Careercow Brandon "Bam" Margera - From Jackass to Lolcow

Congratulations to the Philadelphia Eagles for winning the Superbowl and preventing an obnoxious Kansas City Threepeat.

Finger crossed Bam stays sober unlike 99% of the Eagles fanbase. This video proves he doesn't need drugs to be amusing!
 
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If DDP is helping Bam personally, there might be a chance for the earth rocker.
Wrangling an addict skateboarder and wrangling an addict wrestler probably isn’t that different.
Diamond Dallas Page also went to personally help boogie2988 and that turned out to have no chance of sticking or even working from the start

Boogie only mentioned it whenever he wanted to rattle off a list of things that make him look good without actually putting effort into said things
 
Diamond Dallas Page has legitimately helped so many wrestlers get their bodies and minds back together, off the top of my head he basically saved Jake the Snake’s life by helping him kick crack and everything else Jake had been abusing and failed to quit since the 80’s.
He helped Butterbean the boxer lose hundreds of pounds when Butterbean was so despondent that he was heavily considering suicide instead of being trapped in that fat body anymore.
His DDP yoga program helps thousands of people who do and have followed it, recently DDP yoga helped Mick Foley lose over 100 pounds.

Diamond Dallas Page isn’t going to go down in history as one of the wrestling greats, but he will be remembered as one of the greatest people that ever was a wrestler.
If DDP is helping Bam personally, there might be a chance for the earth rocker.
Wrangling an addict skateboarder and wrangling an addict wrestler probably isn’t that different.
He could be potentially be a really good bet for him, but Bam is such a fucking retard that he'll never admit he needs help. He somehow saved Jake Roberts who arguably was the biggest fuck up in wrestling. Got Scott Hall clean for awhile but relapsed years later.

Even if he did help Bam and it stuck, Bam will still have his skinny fat body and alky fat head.
 
But it comes with a 1/100 chance to meet a middle aged alcoholic loser that was a b list celebrity 20 years ago who is too much of a pussy to hold himself accountable for his actions so he blames his friends and loved ones for his shitty life and lack of money and has used the death of his best friend as an excuse to be shit faced 24/7 for over a decade! Surely that alone is worth the $700 price tag?
Lmao imagine only buying 1. Those are going to be collectors items one day worth thousands. Buying more not only gives you a better return on investment, it also increases your chances of meeting Bam(airfare and lodging may or may not be included)
 
Bam and Jackass probably had something to do with that resurgence of skateboarding for that brief period of time.
It definitely helped push skateboarding further into the mainstream than it already was, but the Jackass and Viva La Bam era was mostly at the tail end of the whole big-label skateboarding scene from back in the day.

But, the real true genesis of that scene traces back to when they first started coming out with the double-lipped popsicle boards in the late 80s. Boards before then were shaped like mini surfboards and if you were lucky maybe the back would be lipped. But tricks were more just ramp tricks and pool tricks and faggy old 70s skateboarding tricks like dips and handstands because that's all you could do. But then the symmetrical popsicle boards hit the scene and it led to the invention of street skating which then blew the fuck up. And then of course THPS was just at the right fucking place, right fucking time, but there were tons of extreme sports videogames that were already out. Any of my old niggas remember 2Xtreme? Extreme sports were already trendy by that point, the first X Games was in 1995. And then the labels came around and started gatekeeping the fuck out of pro skateboarding and basically made it pay-to-skate.

Skateboarding is atomized again now and Youtube definitely catalyzed that. Thank god. Back then, everybody wanted to "ride for a label" like that was the dream, that's how you got on the videos and quit middle school to party and do drugs and get fuckin' laid because they had the fucking money and production budgets and distribution channels. So HELL YEAH take your dad's jank-ass VHS camera and go to the grocery store loading dock parking lot by the dumpsters and record some stupid dumb shit and mail it to Big Brother, and promptly get your teenage dreams and ambitions crushed into dust because lol nigga you ain't no rich kid with rich parents from Huntington Beach. After that, go ahead and treat yourself to babby's first existential crisis.

