Culture Your Table Is Ready. The Clock Is Ticking. - Restaurants are enforcing some strict time limits — whether or not dinner is finished.

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By Megan Krigbaum
7:00 A.M.

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Illustration: Kate Dehler

Earlier this summer, I met up with friends at the latest restaurant-that’s-more-like-a-bar on the Lower East Side. As they handed out our menus, our server reminded us with a tone of gentle but unwavering conviction: We needed to be out in 90 minutes. We raced through dinner — cocktails, a dozen plates to share — and in the end had time left over. (We ordered a bottle of wine to max out our minutes.)

I’d seen what happens to diners who blow their deadlines. Tables had been getting the pink slip in Brooklyn a few weeks before at an otherwise-cozy spot in Fort Greene. I was seated next to a couple still picking at the bones of their whole fish when a manager asked whether they planned on staying for dessert. “We’re going to need this table back shortly,” she said. Off in a corner, a three-top got the boot during their last round of drinks.

For as long as anyone can remember, servers have nudged New Yorkers along, faux-casually asking “Can I get you anything else?” and dropping checks as soon as customers set down their spoons. Now they’re being more blunt about it: Firm time limits are presented on reservation apps (Bar Contra, which opened this month, states on its OpenTable page, “Your reservation will grant you 90 minutes in one of our tables”), they’re mentioned at host stands, and they’re openly reiterated whenever diners get a little too comfortable after the crème brûlée is cleared.

Everyone has had the experience of walking into a restaurant without a reservation and discovering that, yes, there’s a table available but the restaurant will need it back at a certain time for someone with a reservation. That’s easier to stomach than being told the table you’ve reserved well in advance nevertheless comes with a stopwatch.

Many in the industry, I discovered, still aren’t quite ready to talk about it on the record (one person called it “a nuanced dance,” another asked to be kept anonymous after we’d spoken). Practitioners of this movement — which include, among others, the Four Horsemen, Atoboy, Coqodaq, Eel Bar — are a particular style of restaurant that is casual in premise but run with the rigidity of a fine-dining establishment. They have an impressive choreography to their service to ensure they flip each table every hour and a half, seating the entire dining room three times per night. “If we don’t get those three turns, we don’t stay in business,” says Guy Gladstein, a managing partner at Figure Eight in the West Village. The 50-seat spot has an average guest check of around $65, Gladstein tells me. “That last turn is what’s keeping us going,” he says. (There, tables of one-to-three people are capped at 90 minutes; four or more people get two hours.)

Restaurant technology is such that streamlining and tracing the clockwork is possible via Resy and the point-of-sale system Toast, but the job of making sure groups actually leave still comes down to staff members. “A masterful server is dictating the pace without the guest feeling it,” says Amanda McMillan, general manager of the Four Horsemen. There isn’t much wiggle room: Everyone has to show up on time and order within a few minutes of sitting down. The kitchen can’t hit any snags that delay the dishes, and a warm bottle of Chablis can’t go into an ice bucket for 15 minutes to chill before it’s poured. “If there is a strict timeline that must be adhered to,” McMillan says, “it’s the restaurant’s job to manage that — if the restaurant can’t hit the mark of 90 minutes gracefully, that is on them.”

Of course, if the restaurant does its job and diners still don’t get the hint, less subtle tactics may be required. Gracefully convincing people to vacate a table requires quite a bit of skill, and with the perception that restaurants are pricier than ever, it becomes more difficult. At the Four Horsemen, if a table orders extra wine or just runs long, the servers negotiate with the host to stretch time or move the party to the bar or to Nightmoves, its sister spot next door. No matter what, the restaurant needs its two-tops back after two hours max. “That’s how long,” McMillan says, “it reasonably takes to have a nice dinner with us.”

Source (Archive)
 
Go ahead, try it faggots. I'll make you call the fucking cops and then I won't pay the bill. If you want to min/max this crap, I will never spend money there again. Go ahead you ass holes, kill the restaurant industry. Do it. I fucking dare you. Oh, you think I'll tip after you boot me from my table? You're adorable.
 
During covid we had things like:

"Eating indoors is unsafe, so we will put seating outdoors and cover it so the outdoors indoors in the middle of sidewalk traffic is fine."

