Patrick Sean Tomlinson / @stealthygeek / "Torque Wheeler" / @RealAutomanic / Kempesh / Padawan v2.5 - "Conservative" sci-fi author with TDS, armed "drunk with anger management issues" and terminated parental rights, actual tough guy, obese, paid Quasi, paid thousands to be repeatedly unbanned from Twitter

[FailurePersonifiedV2]

That was a fun read. Sure there's some moments that made my eyes roll. "I got swatted and it was unsettling buhbuBUT WHAT IF I WAS A BLACK MAN?!"

I will admit it did take me out of the narrative for a moment, simply because it was one sentence just shoehorned

 

[reptile baht spaniard rid]

I will admit it did take me out of the narrative for a moment, simply because it was one sentence just shoehorned

I prefer to think he was quietly implying that if he was an urban blackman (I'm the urban blackman , as a lover second to none - It's a lot of fun) he wouldn’t have to worry about being swatted because he’d already be pepperoni.

@Null I believe with the current developments I can petition to add Rick to the thread title as a known and pertinent alias.

 

[Judge Holden]

There seems to be a small contingent of Stlakerchilds who hate Rick not so much because he's the most insufferable shitbag on earth, but because he's a Libtard. I swear some of these people would be fine with him if he had the exact same personality, but supported Trump.

The thing about Rick is that his politics literally don't matter. He doesn't actually give a shit about any of the positions he espouses. Those are just the standard political beliefs of the person he wants everyone to think he is. He doesn't actually give a rat's ass about black people or gays or trannies (except when he's trying to fuck them). It's all virtue signalling. He never does or says anything for any reason other than to stroke his own ego.

While there is certainly some je ne sais quoi with how fatty decides to broadcast his copypasted late-night talkshow opinions and how he blends it with his slop culture obsession, I agree that this has always been but a flavouring of the feast of fatrick, and one you can find far more extreme examples with ease. His charm has always been just how much of an amusingly vile and petulant retard lacking in even the slightest self awareness he is and how pathologically obsessed he is with "winning" internet fights and the just fucking jawdropping amount of time and efforts he pours into this despite all the damage this has done to his already unimpressive bank balance and reputation.

Combine this with honest to god Chris-Chan tier catchphrases (NO CHILD/ENJOY PRISON STALKER) and a memorably hideous and corpulent appearence, multiply by just how easy it is to poke him on social media and get instant cawntent, and you have the perfect example of the classic lolcow.

The resolute determination that his Tiny Tim book is going to be picked up and top bestseller lists, leading to the NYT and literary journals to declare him the new Terry Pratchett is the clearest example of this.

Just the fact that it hasn't twigged that firstly, someone who has published a book nearly always will get further books published, especially if the manuscript is already written, and his agent is still allegedly "shopping around" for a publisher shows how fundamentally he is incapable of grasping his own limitations.

Then the things like the high number of people who seem to side with his alleged criminal cyberstalkers.
Especially people like Keene and Lesley who would have no reason whatsoever to fuck their careers for the sake of calling him fat and thick.

And other things like how badly all his experiences with the court system have gone, and as is strongly suspected, getting banned from Hooligans which definitely was his favored drinking hole for many years.

Its like, if a Bar can boast a funny, smart published author as a regular, maybe they don't put it on a sign, but they certainly like word to get around so that fans and other local smart people will come to banter and quip with such a form of celebrity.
Mild PL, but I knew which bar Alan Moore drank in, and even if he could be a cantankerous and precious sod at times, the bar still appreciated his patronage and the comic nerd drinkers who showed up.

He was an actor, but many bars put up with the famously embarrassing and unpredictable behavior of Oliver Reed, because his presence was always a draw for customers wanting to see his drinking in action and hear his rambling anecdotes.

Of course, no one really wants to admit this to themselves, but surely he must see at some point that he is an unlikable thick fat cunt?

We sure he aint doing that Oprah "manifesting" shit, i.e. trying to actively NOCHILD reality into giving you the wealth and status you feel you deserve? Because that would be in character for pig man

 

[The Taco Santo!]

E: Also, unrelated to the above, but has he ever referred to Trump (or anyone else he dislikes) by a moniker?

