Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

[Kosher Salt]

I want to see Jack recreate homemade snacks and see how badly he fucks that up. Like homemade pop tarts, Cheetos, cheez it’s, etc

He should make jerky, it'd be right up his alley. Granted he probably couldn't chew it and describe how he can really taste the {ingredient} but there's always Jr for that.

He could even make it spicy so Tammy can't enjoy it.

Is there a single thing Jack espouses or prescribes that doesn't blatantly come from him doing the opposite and thinking it's a secret?

Eat before you eat.

 

[Falcon Sebben]

Not to disagree, but I think Jack recognizes perfectly well that anything he interacts with or is forced to consider reflects poorly upon himself. He palpably struggles to understand anything more complicated than eating, and his inferiority complex is extreme enough that he can be trusted to misrepresent anything once he has the notion that lying will somehow make him seem more excellent.

We've seen Jack point to his own cooking and insist it's great, despite everyone being able to see that it's so bad as to be unbelievable. We've also seen him point to food he cooked and insist that it's somehow someone else's fault. That isn't an absence of self-reflection - It's someone who can't bear to see himself reflected accurately, even when insisting on inflicting himself upon others.

Even prior to having all those strokes, most of Jack's brain power seemed tied up in convincing himself that he could persuade others to believe that someone else had shit in his pants.

The difference is, Fatty actually believes he's a good cook because he's a glutton who eats undercooked chicken and thinks it's perfectly done.

He doesn't have the brain power, or the ability to step outside himself, to look at his food critically. And then he doesn't understand the recipe itself and just adds what he thinks works or that he succeeded when he actually failed.

When he made Yorkshire Pudding he wound up with hockey pucks and thought they were perfect.
When he made Pho he didn't understand the difference between star anise and just plain anise. Also he cut the meat into really thick slices while saying they were cut thin.
When he made some German sauerkraut dish he couldn't find juniper berries and used blueberries instead.
When he made a one pot spaghetti dish where you place everything including the tomatoes into the water as the pasta cooks you're supposed to reduce the water until it becomes part of the sauce. He just ate watery pasta with a hint of tomato and basil.

Fatty has no idea what he's doing in the kitchen but still thinks he had what was necessary to be a star on the Food Network.

 

[Tiresome]

With lolcows, never ascribe to self-delusion what can be explained by pure stupidity.

 

[The Feline Solution]

View attachment 6214727View attachment 6214727

lol skillet. Of course this fat retard wants to tell the world he really appreciates skillet

Nice headphones retard. Fucking beluga head here streamed on mute for 7 mins then rage deleted it in DFE moment. If you want to look cool get AirPods Max. These look like you lost a bet

It's like Jack is working extra hard on looking the most retarded he can. Legit Special Needs in those pics.

You could say that about every aspect of cooking. Despite being a YouTube cook for a decade and a half, he still can't throughly cook something through, properly measure out ingredients, come up with recipes where the ingredients actually go together and properly use any of the tools he has at his disposal.

The guy randomly picked a trade to as a vehicle to pursue success and has yet to demonstrate having any skill at any aspect of it. He should be thankful that he choose something less harmful such as cooking rather than something like wood working or another form of craftsmanship. He probably would have cut a part of his body off by this point.

He's like many cows in this regard, normal people who are doing the same tasks over and over again naturally improve over time but then again normal people are also capable of noticing the errors they make and don't have the can-do-no-wrong cunt attitude that Jack puts on display in abundance.

 

[Hungry Homeless Handjob]

With lolcows, never ascribe to self-delusion what can be explained by pure stupidity.

Jack is a stupid person which means minimal metacognitive ability. He doesn’t try and deceive others because knowing how his words impact what others think is too much work for his brain. He also can’t learn from his mistakes since that takes an understanding of how what he’s doing is different from what’s correct. Jack’s brain, much like his massive gut, is smooth as a bowling ball and is best used for knocking things over.

 

[Doctor of Autism]

He doesn’t try and deceive others because knowing how his words impact what others think is too much work for his brain.

