that wrenches veganism back from the 'clean eating' wellness folk is a good thing".

One Twitter user wrote that finding vegan sausage rolls missing from a store in Corby had "ruined my morning".

Another said: "My son is allergic to dairy products which means I can't really go to Greggs when he's with me. Now I can. Thank you vegans."

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pg often@pgofton
https://twitter.com/pgofton/status/1080772793774624768

The hype got me like #Greggs #Veganuary


42
10:28 AM - Jan 3, 2019

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TV presenter Piers Morgan led the charge of those outraged by the new roll.

"Nobody was waiting for a vegan bloody sausage, you PC-ravaged clowns," he wrote on Twitter.

Mr Morgan later complained at receiving "howling abuse from vegans", adding: "I get it, you're all hangry. I would be too if I only ate plants and gruel."

Another Twitter user said: "I really struggle to believe that 20,000 vegans are that desperate to eat in a Greggs."

"You don't paint a mustach (sic) on the Mona Lisa and you don't mess with the perfect sausage roll," one quipped.

Journalist Nooruddean Choudry suggested Greggs introduce a halal steak bake to "crank the fume levels right up to 11".

The bakery chain told concerned customers that "change is good" and that there would "always be a classic sausage roll".

It comes on the same day McDonald's launched its first vegetarian "Happy Meal", designed for children.

The new dish comes with a "veggie wrap", instead of the usual chicken or beef option.

It should be noted that Piers Morgan and Greggs share the same PR firm, so I'm thinking this is some serious faux outrage and South Park KKK gambiting here.

 

[Old English Roast Beef]

View attachment 6150491

Look at the tattoos on that man. That's how you know he's a hardened criminal, innit?

 

[Morethanabitfoolish]

The bad news is the coalition would be with the Lib Dems and they’re batshit sex pests nowadays.

Some people are positively masturbating themselves dry at the thought of Labour with Lib Dems in second place. So progressive! So pro-European!

 

[Hiphopopotamus]

“We take a zero tolerance to bladed articles in public, and Bray has fallen afoul of this.”

If only they took a zero tolerance to child raping gangs or acid attacks too.

 

[Product Placement]

​

I hope Sunak has his bags packed and a moving van ready because on Thursday night that man is being evicted.
View attachment 6149885
Reform with 16% effectively becoming the UK's third party if the numbers are correct.

Not with how UK voting works, they will be 5th at best, SNP and LD may get less votes but will get more seats. Right now polling as them any where between 3 and 7 seats, however their polling numbers have been going down lately, so likely to be closer to 3 than 7.

But if they do get the 3rd highest vote, expect a lot of talk from them about reforming the voting the system to be proportional representation voting. Something Green and Lib Dems also want, but Labours, SNP and Tories don't.

 

[Chunky Salsa]

What is it with Bri'ish police and needlessly arresting autistics?

The police are given arrest number orders because they are insane totalitarians; but will only mess with those too isolated, weak or disabled to fight back because they're thin skinned faggot cowards.

 

[Low IQ Doctor]

This is autistic discrimination

 

[The Noticer]

If only they took a zero tolerance to child raping gangs or acid attacks too.

Only if white people are committing the crimes.

 

[isalaide]

The police are given arrest number orders because they are insane totalitarians; but will only mess with those too isolated, weak or disabled to fight back because they're thin skinned faggot cowards.

lmao the general public don't realise it but this is literally true. The imposition of police performance targets to ensure "value for the taxpayer" means the police have to get specific target ratios of crimes closed and crimes resulting in conviction. So since for this purpose the crimes aren't weighted, a serious sexual assault that takes months of careful investigation and takes 2 years to get to court only improves your numbers by as much as lifting one fucking spastic in the street with a sword, you go and lift the spastic instead of playing hunt the rapist.

 

[snowdunes]

The face of a man who realizes the state of Bri'ish justice:

British police sentence man to 4 months over Master Sword toy (archive)
by Brandon Lyttle on July 3, 2024

View attachment 6150491

British courts have sentenced a man to four months in jail for carrying a tiny Master Sword replica in public.

According to the Warwickshire police, the man was found guilty of possessing a bladed weapon in public. On June 8 he was spotted carrying the toy in the town of Nuneaton. Police were informed of his toy-carrying activities via CCTV footage and responded promptly.

Anthony Bray, a 48 year old man was approached by police and insisted he had no intentions of using his toy to cause harm and it was intended to be a “fidget” which he used to keep his hands occupied.

The Master Sword is the iconic weapon wielded by Link in The Legend of Zelda series and is used to slay the evil Ganon whenever he appears throughout history, the two bound by fate to fight.

In a 12 month period ending in March 2023, there were 244 fatal stabbings in England and Wales and 101 of those were committed with household kitchen knifes. We haven’t been able to find any statistic on Master Swords.

Damn, it really went downhill for Andrew Huberman...

 

[Bill Evans 45]

Obviously there's no actual reason why Parliament needs to take place in Parliament

Do you remember when some mad lad suggested that the temporary Parliament could be outside London?

They're supposed to be running the country, not LARPing as Victorians.

Well they brought back the deserving/undeserving poor rhetoric, the Rookeries of London, infant mortality increases, hospitals sometimes being more dangerous than staying at home, abysmal education standards for anyone except the wealthy, filthy streets, sweatshops, dangerous levels of pollution in water, TB*, toll roads, reversed women's rights, a rentier economy, isolationism from Europe and Rule Britannia.

