Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

[Adamska]

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What did Disney do this time?

I find it absolutely comical that Jack is okaying a family by choice film, which retcons the actual story. It's even funnier that he's angy about it failing, despite it being a blatant quest for more money, ripping off the better direct-to-video sequel decades ago, and despite it looking like shit due to the stiff nonreal faces. It's interesting to see him try to defend this movie honestly, since the people who he really cares about opinion wise would probably all hate this film.

I genuinely think that Jack only hates the films given to him if his brother tells him what to think. Fat retard just wants to see action, and can't even remember what the fuck happened unless it involves men or women tonguefucking each other.

 

[Marc]

Jack has a pathological need to be "right" all the time and is too low-IQ to mask it in sophistry (see Scott Adams for the high-IQ example of this).

I refer to this as the "Neverwrong Lolcow Spectrum"; with folks such as low-functioning Jack at one end (embodying the moron's concept of a useless imbecile), Adams somewhere near the middle (ebodying the moron's idea of a smart person), and high-functioning (but, ultimately, self-defeating) charlatans such as Chris Langan (whose wikipedia article seems to have been written by someone who hates him) at the other end. The latter tend to be parasites so dependent upon chicanery that they (more-often-than-not) reside exclusively within or adjacent to academia, or are self-branded "outsiders" who nonetheless rely upon vaguely academic-sounding institutions to vet or otherwise lend presumptions of credibility to the esoteric jargon they self-publish (though never for the sake of peer review). The high-functioning neverwrong lolcows are almost a breed unto themselves; because they're ultimately morons who survive through pandering to morons identifying as being superior to morons - Whereas Jack routinely poisons himself while secretly living off his wife's family, and Dilbert Man (who has been living off of his only good idea for forty years) will burn millions of his own dollars investing in burritos that give you painful farts or trophy wives guaranteed to only be in it for the divorce.

Without making this a twenty paragraph post, I lump them together because they're all Cluster Bs who, for whatever reason, develop a terminal inferiority complex in which they decide that "I'm always right" is their mantra, identity, and religion; and will endlessly invoke the same, self-aggrandizing fallacies in the arguments they constantly need to be immersed in, simply because they find any allure of egocentric gratification seemingly within reach to be irresistible. And we become aware of them because their grasp routinely extends beyond their reach.

It's even funnier that he's angy about it failing, despite it being a blatant quest for more money

You can always trust Jack to back the wrong horse. The aroma of gud meetz cooking would lead Jack to walk right past heaven and into hell, and he would spend eternity happily being force-fed his own cooking without ever wondering where Jesus is.

 

[Falcon Sebben]

Ironically one of the most successful parts of the Lion King franchise was (and is) the Broadway musical. Obviously live action. It's the "soulless" part that made the difference. Well, the OBVIOUSLY soulless part. Disney mostly succeeded before wokeshit by successfully faking sincerity.

The biggest problem with the "live action" remake of "The Lion King" other than the CGI abominations was it told the exact same story as the cartoon. This is the biggest problem with all these live action Disney movies. In a lot of cases they're just shot for shot remakes of the original so what's the point in seeing it?

The stage musical? Followed the same story but it wasn't a slavish copy of it and frankly it was one of the better stage musicals I had seen in that time. Mufasa is just a soulless cash grab.

And it's not so much that they went "woke" but they're going woke for the sake of it. If the story doesn't suffer then who the hell cares? But too often it's hammered into place with all the subtlety of a sledgehammer to the face.

I find it absolutely comical that Jack is okaying a family by choice film, which retcons the actual story. It's even funnier that he's angy about it failing, despite it being a blatant quest for more money, ripping off the better direct-to-video sequel decades ago, and despite it looking like shit due to the stiff nonreal faces. It's interesting to see him try to defend this movie honestly, since the people who he really cares about opinion wise would probably all hate this film.

I genuinely think that Jack only hates the films given to him if his brother tells him what to think. Fat retard just wants to see action, and can't even remember what the fuck happened unless it involves men or women tonguefucking each other.

It's worse when you realize he has trouble seeing the screen so it's all blurry to him. He's admitted he has trouble seeing since the last stroke. So why does he even go to the movies?

Popcorn. That's why.

 

[Marc]

The biggest problem with the "live action" remake of "The Lion King" other than the CGI abominations was it told the exact same story as the cartoon. This is the biggest problem with all these live action Disney movies. In a lot of cases they're just shot for shot remakes of the original so what's the point in seeing it?

