Patrick Sean Tomlinson / @stealthygeek / "Torque Wheeler" / @RealAutomanic / Kempesh / Padawan v2.5 - "Conservative" sci-fi author with TDS, armed "drunk with anger management issues" and terminated parental rights, actual tough guy, obese, paid Quasi, paid thousands to be repeatedly unbanned from Twitter

[sweetie_squad_4_lyfe]

So THAT'S why he's so obsessed with making pepperoni out of them...

 

[Stupid Cunt]

Please find attached a police report from 2020 wherein Patrick gets beaten up by three black men who then stole his phone. The police never found these black men.

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How much of a gormless, unaware-of-your-surroundings NPC do you have to be to be so engrossed in your fucking phone to not notice three black men approaching you late at night? Fucking hell.

 

[NaggotFigger]

Heard about Rick beaten up by three niggers and then get his phone stolen outside Chubby Cheesesteak was so hysterical, I need to make this quick edit and have a guffaw on this fat faggot with bitch tits. Fucking coward

 

[Cane Skretteburg]

Isn't Milwaukee kinda known for its good cheese? You'd think they'd be able to make good cheesesteak then. But on the other hand, Chubby Patsteak wouldn't go to a good place. He doesn't care as long as it's cheap, greasy, and close to Hoolies.

Wrong as always, stalker. Using good cheese on a cheesesteak is sacrilegious to niggercattle cheesesteak enjoyers. Those people will tell you that Cheese Whiz is the best cheese to use. Cheese Whiz is actually a “cheese-flavored sauce”, because it cannot even legally be called cheese.

 

[AnOminous]

Of course Patrick makes a lolcow of the year push after voting has started. He's perfect

This is why he loses every year.

How much of a gormless, unaware-of-your-surroundings NPC do you have to be to be so engrossed in your fucking phone to not notice three black men approaching you late at night? Fucking hell.

He had STALKER CHILDS to deal with. He had to tell them how much they were going to ENJOY PRISON.

What are you, dumb?

Who hasn't had a $600 phone or whatever jacked out of their hand by a Negro who then ran away laughing?

I mean I haven't but obviously this is a really common occurrence. Surely most normal people have been drunk off their ass at 10:30 at night at Hoolies, gone over to get a 2000 calorie cheesesteak as a "snack," and then had a Negro rip their phone out of their hands because they were too busy saying "Goodbye child" to people on Twitter to pay attention to their surroundings.

Obviously, you should stand right outdoors with a $600 phone, in a literal ghetto environment, completely oblivious to your environment, because it is vastly important for you to tweet "Goodbye stalker" to 100 people in a row. Obviously nobody will just think "what is that fat retard doing maybe I can just steal his phone."

Getting robbed by a bunch of groids is pretty terrible.
But this is the shit fatrick screams and begs for so it’s hard to feel sympathy.

He went and hung out in ghetto groid land. Then he just flashed around his expensive phone. Paid no attention to his surroundings.

I have zero sympathy for someone so retarded he advertised himself as an obvious victim and then got what he had coming.

 

[Popper Whiting]

The police never found these black men.

They should try looking in the pepperoni section of the local supermarket

 

[Honka Honka Burning Love]

Of course Patrick makes a lolcow of the year push after voting has started. He's perfect

He is starting the chase for next year early..and will get 3 feet just like when he chased the Urban Youth's that stole his phone.

 

[Fields Of Rye]

All cheesesteaks are garbage. Fake cheese absolutely slathered on greasy shaved beef. Eating a cheesesteak is a negative indicator of intelligence, and it’s no wonder that they find their origin in that armpit of the United States known as Philadelphia.

So we’re just all in agreement Americans are like Koalas and if you disguise a burger by turning it sideways and shredding the patty they’d rather starve to death than eat it?

 

[Tiny Chinaman]

They should try looking in the pepperoni section of the local supermarket

*Nigger-ronni Section. Its usually in the "international aisle".

