Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

[AnOminous]

Unsure if he still owns it, but Jack has shown himself cooking with a Dutch oven before. I think it’s this one, by Lodge. Can’t be certain, since I’ve never seen it with the cover on.

Pretty sure it is. I have a red Lodge Dutch oven and it looks exactly like that. I got it because it was the cheapest I could find and wasn't sure I'd like a Dutch oven. Since then, I've used it constantly, though. At some point, I'll break down and get a Le Creuset or maybe something slightly cheaper and less memeworthy. Max Miller has one of those.

Lodge stuff is actually functional even if not particularly high quality, but with a Dutch oven, it sucks when the enamel job is so crappy it flakes off. So far none of the cooking surfaces have suffered, so when that eventually happens is when I'll replace it.

I'm quite fond of the Amish-style macaroni salads I've tried; and will usually make a batch a day ahead of any time I cook a brisket or tri-tip. I like to use ditalini, red onion and bell pepper, celery, a small amount of sweet relish, several diced, boiled eggs, and a dressing emphasizing mustard and paprika more than mayonnaise.

I'm a fan of Amish macaroni salad, and for that matter, Amish food in general. It's pretty heavy on the mayo, though, so if you don't like mayo, you probably won't like Amish macaroni salad.

An alternative would be the mayo-free farfalle (bowtie) pasta salad which is heavy on the vinegar.

They also make a good vinegar-forward three bean salad (wax beans green beans and kidney beans).

Fatty would 110% watch Bible Black and bitch about it

He is exactly the kind of fat douchebag who would watch the entirety of a notorious porno and then complain that it had porn in it.

 

[Super Hans v2]

In his livestream this morning on YouTube, someone asked him in the chat what being Amish is. 'Is it like the same as Jewish?' Jack paused for a moment, and then said, kind of, and that he thinks that a long time ago, Jewish and Amish were basically the same thing. I can't with this guy!

Jack's a dispensationialist, so the WBC and Reform Judiasm might as well be the same.

 

[AnOminous]

Please for the love of God stop talking about Jack's feces. His food is bad enough.

Id like to imagine that one of the things that brings a lot of people to jacks thread is a genuine love of food and cooking. Because if you do, jacks videos are so much worse and crazier to watch. Prime rage fuel and I enjoy everyone always saying good things about food and cooking in the thread as a reminder that white trash American living is not the norm.

Edit: I found out about Jack over a decade ago now on /ck/ and I suspect others have found him through looking up a recipe or a bad cooking blog.

I've literally learned a fair amount about cooking not just from this thread but from ja/ck/ threads in ancient history, partly from "whatever Jack is doing don't do that" and partly from people who actually knew what he was doing was wrong, why it was wrong, and how to do it right.

Rob Milanowski's videos are sort of a low-key, mellow version of this.

This is all moot because ghee shouldn't be used to make pemmican. It's not as shelf-stable, and additionally will be soft at room temperature (unlike the traditional tallow) which defeats the point of preserving your meat in the first place.

And here I was wondering how is it even possible to fuck up pemmican. Achievement unlocked.

 

[Doctor of Autism]

At least Jack likes a good movie for once

 

[Super Hans v2]

At least Jack likes a good movie for once

View attachment 6846374

I wish that he could be honest for once in his life. "No niggers, fags, cursing, or nudity. Automatic A+."

 

[Tiresome]

He is exactly the kind of fat douchebag who would watch the entirety of a notorious porno and then complain that it had porn in it.

"And um, it had no seggs you guys, so it's okay for da whole fabily, and maybe a little polidicul, but not too bad...."

Meanwhile, Our Boy Rob back with his low-key, amiable mockery of a guaranteed Jack rage.

 

[p1138]

"And um, it had no seggs you guys, so it's okay for da whole fabily, and maybe a little polidicul, but not too bad...."

Meanwhile, Our Boy Rob back with his low-key, amiable mockery of a guaranteed Jack rage.

Fucking Rob... lol. God damned hash browns immediately made me think of Fatty saying it like a space alien trying to speak English.

 

[Falcon Sebben]

In his livestream this morning on YouTube, someone asked him in the chat what being Amish is. 'Is it like the same as Jewish?' Jack paused for a moment, and then said, kind of, and that he thinks that a long time ago, Jewish and Amish were basically the same thing. I can't with this guy!

Well he's not completely wrong.

Proto-Christians were basically just Jews who followed a different guy. So a long time ago Christians and Jews were basically the same thing.

But by the time Christianity started the similarities between them changed.

