Victor Markhoff / Ana Victoria Markhoff / vvictorman_uel - Powerchair faker pooner, has every illness, allergic to Krebs cycle, bed mayo enjoyer, kicked out of house and mental hospital, constant ebeggar, applesauce heiress paid to yeet her teets

[Stupid Sexy Flanders]

If you have a "killer migraine" that requires you to wear ear plugs, you'd notice it the minute you stepped out the door and would just pop back in and get them.

However, if you're a histrionic attention seeker and is putting on a show for everyone to know how much you're suffering, then "forgetting" your ear plugs is your goal for the day.

 

[behindyourightnow]

If you have a "killer migraine" that requires you to wear ear plugs, you'd notice it the minute you stepped out the door and would just pop back in and get them.

However, if you're a histrionic attention seeker and is putting on a show for everyone to know how much you're suffering, then "forgetting" your ear plugs is your goal for the day.

I have to give Vicky 3/10 on the migraine arc. She doesn't seem to have thought it through or done her research at all (maybe it's a spur-of-the-moment attempt to get out of some college deadlines?)

She hasn't given us justification as to why she has not simply taken one of the many effective abortive migraine meds (she could have at least informed us that she is allergic, or claimed that she can't afford them!). There's just a general lack of verisimilitude (a person with a "killer migraine" isn't bothered by the bright sunlight or smells but by... lack of ear plugs? And why is she "going out" in the first place?). Also, migraines just aren't very good Twitter munchie fuel. They're boring and a lot of people get them. It's like trying to do a big munchie grift based off having a sprained ankle. Yes, it sucks and in some rare unique cases maybe it can really fuck you up, but... it's a sprained ankle.

 

[Zemblan Physics]

Yes, it sucks and in some rare unique cases maybe it can really fuck you up, but... it's a sprained ankle.

On the other hand: she managed to get a power chair out of a labral tear, so maybe she has something creative up her sleeve? (Head transplant would be cool.)

But I agree, migraine arc is just… yawn.

The most likely development is probably that she’ll just use the “migraines” (I don’t even think she has a headache tbh) to retcon why she failed out of school again. There will be a lot of emphasis on how she was totally HEMIPLEGIC and that APS and NYU failed her and pls gib.

 

[The Judean People's Front]

On the other hand: she managed to get a power chair out of a labral tear, so maybe she has something creative up her sleeve? (Head transplant would be cool.)

But I agree, migraine arc is just… yawn.

The most likely development is probably that she’ll just use the “migraines” (I don’t even think she has a headache tbh) to retcon why she failed out of school again. There will be a lot of emphasis on how she was totally HEMIPLEGIC and that APS and NYU failed her and pls gib.

She's absolutely gonna use it as her reason she failed out of school again. It's a handy illness of self-report and it works with her medical "history." Boring, but quite useful for the munchie who doesn't want to be on the go.

I want her to explain how she's ever planning to work as a disability advocate or a professor/lecturer when she can't hold a simple half-time class schedule consistently as a student. When would she ever hold class? Will her stidents be on call for when she has The Spoons to do a lecture? Her school stuff is so performative - she just wants to cry that NYU couldn't accommodate her specialness.

 

[behindyourightnow]

A small orbiter detour while the migraine arc continues. This fellow ebegger Victoria just retweeted made me do a double take because I thought a covid forever-masker had decided to step things up and upgrade to a full executioner's mask:



Good for them switching things up a bit, I thought, but sadly I was mistaken.

Turns out, it's getting hard out there for woke ebeggars. Just being a POC or disabled or trans isn't enough anymore, you really have to stand out, which means finding increasingly boutique identity niches that no one else around you is occupying. Like "black enby niqabi trafficking survivor":



Talya (also occasionally known as "Tael") is hungry. She needs lunch!



I like her! Hope she does well.

 

[Larry David's Opera Cape]

A small orbiter detour while the migraine arc continues. This fellow ebegger Victoria just retweeted made me do a double take because I thought a covid forever-masker had decided to step things up and upgrade to a full executioner's mask:

View attachment 6512535

Good for them switching things up a bit, I thought, but sadly I was mistaken.

Turns out, it's getting hard out there for woke ebeggars. Just being a POC or disabled or trans isn't enough anymore, you really have to stand out, which means finding increasingly boutique identity niches that no one else around you is occupying. Like "black enby niqabi trafficking survivor":

View attachment 6512533

Talya (also occasionally known as "Tael") is hungry. She needs lunch!

View attachment 6512534

I like her! Hope she does well.

Honestly starting to feel like a shmuck and a sucker for not just firing up the fake profile making skills and trying my hand at this. Could pay off my dog's run of vet bills and also treat myself to some Japanese entrees that are usually outside the budget.

 

[Zemblan Physics]

A small orbiter detour

I, too, would like to present an orbiter that Vix interacts with occasionally. Meet Gregory H. Mansfield or Me, a wheelchair user. Mansfield is a “disabled lawyer, disability rights and disability justice” (we’ll get back to the lawyer part). He has quite a sizable following.



