DarksydePhil / TheyCallMeDSP / Phil Burnell: General Discussion #2

[Martys_not_smarty]

I bet should IronChef finally run dry Phil's luck will bring him another whale he can milk for dent bucks

I'd like to take a moment to ask a hypothetical in the vein of our favorite punchable polack faggot when he says what would a psychiatrist would say about their viewing habits and it's thus: take incel cuck sakai and stick his obese unfuckable incel ass in a room with a table and on that table in 20's is all the money xe's donated and some examples of all the shit xe could have bought with it (me it would be how much pussy, booze and drugs but everyone has their vice)and ask was it worth giving some nobody on the internet the equivalent of several payments on a new car just cause?

 

[Cyber Bowling]

I'd like to take a moment to ask a hypothetical in the vein of our favorite punchable polack faggot when he says what would a psychiatrist would say about their viewing habits and it's thus: take incel cuck sakai and stick his obese unfuckable incel ass in a room with a table and on that table in 20's is all the money xe's donated and some examples of all the shit xe could have bought with it (me it would be how much pussy, booze and drugs but everyone has their vice)and ask was it worth giving some nobody on the internet the equivalent of several payments on a new car just cause?

This is obvious armchair speculation, but I think he'll ultimately end up regretting what he spent, even if he never openly admits it. But...we're talking like, 5-10 years down the line when he inevitably moves on from Phil, either by choice or more likely, by somehow being rejected by Phil. I know it seems impossible given how long he's been around (assuming our speculation is correct) but we've seen it happen with other diehard pig loyalists who were in the goutsphere far longer than three letter abbreviation. There was definitely a time where the idea of Phil's former three letter abbreviation, BSV, ever leaving Phil was seen as impossible, but now, he's barely more than a footnote in DSP's history.

Anyway, I suspect whenever the split happens, Sakai will move onto something else and, even if it's like, camgirls or whatever, I bet he'll still be happier because he's getting *something* back from it, even if it's just fake kindness and gratitude, which Phil can't even muster up. Even then, this might be more of a "what could have been" with time as opposed to the spent money specifically, but I feel like they're kinda linked. But in the end, instead of growing, I think they'll just move onto some other parasocial interaction. It's basically like how Phil went from one gacha game to playing Champions.

 

[Terminal Coda]

I suspect whenever the split happens, Sakai will move onto something else and, even if it's like, camgirls or whatever, I bet he'll still be happier because he's getting *something* back from it, even if it's just fake kindness and gratitude, which Phil can't even muster up. Even then, this might be more of a "what could have been" with time as opposed to the spent money specifically, but I feel like they're kinda linked. But in the end, instead of growing, I think they'll just move onto some other parasocial interaction. It's basically like how Phil went from one gacha game to playing Champions.

Sakai seems at least more lucid than some of the previous long term dents. I really didn't think he was gonna crawl back after Phil banned him on kick but I guess I was giving him too much credit.
I am noticing that Phil is getting agitated at his dents quicker lately and snapping at them when he misreads their message or they suggest something that doesn't work. He's always done that but it feels like it's his default 99% of the time now.
My hope is that Sakai will accidentally poke the bear again and defend himself again leading to another ban. If Phil manages to scare off his primary whale I think we'd really see him buckle severely.
He's currently coping about his resurgence, coping about Andy and PPP (that's what I call him) still liking him, coping about the games, the politics shows, the kick viewership, the amount of supporters, etc
I honestly don't think he would be able to handle it if the money started drying up too. He's already trying to sell himself a dozen major lies about his position in the world right now and if it hit him where he feels it most I imagine he'd go nuclear.

 

[Grob420]

I know some people speculate that phil has a credit card again or is using kats credit, but has anyone thought that maybe his parents gave him a credit card in their name? I wouldn't put it past Linda 2 packs a day burnell to give her special baby boy a credit card to help him out since they give him like a grand on Christmas and who knows how much for his birthday.

 

[BPD Gunt Rider]

I know some people speculate that phil has a credit card again or is using kats credit, but has anyone thought that maybe his parents gave him a credit card in their name? I wouldn't put it past Linda 2 packs a day burnell to give her special baby boy a credit card to help him out since they give him like a grand on Christmas and who knows how much for his birthday.

