Nicholas Robert Rekieta / Rekieta "Law" / Actually Criminal / @NickRekieta - Polysubstance enthusiast, "Lawtuber" turned Dabbleverse streamer, swinger, "whitebread ass nigga", snuffs animals for fun, visits 🇯🇲 BBC resorts. Legally a cuckold who lost his license to practice law. Wife's bod worth $50. The normies even know.

[Harm]

Kayla kinda resembles a coked out squirrel.

That's good enough for me! The facts don't lie, folks. Nick Rekieta has always loved raping squirrels.

 

[Mourning_Cloak]

Who is more corpulent: Patrick Tomlinson or Robert Barnes, esq.?

 

[Schpoots]

The whole Barnes vs Jewsh situation seems kind of sussy to me. Barnes only started being a dick to Josh once the Rekieta stuff started. And Barnes is washing Rekietas balls so aggressively that he might as well be his acting lawyer. Feels like Barnes is being used as an attack dog to damage Joshes/kiwifarms reputation at the behest of Rekieta. They're both lawyers and know shit talking a client isn't acceptable so I have no choice but to assume its intentional and that a bar complaint / lawsuit is desired. My theory is that Rekieta wants a lawsuit to happen because theres something he can get from Josh, such as the removal of his thread in exchange for settling the suit to stop bleeding Josh dry. Rekieta was definietly trying to out-money Monte so I don't see why he woulden't do it again. He would probally try to press the issue that court documents are being leaked here as an attack vector. Or maybe Barnes is just a fat retard and this is just another theory. A skitzo theory.

 

[AnOminous]

Or maybe Barnes is just a fat retard and this is just another theory. A skitzo theory.

Barnes is just a fat retard.

 

[Schpoots]

My skitzo theories will come true some day, bro.

 

[Strix454]

I thought Null mentioned why he’s going for the body cam footage when hr first announced the mission: to see the condition of Nick’s house. And Nick can just consent to the footage being released.

In terms of public relations, the release of the body came footage is very much in Nick's own interests. I suspect what is in the footage will never live up to what people imagine is in the footage. If the house is not in as bad shape as people expect and the state of things is not as bad as they expect, that would only tend to help the public view of him and his case.

But Nick doesn't see it that way. Firstly he sees Null and the farms as enemies not to be cooperated with even if it helps himself. Secondly, Nick thinks the best way to deal with the public about his situation is to lie and gaslight them. To teach them that anything that comes from the state and the evil police cannot be trusted. That the only thing to trust in is what Nick himself says.

Nick's current belief overall is that the public should not be given any information about his case that isn't controlled by him and presented according to his narrative that he never used drugs and that everything with his kids was totally fine before the arrest. He is not going to change his mind on that point.

 

[AnOminous]

If the house is not in as bad shape as people expect and the state of things is not as bad as they expect, that would only tend to help the public view of him and his case.

Unless it's literally something from an episode of Hoarders it isn't going to live up to the expectations of this thread.

I think it's more likely it's just a mess, like we would expect, but not some kind of horror show. That almost makes it funny Nick refuses to consent to its release. I seriously doubt it's as bad as people are expecting, despite the police explanations, which strike me as really similar to how every single DUI police affidavit reports "bloodshot eyes" or "an odor of marijuana," literally every time even if there was no weed at all found.

Anyway, I don't expect a Hoarders hive. I do expect it to be a bit shitty, though.

 

[Sharpeteer]

Unless it's literally something from an episode of Hoarders it isn't going to live up to the expectations of this thread.

I think it's more likely it's just a mess, like we would expect, but not some kind of horror show. That almost makes it funny Nick refuses to consent to its release. I seriously doubt it's as bad as people are expecting, despite the police explanations, which strike me as really similar to how every single DUI police affidavit reports "bloodshot eyes" or "an odor of marijuana," literally every time even if there was no weed at all found.

Anyway, I don't expect a Hoarders hive. I do expect it to be a bit shitty, though.

I agree that it probably won't be the worst thing we've ever seen.

All I really want is a confirmation that the drugs are there, on film.

 

[Dumbledore's Onlyfans]

I hope they opened up all the cupboards to show that all the Rekieta kids have to eat is green olives, canned corn, and a sticky bottle of grenadine.

 

[AnOminous]

All I really want is a confirmation that the drugs are there, on film.

The one thing I'm pretty sure we're going to see is 26 grams of cocaine.

 

[macrodegenerate]

sticky bottle of grenadine.

I never took Nick to be a tequila enjoyer.

 

[Dumpster dived waifu]

The one thing I'm pretty sure we're going to see is 26 grams of cocaine.

