🐷 Ethan Ralph's Twitter / Tweets - A collection of thoughts, insights and musings from the internet's favorite gunted hobbit

[Trigger Me Timbers]

Spineless, sniveling worm prostrating himself before his Master.
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It was all a work!

God, it’s so pathetic that even when he’s trying to make it look like a work he still can’t hide his contempt that daddy Dick doesn’t care about him getting sober and just cares about the “comedy“ in it.

Ralph, I don’t know how you’ve gotten to your age but still need to be told this. You’re nothing to Daddy Dick.

You are an infrequent play thing that Juju will pickup and play with if it rolls onto his lap but you’re just as quickly discarded.

No Ralph, you can’t go to the Barbie dream mansion. You’re a fire hazard. You’re nothing but high proof booze, grease and fat. You’ll go up like a Christmas tree and threaten Dick‘s comfy life if you catch on fire or beat his forever girlfriend who he spent a fortune on getting IVF treatment so they can spite nature and have a child.

 

[Blue Miaplacidus]

*bouncher

*bouncher bouncher

 

[Near]

>Challenges a guy to another no-show

Nobody cares. Get new material.

 

[Mr E. Grifter]

God, it’s so pathetic that even when he’s trying to make it look like a work he still can’t hide his contempt that daddy Dick doesn’t care about him getting sober and just cares about the “comedy“ in it.

Ralph, I don’t know how you’ve gotten to your age but still need to be told this. You’re nothing to Daddy Dick.

You are an infrequent play thing that Juju will pickup and play with if it rolls onto his lap but you’re just as quickly discarded.

No Ralph, you can’t go to the Barbie dream mansion. You’re a fire hazard. You’re nothing but high proof booze, grease and fat. You’ll go up like a Christmas tree and threaten Dick‘s comfy life if you catch on fire or beat his forever girlfriend who he spent a fortune on getting IVF treatment so they can spite nature and have a child.

Even if we concede for a moment that Dick considered Ralph a friend at one point, it is pretty normal for people to drift apart when one person remains a stunted man-child as everyone around them moves on. Dick himself is stunted, probably just catching up in maturity to people about 10 years his junior, but he's got a house and he's got a child on the way - he has priorities in life that don't involve fat drunk retards hosting a screaming match around them at the drop of a hat.

People grow up and move on, and this is something that Ralph has never been capable of doing. They say that people stop maturing when they become an addict, which explains why so many long-term addicts are so emotionally immature.

 

[LiquidChrisRespecter]

Not remembering he was the one yelling at Milo? Like 3 days ago?

That was a WERK, A-lawg!

I'm loving all these "manic" portrait videos where he screams incoherently in random locations at whoever he's decided he's upset with today and can't figure out where the stop recording button is. People who don't have water on the brain would at least snip the last few seconds off before posting.

He'll probably forget why he was even upset if/when he gets to the smouldering remains of LA.

Come on grandpa, let's get you to bed.

 

[Bill Evans 45]

Two new videos:

He's still fried. He was sober 44 days? El oh fucking el.

Love that second video. "Dude. This...." >hard cut<

And yet he still uploaded it.

Oh and guys? I love you all but it is 2025. I give him three years from today's date. It's a slow start with organ failure, but then it gets very bad very fast.

 

[Farmer9876]

Fuck you John Potter you bish, your dick doesn't work and I am totally gonna be alive this whole year, just you see, gonna walk 2 miles right now just to spite you bish

 

[Necrosan]

Unless he actually tries to kill himself, I don't believe he'll die. He is self-destructive, sure, but he is too much of a pussy and loves the attention. We'll see him getting wheeled to and from dialysis with a speak-n-spell tweeting about Jewsh before we ever see an obituary.

 

[MadStan]

Having been a bouncer a long time ago, these marks are a classic tell of a guy who was taken to the floor on one side and held down, the victims always try and turn their head to yell at the guy taking them down, and it often causes abrasions on the side of the face against the floor, and this usually happens on concrete surfaces.

Of course, not to doubt Ralphs side of the story, this could also be from a left-handed dominant cat. :-)

 

[LiquidChrisRespecter]

If he's lucky, he might get his pig slits evened out on this trip.

