Bossman Austin Curtis Peterson / BossmanJack / AustinGambles / Austin_07 / irondollah - Gambling addict, convicted felon, scammer, and raging manchild that hates his fucking life, FAKE MONEY

[Tetragrammaton]

the come down from drugs and gambling is gonna be something else. i wonder if he will start trying to make bets with other people just to get some form of buzz.

 

[thebigdream]

The first day of prison, Bossman walks into the warden's office for a meeting. The warden is sitting in a large leather chair, his back to Bossman. With dramatic flair, he swivels around to face him. Who is it? None other than Evil Eddie in the flesh, in front of him a switchboard controlling all the prison's lighting, security, you name it. That's right, he flicks all the switches. Nervous, Bossman averts Evil Eddie's gaze and glances around the room, his eyes settling on a cage situated on a side table, within it a rat running on a wheel. Maybe it's the crack comedown, but the creature's face looks suspiciously familiar. Bossman pinches himself, wondering if this is all a dream. But it isn't. He thinks about screaming. This is all wrong, IT'S SO WRONG DUDE! But when he opens his mouth, all he hears is a squeak. He's the rat now.

 

[Maori Kiwifruit Growers]

Jailbirds of the farms, how common is gambling in prison and how serious do people take it?

 

[AnIntrepidCrow]

Bossman needs to stand in his own defense and ask for a double or nothing probation from the judge; 10 years lowest.

 

[Catboy Ranch]

Lmao. Dude straight up snitched. Who's the RAT again, Austin? He's gonna be pc'ed up just like Chris. No way he'll be allowed on the yard to Gamba. They don't even need his paperwork, there's a fucking newspaper story. Lol. He'll be fucked in prison too. BMJ shaking in his crocs right now. I know I would be. Jail is going to suck for him in particular.

idk in my book he's bf material

3 videos in I can already tell with 100% certainty there is no gag reflex

 

[Cornfed]

Evil fucking Eddie did this.

 

[Exortism]

Will there be bodycam footage for this as well? If so will this continue to be a reoccurring theme for cow arrest footage?

 

[Bruno Powroznik]

Season 1 of Prison Break Virginia comes out this summer

 

[ForTheHoard]

I don't want to tag Null, but are efforts already being made to get the arrest footage?

 

[Bruno Powroznik]

I don't want to tag Null, but are efforts already being made to get the arrest footage?

yes, its unlikely though

 

[Attractive Sexhaver]

It's 2030. Bossman did every day of the ten years he had owing on his jacket, and the moment he was released he forsook gambling and drugs to live deep in the woods of rural Virginia, where he's remained for the last six years.
He's chopping firewood a short distance away from his simple log cabin. The muscles in his forearms bulge as he swings the axe. Time and the terrain have transformed him from an emaciated ghoul into a taut and muscular man of the wilderness. His hands are still stained black, but now it's with the rich loam of the Virginia soil and not the soot of a crack pipe.

He wipes the sweat from his brow as a helicopter hovers overhead. It sets down in the clearing next to his cabin, sending leaves and debris flying. Trapper-- his loyal but aging hound-- comes scurrying from the cabin. Trapper's barks are drowned out by the swoosh of the rotors.

Stenciled onto the side of the chopper is the Stake slots Cat. The doors fling open and Niggardly Noah, Eddie and Derrick Xmas roadie run out. Derrick raises his hands placatingly as Austin reaches for his nearby rifle. "We aren't here to start trouble, Boss" Eddie reassures him. "We need your help. A bug in our AI that controls the switch has gone rogue, and we can't stop coin flip from squirting. Every degen that throws is making bank. It's not only ruining our businesses but threatens to collapse the entire crypto market. Only you have enough raw talent to lose under these conditions and restore the balance."

Austin squinted and looked out over the treeline. Before he could tell them to go away Noah chimed in. "If you're willing to help us, we can promise you 100k daily reloads. Raw."

"Plus all the crack you can smoke, boss" Derrick chimed in.

Austin dropped the axe as he climbed into the chopper. "Dewd. This is so wrong."

 

[False and Misleading]

Can a tech nigga explain this?

I'm going to try to simplify so no one get on my ass about missing parts here. Web apps (fancy websites, think this jail site, or Amazon or Google) have two (or more) layers, an application to return the data, and application to render the data on your screen. While the latter happens with the help of your browser, both sets of data are returned to your computer. The data is there, it's just that the jeet who made the site decided to not show it on the website using the part that works in your browser. If you just look at the code/data returned from the website, its all there in the end.

 

[MadStan]

It has been said, and it is perhaps repetitive, but even for a LOLCOW, within a 2 week period witnessing a man with 180,000 in his wallet, and 14,000 per week being thrown at him by sponsors, with tens of thousands of followers to this is just utterly remarkable.

If it were gymnastics, he got a 9.7

I think Nick rightly won the LOLCOW of the year last time, but Austin is just showing off now and barring a gun shoot out at Nick's house or spitting in the judges face, Austin has swept the nomination.

In failure, KF will bestow him the ultimate victory.

 

[fat_rat_on_the_grass]

I keep thinking about poor bossmom/ratmom and how sad she must be right now.

 

[The handsome tard]

I hate this timeline that Chris didnt stay there enough to meet BMJ and we could have had a crossover

Also, Youtubers like this one must be kicking themselves hard now for not delaying their video's creation for 2/3 months

They JUST missed the window of opportunity with the algorithm

 

[poopshoes]

I wonder how quickly he's going to freak out and tell some other inmate he fucked their mom and gets his ass whooped plus adds more charges. He's in the worst condition possible in a total nightmare scenario for a regular healthy person, there is no way he is going to just coast through this no matter if it's a week or a month or 5 years.

 

[Die Oberste Direktive]

Alright I'm calling it, BossmanJack knocked his brother out cold in a stunning 48-72 hours since the bet was made!
Congratulations to @T-Ter @dumbledore @Postal Dude @Doxmatix @Drunkensailor @PositiveMonk @11apocalyptic11 @Coca Cola Official @Love Is Blue @Tofu Dust @Soup Sammiches and @Spasticus Autisticus

and my condolences to @BigFatSweatyMan @Wimbydong @ScurvyRat @Boglim Enthusiast @Cumeatsioner Gordon @Claude Sigma @blanketdog @Gooby @Rome Is Burning @Die Oberste Direktive and @Basement Dwelling Dork , your moms are now forfeit.

That's twice now that I lost a bet in this thread... Sorry mom, gotta take another one for the team.

 

[Glowie]

Will he gamble with snacks from commissionary? Will end up betting away M&Ms?

 

[Strix454]

Your revolution is over, Mr. Peterson. Condolences. The bums lost. My advice is to do what your parents did; get a job, sir. The bums will always lose. Do you hear me, Bossman Jack? The bums will always lose.

 

[Chuck Chudjak]

Can we try to convince the state of virginia that gambling is a human right and bossman deserves the anders breivik treatment or is this idea too nutty?

Those prison gamba streams would be kino ngl