Zinnia Jones / Satana Kennedy / Zachary Antolak / Zack Sklar / Lauren McNamara/Soersdal / @zjemptv - Queen of the Horse Dildos and Defender of Rapists; Transtrender Posing as a Transmedicalist; Dropped out of College after Falling in a Shallow River; Balls-free since 2024

[Stinkyboy]

What a retard; there's kids toothpaste that isn't minty.

 

[Tragi-Chan]

If toothbrushes are disposable he still won't brush his teeth. He's rule-lawyering like a 6 year old.

“Toothbrushes are disgusting and unhygienic!” says the man whose teeth are rotting out, whose gums bleed when he talks and whose breath smells like actual shit.

 

[Autistic Nonetheless]

Zach looks for clinical trials that demonstrate the benefit of... brushing one's teeth.

This why I keep coming back to Zach as a unique and interesting cow.

This is functional autism at its best. Zach reminds me so much of a IRL guy I used to know who would not wear dyed pants because he was convinced it leached in toxins through his butthole.

 

[Aunt Carol]

People broke him. Now Zach resolves to brush his teeth more! He even look for journal articles to see how it is done!

"I'm intuitively sure that the fluids we drink already do 95% of the work of clearing everything away."

Emphasis mine. What happened to Captain Autism who almost got an associate's degree and has to read 1k-page nuclear engineering reports for the tiniest bit of stimulation, unlike us normies? Now we're back to feels. Get some plaque candies and test it yourself, goofball. Surprising he hasn't found his way to "oil pulling" yet. What about miswaks, for that "100 years [sic] of oppression by Big Toothbrush?"

On the one hand I viscerally dislike the new Oral Hygiene Truther arc, but at the same time, it's absolutely hilarious. Especially because he's making this a moral issue, like he's Toothbrushing Hesitant. Toothbrushing Skeptical. Everyone was ass-patting Zach on his kayak angst, only a few people were reasonably explaining the fringe festival entry pins to him, but "toothbrushing is fake and unnecessary" is on track to getting pushback.

Anyway, yet more bioessentialist proof that Zach isn't a woman: he sucks at shopping! Non-mint fluoridated toothpaste is only slightly more expensive/scarce while the Internet is still around. @Accept Only Substitutes can back me up on this.

 

[Accept Only Substitutes]

"I'm intuitively sure that the fluids we drink already do 95% of the work of clearing everything away."

Emphasis mine. What happened to Captain Autism who almost got an associate's degree and has to read 1k-page nuclear engineering reports for the tiniest bit of stimulation, unlike us normies? Now we're back to feels. Get some plaque candies and test it yourself, goofball. Surprising he hasn't found his way to "oil pulling" yet. What about miswaks, for that "100 years [sic] of oppression by Big Toothbrush?"

On the one hand I viscerally dislike the new Oral Hygiene Truther arc, but at the same time, it's absolutely hilarious. Especially because he's making this a moral issue, like he's Toothbrushing Hesitant. Toothbrushing Skeptical. Everyone was ass-patting Zach on his kayak angst, only a few people were reasonably explaining the fringe festival entry pins to him, but "toothbrushing is fake and unnecessary" is on track to getting pushback.

Anyway, yet more bioessentialist proof that Zach isn't a woman: he sucks at shopping! Non-mint fluoridated toothpaste is only slightly more expensive/scarce while the Internet is still around. @Accept Only Substitutes can back me up on this.
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hismile makes amazing non-mint flavors for $11/tube, which sounds expensive but the pump only dispenses a tiny amount of toothpaste so they last forever. They have a very wide variety too, but some flavors are rather underwhelming. I recommend the red velvet if you like cream cheese frosting, it's got the most vibrant flavor of the ones I've tried. Plus it's bright red and that's fun.

Tasty paste is great too, the chocolate is fun. Hismile is available at CVS though, I could only find tasty paste on Amazon.

 

[AnOminous]

Tasty paste is great too, the chocolate is fun. Hismile is available at CVS though, I could only find tasty paste on Amazon.

My personal non-mint toothpaste is Boka.

It's also nano-hydroxyapatite instead of fluoride if you're an anti-fluoride person. I don't get it for that. I'll note it's labeled "for kids" but that's barely visible. I didn't even notice that. I usually follow up with a mild fluoride mouthwash.

