Nicholas Robert Rekieta / Rekieta "Law" / Actually Criminal / @NickRekieta - Polysubstance enthusiast, "Lawtuber" turned Dabbleverse streamer, swinger, "whitebread ass nigga", snuffs animals for fun, visits 🇯🇲 BBC resorts. Legally a cuckold who lost his license to practice law. Wife's bod worth $50. The normies even know.

What would the outcome of the harassment restraining order be?

  • A WIN for the Toe against Patrick Melton.

    Votes: 63 15.0%

  • A WIN for the Toe against Nicholas Rekieta.

    Votes: 6 1.4%

  • A MAJOR WIN for the Toe, it's upheld against both of them.

    Votes: 106 25.2%

  • Huge L, felted, cooked etc, it gets thrown out.

    Votes: 79 18.8%

  • A win for the lawyers (and Kiwi Farms) because it gets postponed again.

    Votes: 166 39.5%
  • Total voters
    420
Shig O'nella said:
We ban under age posters on sight, and she's currently acting like a calfstruck 15 year old.
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Surely exceptions can be made, and while at it @Null can roll out the red carpet for our newfound queen with a verified checkmark like @Potentially Criminal got, along with her own dedicated AMA-style thread where all the spergs had damned well better be on their best behavior.

April: look, I know 6998 pages can seem like a lot to read through, so as a timesaver just rest assured that nobody has ever said a single mean thing about you in this thread and everyone's been rooting for you all along, no matter what that nasally endowed narcissist told you about this place. The one thing we will not ever do, ever - this is my pledge - we will never lie to you like he did. Now I get it that the bodycam footage consent may be a lot to ask right now, and the time for that may come, but for starters now is the time to come home to this safe space and finally speak your truth, among friends. We will be your shelter from the storm, and the wind beneath your wings. Please just answer
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's calls and let's begin the healing. We can make this thing work!


 
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Accidental Protege said:
Just one more and he can fill out his MySpace Top 8!
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That is a tough choice. My candidates would be:

- Grifty
- Robert Barnes
- Melton
- Vito
- Mersh (?)

Reputation: Barnes has to take it. He is or was kind of a somebody.
Awfulness: it would be between Melton and Grifty. (Sorry Vito) And Melton would seem to be the easy choice.
Least harmful: Mersh
Most directly harmful to Nick: Barnes (because of bad legal advice)
Most directly harmful to Nick's reputation: Melton
Most useful to Nick - None of them
Least useful to Nick - Vito
Least likely to turn on Nick: Grifty
Most likely to turn on Nick: Mersh
 
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Strix454 said:
That is a tough choice. My candidates would be:

- Grifty
- Robert Barnes
- Melton
- Vito
- Mersh (?)

Reputation: Barnes has to take it. He is or was kind of a somebody.
Awfulness: it would be between Melton and Grifty. (Sorry Vito) And Melton would seem to be the easy choice.
Least harmful: Mersh
Most directly harmful to Nick: Barnes (because of bad legal advice)
Most directly harmful to Nick's reputation: Melton
Most useful to Nick - None of them
Least useful to Nick - Vito
Least likely to turn on Nick: Grifty
Most likely to turn on Nick: Mersh
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Keanu Thompson is definitely a strong candidate. Melonie Mac was at one time, but not anymore.
 
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Strix454 said:
That is a tough choice. My candidates would be:

- Grifty
- Robert Barnes
- Melton
- Vito
- Mersh (?)

Reputation: Barnes has to take it. He is or was kind of a somebody.
Awfulness: it would be between Melton and Grifty. (Sorry Vito) And Melton would seem to be the easy choice.
Least harmful: Mersh
Most directly harmful to Nick: Barnes (because of bad legal advice)
Most directly harmful to Nick's reputation: Melton
Most useful to Nick - None of them
Least useful to Nick - Vito
Least likely to turn on Nick: Grifty
Most likely to turn on Nick: Mersh
Click to expand...
What about Melonie Mac?
 
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IamnottheNSA said:
Crackets is not only stealing the LOTY award again, he is now stealing Fatrick's whole shtick!
I now really wanna see Fatrick go against Crackets.
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I imagine it would go something like this.

Pat: Wrong in every delusional detail, stalker. Your life is already over, stalker. Enjoy prison, stalker.
Nick: Wrong in every delusional detail, nerd. My life is only just beginning, nerd. I will enjoy prison, nerd. Enjoy Canada.
Pat: Wrong in every delusional detail, stalker. Your life is already over, stalker. Enjoy prison, stalker.
Nick: Wrong in every delusional detail, nerd. My life is only just beginning, nerd. I will enjoy prison, nerd. Enjoy Canada.
(repeat forever)

Strix454 said:
That is a tough choice. My candidates would be:

- Grifty
- Robert Barnes
- Melton
- Vito
- Mersh (?)