 

[semitooth]

At least Jack likes a good movie for once

View attachment 6846374

how does he even manage to download these movie posters in such low resolution? every. time.

edit to avoid double posting: retard is live-

jack just said, verbatim "my health's good" LOL

 

[She Brings The Rain]

WHAT IS PEMMICAN?​

(01/10/25)

Original:

Preserve Tube: https://preservetube.com/watch?v=qcqlGFuB30A

Spoiler: Local Archive

View attachment 6843634

Something about Jack gurgling "GEDDOWNN-UH" at Jenny really ticked me off. She's obviously not used to being at Fatty's house, because compare her behaviour to Jack's dogs. Her tail is up and wagging, she's smiling and energetic, meanwhile Jack's dogs are silent and slinking around with their tails down. Jack definitely yells at his dogs for every little thing and probably hits them. Also, why is Jr buying another dog when he just got rid of the two labs?

That food is definitely meant to get calories in you and nothing else, so I don't know why any of them expected anything else. Jack liking it tracks. And holy shit , he hasn't had a fruit in over a year? I can tell when I haven't had enough fresh fruit recently because I'll just start craving it. Not even the natural sugars, my body just wants a piece of fucking fruit.

 

[ZipDisk]

Max Miller's home is in danger.
It should be Jack.

 

[AnOminous]

That food is definitely meant to get calories in you and nothing else, so I don't know why any of them expected anything else.

It's literally something invented by Injuns to have something to carry around with a long shelf-life and be able to eat at any time. Basically an Injun MRE.

Making it with ghee is retarded and guarantees it will go rancid far sooner. Jack is so absolutely fucking retarded he literally believes ghee is beef tallow.

That said, you can make pemmican tastier by putting stuff like juniper berries in it or other spices and herbs. That's what the Injuns also did.

Also, remember, Jack is so fucking stupid he thought it made sense to substitute blueberries for juniper berries. Just a literal brain-damaged moron.

 

[ILikeYou]

how does he even manage to download these movie posters in such low resolution? every. time.

edit to avoid double posting: retard is live-

View attachment 6847363
jack just said, verbatim "my health's good" LOL

Why is this podcast or whatever of theirs called ''F' as in Frank'?

 

[AnOminous]

Why is this podcast or whatever of theirs called ''F' as in Frank'?

Because he couldn't bring himself to just call it what it is. "F" as in "FAG."

 

[Mechanical Pencil]

Lodge stuff is actually functional even if not particularly high quality

Lodge is good value, and I recommend their carbon steel pans. My 10" is a fucking workhorse in my kitchen. Yeah, a full clad stainless would be an amazing replacement, but it'd also cost me way more than the twenty I threw at Lodge.

 

[p1138]

Why is this podcast or whatever of theirs called ''F' as in Frank'?

Fatty has explained this, and the retarded explanation is as follows:
He remembered his mother speaking on the phone, and when having to spell out things phonetically used names like plenty of people do and for whatever reason Fatty found her saying "F as in Frank" to be so fucking hilarious that he named the podcast after it.

Yes, this means he may as well have named it "A as in Adam", "P as in Peter", "R as in Robert", etc.

 

[Falcon Sebben]

Fatty has explained this, and the retarded explanation is as follows:
He remembered his mother speaking on the phone, and when having to spell out things phonetically used names like plenty of people do and for whatever reason Fatty found her saying "F as in Frank" to be so fucking hilarious that he named the podcast after it.

Yes, this means he may as well have named it "A as in Adam", "P as in Peter", "R as in Robert", etc.

That's F as in "Fucking Retarded".

 

[p1138]

That's F as in "Fucking Retarded".

I'm serious, he's stated as much a few times. Here he is explaining it back in 2013, timestamped

https://www.youtube.com/live/rqpJJeiIVWM?si=a_LGtkjPu9lnv3qi&t=2045

 

[REGENDarySumanai]

Something about Jack gurgling "GEDDOWNN-UH" at Jenny really ticked me off. She's obviously not used to being at Fatty's house, because compare her behaviour to Jack's dogs. Her tail is up and wagging, she's smiling and energetic, meanwhile Jack's dogs are silent and slinking around with their tails down. Jack definitely yells at his dogs for every little thing and probably hits them. Also, why is Jr buying another dog when he just got rid of the two labs?

That food is definitely meant to get calories in you and nothing else, so I don't know why any of them expected anything else. Jack liking it tracks. And holy shit , he hasn't had a fruit in over a year? I can tell when I haven't had enough fresh fruit recently because I'll just start craving it. Not even the natural sugars, my body just wants a piece of fucking fruit.

That said, you can make pemmican tastier by putting stuff like juniper berries in it or other spices and herbs. That's what the Injuns also did.

Pemmican can be used to make rubaboo.

 

[mawrieposter]

Her tail is up and wagging, she's smiling and energetic, meanwhile Jack's dogs are silent and slinking around with their tails down. Jack definitely yells at his dogs for every little thing and probably hits them

It didn't occur to me until recently but something about Jack irks me. Like you look at a person and feel that there's this strange aura of depression and gloom around them. That's what I now feel whenever I look at Jack. Autism or something instinctive? I imagine plant life just wilting and dying when he walks by, like in a cartoon

Jack is so fucking stupid he thought it made sense to substitute blueberries for juniper berries

Would've been better if he used .45s instead of juniper berries