Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

[AltisticRight]

That chicken has to be a war crime against several ethnicities and species of animals.

It always crack me up when those chef reaction channels tell people to not make fun of the person, that he's a nice guy when it's the opposite. Jack Scalfani is vile and delusional as both a person and a cook. He deserves to be made fun of for how he treats normal people trying to survive by doing low wage jobs.

 

[BlastMonk]

PARMESAN CHICKEN​

(07/05/24)

Original:

Preserve Tube: https://preservetube.com/watch?v=wWM44PBk06c

Spoiler: Archive (480p):

View attachment 6158790

"(All American Water) are the ones that prevented my kidney stones, by filtering my water in all my house"
Mush mouth 'my water in all my house' aside what the fuck is he on about? He was getting kidney stones and he thinks drinking filtered water helped? I think just drinking water and not fizzy drinks is what did it Jack

 

[desudesu]

PARMESAN CHICKEN​

(07/05/24)

Original:

Preserve Tube: https://preservetube.com/watch?v=wWM44PBk06c

Spoiler: Archive (480p):

View attachment 6158790

So, Jack is still pumping out videos (and food) of such abhorrent quality and he still thinks he is a super popular Youtube Chef that deserves an entire brand new "kitchen + podcast studio" built for himself. Maximum narc delusion.

 

[p1138]

It always crack me up when those chef reaction channels tell people to not make fun of the person, that he's a nice guy when it's the opposite

It's lipservice so they don't run afoul of youtube's stupid drama rules. The equivalent of "I'm not a financial advisor and this is not financial advice, btw boogie2988's crypto currency is dumb don't buy it"

 

[Uber driver reviewer]

Better known as "Jane Traynor" as opposed to Jim Traynor who is Hammy's bull.


Still sperging about the bones or else the meat is fake.

And the end result still looks like shit. There's a decent recipe hiding in there but what he made was fucking disgusting.

I think Jim Traynor dumped Hammy after Junior started trying to peek inside the upstairs (inaccessible to Jack) bedroom to see his muscles.


The only straight person in that house is Brianna.

"(All American Water) are the ones that prevented by kidney stones, by filtering my water in all my house"
Mush mouth 'my water in all my house' aside what the fuck is he on about? He was getting kidney stones and he thinks drinking filtered water helped? I think just drinking water and not fizzy drinks is what did it Jack

Jack alternately blames kidney stones and begetibles (broccoli specifically, oxylates you see) and tap water for his stones. It just depends on which is more convenient that week. WATER GUY with meme filters who is franchisee of some scammy “wanna start your own business and be your own boss?” Company is trying to understand how the internets can help his business in 2024. So this week it’s the water. Next week he will talk to his beluga head brother out in California and begins blaming vegetables again. I mean it couldn’t be his shit genetics, sedentary lifestyle or shit diet?

 

[Quixotic Man]

That cheese gravy looks fucking foul. I guess you can't make a roux with meat flour or whatever other scam product Jack is currently shilling.
That sad broken congealed sauce is probably at least 50% fat per weight too. When he spoons it on to the plate you can see the water separating completely from the collected fats. Its like a kids science experiment.

 

[Gulls on Film]

Counterpoint: Jack was never able to make a roux.

 

[Agamemnon Busmalis]

There's a decent recipe hiding in there but what he made was fucking disgusting.

I feel the same way about Jack as a person.

 

[AltisticRight]

Can this fat lazy fuck get anything right? Is the magical wand tool in Photoshop too hard to use? Look at how horrible this stock clipart chicken is.

 

[densedance]

That cheese gravy looks fucking foul. I guess you can't make a roux with meat flour or whatever other scam product Jack is currently shilling.
That sad broken congealed sauce is probably at least 50% fat per weight too. When he spoons it on to the plate you can see the water separating completely from the collected fats. Its like a kids science experiment.

View attachment 6161161

What Jack was looking for is Sauce Mornay. It's Roux with Cheese (Swiss Cheese preferrebaly) and Eggyolk.

Also the Crust looks like dogshit. Why didn't he pan-fried it to get an even result?

 

[Falcon Sebben]

"(All American Water) are the ones that prevented by kidney stones, by filtering my water in all my house"
Mush mouth 'my water in all my house' aside what the fuck is he on about? He was getting kidney stones and he thinks drinking filtered water helped? I think just drinking water and not fizzy drinks is what did it Jack

Fatty blames the water in TN to be too hard which is why he constantly gets kidney stones. Problem is if that was the case Hendersonville would be ground zero for kidney stones as more people would be getting them. And yet... we don't see this.

You'd have to be drinking water that was loaded with minerals for this to be a problem. We're not just talking hard water, we're talking sludge. But like everything else in his life he needs to blame outside forces for his own problems which could be solved by eating properly, drinking plenty of water and exercising.

Jack alternately blames kidney stones and begetibles (broccoli specifically, oxylates you see) and tap water for his stones. It just depends on which is more convenient that week. WATER GUY with meme filters who is franchisee of some scammy “wanna start your own business and be your own boss?” Company is trying to understand how the internets can help his business in 2024. So this week it’s the water. Next week he will talk to his beluga head brother out in California and begins blaming vegetables again. I mean it couldn’t be his shit genetics, sedentary lifestyle or shit diet?