I’ll stop you right there. Jack tries to deceive other people about his diets but it’s just that he’s too stupid to be competent at lying to people.

 

[Marc]

That's what I was speaking to, before: Though Jack may be too stupid to lie effectively, he seems to take every opportunity to lie that he is capable of recognizing. I'll go so far as to say he still attempts to misrepresent his ability to stand or walk by insisting on being filmed hunched over his kitchen islands like FDR in his leg braces (with the wheelchair or scooter handles sometimes visible in frame).

 

[densedance]

When he made some German sauerkraut dish he couldn't find juniper berries and used blueberries instead.

lmfao how did I miss that? How can you fuck that up?

 

[a terminal posture]

lmfao how did I miss that? How can you fuck that up?

6 juniper berries, crushed (I used blueberries because I couldn't find juniper berries) because he was looking in the produce section.

Later on he almost had something like a critical thought but does he ever think to spent 1 minute and just google 'juniper berry'? Nope.

 

[GDarBee]

Nicest guy on YouTube...

 

[Andoxico]

For some reason Jack saw fit to give us a numbers update for the first time in like 2 months

 

[Kosher Salt]

For some reason Jack saw fit to give us a numbers update for the first time in like 2 months
View attachment 6227470

Really, we are supposed to believe that after 2 1/2 months plateaued at 259 pounds he's suddenly shed 14 pounds in a month?

 

[p1138]

Really, we are supposed to believe that after 2 1/2 months plateaued at 259 pounds he's suddenly shed 14 pounds in a month?

LOL, yep totally lost 14 pounds in a month and his BP isn't high at all, that's "normal" lol. Of course for him that may very well be a normal BP, but his concept of normal doesn't match reality.

 

[Super Hans v2]

Really, we are supposed to believe that after 2 1/2 months plateaued at 259 pounds he's suddenly shed 14 pounds in a month?

Jack weighed himself right after TamHam drove him to Jr's shoe warehouse for his weekly shit, so Jr can clean the shitter afterward for old time's sake.

 

[Kuritan Deplorable]

Really, we are supposed to believe that after 2 1/2 months plateaued at 259 pounds he's suddenly shed 14 pounds in a month?

Maybe one of the feet finally fell off

 

[Agamemnon Busmalis]

Really, we are supposed to believe that after 2 1/2 months plateaued at 259 pounds he's suddenly shed 14 pounds in a month?

Must have finally took that meat shit. Like a log of baloney...

 

[Bassomatic]

Really, we are supposed to believe that after 2 1/2 months plateaued at 259 pounds he's suddenly shed 14 pounds in a month?

Dumb people lying will never not be funny.

 

[Falcon Sebben]

lmfao how did I miss that? How can you fuck that up?

Well they kinda look the same if you don't think about it.

But the best thing he could have done, other than maybe look for them, is to see online what can he use instead of juniper berries? The answer is fresh rosemary and a touch of lemon juice, a touch of black cardamom or even caraway seeds. None of them will have the same taste but they all have some aspect of juniper in them. Or hell. Add a splash of gin.

For some reason Jack saw fit to give us a numbers update for the first time in like 2 months
View attachment 6227470

150 BP is NOT normal. That's hypertension. And I would guess the numbers are absolute bullshit.

Really, we are supposed to believe that after 2 1/2 months plateaued at 259 pounds he's suddenly shed 14 pounds in a month?

That's what a plateau is MOM! You stop losing weight for weeks or months at a time then start up again! You're so negagive.

But yeah. He's totally lying about his numbers. And the fact he's eating carbs and the occasional vegetable on the side.

 

[Neko GF]

THE GOAT, MT JULIET, TN​

(07/24/24)

Original:

Preserve Tube: https://preservetube.com/watch?v=nTtq8LDDVOk

Spoiler: Archive (720p):

 

[densedance]

THE GOAT, MT JULIET, TN​

(07/24/24)

Original:

Archive Processing...

No fucking way these two alone at all those heavy caloric stuff on their own.