You fool, you think the bodycams were designed to see through the thick haze of coke, liquor fumes and balldo sweat? Just imagine you rubbed a thick globule of vaseline on your eyes, that's all we'll see.

 

[Darkholme's Dungeon]

That almost makes it funny Nick refuses to consent to its release. I seriously doubt it's as bad as people are expecting, despite the police explanations, which strike me as really similar to how every single DUI police affidavit reports "bloodshot eyes" or "an odor of marijuana," literally every time even if there was no weed at all found.

You say that. But the harder Nick fights it, the more bad it gets in the minds of people and the funnier it is when it comes out.

We could call it "the Monty Standard" since it's the legal and personal standard Nick has set out for Montagraph. "prove you didn't rape all those theoretical boys Montagraph"

I'd jokingly call that the British (Flying Circus) standard since burden is on the defense across the pond, but that's so absurd it won't even fly in the UK unless if it was a homosexual transgender Muslim accusing you.

Look, I get it. Legal practice is hard. It isn't hugely glamorous. You aren't likely to get troons like MANdy flocking around your cock if you're just a common garden lawyer. But despite how disreputable it is as a profession, it's still a hundred times more respectable than being a performing YouTube monkey.

You snort sixteen lines, and what do you get? Another day older and deeper in debt...

One thing that Barnes forgets is that he's an ostensible legal expert. I know per se defamation exists, but if I went out and said that random Joe was a "child molesting satanic serial killer who diddles little boys and sings Horst-Wessel lied daily while lynching black men faster than Nick snorts 8balls" I don't think anyone reasonable would take me seriously as a random nigger on the internet.
If I was a glow specializing in character assassinations or Chris Hansen that might be a little different.

 

[Tiny Chinaman]

You fool, you think the bodycams were designed to see through the thick haze of coke, liquor fumes and balldo sweat? Just imagine you rubbed a thick globule of vaseline on your eyes, that's all we'll see.

You wont be able to see past all of the neglect and shame

 

[Owlbear]

All I really want is a confirmation that the drugs are there, on film.

All I want is a count of how many balldos he has. Seeing the mountain of drugs would be nice too.

 

[LifeAlert]

View attachment 6202732
(Credit to @elb for the clip)

This fat bastard is threatening legal action against Josh because Josh is "lying" about him. What lie dumb motherfucker? You said we wanted to publish the bodycam footage because this site is full of sick and disgusting people (implying we want to prey on the kids) and later changed your story to "I only wanted to warn Kiwi Farms about the publishing of the bodycam footage":

View attachment 6202764

Fuck this bald gay faggot. Hey Barnes, if you're reading this, you're a nigger. Take Nick's crusty balldo and shove it up your ass.

 

[Angry Crustacean]

The one thing I'm pretty sure we're going to see is 26 grams of cocaine.

But how many liquor bottles? I think we have good odds for over a hundred if including empty bottles.

 

[AnOminous]

One thing that Barnes forgets is that he's an ostensible legal expert.

He is an expert in lots of things. He sucks goat dicks. He sucks pig dicks. He sucks dog dicks. He sucks many different kinds of dicks! Just saying.

 

[Long-time Lurker]

Qayla? Barnes could roleplay as the Grand Nagus, she could be the dabo girl, and they could LARP as guests at a Betazoid wedding. Oh shit. I need a lobotomy. That was entirely too much Trek that I recalled.

> by Mike Stoklasas Spock Ears
User name checks out.

That reminds me: the Ferengi (the big eared people who live and die by greed) were accused of being a caricature of Jews. The writers responded that they were supposed to be a parody of Americans. Remind me, (((who))) runs America? It's on the tip of my tongue.

---

As for Nick's comments about "fat lumpy retards" who "don't understand how Minnesota law works". (That comment is rich coming from "this was never a law channel".)

At surface level, Nick's statements do sound correct with regards to the strict timeline and CPS making contingency plans. However, he wouldn't need to file a "gimme mah keedz back" motion or a "suppress this test" motion if CPS thought he was following his case plan.

I still have a lot of reading to do, so I will try to limit speculation. I do appreciate his encouragement to dive in and learn the law. I want to see if a layman can be more correct than a bottom-tier lawyer. Fortunately I don't see much indication that I'll be stymied by parts of the law being hidden (i.e. common law).

 

[Friend of Dorothy Parker]

Nick's current belief overall is that the public no one should not be given any information about his case that isn't controlled by him and presented according to his narrative that he never used drugs and that everything with his kids was totally fine before the arrest. He is not going to change his mind on that point.