I forgot the oxalates... which could be solved by drinking more water. But no, it's easier to blame broccoli because his brother Charles is an idiot.

Counterpoint: Jack was never able to make a roux.

To be fair to Fatty, making a good roux takes a bit of practice. Ingredient wise it's simple as it's just fat and flour. But he couldn't make one because he's too lazy and it would come out lumpy and undercooked meaning it would have that "raw" flour taste to it. Or alternately he'd cook it too much.

What Jack was looking for is Sauce Mornay. It's Roux with Cheese (Swiss Cheese preferrebaly) and Eggyolk.

While you could add an egg yolk to possibly thicken it up, the classic Mornay sauce doesn't use one. It's basically a Bechamel sauce with cheese and the classic way to make one is to use scalded milk that has been flavored with half an onion, some cloves and a bay leaf.

What Fatty made was... something nasty.

 

[densedance]

What Fatty made was... something nasty.

Imagine he actually attempted it.

"Don't worry goooys, those big chunks of scrambled Eggs isn't that bad"

 

[Tiresome]

To be fair to Fatty, making a good roux takes a bit of practice

Not really. If you can make Kraft Dinner, you can make a roux.

 

[Fascist Frederick]

Not really. If you can make Kraft Dinner, you can make a roux.

Jack couldn't even open the box for a Kraft dinner.

 

[p1138]

Not really. If you can make Kraft Dinner, you can make a roux.

I've seen people fuck that up too, but yeah there's people who just cannot make a roux and it's usually a lack of patience...(which is how it ends up lumpy, undercooked, or burnt from running the stove full blast and not stirring) which is something Fatty is absolutely known for in the kitchen.

 

[Falcon Sebben]

Not really. If you can make Kraft Dinner, you can make a roux.

Yeah and Fatty can't even do that right so I rest my case. Besides it might be cooking 101 but I've seen people fuck it up.

I've seen people fuck that up too, but yeah there's people who just cannot make a roux and it's usually a lack of patience...(which is how it ends up lumpy, undercooked, or burnt from running the stove full blast and not stirring) which is something Fatty is absolutely known for in the kitchen.

This right here is what I'm talking about.

And if you're using said roux as the base to a sauce to thicken it up it's even worse. That's when you get the large clumps of unblended flour.

 

[p1138]

Yeah and Fatty can't even do that right so I rest my case. Besides it might be cooking 101 but I've seen people fuck it up.


This right here is what I'm talking about.

And if you're using said roux as the base to a sauce to thicken it up it's even worse. That's when you get the large clumps of unblended flour.

There's another way to fuck it up and I still do this on occasion if I'm not paying attention or following a strict recipe(then again I'm also not pretending to be a chef teaching people how to do anything). Too much or too little roux. Too little, you can just cheat it at the end with a little bit of corn starch slurry, it's not a great option but it can save it so long as you understand how corn starch works as a thickener. Too much roux... yeah you're SOL unless you want to make whatever it is you're doing into a bigger batch or whatever(which if you only got enough of some key ingredients to make the amount you made.. oh well).

 

[Bassomatic]

That cheese gravy looks fucking foul. I guess you can't make a roux with meat flour or whatever other scam product Jack is currently shilling.
That sad broken congealed sauce is probably at least 50% fat per weight too. When he spoons it on to the plate you can see the water separating completely from the collected fats. Its like a kids science experiment.

View attachment 6161161

I'll take things my dog won't eat for 200 Alex.

 

[desudesu]

Fatty's latest livestream where he spent half an hour absolutely raging on the moon landing conspiracy, COVID-19 and politics:

A couple of gems in the video where we see Junior being fat (in the screenshots below), Jr raging at the dogs, and Jack threatening to "throw the dog out":

 

[._.]

Jack is legit retarded if he thinks gamey has a metal taste and that soaking liver or venison in water removes the blood. It removes the myoglobin. What makes wild meat gamey is that the wild animal has a different diet and is usually tougher because the animal gets way more exercise when it's wild. Our domesticated animals eat a diet which makes them taste better and they don't need to run from predators or go distances to get their food so they get less exercise. Less exercise = more tender meat. Gamey meat doesn't even taste like metal, it tastes more strong for lack of better words

Considering he doesnt cook his food all the way he probably is tasting 'metal', hes just tasting the raw blood pouring out of the half cooked meat and going 'oh it tastes like iron. Is that what 'gamey' is?

What Jack was looking for is Sauce Mornay. It's Roux with Cheese (Swiss Cheese preferrebaly) and Eggyolk.

This seems like something where 'greyre' would be used but he would throw in slices of deli swiss and go 'its kinda hard to get it right guys'.

Fatty's latest livestream where he spent half an hour absolutely raging on the moon landing conspiracy, COVID-19 and politics:

A couple of gems in the video where we see Junior being fat (in the screenshots below), Jr raging at the dogs, and Jack threatening to "throw the dog out":
View attachment 6163270
View attachment 6163273
View attachment 6163275

oh my fucking god
This is the guy whos calling you a nigger on fortnite.
the oakley blades, im fucking dying.

The bottom photo alone is like a renaissance composition, my mind is fucking swimming!!! Jr in the cuck corner popping in for another G fuel and the absolute LOOK Jack is giving him holy shit.