Sony hate thread

TL;DR - dude tries to be honest, gets punished
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Back in my day (yep), you got a game for Christmas, you opened the box, you installed it from the physical media in the box, and you played it. 3 steps, roughly, if my counting fingers are still good in my advancing years.

In 2024, you get a PC game for Christmas, and this is what happens:

  1. Santa purchases a digital license for a game.
  2. Child receives game and installs it. Parent leaves, thinking child will be happy with their new game.
  3. Child opens the game, is greeted with a message that they need a Sony account (in addition to their age-appropriate Steam account, which is in addition to their age-appropriate Google account needed to have an email address and their age-appropriate Microsoft account to have access to Windows).
  4. Child calls for parent that they need a Sony account.
  5. Parent clicks through "child account creation" page, which requires an adult account to provision.
  6. Parent forgets their adult Sony login information (we're on a PC, not a PS5), has to look up their credentials, which are locked behind MFA on their phone.
  7. Parent must satisfy Sony MFA via emailed auth code.
  8. Parent signs in -- must re-auth email for the adult account (despite MFA already using said email).
  9. Parent signs up for child account.
  10. Parent must verify child email by signing into child Gmail account.
  11. Parent must provide payment info to demonstrate that they are an adult. $0.50 must be charged to their adult-shaped credit card.
  12. Parent enters credit card info.
  13. Parent agrees to the $0.50 transaction using newly added credit card.
  14. Unknown Error
  15. Parent agrees to $0.50 transaction.
  16. Unknown Error
  17. Parent uses semi-child-appropriate curse word ("for crap's sake") signs out of adult account, signs back in, finds where to create a child account, goes back through child account creation, agrees to $0.50 transaction. Success.
  18. Parent must specify child account settings (age limits, etc). 1 or 2 EULAs here.
  19. Parent goes back to game, signs in as child with new child account.
  20. Parent must verify email account with MFA token sent to child account email.
  21. Error
  22. Retry. Probably another EULA. Success.
  23. Child plays game
Literally, this is the process I went through to get Lego Horizon Adventures working on my kids PC via Steam. It was INSANE. I've been gaming my whole life and the way things have gone is just so depressing and so dystopian. It's a goddamn video game. I felt like I was trying to get a car loan!

Obviously the answer here is "just sign up as an adult" or better "don't buy Sony PC games," but this is the "proper" method that Sony wants their PC customers to follow. It's unhinged. I'm not the type of person to pick a specific game launcher or bandwagon hate on whatever is the hot topic to hate at the moment, but boy howdy did this experience make it plain to me how godawful things have gotten.

I'm thankful most purchases on Steam are NOT like this, but I'm going to be on the lookout for any future titles that are and avoid them like the plague.

Seriously, why are Japanese gaming companies to fucking awful when it comes to online? Pre-Steam FF14 basically required a walkthrough to buy the fucking game. Nintendo treats everyone like fucking toddlers.
 
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Baraka Obama said:
The Unfarted games are some of the earliest examples of AAA slop -- there's no discernible challenge, just go on extremely linear handholdy climbing section to cutscene to bullet sponge weak af enemy fest to cutscene to repeat until you're done the game.

IDK how anyone pretends those games were good, I guess compared to most early PS3 games like Haze and Lair they seemed incredible.

Cuckman of course said "hold my beer" and practically invented the moviegame.

Naughty Dogs in the Crash / Jak days were kino.
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The first Unsharted was ridiculed as handholding slop. It was the second game that was considered the good one and a lot of that was due to the PS3 slim releasing around the same time for $299. If only people would find out how much worse Naughty Dog would go from there.
 
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Super Hans v2 said:
Xmas is a legit alternative form for Christmas. The letter Greek letter X has been shorthand for Christ for the last 1000 years. And funny enough, it's where we get kike from. Illiterate Jews signed with a circle instead of an X because of that, and the Yiddish word for circle is kikel.

Thank you for attending my Christmas Special TedX talk.
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I get that, but it’s like the people who say “umm akshually they/them has been used as a singular pronoun for hundreds of years so it’s perfectly normal sweaty :)”; it’s technically accurate, but 90% of the people who say Xmas don’t know/care about that historical context and only use it as a way to avoid saying Christ.
 
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Chapalapachapa said:
Why the fuck games are more expensive on the psn store than on steam
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Been the way consoles make their money for the most part of a decade by now. Sell "cheap" hardware, at the same time sell overpriced software and charge users monthly just to access multiplayer content even though said users already pay for WIFI at their home and already buy said software. Also crack down on the used market being able to get games for cheap by just straight up having no way for physical media to interact with said console or to tie physical game keys to only 1 account for those that do.

Sony fell off hard after they stopped making trinitrons, turntables, walkmen (the good ones not the glorified ipods) and shit.
 
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Lone Star said:
What a depressing fucking Christmas pic. No Crash, no Jak and Daxter, just the most generic, blending-in type slop that even features a game that's not yet released.
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They think mascot platformers are "kiddie games" for children, and nu-Naughty Dog is ashamed of their past. They are now making deep games for grownups, ones where you fight a woman pretending to be a man who gets fucked by Druckmann's self insert in the ass and cinematic movie games with barely any gameplay. Next up, they will have everyone's favorite, a souls like with a bald mutt which, if the leaks are correct, has a story that's just a metaphor for Israel-Palestine conflict. So mature!
Nobody tell them that as much as Jak 2/3 still looked like mascot platformers for kids, these games got pretty real and dark in places. Arguably aged better than Last of Lesbians and the droll "bigot sandwiches" tier slop writing and characters.
 
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Celebrate Nite said:
So did they miss the news about astrobot being the hottest thing Sony has going for them now-a-days or something?
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Facing facts is for CHUDS, they WILL make a game with a bald mutt and you WILL like it because Naughty Dog knows what gamers want better than they do!
The Hardest R said:
I had more fun with the Crash and Jak games than anything since then.
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I will go a step further and argue that even villains in their older games, like Neo Cortex, are still better written and deeper than anything they made over the last 10 years. Jak 2/3 that I mentioned easily blow anything from Last of Us or Uncharted out of the water, the intro for these games alone will leave players with more intense emotions than anything from Last of Us 2(aside from the scene where Abby plays golf with Joel's head, and only because the players will be pissed at Naughty Dog more than Abby herself).
 
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Chapalapachapa said:
i bought a ps4 to try the uncharted and horizon zero games. i traded hzd for grand turismo and never went back to play the uncharted ones
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Sometimes I feel like I made a mistake buying a PS4 to watch Blu-ray movies. I hadn't played any video games seriously from 2004 until I decided to try out XCOM2 and after almost 15 years of being a total normie I got sucked back in.
 
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