Owls Owls Owls
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Feb 1, 2022
"I am so mentally ill that wearing clothes is too much for me. And yet my parents won't let me mutilate myself. The assholes. Also I'm going bald."
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Oh no, someone called me by the name I've been called since the day I was born and now my day is ruined.
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Man realizes he will never be a woman.
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Forcing a trans teenager to go through the wrong puberty when they clearly had the option to prevent it is the same as forcing hormones into a cis kid and forcefully transitioning them.
It's not fair, I thought I'd be one of the lucky people who managed to transition before age 18 but...not the case unfortunately, I managed to go on estrogen for one year and successfully hid everything until I was caught, and ever since then my family doesn't trust me at all and refuses to give me money out of fear that I might try going on estrogen again.
I wont finish high school till I'm 19 and am incapable of becoming financially independent due to several life-long mental problems that prevent me from doing basic tasks (such as getting out of bed, or putting on a shirt, or getting a glass of water), I hope the balding process is slow and that I'll be okay when I'm 19 unlike my father who lost 1/4th of his hair at age 18.
The only way I can cheer myself up with is my online characters that I wish I could be but I know I never will be, and no I do not want hugboxxing saying that I can "be pretty", most people are repulsed by how I look for unchangeable reasons I will not disclose.
I've been confident in my trans identity since age 12, I wish I tried harder in hiding my hormones, I'm so full of regret.
I just don't know what to do...please someone cheer me up in some realistic way.
It's not fair, I thought I'd be one of the lucky people who managed to transition before age 18 but...not the case unfortunately, I managed to go on estrogen for one year and successfully hid everything until I was caught, and ever since then my family doesn't trust me at all and refuses to give me money out of fear that I might try going on estrogen again.
I wont finish high school till I'm 19 and am incapable of becoming financially independent due to several life-long mental problems that prevent me from doing basic tasks (such as getting out of bed, or putting on a shirt, or getting a glass of water), I hope the balding process is slow and that I'll be okay when I'm 19 unlike my father who lost 1/4th of his hair at age 18.
The only way I can cheer myself up with is my online characters that I wish I could be but I know I never will be, and no I do not want hugboxxing saying that I can "be pretty", most people are repulsed by how I look for unchangeable reasons I will not disclose.
I've been confident in my trans identity since age 12, I wish I tried harder in hiding my hormones, I'm so full of regret.
I just don't know what to do...please someone cheer me up in some realistic way.
Oh no, someone called me by the name I've been called since the day I was born and now my day is ruined.
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I’m so fucking sick of this. I didn’t ask for this and the fact and they can just say whatever and live their life’s but I have to deal with the trauma of transphobia. I want to say something but I can’t because I’m scared that it will get out of hand. I’m so sick of how us trans women are seen as inhuman. And how people always say that we are the bad ones and we are the predators. They don’t know what it’s likes always having to look over your shoulder so somebody doesn’t clock you. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I want to scream. I want to shout. It’s so unfair how trans women literally commit sewer slide and yet the transphobia people that bullied them can live their lives. I hate my peers.
Man realizes he will never be a woman.
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My partner and I (both firmly on the ace spectrum but still curious) took our bras off in front of each other last night—something we’ve never done with anyone else before. We were both nervous, they more noticeably so than me. I however became maybe more self conscious than I’ve ever been, and when we put our clothes back on, I slowly started to break down.
They’re not someone who would boil me down to my body, so any judgement on myself came from me. They even consoled me, noticing when I began to visibly become emotional. I’m nearly four years on HRT and objectively speaking do not pass, nor have even close to conventionally attractive secondary sex traits. There was definitely an expectation from myself that I would gain more confidence after letting someone else see my boobs (and really just my entire upper body), and the total opposite happened. Beyond that, I keep trying to find explanations for my reaction but seem to be grasping at straws, so I come to ask if anyone else has been in a similar position? Any insight would be incredibly appreciated.
They’re not someone who would boil me down to my body, so any judgement on myself came from me. They even consoled me, noticing when I began to visibly become emotional. I’m nearly four years on HRT and objectively speaking do not pass, nor have even close to conventionally attractive secondary sex traits. There was definitely an expectation from myself that I would gain more confidence after letting someone else see my boobs (and really just my entire upper body), and the total opposite happened. Beyond that, I keep trying to find explanations for my reaction but seem to be grasping at straws, so I come to ask if anyone else has been in a similar position? Any insight would be incredibly appreciated.
