Patrick Sean Tomlinson / @stealthygeek / "Torque Wheeler" / @RealAutomanic / Kempesh / Padawan v 2.5 - "Conservative" sci-fi author with TDS, armed "drunk with anger management issues" and terminated parental rights, actual tough guy, obese, paid Quasi, paid thousands to be repeatedly unbanned from Twitter

[rusty shackleford 1]

Apparently badger has no life, what with his tiny daughter and loving wife with a sense of humor as great as her beefers. Patrick is so jealous of him lol.



If people were talking about me and my wife like this I’d probably get a flip phone and cancel the WiFi for a while lol. He has absolutely no shame, saying nothing is infinitely better than barging in to derrrrr enjoy prison nerrrrr, he comes across as a literal pants shitting retard.



Jesus Christ, Pat.

 

[Divine right to rule]

Everybody is getting hyped for ConFusion
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Edit: Pat accidentally tells the truth
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The seldom seen Unaware Self-aware Pat.

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A man tells Patrick to stop pestering him because he did not vote for Trump. But Pat knows best:
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It fucking slays me that he still, years later, seriously thinks that Boomia's real name is "Robert Prongay, son of infamous mob hitman", and uses the name on him as if it is a totally epic doxxx own.

 

[Exit fullscreen button]

It fucking slays me that he still, years later, seriously thinks that Boomia's real name is "Robert Prongay, son of infamous mob hitman", and uses the name on him as if it is a totally epic doxxx own.

Little known fatrick fact, but he was cursed by a trickster god that if he were to ever admit a mistake or that he was wrong, he would be struck by lightning on the spot.

 

[Gentlebastard]

Is this a genius 1.2 GPA move? When someone threatens to murder you, you send them a picture of your dick?

Yes. People can't stab you if they're breathless from laughing at your tiny, faucet-shaped dick, as the Tao of Tomlinson teaches us.

 

[FinnSven]

Did he even read the offending Xeet? Oinkerson claimed Patrick sent unsolicited dick pics, and Patrick claimed it was in response to death threats. Is this a genius 1.2 GPA move? When someone threatens to murder you, you send them a picture of your dick?

It could be a bold move to intimidate the threatener?
“I am so unafraid of your death threats, I will show you my dick”.

It might weird out some people and cause them to have second thoughts.

Not the pests though, they love to laugh at his small penis.

 

[grapeshark77]

Pat just dropped an official explanation for his random 3-5am enjoy prison tweets:



"write for able bit".

 

[OffTopic]

Pat just dropped an official explanation for his random 3-5am enjoy prison tweets:

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"write for able bit".

I love when Science Rick cherry picks pop psychology articles that validate his poor habits.

He tweeted about this years ago that this sleep pattern was genetic and could be traced back to cave men, and they were the Nightwatchmen who protected the rest of the tribe.

Sure, Rick. It's not due to your alcoholism, high blood pressure, poor diet, lack of exercise, screen addiction, anxiety and rage. It's a superpower.

 

[FinnSven]

Sure, Rick. It's not due to your alcoholism, high blood pressure, poor diet, lack of exercise, screen addiction, anxiety and rage. It's a superpower.

In fact, alcoholism is just a symptom of being able to take far more poisons than normal people, his blood pressure is a result of the sheer intensity of his life, it’s not a poor diet, he is able to digest anything due to his highly efficient metabolism, he exercised so much before that he no longer needs to exercise, he is required to monitor the movements of fascists, stalkers and all other enemies of society, it’s not anxiety and rage, it’s awareness and justified anger!

Anything is a superpower with the right mental gymnastics.

 

[rusty shackleford 1]

I’m sure this is just more special boy being special and nothing to do with his obvious alcoholism that famously disrupts the sleep cycle.

 

[MilkThePig]

Was reminded of this in a recent Owen thread and it might be my all time favorite Patty exchange with a stalker child...

 

[Maude Snew]

I love when Science Rick cherry picks pop psychology articles that validate his poor habits.

He tweeted about this years ago that this sleep pattern was genetic and could be traced back to cave men, and they were the Nightwatchmen who protected the rest of the tribe.

Sure, Rick. It's not due to your alcoholism, high blood pressure, poor diet, lack of exercise, screen addiction, anxiety and rage. It's a superpower.

When you're unemployed and have nothing to do but xeet all day time becomes pretty much meaningless anyway, is it three in the morning, Tuesday, or December? Who the fuck knows, who cares, grab another pepperoni, treat yourself to some beers Niki's mom paid for, fuse with your fart couch and get to childing.

