🐷 Ethan Ralph's Twitter / Tweets - A collection of thoughts, insights and musings from the internet's favorite gunted hobbit

[Truly Rural]

With every bed in LA booked by locals fleeing their burning houses, best he can hope for is to find a shelter that will throw him a blanket for the night.

 

[Mr. Manchester]

With every bed in LA booked by locals fleeing their burning houses, best he can hope for is to find a shelter that will throw him a blanket for the night.

It's LA so Ralph can just pass out wherever he wants.

 

[jewsernotfound]

i will never understand how it's "an own" to drop dirt on people that you just severed ties on. the only thing it shows me is that you were friends with fucked up people that did fucked up things up until it didn't befit you any more. like...whoa...

 

[BlueArmedDevil]

Ralph, buddy. We aren't even halfway though the first month of the year. Maybe pump them breaks a little. You're gonna be all burnt up by April at this point.

 

[Sicko Hunter]

Ralph fatly pointing his greasy finger to his man wife who is towering over him in this photo always makes me laugh.

 

[Um...]

You've got to feel for Xander, probably excited to see his dad for the first time in what must seem like forever -

Lil Xannie doesn’t even know who he is, other than being told to call him ‘daddy.’ Ethan Ralph could disappear off the face of the earth tomorrow and the kid wouldn’t even notice.

and at best he's going to turn up hungover, in unclean clothes with cuts and scrapes all over him. If he keeps getting exposed to this he might end up with a complex.

Ralph is now in a full blown BPD spiral after being rejected by Dick, because Dick needs to make sure his pregnant girlfriend isn't exposed to a drug addict who sleeps in mexican airport bathrooms.

More like girlfriend found out Dax’s plans and said no I am NOT having that thing back in this house.

 

[AncientPhosphur]

It’s Ralph. All Dick has to do is say a few smooth words and Ralph will come crawling back on all four and his gunt to suck up to Dick because Ralph is a bitch.

 

[MadStan]

God bless the only marriage Ralph has had that has lasted.

 

[Cyberpunk Meta]

BURN EVERYTHING LIKE GASOLINE!

PIGGERTITS IS GOING SUPERNOVA!

BURN IT DOWN RALPHAMALE. ROAST THE DIDDLER, THE PEDO, AND THE CRACKHEAD WHO FED HIS DAUGHTER COCAINE!!

 

[Ratso Bronum]

It's LA so Ralph can just pass out wherever he wants.

There’s a whole neighborhood dedicated to people in his situation.

 

[Sam Losco]

Oh Ralph says he's going to drop dirt? He's never done that before! Let me sit here and F5 so I can catch it as soon as it happens!

 

[AncientPhosphur]

Yeah he’s not turning on Dick. Ralph is a bitch confirmed. He’s scared. Flaccid hollering at best.

 

[Mr. Manchester]

Yeah he’s not turning on Dick. Ralph is a bitch confirmed. He’s scared. Flaccid hollering at best.

View attachment 6843883

To be fair that is a correct answer, since theralphretort.com doesn't exist there's nowhere to put the asterisk anyway.

 

[Sammich]

Oh no, I think Ralph poked the bear..


lol, sorry, was too funny to not share.

 

[New & Improved Username]

There’s a whole neighborhood dedicated to people in his situation.

View attachment 6843864

Ralph Ave?

 

[Journoscum]

Ralph, did you discover what everyone else already knew? That Dax was never your friend and that he in fact encouraged you to do stupid things to give his show more content? He even wanted to monetize your rehab. A real friend would do that privately off camera.

You're no man's bish. Spill all of his dirty laundry. He's used you for years, time to use him for content now. I promise the paypigs will come out for a fuck Dax fest.

 

[Divorced Wifejak Groyper]

It's not possible he's turning on Juju... It's not scientifically possible, our models don't ever anticipate this, our prediction technology can't even factor it in....

it’s real and we need a Ralph vs Dick Masterson thread and it needs to be featured

 

[One Winged Pear Farmer]

It was just a work, kiwifags!

 

[Capt. Jean Luc Ritard]

this is boring. Go live faggot and show everyone who's the king.

 

[Toxidrome]

I don't buy this.
Over the last year Dax has made three successive (but unsuccessful) attempts to engineer kayfabe.
The Dax vs Vito "beef" apparently ended with Dax having a "human moment" according to the BPITU fans, real wholesome r/humansbeingbros episode.
The Riley vs Vito "beef" culminated with Riley and Vito awkwardly hugging each other while Dax filmed.
The Mint vs Vito "beef" is so unconvincing and forgettable that I can't even come up with a witty comment.
This is a lie, a fabrication, a fakeout, a "work" if you will.
Ralph would never say "Kiwifarms was right" and mean it.