Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

[Tiresome]

I know this is Jack Scalfani and I know he's the opposite of what a chef should be. But does this motherfucker need people to tell him how knife sharpening works?

This motherfucker has been cooking on camera virtually every week for two decades now and reacts like a 5 year old to raw eggs. He gobbles down utterly raw meat. He can't or won't follow the simplest direction. He will never, ever accept criticism. At this point, view him like a machine created in the depths of one of God's more chronic-depressive moments specifically to mock the very concept of the beauty and art of cuisine.

 

[souschef]

This motherfucker has been cooking on camera virtually every week for two decades now and reacts like a 5 year old to raw eggs.

I wonder if he knows how mayo is made. He's disgusted by eggs but stuffs his face with it, he even baked a cake with mayo, for some ungodly reason

 

[Bassomatic]

Titanium cutting boards? Lmao WHAT?!?!?!

I prefer wood myself, also looks classy AF. I loved the snap back "it's not iron".

I'm looking forward to seeing Jack fuck up all these Amish foods but as many said it's a lot most famous the sweets they do.

Also from a PA dutch nigger, get an apple dumpling warm it up (better if fresh but should go with out saying) then pour heavy cream on it. Eat with a spoon.

You're welcome unless you blame me for that extra time in the tread mill then at least admit it was worth it lol.

Another quick add on as said Jack probably will do some pa dutch stuff as people don't know difference and there's overlap. They have added stuff in and willing to cook stuff but we/they are a peasant food base and almost all the foods have a lot of carbs.

Even when you get pre prepared stuff at Amish/dutch markets if you get say general tsos chicken you'll get like double the rice your local Chinese place will hand ya. Were a field toiling people deep down so you can understand why.

I can't wait for Jack to eat plates of egg noodles claiming KEEEETOOOO

 

[densedance]

"How do you like it Tammy?"
It's a lot of flavor. Needs no Sauce.

 

[Falcon Sebben]

Yes, hardwood. Regular, porous wood gets gross and absorb water. I was gifted a glass cutting board, it's terrible. I use it for mise en place only. Cutting stuff on it would hurt the knives not to mention the food sliding around, it's dangerous.

They just require a little TLC and care. Wood cutting boards have been shown to have antimicrobial qualities. I just don't recommend cutting meats or things that are wet on them.

He will when he loop a finger off, which i'm surprised it didn't happen yet

How? He can't hold the food with his gimp hand so Hammy needs to do it.

He just wants it because he is the type that thinks fancy and expensive is always better.

And because titanium is spiffy.

"How do you like it Tammy?"
It's a lot of flavor. Needs no Sauce.

Who the hell is this enamored with fast food? And Taco Bell of all places. Sure it's great when you're drunk but Fatty and Hammy don't have that luxury. They're just disgusting pigs.

 

[p1138]

So more shit he shouldn't be eating, but we know damned well he has been anyway.
"we're literally at our local taco bell" what, as opposed to figuratively being there?
surprisingly isn't angry at the restaurant for being out of their chipotle sauce or whatever the fuck, because he's happy he got nacho cheese sauce as a substitute.
"Taco Bell is pretty afforduhble but ya know, you can get it if you like or not because maybe it's too much money for you but we're ok with this" because fuck you if you think fast food prices have gone up, you're just poor I guess.

12 fucking sauce packets in front of Tammy, presumably to be used? Who the fuck needs TWELVE sauce packets at a fucking taco bell, especially when what you're ordering already comes with a fucking dipping sauce anyway? Oh, wait a minute. It's 5 mild packets and 7 diablo packets and Fatty seems to have forgotten that he's explained MANY times Tammy hates spicy food especially as he adds hot spices to food just so he can eat it all himself.

Starts bitching about how small the size is for $5.49 after he just claimed he was fine with it, decides to cope because he sees GUD MEAT. Then bitches about the dip burrito size and is fine with them after he's assured "there is meat inside"

"Does it feel loaded? it looks kinda skinny. No filler, no beans or rice"

Gets super excited to see Tammy eating that GUD MEAT but then gets disappointed when she says she wants a bite of everything at once, including the french fries.