It's easy enough for people recently off bankruptcy to get predatory credit cards and use Affirm.

 

[EmpGulcasa]

It's easy enough for people recently off bankruptcy to get predatory credit cards and use Affirm.

I worked on the backend for Klarna for a couple years and let me tell you, they love people like DSP.

 

[dent_whisperer]

I know some people speculate that phil has a credit card again or is using kats credit, but has anyone thought that maybe his parents gave him a credit card in their name? I wouldn't put it past Linda 2 packs a day burnell to give her special baby boy a credit card to help him out since they give him like a grand on Christmas and who knows how much for his birthday.

Not happening. Dave Burnell won't let it happen because it will absolutely fuck them financially. If they are retired they are on a fixed income with social security so they wouldn't be able to cover his "bills" and their own expenses at the same time.

 

[Big Brown Schlub]

Phil did that "interview" with Keem last year during the Queen arc where they sucked each other off (plz rate this as Islamic). I think the door is open and it's only a matter of time.

I think it's crazy that he turned down an easy minimum $50k payday to become a bearded gnome's personal jester only for him to go and become the dancing monkey of a fat Canadian lesbian (that's what I call him, fat Canadian lesbian) for way less money a year later.

 

[Cyber Bowling]

Sakai seems at least more lucid than some of the previous long term dents. I really didn't think he was gonna crawl back after Phil banned him on kick but I guess I was giving him too much credit.
I am noticing that Phil is getting agitated at his dents quicker lately and snapping at them when he misreads their message or they suggest something that doesn't work. He's always done that but it feels like it's his default 99% of the time now.
My hope is that Sakai will accidentally poke the bear again and defend himself again leading to another ban. If Phil manages to scare off his primary whale I think we'd really see him buckle severely.

Unfortunately, I don't think just being banned will do it. I think he'd just crawl back on Discord or emails or whatever and beg for forgiveness via increased tribute. With most dents, just getting humiliated by Phil isn't enough for them to snap, it's usually Phil specifically insulting one of the few things they value more than his "friendship" like a franchise/character/show they're particularly nostalgic for. Or Phil insulting a specific illness/condition they have, but I think Phil is a little more careful about this. More for TOS sake as opposed to caring about his dents.

I think he'd have to have someone else he's watching/some other money sink lined up after being banned to shift his attention to. Which fortunately for Phil, seems unlikely, but it's not impossible. All it could take is clicking on one stream when Phil isn't online to potentially make him realize how bad Phil's stream is in comparison/how grateful the other streamer is. Or actually trying to do one of the things they LARP about, like really going to the gym or getting a dog or something and realizing that social interaction is possible without having to throw all your money at an ungrateful streamer who won't even pretend to be your friend.

I used to joke that if one of Phil's dents just went to their local gaming store for a warhammer/magic night they'd probably dump Phil entirely and start pouring all that money into their new hobby and not only have a lot of fun, but have a good chance of rising up and becoming king nerd. Specially if they still have that "I have to buy friendship" mentality at the store.

 

[Balr0g]

I know some people speculate that phil has a credit card again or is using kats credit, but has anyone thought that maybe his parents gave him a credit card in their name? I wouldn't put it past Linda 2 packs a day burnell to give her special baby boy a credit card to help him out since they give him like a grand on Christmas and who knows how much for his birthday.

Three words: Amazon Payment plan

Remeber how his eyes lit up when he discovered Amazon had payment plans for his new TV? Whose to say most of his purchases are not also done on payment plans?

 

[SamuraiHitler]

Not happening. Dave Burnell won't let it happen because it will absolutely fuck them financially. If they are retired they are on a fixed income with social security so they wouldn't be able to cover his "bills" and their own expenses at the same time.

I could see Dave sending Phil another picture of him fishing instead. The stolen tire arc was a very special moment in DSP's life, he learned his Dad became a detractor. I still bust a gut every now and then at how confused and angry Phil got over that.

