Link (Archive)

Pornography is incredibly difficult to quit. It is a very real addiction that rewires the brain. If your husband is open to accountability software, by all means use it. We use covenant eyes. It works on all of our devices. But do not put your trust in software. No software works 100 percent of the time. There is always a way around it.
If your husband is open to Christian counseling, do it. But not marriage counseling, counseling for him. He will need help to learn how to overcome addiction, strategies for rewiring the neuropathways in the brain, and help to see the damage caused by this sin.
Whether or not he is open to the types of help I mentioned, there are three incredibly important things you MUST do:
1. Stop looking. Seriously, do not check up on your husband. Don’t look at his likes or browser history. Men find this very disrespectful. It’s not your job to catch him in sin or convict. Leave that work to the Holy Spirit. The Lord sees everything.
2. Pray for your husband. Pray for him continually. Every time you think of him pray.
3. Be a good wife; obedient to all the commands the Lord gives to wives. You must show him respect and submit to him.
It’s not easy to do these things but remember that your trust is in the Lord. You don’t have to trust your husband, but you must always show him respect and submit to him. Do not bring up the past.
These things are as much for him as they are for you. Knowing if he is doing what is wrong isn’t helping you be a good wife. It isn’t helping you to give to your husband cheerfully. It isn’t helping you to trust in the Lord.
I have walked this road and helped many other women walk it as well. The Lord will help you.
Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives; While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear.
1 Peter 3:1,2
HOW TO DEAL WITH A HUSBAND ADDICTED TO PORN

Pornography is incredibly difficult to quit. It is a very real addiction that rewires the brain. If your husband is open to accountability software, by all means use it. We use covenant eyes. It works on all of our devices. But do not put your trust in software. No software works 100 percent of the time. There is always a way around it.
If your husband is open to Christian counseling, do it. But not marriage counseling, counseling for him. He will need help to learn how to overcome addiction, strategies for rewiring the neuropathways in the brain, and help to see the damage caused by this sin.
Whether or not he is open to the types of help I mentioned, there are three incredibly important things you MUST do:
1. Stop looking. Seriously, do not check up on your husband. Don’t look at his likes or browser history. Men find this very disrespectful. It’s not your job to catch him in sin or convict. Leave that work to the Holy Spirit. The Lord sees everything.
2. Pray for your husband. Pray for him continually. Every time you think of him pray.
3. Be a good wife; obedient to all the commands the Lord gives to wives. You must show him respect and submit to him.
It’s not easy to do these things but remember that your trust is in the Lord. You don’t have to trust your husband, but you must always show him respect and submit to him. Do not bring up the past.
These things are as much for him as they are for you. Knowing if he is doing what is wrong isn’t helping you be a good wife. It isn’t helping you to give to your husband cheerfully. It isn’t helping you to trust in the Lord.
I have walked this road and helped many other women walk it as well. The Lord will help you.
Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives; While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear.
1 Peter 3:1,2