However no Victorian gentleman would loaf on a bench like Mogg, even in his own home. That behavior is for oafs, cads, ruffians, ner' do wells and those of a lavender inclination.


*Albeit imported, but still their fault.

 

[Thumb Butler]

Imagine living in Britain.

 

[BallsDeepInAi]

This is autistic discrimination

Down with the monarchy!
God save the autists!

 

[Coccxys]

Labour have suddenly taken a hit in the polls today. I mean they're still easily winning but someone fucked something up in the campaign.

 

[FedPostalService]

Right lads, I’ve settled on voting for Reform as a fuck you to all the gay ops the establishment are running on them.

I’ll naturally tell anyone one IRL I just spoiled my ballot.

 

[Overly Serious]

The Legend of Zelda: Total Britbong Death

Maybe even down to the cellular level, since there is clearly something fundamentally wrong with the British Isles. Clearly Lovecraft was right and they’re all fish people.

Minor footnote, it was actually Colin Wilson that wrote the Mythos story Return of the Lloigor which suggested that the Welsh specifically had tainted bloodlines as legacies from the lost degenerate continent of Mu. The fish people of Innsmouth might be of English descent but the blood taint explicitly was introduced post arrival in New England as Captain Marsh who had trafficked in the "South Seas" either brought back Deep Ones or brought back knowledge of them enabling contact with local New England ones.

A bit off-topic, but Return of the Lloigor is one of the my favourite Mythos stories and one of the rare ones actually set in Britain.

lmao the general public don't realise it but this is literally true. The imposition of police performance targets to ensure "value for the taxpayer" means the police have to get specific target ratios of crimes closed and crimes resulting in conviction. So since for this purpose the crimes aren't weighted, a serious sexual assault that takes months of careful investigation and takes 2 years to get to court only improves your numbers by as much as lifting one fucking spastic in the street with a sword, you go and lift the spastic instead of playing hunt the rapist.

Don't forget racial targets as well. I recall someone saying some years back that they'd been stopped on entering the library by a police officer. This was during the furore over "Stop and Search". He asked the officer if they were at the library to try and even out the racial numbers for Stop and Search and police officer sheepishly admitted they were.

 

[innocent jogger]

The face of a man who realizes the state of Bri'ish justice:

British police sentence man to 4 months over Master Sword toy (archive)
by Brandon Lyttle on July 3, 2024

View attachment 6150491

British courts have sentenced a man to four months in jail for carrying a tiny Master Sword replica in public.

According to the Warwickshire police, the man was found guilty of possessing a bladed weapon in public. On June 8 he was spotted carrying the toy in the town of Nuneaton. Police were informed of his toy-carrying activities via CCTV footage and responded promptly.

Anthony Bray, a 48 year old man was approached by police and insisted he had no intentions of using his toy to cause harm and it was intended to be a “fidget” which he used to keep his hands occupied.

The Master Sword is the iconic weapon wielded by Link in The Legend of Zelda series and is used to slay the evil Ganon whenever he appears throughout history, the two bound by fate to fight.

In a 12 month period ending in March 2023, there were 244 fatal stabbings in England and Wales and 101 of those were committed with household kitchen knifes. We haven’t been able to find any statistic on Master Swords.

When I was in high school/college I loved British TV like Dr. Who, Young Ones, Monty Python, AbFab, etc., British punk rock/heavy metal and movies like Snatch and American Werewolf in London. I was totally into visiting there and maybe shacking up with some cute English bird and staying a while.

Fast forward to Current Year: FUCK. THAT. PLACE. Seriously, what the hell is happening over there? It's like the Woke Virus went turbo mode.

 

[Overly Serious]

Labour have suddenly taken a hit in the polls today. I mean they're still easily winning but someone fucked something up in the campaign.

View attachment 6150680

Well by the looks of that blue line it's not people switching to Conservatives! I guess as Reform continues to climb they're getting out of that "wasted vote" category that dissuades people from voting for them and perhaps some of the anti-Conservatives are starting to consider that Reform may be a better protest vote than Labour.

Right lads, I’ve settled on voting for Reform as a fuck you to all the gay ops the establishment are running on them.

I’ll naturally tell anyone one IRL I just spoiled my ballot.

Naturally!

For myself, I haven't decided. I've been reading statements by the local candidates and their bios. The Tory candidate is old school and actually appears to have been pretty active in parliament. So that's something. The Reform candidate actually presents very well. The Lib Dem candidate is laughably unsupportable. I mean, aside from any feelings I have about policy or their party, it's like he as an individual is actively trying to lose.

There's an independent who actually comes across very well and I approve on principle. If I don't vote for any of the mains I've decided I'll vote for him rather than spoil my ballot.

 

[Null]

SUFFER ENGLAND

 

[Xarpho's Return]

via CCTV footage and responded promptly.

So it wasn't even "concerned citizen" stuff, it was a surveillance state and sent out the goons immediately.

Over what amounts to a letter opener.

 

[teriyakiburns]

What is it with Bri'ish police and needlessly arresting autistics?

They hate anyone smarter than they are, so they become police to make themselves feel important, then come down like a ton of bricks anyone who doesn't respect their vaunted position or pay sufficient obeisance to their superior station in life. They will even arrest someone simply for getting gobby at them and make up a justification after the fact. For all these reasons, a meeting between officer knacker and an autist spells certain doom.