 

[Sean Andalou]

Especially because he's making this a moral issue, like he's Toothbrushing Hesitant. Toothbrushing Skeptical.

All around personal hygiene skeptical I expect.
It's said to be next to Godliness, and you know mere atheism is nowhere near edgy enough any more.

 

[Trombonista]

Zach's entire personality is "Fuck you, Mom and Dad," isn't it?

 

[Not Dr. Evil]

Here is more of that 213 IQ material.

 

[Doktor Grimm]

I'd like to highlight this prime Zachism amid the dental hygiene discussion.

The common fool says "I wish this short-form video platform wasn't harvesting my data." The enlightened one says "I wish this data harvesting platform wasn't showing me short-form videos. I just want the CCP to see my nudes."

There is truly no position he will not take to satisfy his ODD.

 

[Surfin Terf]

"I'm intuitively sure that the fluids we drink already do 95% of the work of clearing everything away."

Emphasis mine. What happened to Captain Autism who almost got an associate's degree and has to read 1k-page nuclear engineering reports for the tiniest bit of stimulation, unlike us normies? Now we're back to feels. Get some plaque candies and test it yourself, goofball. Surprising he hasn't found his way to "oil pulling" yet. What about miswaks, for that "100 years [sic] of oppression by Big Toothbrush?"

Even if the drinking fluids does do 95% of the cleaning, it's that 5% that's relevant. The sky precipitates out the vast majority of greenhouse gasses, that doesn't disprove the greenhouse effect because what remains is what's relevant. Gravity pulls 95% of the poop from my butthole, doesn't mean that I don't have to wipe off the remaining 5% afterwards.

It's great that we don't develop an inch-thick layer of food on our teeth every day, but the bacteria that produce the acids which decay teeth don't need much in order to thrive.

By the way, does the non-mint toothpaste still leave your mouth with the same clean feeling afterwards? I don't have a problem with mint toothpaste, but some of these other flavors sound good.

 

[Positron]

You know it is not about the mint. This fucker loves to boast how much hot sauce he can tolerate and now he tells us mint gives him prickly-wicklies?

Thoughts: does Zach insist on wearing masks because he enjoys the smell of his breath?

---

No I'm not weird! YOU are the weird ones!!!



UN Sustainable Development Goals. These are not personal resolutions.

Apparently conscience is a side effect of cPTSD. Zach resolves to tell his conscience to go fuck itself.


Zach gave up aspirations; he plans to live for today.


Black-and-white autism


Space-X

What Zach links to is an archive of the NYT article "Wildlife Protections Take a Back Seat to SpaceX’s Ambitions"

---

Zach is pro-plastic straws because some 9 year old claimed, probably erroneously, that America uses 500 million plastic straws each day. Link to the NYT article in his tweet.

Perhaps he can start a campaign that accidental ingestion of discarded toothbrushes kills 100 snakes a day.

OK now that Heather is out, let me bring back this recent tweet, which gains new resonance with what we just learned about Zach.

Right, when Heather wrote this, she was not thinking about Zach at all.

 

[Aunt Carol]

Gravity pulls 95% of the poop from my butthole, doesn't mean that I don't have to wipe off the remaining 5% afterwards.

It's so sweet of you to use an example Zach is so familiar with.

By the way, does the non-mint toothpaste still leave your mouth with the same clean feeling afterwards? I don't have a problem with mint toothpaste, but some of these other flavors sound good.

Yes; it's the brushing that does it more than mint, I think. Although the HiSmile non-mint toothpastes don't have mint but mostly do have menthol in them, so you get the "clean and cold" aftertaste but not the mint taste. It's like that self-cooling Sprite flavor that came out last year.

Spoiler: not a Special Interest I swear I'm just a consoomer

I really, really like the HiSmile Cola flavor, which is actually a toothpaste flavored like the ChupaChups that are flavored like cola. I'm not big on soda pop but I like cola flavor, so this is perfect for me. HiSmile toothpastes are much cheaper if you buy choose-your-own flavor multipacks; they try to sell you on their montly toothpaste club, too, but you gotta have a whole polycule of people who like interesting toothpaste to go through it that quickly.

The HiSmile chocolate flavor is amazing. You know how most chocolate-flavored non-chocolate things taste like scratch-and-sniff chocolate smells? It doesn't. And it's a disconcerting brown color on the brush. Perfect.

