James Rolfe / James D. Rolfe / Angry Video Game Nerd (AVGN) / Rex Viper and Cinemassacre / Screenwave - Now with not much grieving about a 41-year old man still making videos on YouTube. We're the balls on the dick.

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Which videos do you like the most from Cinemassacre?

  • Angry Video Game Nerd

    Votes: 1,810 63.5%

  • You Know Whats Bullshit

    Votes: 143 5.0%

  • James and Mike Mondays

    Votes: 96 3.4%

  • Board James

    Votes: 441 15.5%

  • Monster Madness

    Votes: 270 9.5%

  • James' movie reviews

    Votes: 90 3.2%
  • Total voters
    2,850
New AVGN

ETA:
1. That hair...Shave that fucking egghead or get a wig or something, Bimmy.
2. Why does the gameplay footage constantly switch aspect ratio? It started giving me a headache.
3. "Vampires can be killed by a fist to the balls or a kick to the dick." That legit made me lol
4. The 5 seconds or so of Nostferartu film tribute at the end was pretty cool. the rest of the episode was another Slobwave tier assload of fuck.

Also, "Gameplay by James"....yeah right. "James" who?
 
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innocent jogger said:
New AVGN

ETA:
1. That hair...Shave that fucking egghead or get a wig or something, Bimmy.
2. Why does the gameplay footage constantly switch aspect ratio? It started giving me a headache.
3. "Vampires can be killed by a fist to the balls or a kick to the dick." That legit made me lol
4. The 5 seconds or so of Nostferartu film tribute at the end was pretty cool. the rest of the episode was another Slobwave tier assload of fuck.

Also, "Gameplay by James"....yeah right. "James" who?
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Every time James releases a new AVGN episode I am disappointed that he hasn't shaved his head yet.
 
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I thought this new episode was alright. There being literally one piece of Halloween decor was pretty boring, he couldn't even dim the fucking lights or something? I don't mind calmer episodes like this, not all of them need skits and a bunch of special effects for me. At the very least it wasn't actively bad, so I'm grateful for that much.
 
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Im surprised there was no segment of him flipping out at the fact that there is a good and a bad ending, the latter being easily achieved by just getting a continue 8 times (which given how easy you die, will happen inevitably) and you can tell you are locked to the bad ending when the photographs in the screen has changed slightly with the girl now having fangs. The bad ending basically has her biting the hero in the neck, implying she turned him into a vampire too.

"You mean to tell me I gotta do that shit without failing 8 times ?! Or else the game punishes you by making it all for nothing?! THATS LIKE DOING A BULLSHIT SPORT TRACK DESIGNED BY A BULLY AND IF YOU SLIP UP, WHICH YOU WILL, ENOUGH TIMES, YOU GET A KICK TO THE BALLS ONCE YOU FINALLY GET IT DONE! HOW COULD HAVE THEY DESIGNED A GAME THIS DESPICABLY?! WHAT A PILE OF BLOODY VAMPIRE BAT SHIT!! WHY!? FUUUUUUCK!!!"

Felt like they were building up to that before the final freak out and destruction of the game but no, he just kind of skips this significant aspect of the game. A very meh episode.
 
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Elderly beef taco said:
It also will always shock me James still makes content. I assumed he retired ages ago and then I'll randomly see a new upload. He'd be better off working a regular 9-5 by this point, doubt he makes much money online anymore.
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It's pretty easy money though, especially as I doubt he writes much of the script these days. Just set up a day to film it and then Screenwave takes care of the rest. His wife got a 9-5 as a teacher (?) so they have one predictable solid income stream and then James's inconsistent one from YouTube, so they're probably doing alright.

I'm also not sure what 9-5 jobs James could realistically handle considering he comes across as way more autistic when he's not in control of the situation. Plus, maybe he has some sort of second job we just don't know about since he wisely doesn't share a lot of his personal life online, except for that book.
 
