I could use some help from the ladies on here. For me, I will feel I have successfully transitioned to living as a woman when two things are true:
1. I consistently see myself as a woman
2. I feel that others, especially women, consistently see me as a woman.
In this post I'm asking for help on #2. As a younger person living as male at the time, I saw activities/spaces that to me were the pinnacle of being a woman, such as being a bridesmaid. I am old enough now that activities like that are few and far between, and women tend to invite their longtime friends/family for those sorts of roles. So while I suspect that if I were to be a bridesmaid it would be the ultimate feeling of female inclusion, my partner has pointed out that if I'm waiting for a big thing like that, I could be waiting a long time.
At the same time, I find that people using my new name and pronouns, while appreciated, to my brain just feels like they are being polite, and doesn't actually trigger feelings of affirmation. I think I need more active acts of acceptance to convince myself it's real.
I am actively working on making and nurturing friendships with other women. I don't want to be needy and say "please invite me on your girl's weekend" or to your clothing swap or whatever, although I hope eventually I make good enough friends for that to happen.
In the meantime, this is my ask: what sorts of smaller things do you gals do, or situations you put yourself in, that make you feel accepted as a woman?
SerenfechGras 1 point 10 hours ago*
Three years into medical transition (and post-FFS) I still don’t. Maybe the gatekeepers of old were on to something important - saving us from loneliness that will end in the same place. Other women routinely clock me within earshot, or laugh nervously when I talk (I’ve worked hard at voice training).