🐷 Ethan Ralph's Twitter / Tweets - A collection of thoughts, insights and musings from the internet's favorite gunted hobbit

Will the "MMA" fight between Gabe Hoffman and Ethan Ralph 🐷 happen?

  • YES!

    Votes: 26 7.1%

  • lol no

    Votes: 341 92.9%
  • Total voters
    367
Look--an Alien! said:
Ralph, you pathetic, insecure wannabe nigger, WHY keep up the AH'M SOBER schtick? You actually make money on pillstreams, you don't even have to fake donos! You could have plenty of cash if you would just give up the delusional larp and submit to being a dancing pill piggy
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He's scared of dying alone in a puddle of his own fluids. Got news for Ralph on that one. We all shit ourselves when we die. Yours His will just be globally livestreamed. Think of it as a last "Fuck YEW" to all of us. Give in Piggertits, die like a Kang.

(EDIT)
 
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T00L Nigger said:
It will be a Kino moment the day this nigger wakes up in an ice bath and goes to X to post about it. Not that he has any value in his organs, but maybe they could make a high quality oil from the blubber of the gunt?

"Wuhdooyuh mean Ah Need uh New Kidneh? Ah cahnt uhford the wuns ah hav NOW!"

:felted:
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a street butchers salary is higher than any harvestable organ the ralphacorpus provides
 
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Capt. Jean Luc Ritard said:
I just don't get how you lose your phone in a car accident. Did it fly out the window into a gulch?
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If Ralph was really at no fault in the accident he would have been posting all over X about how shitty the Mexican drive. I bet he was not in an Uber but crossing the road without paying attention and got hit by the Uber. It explains both the hip injury and the broken phone.
 
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Obnoxious Asshole said:
He's scared of dying alone in a puddle of his own fluids. Got news for Ralph on that one. We all shit ourselves when we die. Yours His will just be globally livestreamed. Think of it as a last "Fuck YEW" to all of us. Give in Piggertits, die like a Kang.

(EDIT)
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The last thing anyone will ever hear from Ralph is a slow wet fart, which isn't very different from animated Ralph.

He could be dead on camera for days before someone either shuts the stream down or some plumbing torta chef comes hollering in between trials. Dollar superchats will mock his corpse.

His cats might even start eating his eyelids on stream, if not for the fact that they have almost certainly perished in his multi week journey to the land his daddy gave him.

This will be the most relevant thing ralph has ever done, and undoubtedly will change lives. Some will quit Xanax, some will decide to not adopt a cat.
 
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Well you have to put it together. Tijuana, strip bar, bruised up hip, phone gone.

Sounds to me like dumbass was coming out of the bar looking at his phone and one of these street vultures swooped in and grabbed his shit. He probably took a fall chasing after them.
 
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Ralph doesn't have the ability to lie about embarrassing events, he only withholds information, shuts down and disavows everything until the wheels of time slowly pop holes into the story and he eventually spills the beans in their entirety during some dead air on the keeelstream. Him stating that he didn't want to reveal that he almost died in a car wreck because it's "a-logs bait" is all the ebadaance I need, but we'll all know for certain once he lifts his FED shirt and reveals the tire tracks across his gunt due to being mistaken for El Chupacabra.
 
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Ralph lives in what I consider “nightmare mode”.

  • Losing my passport in a foreign country
  • Losing my cellphonetelephone
  • Losing my wallet
  • Missing a flight
  • Fucking up a flight booking
  • Not knowing where my next meal is coming from
  • Not being able to see my kids
  • Being fat
Like I have at least one nightmare about each of these scenarios happening to me, but for Ralph it’s just another Tuesday. Is he too low IQ to realize that these are all bad?
 
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Trigger Me Timbers said:
Ralph lives in what I consider “nightmare mode”.

  • Losing my passport in a foreign country
  • Losing my cellphonetelephone
  • Losing my wallet
  • Missing a flight
  • Fucking up a flight booking
  • Not knowing where my next meal is coming from
  • Not being able to see my kids
  • Being fat
Like I have at least one nightmare about each of these scenarios happening to me, but for Ralph it’s just another Tuesday. Is he too low IQ to realize that these are all bad?
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it's the indomitable piggy spirit that keeps him marching on.
 
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Deciphering the second part of Ralph's deleted piglish tweet I feel is key to understanding piggy's latest L. It's like a Cicada 3301 puzzle.

IMG_20240825_145115.jpg
 
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