Huh. Will you look at that. As close as we're getting to a Rafters admission, new WWEC account, and trying to shift over to gacha games. Nice. Well to be completely honest this is all we've ever wanted. If he quits the distress begging and just does normal begging, no problems there. I'm sure he'll still be shit at games but realistically you can't be very shit when you're a whale in gacha. Which I think is the new angle, King of Gacha Games. It's probably the only genre where being dented is a great advantage, and Phil can shine there.
On top of that gacha games have a bigger audience than normal games, as more people have phones than consoles. Most gamers nowadays are on mobile. Mobile is a hellscape, but honestly Phil with his weird addictive personality and dumbass disregard for how most of these games are an entirely pointless moneypit is the man for the job. Dude could do guides on how to properly whale at every shitty game and legit carve out an amazing, underexploited niche for himself.
Wanting to still be the uglier, goutier Max Dood is a pipe dream, I'll say that, but he definitely can be the new pudgy middle aged gamba addicted moron on Guersan's block. For a little while, at least. Gacha streaming is high risk, high reward, and if the new King's Klowns don't really nut up to fill the King's Gacha War Efforts, the King's gonna be Kooked. Dude's already rugpulling the juicers. He's done ONE stream of gacha and even if his intricate knowledge and required addiction are clearly there, he's proven to be shit at it. Except he's burning bridges with ye ol' charity Dents a little too fast.
As lukewarm as he's trying to be about it, like yeah he's not Rafters, he DEFFO still needs y'all guys help, he wouldn't want to be missing on that double-dip juicer King's Klowns+Drooling Dentheads khambo, he has to realize that he's hitching his wagon to a different (fat) horse and I don't think that genie's gonna go back in the bottle. He's actually gonna need people to juice him because they like him now, which might be a bit of a tall order. No way he's gonna be able to keep up the poor façade as he's openly throwing hundos at Gacha, both on and off stream.
Specially if the rugpulls become a common thing. There's a lot of untapped potential here. He could do doordash feasts with the horse, show her whaling out on her shitty Looney Tunes game as well, just be a true and honest piece of shit all around under the premise of making us seethe and cope. Problem is, much like when the bankruptcy got granted and it was clear he was running a scam, or when we got the pile of smoking guns for WWEC, 90% of the fun with this was the mystery. If there's no mystery there's no reason to seethe and cope.
I mean it when I say people will just stop hatewatching Phil now. He's shedding the detractors by doing this. It's definitely the right thing to do, even if he's doing it because the glazers have put stars and dollar signs in his eyes. Problem is, Phil really depended on his hatedom to stay relevant. Much like Boogie coming into Keem's lil' lolcow corral and doing these outrageous shitty things like faking cancer, it's all just as fake and gay as Phil's beloved wrasslin', so it fails to get any heat. Phil was fun to hatewatch because he was a genuine piece of shit who also tried very hard to hide it. If he doesn't hide it, well, he's just another run of the mill asshole on the internet.
As much as Phil has claimed over the years that we're deranged stalkers, I think he's about to find out that we're really not. Our problem was with him being a CONCEITED, lying, scamming, conniving beggar. If he's gonna graduate to a loud and proud fuckhead, we're more likely to just leave him be than anything. But it's not like we're gonna start juicing him, either.
We'll see for how long "Everybody likes him" and if he can go back to his usual distress begging ways when the bandwagon leaves town for good.
(Philip "Darksydephil" Burnell's search for drama-free boys to make online content with) has certainly taken some wild turns.