Isn't he the retard that came up with 'sippy-cup Caligula', or was it his brother from another mother Movieblob?

 

[reptile baht spaniard rid]

Isn't he the retard that came up with 'sippy-cup Caligula', or was it his brother from another mother Movieblob?

I don’t know the case of the truth about that but holy fuck it would be hilarious to see a fat Rick and movie blob crossover. My God Twitter feeds would be thousands of miles long before they finally blocked each other and then kept unblocking each other to get in the last word like snide little motherfucker oh my God, oh my.

Or it would quickly turn into disgusting homosexual love fest like that comic Null reviewed on his stream last week.

 

[Chickin BBQ]

Our local police know that I own several registered firearms

imagine if I’d been black, or lived in an urban setting, rather than rural Pennsylvania

What the actual fuck. I dunno anything about the lolcow this faggot is writing about yet, but he's a blithering retard who confuses rural Penn for faggotsville Canada.

E: What a bunch of faggots.

 

[reptile baht spaniard rid]

What the actual fuck. I dunno anything about the lolcow this faggot is writing about yet, but he's a blithering retard who confuses rural Penn for faggotsville Canada.

My fire arms are registered with the NSA and the FCC and the DNC and the RNC and the CIA and the FDA and the SEC.

I don’t begrudge a Pat poster speaking in their native tongue. Let them have their fun. It’s all about getting Rick to explode.

It’s also Tripoli hilarious when you realize that the guy is basically saying I’m literally exactly what Rick wants to be. I’m the “conservative” Gunhaver liberal author who is successful and loved.

Also, I want to formally begin a petition to change Patposting to Rickwriting. Or in the case of @Judge Holden I will allow Rickriding.

 

[Oliver Onions]

> I don't claim to be an author
> I am one (an author)

It's that old Groucho Marx joke: 'Everybody laughed at me when I said I was going to be a comedian...well nobody's laughing now.'

I'm the urban blackman , as a lover second to none - It's a lot of fun

I wasn't expecting a Bonzo Dog Doo Dah Band reference when I browsed the Farms today. Bless you.

 

[Anonymus Fluhre]

What the actual fuck. I dunno anything about the lolcow this faggot is writing about yet, but he's a blithering retard who confuses rural Penn for faggotsville Canada.

E: What a bunch of faggots.

While you do not need to register your guns in Pennsylvania, the police there do keep track of all hand gun sales.

 

[downloads]

What the actual fuck. I dunno anything about the lolcow this faggot is writing about yet, but he's a blithering retard who confuses rural Penn for faggotsville Canada.

E: What a bunch of faggots.

I’m not directing this post only at you. It was just the most conveniently close one. The response in this thread to Keene's post shows that a lot of you guys are lucky or smart enough to work in a field where public perception doesn’t impact your success. But in current clown year, he had to include all that because if he didn’t, that would be the first thing that Rick would attack him for oh look Keene doesn’t care about people getting swatted, and millions of blacks are killed by police every day by swatTing etc.
It is gay and stupid, but there are certain asses you have to kiss when you make a post like that usually it’s troons but the backlash for not kissing black ass can be just as bad.

 

[Slimy Time]

THIS IS NOT A DRILL. THIS IS NOT A DRILL. WE HAVE A NEW SEASON ANNOUCNEMENT

https://briankeene.substack.com/p/letters-from-the-labyrinth-392

https://archive.ph/Fb3RF

Lets recap:

>Be successful writer Brian Keene,
>Be also super progressive, #metoo paladin, turbo leftwinger
>Be basically the actual man piggy has been roleplaying as for years
>Got tangentially involved with piggy, wished good luck and moved on
>Get multi tagged by a pest in a post involving people that Rick doesnt like
>In 1 week of twittering (ONE. WEEK.) Rick creates a new Leslie situation and transforms a well wisher ally into a full patposter
>Write an expose on Rick's behaviour and his past while dropping patposting lingo
>Journo on the SF scene comes forward that Rick had been trying some sort of gayops privately smearing Leslie

Rick needs to be sent to Vienna. His talent for unlikability knows no bounds

Unrelated to Fatrick but this made me laugh. It's leaking out a bit from Keene.