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The handsome tard said:
Im surprised there was no segment of him flipping out at the fact that there is a good and a bad ending, the latter being easily achieved by just getting a continue 8 times (which given how easy you die, will happen inevitably) and you can tell you are locked to the bad ending when the photographs in the screen has changed slightly with the girl now having fangs. The bad ending basically has her biting the hero in the neck, implying she turned him into a vampire too.

"You mean to tell me I gotta do that shit without failing 8 times ?! Or else the game punishes you by making it all for nothing?! THATS LIKE DOING A BULLSHIT SPORT TRACK DESIGNED BY A BULLY AND IF YOU SLIP UP, WHICH YOU WILL, ENOUGH TIMES, YOU GET A KICK TO THE BALLS ONCE YOU FINALLY GET IT DONE! HOW COULD HAVE THEY DESIGNED A GAME THIS DESPICABLY?! WHAT A PILE OF BLOODY VAMPIRE BAT SHIT!! WHY!? FUUUUUUCK!!!"

Felt like they were building up to that before the final freak out and destruction of the game but no, he just kind of skips this significant aspect of the game. A very meh episode.
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Considering he apparently couldn't even beat this game, I doubt he even knew about the two endings.

This is one of those reviews where I kinda wanna play the game myself to see if its really as bad as he says. Its always the eternal contradiction of AVGN: Are the controls really that inconsistent or is he just not recognizing that he sucks at games?

As for the ep itself... for me modern AVGN has lately been "its fun to watch once and there is something warm and fuzzy about Rolfe still being at it, but I rarely ever re-watch episodes."
 
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I thought the episode was alright, it didn't sound like someone else's words coming through James's mouth (which is the main problem of nuAVGN for me), since he actually has previous experience with the game, they even covered it in a James and Mike video almost a decade ago.

And even in this you can tell they start the video liking the game, but slowly get dissapointed by it.
 
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skykiii said:
This is one of those reviews where I kinda wanna play the game myself to see if its really as bad as he says. Its always the eternal contradiction of AVGN: Are the controls really that inconsistent or is he just not recognizing that he sucks at games?
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I remember briefly playing it years ago on an emulator because it seemed cool, but yeah, I do recall it being difficult to control so I fully expected that to be a part of his complaint. With that said, I hardly put any effort into it, so maybe it's less awkward once you learn the controls.
 
Mr. Duck said:
I thought the episode was alright, it didn't sound like someone else's words coming through James's mouth (which is the main problem of nuAVGN for me), since he actually has previous experience with the game, they even covered it in a James and Mike video almost a decade ago.

And even in this you can tell they start the video liking the game, but slowly get dissapointed by it.
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It's an interesting title. Oldschool Prince of Persia meets 2D Beat 'em Up. What kills the game is the difficulty. The jumps are just like Prince of Persia where everything is delayed and slippery (like running on ice) and the devs seriously expect you to make pixel perfect make a single mistake and fuck you kind of jumps.

There's a reason why there's next to no nostalgia for the oldschool Prince of Persia games and others like it because the controls were deliberately made to be bad and it sucks the fun completely out of the game.

It's probably impossible to achieve but if a romhack or (better yet) a remake is made that just fixes the controls then the game would be a classic.

Edit: I refuse to watch the latest AVGN. Instead I'll just rewatch the James & Mike episode because that's a million times better.
 
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BrunoMattei said:
There's a reason why there's next to no nostalgia for the oldschool Prince of Persia games
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That and most people never played the objectively best version, the Sega CD one.


Many will also stick up for the SNES version as it has new levels and gives you more time... but I'll take early 90s anime aesthetic mixed with bad English dubbing over more levels any day of the week.
 
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innocent jogger said:
New AVGN

ETA:
1. That hair...Shave that fucking egghead or get a wig or something, Bimmy.
2. Why does the gameplay footage constantly switch aspect ratio? It started giving me a headache.
3. "Vampires can be killed by a fist to the balls or a kick to the dick." That legit made me lol
4. The 5 seconds or so of Nostferartu film tribute at the end was pretty cool. the rest of the episode was another Slobwave tier assload of fuck.

Also, "Gameplay by James"....yeah right. "James" who?
Click to expand...
Yeah. This was definitely one of his weaker episodes.
 
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