Gee, Ralph! How come your mom lets you have two fractured orbitals???

 

[Truly Rural]

Forgive me for asking stupid questions but what exactly did Vito do to Ralph. Milo called him piggertits, and showed real time clip of Sandra burning in hell proving that Sandra would rather take calls from flaming homo than her own son.

Dax said Ralph is a shitshow about to die, that he is not worth even thinking about. Vito tmk just agreed to meet him for a meal and on the podcast didn't say nothing really insulting or offensive toward Ralph.

 

[buttmunch]

This is it. He's dead by the end of the year. Not remembering he was the one yelling at Milo? Like 3 days ago? He's toast. He's been doing nothing but drugs in Mexico for months.

do you even have time for the 30 hour person stream on Ethan Ralph anymore though?

 

[Schpoots]

That's a common ralphamale tactic. If you piss him off but he's scared of you he'll go after someone nearby that's easier. Dick made him angy but dick is his daddy so he's going for vito instead.

 

[ddlloo]

Vito was also the only one really communicating with Ralph, because Dax was supposedly busy with his real work and a friend who had lost their house in the fire, so Ralph was shooting the messenger as much as anything else. Plus he will never not be salty about Vito getting the cohost chair, not that Ralph will admit that.

Vito handled him well. Told him he's not going to entertain his tantrum and that they can do something when Ralph calms down and sobers up.

 

[Bixnood]

Mark my words, Ralph lacks the spine to keep up this beef with Juju.
soon the ralphaknee shall bend to his master, a man whom gets fucked in the ass while dressed as a cow. Sad. Pathetic.

 

[OrionBalls]

I might have missed something, sorry. Is he going to see his son, or not? Did he miss his appointment due to his drunken bullshit, again?

 

[MadStan]

Mark my words, Ralph lacks the spine to keep up this beef with Juju.
soon the ralphaknee shall bend to his master, a man whom gets fucked in the ass while dressed as a cow. Sad. Pathetic.

Number of times Ralph has declared he would physically take on someone/destroy their reputation/make a career ending reveal: 1,237 times

Number of times Ralph has carried through: 0

Number of times Ralph becomes the victim of himself and ends up losing: 1, 237

 

[BoomerPrime]

Unless he actually tries to kill himself, I don't believe he'll die. He is self-destructive, sure, but he is too much of a pussy and loves the attention. We'll see him getting wheeled to and from dialysis with a speak-n-spell tweeting about Jewsh before we ever see an obituary.

He won't actively try to kill himself. As others have said he's an extreme narcissist and a coward to boot. But the way he's treating drugs and booze as food groups, it won't shock anyone if he at some point ODs, or his organs just say "fuck this" and peace out, taking the Gunt with them.

 

[Mr E. Grifter]

I might have missed something, sorry. Is he going to see his son, or not? Did he miss his appointment due to his drunken bullshit, again?

He said he got up early, but that he got there at the wrong time. Then made some passing comment about how long it took to get through the border crossing into San Diego.

While it is unclear if he has seen Xander my guess is that he hasn't. Turning up at the wrong time would not be a problem if you got there early, it would just be annoying, you would just need to hang around until your allotted time. Additionally, it looks like he has been on a multi-day bender, usually visitation would require someone to be sober - or close enough to pass as sober - and in his current state there is no way they would give him supervised access. Plus, you can bet that Faith is watching his timeline - maybe even this thread - and could easily pass on the info to relevant people.

The most telling part in all of this, at least to me, is the fact Ralph hasn't posted about seeing Xander. He usually gloats to tell us Xander called him daddy, gave him a hug, all the usual stuff. If it wasn't for the fact it was Ralph, it would be quiet wholesome.

What does this mean for future visitation, I was always under the impression that fucking up can lead to losing visitation rights entirely - although to be fair to Ralph, he has not managed to fuck up this badly so far...- or until something is sorted out again down the line. Will Ralph be willing to do that again?

 

[Truly Rural]

There is no question mark but let's assume Jonny offered Ralph a ride if he needed it. Wonder if he ever picked him up. Or maybe he just meant to remind Ralph that he indeed needs a ride. Regardless, how reckless of Ralph to just accept random stranger's invitation to hop in their car.