HiSmile made their licorice toothpaste limited edition, for some reason, so if you like licorice I recommend looking for Marvis--they have a Licorice and an Anis flavor, just note the difference between their fluoride and non-fluoride toothpaste labels is in very small print. Marvis also has a Jasmine that's actually a Jasmine-Mint, but it's a good blend, like a minty herbal tea. Marvis Rhubarb mostly tastes like fruit, though; it's nice, but not very rhubarby. Disappointing; not enough rhubarb out there in flavorland.

Zach is pro-plastic straws because some 9 year old claimed, probably erroneously, that America uses 500 million plastic straws each day

Not to get into fanfic territory, but I'm not surprised that a guy who never brushes his teeth and is making installments to an oral surgeon doesn't like to drink without a straw.

 

[Sourceress]

Zach reminds me so much of a IRL guy I used to know who would not wear dyed pants because he was convinced it leached in toxins through his butthole.

He reminds me of the guys in all those sad social media tales from wives whose husbands refuse to wipe their asses and leave skidmarks in every pair of underwear because they're too lazy and disgusting to bother wiping or think it would make them "gay" tbh.

This toothbrushing saga is so grosssss. Guys, I can't do it. It's just too disgusting. Like... I can get it if your oral hygiene is shit because of outside issues like poverty or growing up in a family that didn't prioritize and/or couldn't afford dental care, I truly do, because oral hygiene is a skill you learn and the people who mostly teach you how to do it (or how to do it right, anyway) cost a fortune and aren't covered by most normal health insurance. But that's not the case here, Zach is just a lazy slob who doesn't want to put the effort in.

Imagine how Heather's actually autistic kids who have probably been made to brush their teeth by their mum since they were old enough to hold a toothbrush feel when Zach the self-diagnosed bullshitter starts screeching that he can't brush his teeth because the minty flavor is activating his autism. Fuck's sake.

 

[Stinkyboy]

hismile makes amazing non-mint flavors for $11/tube, which sounds expensive but the pump only dispenses a tiny amount of toothpaste so they last forever. They have a very wide variety too, but some flavors are rather underwhelming. I recommend the red velvet if you like cream cheese frosting, it's got the most vibrant flavor of the ones I've tried. Plus it's bright red and that's fun.

Tasty paste is great too, the chocolate is fun. Hismile is available at CVS though, I could only find tasty paste on Amazon.

Don't they still have bubble gum flavoured toothpaste? That's what I used to use when I was like 5.

 

[The Taco Santo!]

If Zack loses any more teeth, he's really going to start looking like arseface.

 

[Sean Andalou]

If Zack loses any more teeth, he's really going to start looking like arseface.

He's already a good candidate for yanking them all and getting full dentures.

 

[AnOminous]

Gravity pulls 95% of the poop from my butthole, doesn't mean that I don't have to wipe off the remaining 5% afterwards.

Troons don't do that.

 

[Positron]

Zach lives large, and he brushes his teeth in style. Not your el cheapo prole products for him!

I presume SDG is United Nation's Sustainable Development Goals, which Zach discovered yesterday and role plays with it.


Why would he worry? Hasn't he concluded Dentistry is bunk?

Brushing his teeth is like putting his hand on a hot stove.



Why does he think he has to brush his teeth in front of the mirror? And given his frequency of taking selfies, I think he loves seeing himself.


I cannot confirm that the mob gathered for the sake of a dead troon, but there are so many dolled up people among the vandals that it is definitely unusual.

---

Deep thoughts



There was a sperg called DeBoss in TVTropes who hated Shakespeare with a passion. If spergs indeed had an aversion to Shakespeare, I doubt it is because the language is unfamiliar to modern readers; spergs and troons love to invent new words to stump normies, or else they are obsessed with artificial languages like Klingon.

 

[AnOminous]

Brushing his teeth is like putting his hand on a hot stove.

This useless faggot thinks brushing his teeth, which might save him a lifetime of pain, or it might have before he turned his mouth into a trench of death, is somehow similar to putting a hand on a hot stove.

What an absolutely mentally retarded idiot.

[THIS IS WHAT DISEASED TROONS ACTUALLY BELIEVE.]

Why does he think he has to brush his teeth in front of the mirror? And given his frequency of taking selfies, I think he loves seeing himself.

I don't think he does. Imagine looking in the mirror and seeing this filthy creature. It's more of a motivator to swallow the business end of a Glock and pull the trigger.