Final Fantasy XIV - Kiwi Free Company

In my restless dreams...
I see that glamor...
View attachment 6870896
Everywhere I fucking go.
I hope to one day have the audacity needed to make a pixel outfit this fucking ugly, the headwear of which doesn’t even work on 2 races, and then charge $22USD for it.

I’m a massive casual for this game, mainly an MSQ enjoyer but I love fishing, triad and mahjong, too. The most challenging content I’ll do is an extreme here and there. I haven’t touched the game since a little after the Hydaelyn/Zodiark story ended because I lost interest in the 6.x patches and just figured I’d pick it up in the next expansion when I had the time. Well, I did pick it up over the Christmas/New Year break, and had more time since I was off-work sick, and finally finished Dawntrail (after slogging through the boring, pointless pre-patch Void ”story”).

If you’re going to make me play through an obnoxious, poorly made visual novel, then at least put some fucking gameplay in between the cutscenes. The dungeons and trials were fun… shame I had to sit through hours of utterly boring slop to get to them.

By the time I made it to dead baby eugenics lizard zone, the English voice acting (Wuk Lamat’s grating tranny voice obviously being the worst offender, but the rest of the cast was dogshit too) was so offensive to my ears that I switched to Japanese for the first time ever. I had, up until then, really enjoyed the English voiceover work for this game. Wuk Lamat no longer made my ears bleed once the switch to Japanese was made, but this did little to ameliorate the writing issues.

I’m actually genuinely impressed at how bad it was. I can’t think of a single plot point or character I enjoyed, or even gave a passing fuck about. I’ve seen people say that it felt like it was written for children, which I think is offensive to children. Some of the best stories written for children are just as enjoyable for adults because they have important lessons, coherent plots and well-rounded characters. Actually, to call this slop would be insulting to slop, because at least slop is mindless entertainment. This was not entertainment. It was purgatory. And why was this MSQ so bloated? It had nothing to say. All the characters sounded identical to each other. “Oh, geez, Wuk Lamat, what a great idea! You’re such a leader! You can do it!” Why are the Scions even here? I wish they’d all died in Endwalker. Spiritually I suppose they did, and these are their soulless husks being paraded around to cheer on Wuk Lamat.

”Smile”. The vocalist sounds like a drowning cat. She’s so pitchy and objectively awful. I’m baffled by this choice. I don’t even think the song itself is that terrible (the scenes it was used in were unintentionally hilarious and tone deaf, though) but, christ, that singer. Absolutely bizarre, especially because I otherwise enjoyed the music, and the leitmotifs from ”Smile” were perfectly decent throughout the rest of the score (I particularly really liked Zoraal Ja’s boss fight music and how it used it).

What a disappointing experience.
 
What a disappointing experience.
Join us in our circle of Mald.
You have been initiated. Baptized in the waters of disappointment. We welcome you, brother. Come, let your hate flow through you. Let it empower you. Let it be your guidance to the Promised Land.

Yeah, it was quite shit, wasn't it?
:suffering:
 
Stepping off the boat and hearing the swing jazz music was the moment I really started to get worried this expac.
That song is still so damn jarring to me, it's almost funny.

Because it's so egregiously, unavoidably meant to be evocative of african-american culture... but the actual intended analogues are south- or latin-american. like, i could absolutely see a city in FFXIV having that soundtrack, but it should look like New Orleans, not like Zul'gurub.

It feels like someone realised a bit too late that if they were doing the north half being based on modern and modernised USA, and the south half based on mexico and rio and so on, that there wasn't actually a good place to put the roaring 20s and jazz moves. The smart move would have been to either accept that and move that culture to a shard, or do the new world in two expacs - focus this entire expac on the south part being south america and consistently hinting towards the north part being north america for a future expac. Instead they just randomly squeeze things that come from a completely different era and culture on top of the latin-american analogue (because it would have been, somehow, even MORE egregiously obvious if you actually put it in solution 9) and hope nobody notices.

This is also why Smile just doesn't fit. Again, it's from a culture that otherwise doesn't fit in tuliyollal, and it doesn't fit in alexandria either. every time it plays, it feels out of place because none of the other parts of the expac actually support it's presence.

This is probably no small part of why the culture's so shallow; what should be three cultures at least, probably four, is getting squished into two, and so you have to expend more resources trying to justify that these places are even possible when you should be making them feel lived-in. You could very, very easily have Rio - Mexico - Roaring 20s - Modern World as four entirely different and seperate cities, and instead you just shoved three of those concepts into one city.
 
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People already forgetting the formerly China exclusive "Chun-Li dress" that was low-res as fuck.

Also, speakin' of DT again, the writing team better sideline Wuk Lamat harder than Lyse (who I am re-evaluating a lot since Yda was my favourite Scion in ARR, overshadowed by Alisaie right after) starting with 7.3 at the minimum.
 
Okay so after pushing myself to play the MSQ(been doing Bozja SAM weapon and leveling AST) i reached and completed the Vanguard dungeon. Whoever designed the boss with the AoE's can go step on a lego. Ngl i the whole design of whatever the invaders that are sucking people's spheres. The only real tragedy in this story is that my nigga Gulool Ja Ja is dead
 
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This is probably no small part of why the culture's so shallow; what should be three cultures at least, probably four, is getting squished into two, and so you have to expend more resources trying to justify that these places are even possible when you should be making them feel lived-in. You could very, very easily have Rio - Mexico - Roaring 20s - Modern World as four entirely different and seperate cities, and instead you just shoved three of those concepts into one city.
You have to wonder why they needed to rush like this.

Is it incompetence? Did they bleed every JP autist they had in the 2010s to write a new worldbuilding bible for Tural?
 