Meanwhile, Fatty has tried to do something sneaky. He asks people to comment about which sauce they like, and shows the receipt which only has the fries and little burrito things he shows Tammy eating(and I'm assuming a drink or something).

One can only assume he did that to act like he can point to the receipt as proof he didn't gorge himself at Taco Bell, when of course he could have just placed a separate order. And of course Tammy also proceeds to not use the 12 packets of sauce in front of her because she was never going to.

 

[Hollywood Hulk Hogan]

Jack pretending not to gorge himself on fast food is funny. We all know his fat ass ate everything he could

 

[Agamemnon Busmalis]

Who the hell is this enamored with fast food?

A goth bad boy in Casper, Wyoming.

It's pure synchronicity Jack and Cobes both did a video on the same Taco Bell burritos.

Guess this is where the $428 went.

 

[Super Hans v2]

I wonder if he knows how mayo is made. He's disgusted by eggs but stuffs his face with it, he even baked a cake with mayo, for some ungodly reason

You know that he just did the mayo cake as an excuse to eat a spoonful of plain mayo.

 

[Doctor of Autism]

Jack pretending not to gorge himself on fast food is funny. We all know his fat ass ate everything he could

He needs to keep pretending he's on the carnivore diet, when no one believes him.

 

[Tiresome]

Jack: "It's 5.49, let's show how small it is, it's not--"
TamHam, complaining: "It's a snack."

No, that's a normal serving for a normal person, you two fat tubs of shit

 

[Doctor of Autism]

Meanwhile, Fatty has tried to do something sneaky. He asks people to comment about which sauce they like, and shows the receipt which only has the fries and little burrito things he shows Tammy eating(and I'm assuming a drink or something).

The funny thing is that he crops this out on his twitter

 

[densedance]

He needs to keep pretending he's on the carnivore diet, when no one believes him.

He's too much of a narcisstic cunt to ever admit to that. Forget this idea as long as he breathes.

 

[Zeftax]

I really doubt Jack has enough cognitive ability to play some receipt mind games.

 

[Señora Airi]

he even baked a cake with mayo, for some ungodly reason

It makes sense considering the origins of mayo cake was from wartime rations, and mayo is just eggs and oil, so the cake stays moist.

I doubt Jack knew that and just wanted to inject mayo into everything.

 

[Tiresome]

Would it destroy you and end your day to have to just call her Tammy?

No, point well taken. I meant Mrs. Tamara Flanders Scalfani, the fat tub of shit.

 

[Dead Air]

Would it destroy you and end your day to have to just call her Tammy?

Look, if you don't have pics of Tamham and Janette scissoring we'll call her whatever we want. Fag.

 

[Nagato Kai Ni Surigao]

The man, said to be in his 40s, told doctors that he had adopted a "carnivore diet" eight months prior. His diet included between 6 lbs and 9 lbs of cheese, sticks of butter, and daily hamburgers that had additional fat incorporated into them. Since taking on this brow-raising food plan, he claimed his weight dropped, his energy levels increased, and his "mental clarity" improved.

Web
Archive

Saw this and thought it could be our boy, but the hands give it away. If Jack really stuck to his carnivore diet he could be reaping the same health benefits.

Spoiler: Cholesterol lines on hands

 

[Dead Air]

View attachment 6891698



Web
Archive

Saw this and thought it could be our boy, but the hands give it away. If Jack really stuck to his carnivore diet he could be reaping the same health benefits.

Spoiler: Cholesterol lines on hands

View attachment 6891696

Christ almighty. I didn't even know that was possible.

 

[souschef]

It makes sense considering the origins of mayo cake was from wartime rations, and mayo is just eggs and oil, so the cake stays moist.

I doubt Jack knew that and just wanted to inject mayo into everything.

You could go for some wishful thinking that Jack may thought of that but here's the catch: he used Hellmanns. Not saying it's bad quality mayo or anything, but Hellmanns has more than eggs, oil and acid. There's a lot of stuff going home inside a Hellmanns jar, and most of them does not belong in a cake.

I've seen interesting things with mayo, like using as a marinate before baking chicken so you can trigger a reaction breaking down the proteins of the eggs, but you can expect Jack understanding maillard reaction. Jack just used mayo in a cake because he's fat and retarded.