Culture It's Time To Wonder If A Missing Person Alert Should Be Sent Out For The Hawk Tuah Girl, Who Hasn't Released A New Podcast Or Been Seen In Public In 2 - Months After Her Crypto Pump And Dump. Yes, this is a real article.

(L/A)
With Portnoy announcing that he's considering launching a meme coin, I went and did some research on the other crypto coin not named $TRUMP that took the world by storm a few months ago for all the wrong reasons. John Rich did a great blog about it here:

Since that time, we've had barely any updates, besides an obvious PR crisis firm- written tweet by Hailey after it was announced she's getting sued:

And initially I thought that would be the return of Hawk Tuah, mainly because she said she was going to help the investors who lost money. But nope, it's been almost two months and it seems like she's disappeared off the face of the Earth. No new podcast, no new Twitter posts, no Instagram stories, nada. It's an interesting rise-and-fall of someone who was legitimately one of the most famous people on the Internet for a couple months, and one bad crypto actor later, she's completely gone.

The point of this blog is that you should always invest responsibly, and if Dave does end up making a meme coin, luckily he said he'd only do it with someone he trusts a billion percent because otherwise we're fucked:

Good luck out there.
 
We are leaving hawk tuah behind in 2024. We will never speak of it again. We will never speak of Talk Tuah again. We will never speak of Hailey Welch again. We are leaving all of it behind. If you must, must refer to the act of orally applying saliva to the head of a penis, "slob on my knob" will suffice.

The year is 2025.
i speak, and the universe listens
 
I actually kind of respect her now, she grifted hard, made her money, And fucked off like Tom from Myspace. That's how you are supposed to do it.
She was so cringe I'd have paid my own money (about three fiddy of it anyway) to make her fuck off and disappear from the internet forever, but she managed to trick her own fans into doing it for me! Incredible! The best end to this saga, I hope the rugpulled are sneeding and she is living her best life Hawk Tuaing well away from the public eye.
 
But we’re talking about her right now, in 2025. 🤔
counter point:

lalalala.jpg
 
You still are, but that faggot Timberlake broke the site.
MySpace was fucked before Timberlake bought it. Before him it was News Corp ran by Rupert Murdoch, and I swear I remember former Disney CEO Michael Eisner having something to do with it changing in like 2006 or so. They made it so you couldn't HTML embed and make your page YOUR page. Gone were the days of embedding youtube videos directly to your page, or flash games, or changing your fonts, cursors, backgrounds, etc.
I think the last social media site that let you actually have as close a level of creative control over your own page was actually Vampire Freaks, though it wasn't as extensive as MySpace.
 
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I still can't believe she became a successful (?) media personality all from one random retarded thing she said in an interview on the street.
Odds are it was all a self-promotion campaign using bots to get her to go viral to become popular. I think she comes from a rich family. Never hear about the dude who was interviewing her or her friend who was with her. Then again it’s not like I am a hawk tuahthusiast so maybe I’m just being cynical.

Edit: turns out her family is a trash fire with a crack addict absent mom, the interviewer is malding because he isn’t getting much reward for ‘finding’ her, and her friend just kinda rode along with it and is now just posting about snow and not mentioning her friend.
 
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Edit: turns out her family is a trash fire with a crack addict absent mom, the interviewer is malding because he isn’t getting much reward for ‘finding’ her, and her friend just kinda rode along with it and is now just posting about snow and not mentioning her friend.
So she's well adjusted.

Making money off gullible men then vanishing unto the horizon is a skill as old as time. That's what you deserve for worshipping a woman who's claim to fame is spitting like a camel.
 
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