 

[TurboNAS]

Patrick should finish up In the Red and get it published on Amazon to bring a few bucks in. Since it’s a trilogy, go write the final piece and publish that as well. In the meantime he can talk up how much he appreciates-

Wait. Critical error. Patrick praising someone other than himself? Never mind. I guess the literary world will have to always wonder what could have been.

 

[Divine right to rule]

Was reminded of this in a recent Owen thread and it might be my all time favorite Patty exchange with a stalker child...

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It is astounding that a man that is absolutely unable to say something witty or INTENTIONALLY funny thought he had the potential to be a stand-up comic.

 

[In the Sick of It]

 

[reptile baht spaniard rid]

Rick is just such a fucking bad writer, holy shit. A tweet has 125 characters or so, and he can't get them right.

His catchphrase is perhaps the best thing he's ever written. Hey, here's another interpretation, this time Churchill!

"And so, dear fellow, we find that your future is already a shadow of the past, your fate sealed in the cold grip of justice. Enjoy the company of your prison walls, for they will be your only solace henceforth."

 

[RollingRock2]

Pat just dropped an official explanation for his random 3-5am enjoy prison tweets:

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"write for able bit".

These are just symptoms of sleep apnea (choking on your own fat neck)
But is Fat at risk? Let's ask the internet

Fat Rick thinks he is a night watchman when he is just too fat to breathe while laying down

 

[( ◠‿◠ )]

Pat just dropped an official explanation for his random 3-5am enjoy prison tweets:

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"write for able bit".

Getting shitty sleep is really common for people who do nothing all day.
If you sit around all day in a stupor you don't get properly tired at bedtime, so you can't get to sleep, but then since you can't sleep you are tired the next day and since you have nothing going on in your life, there's nothing forcing you to do anything so you just sit around all day in a stupor the next day.
I suppose this is one way people transition from being real people to being shut in lardasses, alcoholics or junkies.

He tweeted about this years ago that this sleep pattern was genetic and could be traced back to cave men, and they were the Nightwatchmen who protected the rest of the tribe.

In caveman times, some extra special cavemen grew cheeks the size of Buicks that they used as shields, often using their cheeks to completely block the entrance to their caves against danger.

 

[AnOminous]

"write for able bit".

He's describing alcoholic insomnia and doesn't even understand it.

 

[Maude Snew]

It is astounding that a man that is absolutely unable to say something witty or INTENTIONALLY funny thought he had the potential to be a stand-up comic.

Also he's barely able to stand up on even a good day. Because he's fat.

 

[Sexual Chocolate]

It is astounding that a man that is absolutely unable to say something witty or INTENTIONALLY funny thought he had the potential to be a stand-up comic.

No, child. That's the comedy genius of Pat. If he was self aware enough to know his limitations, he would not squeeze those generous breasts into those tight shirts, or produce so much wholesome milk, stalker.

Rick, the Fat Detective made me

"That is quite obviously a cyberstalker account," typed the fat man with moist undermoobs. "And most likely is run by the person who actually messaged you", he added, pleased with his own sudden flash of porcine intuition.

"Heh. I am smart." thought Rick, as he thoughtfully chewed another carbohydrate snack with his mouth open.

A Thought started to gather above his head. You haven't released a book in 5 years, Rick. 5 long years! Shouldn't you have something to show for all those nights with your breasts sweating over a laptop at Hoolies? Before you typed out "no, child" the millionth time?

Yet, as suddenly as it had arrived, the Thought was gone. Lost forever in a cloud of beer and pepperoni flavored flatulence, it never even crossed his mind.

The world may never get to read the sequels to In The Black, from the amazing mind of Patrick S Tomlinson, author.

In The Red: Failed science fiction novelist Taprick T Pomlinson tries suing the local space police in a desperate Hail Mary bid to rescue his ruined galactic finances. Unknown to him, the warm, fleshy undersides of his bountiful teats have been colonized by tiny green space aliens with an agenda of their own. Erotic hijinx ensue.

In The Pink: Queen Nikki of the Vagulon Nebula desperately needs vast quantities of rare nigtronium gas to protect the fragile ecosystem of her space kingdom. The only man in the sector who can be trusted to watch has just been kidnapped by a criminal cult of mentally ill space stalkers and the space police did nothing because he sued them in the last novel. Erotic hijinx ensue.