Instead we got this fucking lobotomized thing, replete with rubber bullets and whatever else.
I don't think people realise how badly that one decision is. It basically turns half of Shaaloani into a bunch of cosplayers. For all I know, they could literally just be putting on voices and shit.

Also, it makes it super inconsistent when they have a small filler where you go after a corrupt deputy who is responsible for kidnapping and seemed ready to kill the one guy before you save him. But for some reason, he still uses the in-universe equivalent of nerf guns during the shootout.

It made the area worse and makes it so logically inconsistent.


For an expansion that's supposed to be a "new start" there certainly isn't anything interesting or happening in the new zone.
Retards use the excuse that "it's a new story you can't expect Endwalker levels when they haven't had time to set anything up".

Somehow that means it's a good idea to start a new major arc on the weakest foot possible.

This expansion might actually become known as the "1.0 of the new major overarching story". Can't really crash the moon again though. Maybe they'll instead have 8.0 travel far away again so they can get far away from Tural.
 
I don't think people realise how badly that one decision is. It basically turns half of Shaaloani into a bunch of cosplayers. For all I know, they could literally just be putting on voices and shit.

Also, it makes it super inconsistent when they have a small filler where you go after a corrupt deputy who is responsible for kidnapping and seemed ready to kill the one guy before you save him. But for some reason, he still uses the in-universe equivalent of nerf guns during the shootout.

It made the area worse and makes it so logically inconsistent.



Retards use the excuse that "it's a new story you can't expect Endwalker levels when they haven't had time to set anything up".

Somehow that means it's a good idea to start a new major arc on the weakest foot possible.

This expansion might actually become known as the "1.0 of the new major overarching story". Can't really crash the moon again though. Maybe they'll instead have 8.0 travel far away again so they can get far away from Tural.
Just skip the story fags :smug:
 
Retards use the excuse that "it's a new story you can't expect Endwalker levels when they haven't had time to set anything up".
I hate when people use that excuse. Especially when we don't have to create an endwalker level threat when the ~*FINAL DAYS*~ occurred like a week ago. Instead of confining it to the city blocks that were Thavnair and Garlemald, let it affect Tural and have us help deal with the aftermath. All those different cultures? Fucking scared shitless and divided because people were turning into Chinese new year parade dragons and eating people last Monday. Sounds like a good opportunity for a young catfaced leader still unfortunately voiced by a tranny to step up and prove herself.
 
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I don't think people realise how badly that one decision is. It basically turns half of Shaaloani into a bunch of cosplayers. For all I know, they could literally just be putting on voices and shit.

I really don't understand what the rationale was for it.

Like, if they wanted to do a 'peaceful solution' type thing the best way of doing it would've been something along the lines of a trial or an investigation or something rather than a 'duel at high noon' type setup.

All the 'rubber bullets' shit does is turn it into one of those 90s TV shows where you couldn't show guns or use the word 'kill.' All it does is just turn whatever 'problematic tropes' (I fucking hate that word, tropes) into a situation of folks not knowing wtf they're dealing with.
 
I really don't understand what the rationale was for it.

Like, if they wanted to do a 'peaceful solution' type thing the best way of doing it would've been something along the lines of a trial or an investigation or something rather than a 'duel at high noon' type setup.

All the 'rubber bullets' shit does is turn it into one of those 90s TV shows where you couldn't show guns or use the word 'kill.' All it does is just turn whatever 'problematic tropes' (I fucking hate that word, tropes) into a situation of folks not knowing wtf they're dealing with.
It's really funny they did it in a world where Garleans exist and we literally are this close to having machine-gun mounted walkers. Hell, the rest of the Eorzean states were shown to use firearms and cannons (or dragon slayers) without needless moralising. Almost like they understand it's a weapon of war.

Truly, Tural deserved to be colonised by Eorzea for this shit alone. What's the liggers gonna do? Shoot rubber bullets at Lominsan ships armed with a full broadside of cannons?
 
Smile”. The vocalist sounds like a drowning cat. She’s so pitchy and objectively awful. I’m baffled by this choice. I don’t even think the song itself is that terrible (the scenes it was used in were unintentionally hilarious and tone deaf, though) but, christ, that singer.
Wanna know what the worst part about it is? That, iirc, is the vocalist for Scream, and I really enjoyed that song. Scream is closer to what she normally does and leans into her strengths, who the fuck decided to have her sing a DCOM tier song in DT??
 
Wanna know what the worst part about it is? That, iirc, is the vocalist for Scream, and I really enjoyed that song. Scream is closer to what she normally does and leans into her strengths, who the fuck decided to have her sing a DCOM tier song in DT??
I had no idea. I also really enjoyed Scream, and it gave me the best kind of nostalgia for Evanescence’s first album.

I’m actually shocked it’s the same vocalist. Really goes to show how important it is to play to your strengths. You wouldn’t take an endurance runner and make them do high jump instead.
 
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All the 'rubber bullets' shit does is turn it into one of those 90s TV shows where you couldn't show guns or use the word 'kill.' All it does is just turn whatever 'problematic tropes' (I fucking hate that word, tropes) into a situation of folks not knowing wtf they're dealing with.
Apparantly this is because of SBI. I am pulling this claim out of my ass but it makes sense considering what happened to the Minecraft EULA somewhat recently.

Truly, Tural deserved to be colonised by Eorzea for this shit alone. What's the liggers gonna do? Shoot rubber bullets at Lominsan ships armed with a full broadside of cannons?
make the garleans the antagonists again
 
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I'm still on copium that we could one day get a Garlean revival expansion against the remnants of the Empire in southern or eastern Ilsabard. C'mon, Yoshi-P. Corvos 2027.
I hold on to the copium of us getting a Meracydia expansion that isn't written by a retard. But, considering how hard YoshiPee is defending Wuk Lmao I don't have much hope.
 
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