🐷 Ethan Ralph's Twitter / Tweets - A collection of thoughts, insights and musings from the internet's favorite gunted hobbit

[Mr E. Grifter]

Place your bets Kiwis!
10:1 rolled by locals
25:1 lost wallet/phone in taxi
40:1 blacklisted by airlines

He posted DMs he sent to Aeromexico on Twitter - unread, unanswered, obviously - where he said he had initiated a charge back for his flights, whilst demanding they honour the return flights. He basically was trying to threaten them.

While I am 99% sure whatever happened on his outbound journey was his fault, even if it wasn't, you claim your money back after the fact via customer services - and whatever escalation mechanisms Mexico has (good luck I guess).

Cancelling payment when they get the ultimate say on who can board is dumb beyond measure. Ralph really cannot help himself.

 

[Asian tech support]

Stranded in Tijuana? Nigga, you white. Just walk across the border and get a cab. It's been a long time since I've been to the border there but honest to God if you're white and sound like a retarded American, they don't give a shit, passport or not.

 

[Dixieland Buckaroo]

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At this rate, gringo gonna end up in some low grade street tacos.

 

[UCantCCPMe]

Liveleak, rotten, ogrish are all gone - where do I go to see Ralph chainsawed by the cartel?

https://theralphretort.com

Ralph will tell you all about it in his newest bpd Mary Sue gay emo fanfic

 

[Obnoxious Asshole]

Hahahahahahahahahahaha
Piggy couldn’t waddle his quad titties to the airport on time. FIVE BAR DAYS!

 

[Don'tAnalizeMeBro!]

Ralph probably got behind on it, too, and started just destroying it. Wasn't it "at the shop" for like six months? Shortly after he admittedly ran over a median or guardrail at an airport, because he was dumb or drunk (or both) and was going the wrong way? His credit was already shit going into that lease/purchase, but I don't know if he could even qualify for financing on a shack in a swamp at this point, and he has no other assets.

IIRC EOR ran over the meridian at the airport in Cancun because he was in the wrong place and someone yelled the magical word “POLICIA! POLICIA!“.

Wasn’t there also a tale of EOR somehow getting one of those concrete barriers caught under the truck and being dragged for a while en route to that Cancun disaster?

 

[Blue Miaplacidus]

He probably spent all of adolwulf and guitar anthony's allowance on TJ hookers and now needs a reup to get back home.

 

[Telemeter]

Reminder that it's Vickers's fault that this drunk fatso that gets regularly thrown off planes is now a recurring presence in his grandson's life

Despite how cringe Vickers, is, i can't never really bring myself to hate him cause

1. His family did get wronged by Ralph
2. He's made Ralph SUFFAH in such funny ways, LOL. Remember the reason Ralph fled to Mexico is to run away from Vickers in the first place.

 

[Mr. Manchester]

Despite how cringe Vickers, is, i can't never really bring myself to hate him cause

1. His family did get wronged by Ralph
2. He's made Ralph SUFFAH in such funny ways, LOL. Remember the reason Ralph fled to Mexico is to run away from Vickers in the first place.

Although I definitely understand the intense desire for revenge against Ralph from Vickers, he acted like a dipshit constantly. That's why when Harry entered the scene he acted like a normal enraged father/grandfather and is way better at tormenting Ralph. Imagine if Vickers just immediately started with the silent treatment instead of having people come on the farms and hint at, "SUPER TOP SECRET INFORMATION YOU GUYS BUT YOU HAVE TO WAIT". Ralph loves conflict but nothing makes him seethe like being completely ignored.

I'm also positive that he ran away to Mexico because he raped Alice and didn't want to catch a charge, but Vickers serving him with papers constantly was pretty funny.

 

[LiquidChrisRespecter]

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YESH
YESH
WE NEED MO'

 

[Automaton Type 2B]

Uh oh...

 

[Um...]

Tijuana is basically the slums of San Diego. Lots of crime and gang activity, unsafe to be on the streets after dark. Not a good place for a drunken trainwreck like Ethan Ralph to be ‘stranded’ in.

 

[Cucktry Roads]

Tijuana is basically the slums of San Diego. Lots of crime and gang activity, unsafe to be on the streets after dark. Not a good place for a drunken trainwreck like Ethan Ralph to be ‘stranded’ in.

They're not gonna do anything. Mexicans fear the El Guntocabra, the cryptid fat, midget pigmonster that wanders the streets late and night, pilled out and digging through the garbage for burgers and tortas.

 

[Obnoxious Asshole]

Ralph is in very real danger of Xannie withdrawals in the streets of Tijuana. He might end up on liveleak fishing out in the airport. So many possibilities....

pigmonster that wanders the streets late and night, pilled out and digging through the garbage for burgers and tortas.

It's Tijuana. Ralph might get really lucky and find a trash whore. She can consent as long as rigor has not set in.

 

[Mr E. Grifter]

Despite how cringe Vickers, is, i can't never really bring myself to hate him cause

1. His family did get wronged by Ralph
2. He's made Ralph SUFFAH in such funny ways, LOL. Remember the reason Ralph fled to Mexico is to run away from Vickers in the first place.

There is certainly some degree of sympathy for Vickers, but he's a retarded spastic who used the fact his daughter got creampied and impregnated by Ralph for clout.

Not only that, despite pretending he's rich, he's a profligate who has bankrupted his family with 365 day Disney access, buying strangers PS5s and frivolous law suits.

Compare and contrast to Harry Morris, he has never even threatened legal action, and yet has Ralph seething constantly just by Tweeting out something funny on occasion. That's how it should be done.

 

[Null]

Uh oh...

MUSH !!! MUSH !!!

 

[AnOminous]

El Chapo...forget about it.

El Cerdo Gordo.

His credit was already shit going into that lease/purchase, but I don't know if he could even qualify for financing on a shack in a swamp at this point, and he has no other assets.

He could probably get scammed by one of those "rent to own" outlets that "sell" you a car and if you miss a payment, you either pay it plus late fees or they come, take it back, and "sell" it to another retard.

Tijuana is basically the slums of San Diego. Lots of crime and gang activity, unsafe to be on the streets after dark. Not a good place for a drunken trainwreck like Ethan Ralph to be ‘stranded’ in.

A drunk, fat, stupid American faggot like Ralph, carrying some gay man purse, would basically have "fresh meat" tattooed on him.

 

[Friedchickenfan]

Stranded in Tijuana? Nigga, you white. Just walk across the border and get a cab. It's been a long time since I've been to the border there but honest to God if you're white and sound like a retarded American, they don't give a shit, passport or not.

Man has so much Xanax in his bloodstream he probably forgot he could.

 

[Mr. Manchester]

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"Too much embarrassing to even explain."

FTFY Ralph

 

[JohnnyGringo]

Place your bets Kiwis!
10:1 rolled by locals
25:1 lost wallet/phone in taxi
40:1 blacklisted by airlines

Something tells me he left his wallet in a brothel

EDIT Explanation: While prostitution is technically illegal in Mexico, in Tijuana and other areas, the police look the other way. There is this one famous strip club/brothel that pops up amongst Mexicans called "Hong Kong Gentlemen's Club".