 

[Red Frida]

So we’re just all in agreement Americans are like Koalas and if you disguise a burger by turning it sideways and shredding the patty they’d rather starve to death than eat it?

No stalker child the cheese on a cheeseburger doesn't come out of a can. It's completely different. Enjoy prison.

 

[SSj_Ness (Yiffed)]

He's lucky to be alive, niggers are dangerous enough on their own but in a pack they're deadly.

 

[neger psykolog]

mfw the last 4 years of fatrick has just been some black guy who stole his phone using his Twitter account and roleplaying and copy/paste spamming "no stalker child it is you who will enjoy prison" while watching the insanity of this thread and the rest of the Internet while laughing

Think about it more: have you ever seen Patrick and a black mugger child in the same room? Where do you think the pepperoni meme comes from?

 

[reptile baht spaniard rid]

He went and hung out in ghetto groid land. Then he just flashed around his expensive phone. Paid no attention to his surroundings.

I think we’re missing some of the story. These are not negro children, small and succulent. These are almost men, of the type that import African gas for the Nikki.

Rick had made a threesome deal with them to aerate his wife’s “chubby cheesesteak” and when he proposed joining in so they could “spread the mayo” on his “steakbuns” they immediately stole his phone and ran screaming into the night.

 

[Trigger Me Timbers]

Oh baby chiiiiiiiild it really isnt that complicated

His obese pride was wounded, so rewriting the story in the public record as him simply deciding to upgrade a deficient tool lets him pretend it never happened

Sure he could just....not talk about it but you have to remember that he is extremely stupid and extremely fat

I’m pretty sure another reason why Fatrick didn’t cause a scene on Twitter was because this happened in the wake of the Saint George Floyd “good boi” Riots in May.

He still made a Police report, but kept suspiciously quiet about it. I could imagine that if this happened today or it was white guys, he would be on a 24/7 tweet ops, @‘in every law enforcement agency, crowd souring images from everyone who was there and posting his own investigative journalism about who stole his phone.
Snacky ‘Glovemitts’ Singh would be on cyber ops, accusing Vladimir Putin of orchestrating the great phone caper.

Instead, Pat, seething, having to wipe tears from his pigs slits and pretend be happy he has to buy another high end phone.

 

[Jonah Hill poster]

I guess calling “stalker child” to a bunch of mean mugging black men does not have the same kind of ring to it when he does that to Null.

 

[Joe_Welch]

I have this image of a sad, fat man, standing outside a shitty ghetto grease-trap. Panting and trembling, the shock of having been rendered airtight by three urban youths in such public fashion already weighing heavy on his mind and spirit.

The smell of off-brand cheese whizz mingles with the autumn air, and a single tear rolls down his fat cheek, as the sad, fat man, watches the three tweens, who just turned him out like a reversible jacket, scamper away into the night, shrieking excitedly, waving his phone in the air.

I can't stop laughing.

 

[JustStopDude]

I'm calling bullshit on Pat's story.

This is a man that tried to use his $900 phone on a scuba dive and then complained to the internet that it wasn't waterproof.

Much like when some broad drowns her kids in a tub and just blames a made-up black guy, Pat broke his phone, didn't want to admit the incident to his wife, and came up with a fake story.

I mean come on. Three black guys steal what is in effect, a real time tracking device. What, they were able to remove the fucking sim card instantly?

Knowing Pat, he accidentally flushed his own phone down the toilet trying to figure out where the poopy goes.

 

[Markorian]

Would Patrick be friends with the guys from RedLetterMedia?

Maybe AIDS moby, that guy's friends with movieblob.

 

[smug comporon]

They're lucky Pat restrained himself as he didn't want to bruise the meat.

 

[AnOminous]

I mean come on. Three black guys steal what is in effect, a real time tracking device. What, they were able to remove the fucking sim card instantly?

No, they take it to the rake, who does that and gives them their rocks.