 

[The Penultimate Warrior]

Ninja Gaiden 2 Black stealth dropped today and I really, really hope Phil plays it. It's been far too long since he got his ass reamed by a proper action game. I'm sure he'll make a dumb excuse to duck it, though.
Edit: I played the first stage and the damage you take seems nerfed a bit like it was in Sigma 2, and there are added save points. But the enemies are just as aggressive. I don't think Phil has ever played a 3d Ninja Gaiden game so he will be like a babe in the woods. This is one series where Phil's preferred tactic of facetanking everything absolutely will not work.

I want him to play it so he has to suffer through looking at Ayane and Rachel

 

[LilypaCastsUpper]

I could see Dave sending Phil another picture of him fishing instead. The stolen tire arc was a very special moment in DSP's life, he learned his Dad became a detractor. I still bust a gut every now and then at how confused and angry Phil got over that.

That pretty much confirmed to me that DSP is a sociopath. He was completely confounded as to why his father would send him that, when it is obviously that fishing was probably the one experience they shared and bonded over in life. This is a concept a normal 5 year old would be able to conceptualize.

 

[Dr Pavel I'm CIA]

I honestly don't think he would be able to handle it if the money started drying up too

The thing is that with pigroach luck, Phil always had a whale. Even if he's at only 1-2 whales currently, they somehow have enough money to support him like if it was 5 whales.

He's the only streamer I know of that is supported 90% by whales and it's mind boggling how theses whales ended up in that weird findom relationship with Philliam.

At this point I doubt the money will ever dry up

 

[Do Not Touch Me Pls]

One question with DSP's Street Fighter 6 arc.

What is his win-loss ratio there actually? Does he like, unironically lost 90% of his matches there?

 

[Tom Went To The Mayor]

Ninja Gaiden 2 Black stealth dropped today and I really, really hope Phil plays it. It's been far too long since he got his ass reamed by a proper action game. I'm sure he'll make a dumb excuse to duck it, though.
Edit: I played the first stage and the damage you take seems nerfed a bit like it was in Sigma 2, and there are added save points. But the enemies are just as aggressive. I don't think Phil has ever played a 3d Ninja Gaiden game so he will be like a babe in the woods. This is one series where Phil's preferred tactic of facetanking everything absolutely will not work.

I don't think he'll touch it since he avoids games that are harder than Soulsborne titles, but who knows? He tends to flip-flop like a politician on games he says he won't be playing, like with Balder's Gate III, Stellar Blade, and Warhammer 40K: Space Marine 2, so someone might tell him about it Ninja Gaiden 2: Black, brush the game off saying "nobody cares about Ninja Gaiden anymore" or something like that, then play it months later after meeting some arbitrary goal he set up.

 

[Balr0g]

One question with DSP's Street Fighter 6 arc.

What is his win-loss ratio there actually? Does he like, unironically lost 90% of his matches there?

Not from what I can see. We of course only get the highlights filled with tard rage but I believe he has a win rate of over 50% (total). Now some characters though might be bleow the 50% but for that you would need to check his profile

 

[TheGreatWhiteNorth]

Oh look, it's this again. Phil, maybe instead of talking to yourself (aka no one), you should go the fuck to bed?

 

[Johnny Doxville]

One question with DSP's Street Fighter 6 arc.

What is his win-loss ratio there actually? Does he like, unironically lost 90% of his matches there?

Can't quote exact figures but I think dirge gaming has them displayed at the end of their videos. Overall Phils win rate is something in the mid to high 40s though Cammy and Ken are pretty much hard counters to him as he loses to them much more than others on the roster.

This is why he hides in casual, he cannot hang at low level MR in masters as he loses more than he wins overall

 

[Brother Wind]

Not from what I can see. We of course only get the highlights filled with tard rage but I believe he has a win rate of over 50% (total). Now some characters though might be bleow the 50% but for that you would need to check his profile

Its gotta be pretty close to that. He just goes hot and cold a lot. For a multitude of reasons. Which might seem like a decent batting average. But most people when they run cold eventually declare they have literally anything else to do.

Phil on the other has literally nothing. So he takes the abuse and waste of time.