I couldn’t find much about him online, but some search results were restricted thanks to our EU overlords. I did find this though:



Yep. His law license is suspended.

He cracks me up, because his TL consists exclusively of entirely fictional true stories of interactions between him (a wheelchair user) and ableist chuds. I’m gonna spoiler because not everyone enjoys repetitive humor based on a retard with a retarded catchphrase (“me, a wheelchair user”). I’ll just give you one example right here:



Totally something medical staff would say, innit?

Spoiler: Me, a wheelchair user

And his most poetic one, with the zinger AT THE END!

They’re all god damn nuts.

 

[RandallBoggs]

So, how is our devout Jew Vicky spending this lovely Yom Kippur Shabbat? Atoning for her sins? Making amends with her estranged family? Fasting and turning off all electronics, which is the most basic way to observe this holy day even for the most agnostic of Jews?

Ah, of course not. She’s on twitter all day, retweeting fundraisers for Gazans. How unexpected!

 

[Breadbear]

So, how is our devout Jew Vicky spending this lovely Yom Kippur Shabbat? Atoning for her sins? Making amends with her estranged family? Fasting and turning off all electronics, which is the most basic way to observe this holy day even for the most agnostic of Jews?

Ah, of course not. She’s on twitter all day, retweeting fundraisers for Gazans. How unexpected!

Quit being ableist, she's doing Yummy Kipper the best she can.

 

[Diana Moon Glampers]

God only knows what she means by this.

Someone says it's normal for toddlers to cough sometimes and Vicky quickly tells us she almost died from cough. Source: her ass.

Hey white people, don't go trying to find out if someone's PoC ancestry is bogus. That'd just be weird, you know?

 

[Larry David's Opera Cape]

Someone says it's normal for toddlers to cough sometimes and Vicky quickly tells us she almost died from cough. Source: her ass.

She is full of her usual shit but the Redditors inventing something called "toddler cough" that entails constantly crouping like an 80 year old with COPD are just apologists for Big Daycare and they can fuck off to hell too.

 

[Flamin Park]

Okay, it looks like Dad may be jumping out front in the race to "which half of the divorce will Vicky turn on harder," but it's early days yet.

View attachment 6507088

That's a fucking blackbelt in munch hau zun if I've ever seen one

"I want sympathy for my parents divorce = Leatherface is Literally Me "

 

[Aunt Carol]

Making amends with her estranged family?

Someone else said it already, but man, I bet her parents are specifically looking for post-divorce lodgings where the bathroom is upstairs and there's no guest room. Probably wishing Victoria would declare she's EMF-sensitive next so they can just put out wifi boosters like hanging up garlic.

 

[Larry David's Opera Cape]

Someone else said it already, but man, I bet her parents are specifically looking for post-divorce lodgings where the bathroom is upstairs and there's no guest room. Probably wishing Victoria would declare she's EMF-sensitive next so they can just put out wifi boosters like hanging up garlic.

There aren't many advantages to those skinny build multi-use development condos where you have a living room with a bedroom stacked on it and another bedroom stacked on that. But keeping away munchie relations would definitely be one perk.

 

[Aunt Carol]

But keeping away munchie relations would definitely be one perk.

I have had dozens of people IRL tell me that one reason they're happy to be downsizing that they can stop hosting their adult children, although they usually dance around it being nice "not having to take care of anyone else."

It's something to keep in mind when you see those Reddit-type posts about people's parents selfishly moving somewhere they can't let the adult child crash along with grandkids and babydaddy. Some of the parents may be selfish, but man, I've met these adult children, too.

 

[Haram-Habibi]

Hell, if I was one of her parents, I'd move somewhere overseas just to get away from her.

I'd be looking for someplace like a medieval town with narrow streets, or one of those Greek islands with a tiny town on top of a hill.

Toss all her shit from her oh-so-beloved childhood home in a storage facility, pay her rent for her current shithole for six months, and never look back.

 

[behindyourightnow]

I'd move to a settlement in the West Bank. Go tell your Twitter buds about visiting me THERE, Vicky.

 

[sarna]

I'd move to a settlement in the West Bank. Go tell your Twitter buds about visiting me THERE, Vicky.

She can come on over and lie down in front of a bulldozer. That won't trigger her allergies, right?

 

[prolific_mango]

Browsing her feed (and the 1 billion things she reposts daily) is a good way to find munchies whining about how the saline shortage effects THEM the worst bc they need to do infusions bc drinking water by mouth is just tooooooo hard

 

[Carpe Jugulum]

View attachment 6509548
Tweets local woman who by her own admission does not have autism (and who is not suffering near enough). She might actually have forgotten ear plugs, so there’s always that.

How does she manage to even get dressed with a killer migraine? Most people can’t even get out of bed when it’s a bad one, let alone be functional enough to bitch about it on Xitter.

Can’t be that bad then.