"Mask back on between courses."

"Menus are unsafe, use this QR code that doesn't work."

"SHOW ME YOUR PAPERS, CHUD! NO VAX NO SERVICE!"

That put most of us off going to most restaurants. Just in case anyone was still going, they've now instituted strict eating time limits. Sounds smart.
 
Go ahead, try it faggots. I'll make you call the fucking cops and then I won't pay the bill. If you want to min/max this crap, I will never spend money there again. Go ahead you ass holes, kill the restaurant industry. Do it. I fucking dare you. Oh, you think I'll tip after you boot me from my table? You're adorable.
Absolutely. The first thought I had from reading the title was, "Well I guess I'll go somewhere else then".
 
I curse upon thee a thousand white woman who complain about their perfectly cooked food and send it back 3 times before leaving a 0$ tip and demanding their meal be comped.
 
With the economy being what is is you would figure bars and restaurants wouldn't go out of their way to be massive cunts to their own customers yet here we are.

Enjoy your one cent tip retards.
 
Cook at home. You can sit at the table as long as you like while you enjoy your cheaper food without having to go out. No reservation, no waiting for a faggy waiter to serve you food.
 
Reminder: (((they))) want you to live in le 15-minute walkable cities with the population density of NYC where every place will be like this. So you'll just take the 15 minute walk back to your pod and doordash drinks and dessert there. You pay the extra 20% rent surcharge to be allocated a pod near your buddies and all is well.
 
There are occasional times when I am glad to be a poorfag and this is one of those times.

Or maybe the Bay Area is just better about shit than NYC.

I've never made a reservation, I've only had to wait for a table for longer than 20 minutes like 3 times in my life, and if someone tried to hustle me out the door like this I would leave a stinker of a Yelp review.
 
One of the restaurants mentioned in the article, Coqodaq, serves a bucket of KFC for $38:
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Calling it a bucket is also generous as there is a very high false bottom:
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They also sell McNuggets for $3.50 a piece:
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or $16-$28 if you want fish eggs on top:
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or $30 if you'd prefer truffles instead of caviar:
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Reminder that this is for a SINGLE CHICKEN NUGGET.

You're not missing out on much if you refuse to patronize them.
 
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Ask for condiments, then write a stern criticism in cursive and ketchup. My displeasure will be legendary and viral.
 
that companies are feeling so pressured to get more dollars in the door indicate that the already narrow margin of profit for restaraunts is shrinking. the american economy has never been better btw
 
One of the restaurants mentioned in the article, Coqodaq, serves a bucket of KFC for $38:
View attachment 6303864

McNuggets costs $3.50 each:
View attachment 6303868
or $16-$28 if you want fish eggs and gold leaf on top:
View attachment 6303874
or $30 if you'd prefer truffles instead of caviar:
View attachment 6303873

Reminder that this is for a SINGLE CHICKEN NGUGGET.

You're not missing much if you refuse to patronize them.
Who exactly is the market for this? Someone willing to spend this much money on a dinner is far better off going to an actual high-end restaurant, someone that likes chicken nuggets can get them in a regular fast food place, like KFC or Popeyes, and someone who has enough money for them to not care about these prices is rich enough to hire a personal chef
 
A dinner date recently wound up costing me about $130 last weekend with tip. It really destroys my mood and ruins the entire experience. Haven't run into this yet, but if I did, I'd just walk out. Fuck this. Let the entire industry burn to the fucking ground. You can't even feel bad for the waitstaff and whatnot, they don't get paid enough to give a fuck and I'm paying too much to enjoy it.

Seriously, pre-chinavirus, restaurants were decent. I go through my old receipts from business trips and wonder how the hell everything costs what it does now. Moreover, most people are cattle and don't care. Can't wait for November. It won't change anything, but either way, people are going to go insane and there's a lot of pent up hate and discontent to go around.
 
Who exactly is the market for this? Someone willing to spend this much money on a dinner is far better off going to an actual high-end restaurant, someone that likes chicken nuggets can get them in a regular fast food place, like KFC or Popeyes, and someone who has enough money for them to not care about these prices is rich enough to hire a personal chef
Ah, but they are high end. They're in the Michelin Guide (archive):
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