Though pedantic, I'll mention that the remake removed the "Be Prepared" musical number because it contained "fascist imagery" which children in 1994 were deemed emotionally mature enough to handle, and adults in 2019 deemed too fragile to possibly endure during Donald Trump's Genocide of Trans People (which totally happened, by the way).

What I'm saying is that Jack's tapioca brain is precisely what makes him the ideal audience for such slop - But people slightly less tapioca-brained than Jack want different slop; and are voting with their wallets. And Jack can't wrap his head around it.

 

[Agamemnon Busmalis]

Though pedantic, I'll mention that the remake removed the "Be Prepared" musical number because it contained "fascist imagery" which children in 1994 were deemed emotionally mature enough to handle, and adults in 2019 deemed too fragile to possibly endure during Donald Trump's Genocide of Trans People (which totally happened, by the way).

The most hilarious part is I always think of the GDR in that scene. Seid bereit, wir sind immer bereit!

 

[Tiresome]

he would spend eternity happily being force-fed his own cooking

-entrails, served raw and dripping except for the sporadic spots that are dried out and burned, greased with his own fat and coated in coagulated, garage-warm and putrified The Best Sauce You'll Ever Taste, Jack made to consume them freshly spilled from his rent-open belly in an endless, torturous cycle. Give the lord of darkness a little credit, he knows what our culinary asshole truly deserves.

 

[Marc]

I think everyone who goes to hell is reincarnated to live out Jack Scalfani's life - Even Jack.

 

[Aunt Carol]

-entrails, served raw and dripping except for the sporadic spots that are dried out and burned, greased with his own fat and coated in coagulated, garage-warm and putrified The Best Sauce You'll Ever Taste, Jack made to consume them freshly spilled from his rent-open belly in an endless, torturous cycle.

That's really vivid and all but the problem is Jack would like it.

 

[Falcon Sebben]

Though pedantic, I'll mention that the remake removed the "Be Prepared" musical number because it contained "fascist imagery" which children in 1994 were deemed emotionally mature enough to handle, and adults in 2019 deemed too fragile to possibly endure during Donald Trump's Genocide of Trans People (which totally happened, by the way).

What I'm saying is that Jack's tapioca brain is precisely what makes him the ideal audience for such slop - But people slightly less tapioca-brained than Jack want different slop; and are voting with their wallets. And Jack can't wrap his head around it.

That's literally retarded. We've gotten so weak as a people that such things can't be shown for fear of triggering a few snowflakes.

There was meaning behind the fascist imagery because it was fascist imagery. It fit with the whole idea of Scar wanting to take over. Blame Orange Man all you want for it, this has been going on for the longest time. But the really stupid thing is... there's other examples of this in popular culture that were taken straight from actual fascists and most people don't realize it.

Spoiler: movie sperging

This scene from Star Wars:

Can be said to be inspired from this scene:

The sense of scale, or grandeur of POWER which was the whole point in Leni Riefenstahl's work. But how many people outside of film nerds and historians would make that connection?

The fact that they call the soldiers of the Empire to be "Stormtroopers" is not a coincidence. Neither is the rather Naziesque look of the uniforms on the officers.

But keep the scenes of Mufasa being killed and all that. Kids are okay with violence so long as you don't show anything overtly fascist. But then it's not kids they're worried about. It's fucking college aged snowflakes. I swear we're raising a generation of absolute pussies that can't handle any kind of adversity.

But yeah. Fatty is a retard. Of that there's no question.

 

[Uber driver reviewer]

lol Jack, the man who fights a one-man culture war against Disney with one arm, has described that he wants to die defending Mount Moustaffa.

The Jews at Disney have Jack completely bamboozled.

 

[AltisticRight]

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What did Disney do this time?

Complete with a gay Grok AI image.
Nobody cares, fatty. Don't like, don't fucking watch. Bitching about it only gives it more attention and makes Disney fans watch this slop to spite you. That's similar to how each time JKR makes news due to her "transphobic and problematic xeets", I buy another Harry Potter Lego set. Give me all the puzzles. Every dollar spent is a tranny swinging from a ceiling fan, my kill count is in 4 digits. TTD is inevitable.

It means he's a retard. He's claiming that he's been right all this time about everything.

Meanwhile I wouldn't trust Fatty to tell me the temperature outside even if he showed me the thermometer.