 

[WelperHelper99]

When I was younger (early 20s) I loved Brian Keene books, they were brainless horror novels and I could read really fast so I ran through them, I still pick one out every once in a while and enjoy them (but not the worm ones, fuck that shit lol)

And now I have something else to enjoy about him he's not a great writer but that doesn't matter, his books sell big time and while he's pretty staunchly left wing he still interacts with authors who are right wing if they're nice to him, and as a result he's built a very nice network of industry contacts

I think it'd be fair to say that he's done quite well for himself in a way that Fatprick wishes he could have done, and he's made quite a good living doing it too

Suffah Fatprick, suffah

Wow imagine that. Despite his political takes, Brian is still nice to people and doesn't wish literal death on his opponents. Almost like he's well adjusted and has above a 1.2 GPA or something. Pat wouldn't know.

 

[Kane Lives]

Is this it, Patposters? Is Fat Rick finally closing in on the LOTY he so richly deserves?

 

[reptile baht spaniard rid]

Wow imagine that. Despite his political takes, Brian is still nice to people and doesn't wish literal death on his opponents. Almost like he's well adjusted and has above a 1.2 GPA or something. Pat wouldn't know.

I was over at my dads house today helping with some household chores. He lives in a very rural area of a very red state. At the end of the work we went to one of the nearby country bars. It's the kind of place that farmers, truckers, legit cowboy boot wearers and the working class go to unwind with a cold one. Fat Rick was on the TV and the local gunt store owner said to his paralegal musician/songwriter (friends since high school), "You know what? He ain't so bad. The books are decent, nobody's posting, and we're stalking up on the Milwaukee stage again. Can't believe I'm saying this but Ol' Portyland Rick's got my support for lolcow this year." I looked around and all I saw were heads nodding in agreement. I heard a few calls of "Yes sir" and "Damn Straight" from the men around me. Even saw the lonely balldo wearing lawyer in the corner raise his drink with a nod.

 

[Meat Target]

Is this it, Patposters? Is Fat Rick finally closing in on the LOTY he so richly deserves?

He'll need to do some outrageous oinking in a span of 3 months. Last year was IMO the high water mark of The Rick Show.

Take my opinion FWIW, since I've been out of the Patposting scene ever since Quasi finally got his due.

 

[Useful_Mistake]

I've been curious for a while. Does anyone know what kind of text to speech does Cryptic Web Chronicles use for his pat videos?

 

[reptile baht spaniard rid]

He'll need to do some outrageous oinking in a span of 3 months. Last year was IMO the high water mark of The Rick Show.

I think it’s a hard row to hoe but I think he can pull it out. I believe in Rick, even with balldo he’s got a solid chance and definitely for second place.

The balldo saga ending with a deal and no body cam footage this year and a huge Rick election/erection explosion/meltdown/arrest saga can clinch it.

Especially if someone big gets it into their head that people like Rick on X are why Harris lost. And they use him as an example and get millions of views.

 

[lindsayfan]

I would have thought someone called so left wing by people in this thread, Brain and other sci-fi authors would all be pro Palestine /anti zionist types.

it's not a bad point but what you may be missing is that the world of rick, leslie, keene et al. is a world of mainstream zombie liberals. these aren't the genderspecial anticapitalists the farms often obsess over, they're complacent, "sensible centrist" boomers satisfied with the status quo. they enjoy prison politics at the sports-fan level: go team blue, beat that awful team red.

of course if you're an esoteric hyperborean a&h poster, these boring mayor-pete neolibs all still look like dangerous socialists who should be purged since they support desegrated swimming pools etc.

 

[AN/ALR56]

This shit is why pat is one of my favorite cows
>Be normal person
>hear about Patrick, either his stalking shit or the liberal meme he occasionally gets a couple hundred thousand likes
>start interacting with him for one day, feel bad for the trolls replying to him, but get curious about the one with his mugshot wondering where is that from, but you let it go
>already you try to get away or ignore his attempts at hiring you as his BFF
>one week later you're a patposter

 

[PyrrhicRustle]

Is this it, Patposters? Is Fat Rick finally closing in on the LOTY he so richly deserves?

Not unless he ends up in prison, stalker. Rekieta’s still way ahead.