Reputation: Barnes has to take it. He is or was kind of a somebody.
Awfulness: it would be between Melton and Grifty. (Sorry Vito) And Melton would seem to be the easy choice.
Least harmful: Mersh
Most directly harmful to Nick: Barnes (because of bad legal advice)
Most directly harmful to Nick's reputation: Melton
Most useful to Nick - None of them
Least useful to Nick - Vito
Least likely to turn on Nick: Grifty
Most likely to turn on Nick: Mersh
Click to expand...

I know Grifty is bad, but is he more awful than actual pedophile Vito? Lolberts are all pedophiles in potentia, but I don't think Grifty's there yet.
 
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Henri Barbusse said:
I know Grifty is bad, but is he more awful than actual pedophile Vito? Lolberts are all pedophiles in potentia, but I don't think Grifty's there yet.
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Vito is never even around any children, so he might be a greasy, disgusting pedophile, but nobody allows him around kids anyway. Grifty openly admits he and his whore wife did hard drugs around his kids and both of them did drugs while she was pregnant with his kids.

He could be lying, it's hard to imagine garbage like Grifty even having a wife, but dumber and trashier people reproduce every day.

It's hard to think Buck v. Bell wasn't right, though. "Three generations of imbeciles are enough."
 
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This is disgusting. I'm not being a snob. Also, I know how to cook.

So for the pasta dish, he used:
- White onions, fine. (Why? But whatever.)
- Lots of mushrooms, not good for someone like him who's just playing with food.
- Butter, sacrilegious.
- Cheese? None. The Romans would hang him from the Town Square's lamppost.

While I only skimmed through the video, this is what he probably did.
- Fry up and kill the protein, he did not get rid of all the fatty oil, or keep them for later.
- Dump everything else in, including the quartered mushrooms and butter (gross).
- Dump the pasta into this pathetic small skillet, completely overstuffing it.

I'm not going to be a massive faggot and say the peppers should have been ground in a mortar and pestle, that's too snobby.
- Mushrooms sweat A LOT. They release all their water contents when cooked. Generally, you must cook them on the side if you intend to use them in pasta, fried rice and so on. Dump them in soup or stock all you want though.
- He's using what appears to be 100 grams of butter, or around 7-8 tablespoons. Why? There's enough fat in the skillet already. I'm pretty sure he didn't get rid of the oil.
- I don't see any cheese or a cup to save pasta water.
- The skillet is just way too small, cast iron keeps heat very well. Unless he undercooked the pasta, it's totally ruined. You generally want to use a large pan that reacts to heat very well for pasta, such as stainless steel or copper.
The result speaks for itself. Disgusting. Look at the miserable pappardelle, it resembles rice noodles used in Chinese cooking. This guy really thinks if you mash together a bunch of expensive ingredients, you'll get something that would taste good. To be fair, it won't taste bad, it also won't taste good.
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Here's how to improve this atrocious dish.
  1. Thinly slice the mushrooms and sweat it.
  2. Use guanciale or at least pancetta in a cold stainless steel frying pan, thinly slice it and put it in right away. Don't preheat the pan. The pan will heat up to slowly release the fat content of the meat. Use bacon if you belong on a cross.
  3. Cook the steak with the onion, or in the case of wagyu, don't use anything. Just season it with salt and pepper.
  4. Cook the pasta in a large pot, Skelly at least got this one right. Deduct 1-2 minutes from the recommended cooking time.
  5. As the pasta is cooking, mix egg yolks (3 yolks to one portion of egg whites) with grated/fine shredded pecorino cheese. If you can't get pecorino, use Grana Padano.
  6. Mix it until you can separate the mix by dragging the whisk across without it appearing watery. Then add in black pepper.
  7. Keep an eye out on the steak. Fish it out when it's done.
  8. Keep a mug of pasta water, transfer the pappardelle to the pan with guanciale in it, turn the heat to low. Put the mushrooms in the pan as well, make sure to get rid of any water.
  9. Place the pan onto the pasta pot, add in the egg mix.
  10. Use the tongs to mix, add in pasta water until you get the desired creaminess. You can add in some of the steak fat if you like. Don't overdo it unless you want the pasta to be somewhat eggy.
  11. Top with black pepper and more pecorino cheese, add sliced steak.
It's not that hard. Once various canvas pasta recipes are learnt, you can get flexible from there. This is a spin on the classic carbonara. We're adding in mushrooms to balance the steak and potentially using steak fat with fat from guanciale.
 
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I think one of my favorite thing about lolcow threads is every time lolcows do lolcooking we get some usable recipes out of it.

That's a lot more useful than the loltheology we get when Nickhole starts getting religious on us while pissing in the face of Christ.
 
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