It's negative 5 degrees Fahrenheit outside and it's snowing, says Scalfatty holding up a thermometer.

 

[Doctor of Autism]

Nobody cares, fatty. Don't like, don't fucking watch. Bitching about it only gives it more attention and makes Disney fans watch this slop to spite you. That's similar to how each time JKR makes news due to her "transphobic and problematic xeets", I buy another Harry Potter Lego set. Give me all the puzzles. Every dollar spent is a tranny swinging from a ceiling fan, my kill count is in 4 digits. TTD is inevitable.

The thing is, Jack is Mufasa's biggest defender right now, crying that it is failing due to Disney's political agendas from their previous movies. He is bitching that Disney's "wokeness" is driving people away from Mufasa despite 3 of their movies this year being in the top 5 highest grossing films.

 

[ZipDisk]

Tiresome, your hell recipe would have jack weeping with joy. He finally godit right!

 

[Ihatejackscalfani]

In the first 15 minutes of watching a show, small brained, movie critic Jack is already in love with it.

 

[Uber driver reviewer]

On Jack's Livestream right now on YouTube, he gives some stupid advice. Around the 33-34 minute mark, he talks about that he thinks people should 'die broke' by spending all their money during their lifetime. Leave it to Jack to not see any point in leaving his children any money from his estate, so they could put it to good use. Just use it all up, instead! Why not, right? What a damn selfish fool.

Edited to add:

He actually already has diabetes. He's said this himself in very old videos of his, I think, like 14 yrs ago.

And also, I think this philosophy of his financially has to do w/ his earnings through his 'career' having been so low, that he re-frames it mentally as his counter-culture goal to bankrupt himself--'on purpose, gais!'

Jack knows he is going to end up being a medical vegetable given as many visiting nurses or convalescent homes as he needs.

He will get all of this for free, but only after assets have been exhausted. You will get the same care, but only after the providers have hoovered up your assets to the tune of $500+ per day. So most people facing this start a period of asset transfer to protect assets and make them “look” broke at this stage in their lives. But you have to initiate this at least ten years ahead of time.

So yeah, Jack is just playing another tax / asset hiding scam, so he can get socialized medicine to keep him farting, belching, and bitching all day until the wendigo leaves his rotting body, Jack will be “broke” at end of life care, but it will all be a shell game.

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In the first 15 minutes of watching a show, small brained, movie critic Jack is already in love with it.

 

[ILikeYou]

I haven't seen any of the movies Jack is commenting on, but did he ever stop to think that maybe a large portion of Americans are politically progressive, themselves, and are happy to have a movie with a vaguely 'woke' storyline and characters?

 

[AnOminous]

Popcorn. That's why.

The popcorn is just his excuse for slurping down the "buddur."

I haven't seen any of the movies Jack is commenting on, but did he ever stop to think that maybe a large portion of Americans are politically progressive, themselves, and are happy to have a movie with a vaguely 'woke' storyline and characters?

Most movies, even good ones, are at least somewhat left, although it's the kind of watered down Hollywood millionaire version of leftism that often just ends up being stuff like "glowies bad" that most people in general agree with, i.e. stuff like scary fascist stormtrooper types kidnapping E.T.

 

[Hungry Homeless Handjob]

I haven't seen any of the movies Jack is commenting on, but did he ever stop to think

No

 

[Ihatejackscalfani]

When you see a movie at a theater or stream some movie from home on the flat-screen from Netflix or whatever streaming platform you are subscribed too...

You spend some money, eat some popcorn corn, drink some beers, and enjoy some sour patch kids with your friends or significant others.

You bullshit around afterwards.


Could you imagine being around Jack after a movie with his drooling and him trying to over analyze every single scene due to some sort of "political agenda" and saying "gud" or not.

God damn. That's a kill joy for me.

 

[Doctor of Autism]

Could you imagine being around Jack after a movie with his drooling and him trying to over analyze every single scene due to some sort of "political agenda" and saying "gud" or not.

Honestly it's simple minded on what Jack deems a political agenda. Which is that if it empowers minorities, gays, or women, it's woke. If it bashes Trump/Republicans or goes against any of his conspiracy theories (like the moon landing being faked), it's woke.

Same for his no violence thing, though I have no idea what the criteria is for that since he says a movie is bad for having violence yet likes Shogun, Kraven, and fucking Saw X.