But now in 2025 like, fuck, you can shoot a skate video and post it yourself and a million fucking people will watch it if you're actually good, without any gay gatekeeping, so what the fuck are labels even for now? These zoomies will never live in a world like when I was in high school and dickheads were trying to rob each other of their $65 DC t-shirt or their $200 DVS shoes because label shit was that important.

So good fucking riddance to the big-label scene of skateboarding. May it rust in piss. Just like Bam ... Bam is from that era when rich kids could just buy their way into pro skateboarding. Not possible now when some turd worlder can shred on a skateboard made of old car parts and cow shit while barefoot, post it to youtube, and steeze all over actual pros riding for labels in front of an entire internet audience. If Bam had his same skateboarding skills but was born 20 years later than he was, he'd be a literally-who.

Thank you for coming to my irrelevant Ted talk. And I agree that there is definitely a hard cutoff age in which you physically can't skateboard anymore if you're a weekend amateur and not pro or ex-pro. I gave it up in my early 30s because I realized I can't afford to continue hitting my body on concrete and making myself permanently crippled and retarded when I still have to hold down a job everyday that pays enough money to finance my whole fucking lifestyle.
 
Thank you for coming to my irrelevant Ted talk. And I agree that there is definitely a hard cutoff age in which you physically can't skateboard anymore if you're a weekend amateur and not pro or ex-pro. I gave it up in my early 30s because I realized I can't afford to continue hitting my body on concrete and making myself permanently crippled and retarded when I still have to hold down a job everyday that pays enough money to finance my whole fucking lifestyle.
Not only that, but anyone you’re going to be skateboarding with will be at least 15-25 years younger than you, try hanging at a skatepark without a cop giving you a second glance
 
Not only that, but anyone you’re going to be skateboarding with will be at least 15-25 years younger than you, try hanging at a skatepark without a cop giving you a second glance
That's why you build a backyard ramp.


This is happiest I've seen Bam in over a decade now. I hope he keeps it up. More people need to just take a short stint in jail. Seems to be better than rehabs.
 
Not only that, but anyone you’re going to be skateboarding with will be at least 15-25 years younger than you, try hanging at a skatepark without a cop giving you a second glance
Skating whilst old isn't a problem. You don't need to break yourself off to bomb some hills/fuck with slappies/skate mellow ledges manuals etc. And fuck the skatepark anyway. More of a solo thing anyway at this age.
 
That's why you build a backyard ramp.
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I don't know much about skateboarding, but that looks suspiciously good for someone his age and drug habits. Is he on speed and a pack of painkillers?

In other news, the comments on this video of Dahlia's arrest are some deep boomer conspiracy theory crazyness...
Did you know that Lima sex trafficed Dahlia through her VR goggles? Or that Lima is actually... Dia? They're just split personalities of the same person. Obviously.

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I guess the odds of DDP failing are pretty high, the odds of it having an effect on DDP are slim. He failed with Scott Hall, but even that didn't change DDP
I also would argue that Scott Hall's descent back into alcoholism and his subsequent death can't really be put on DDP in any way.

A lot of addicts fell back into destructive coping mechanism due to the stress of isolation from the COVID lockdowns.
 
That's why you build a backyard ramp.
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This is happiest I've seen Bam in over a decade now. I hope he keeps it up. More people need to just take a short stint in jail. Seems to be better than rehabs.
No doubt he'll be sober until he injures something, and the cycle will start again. It's sad and/or embarrassing that his sobriety and mental wellbeing is intrinsically linked to his ability to step on some glued-together pieces of maple wood.
 
The right wing grift is underway?
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This could be glorious.
Imagine him trying to get Kanye to contact him through social media?
The schizoposting would be amazing and the realization that Kanye wouldn't touch him w a 6ft pole would be the cherry on top.

Let Kaye know you got his back Bam :semperfidelis:
 
This could be glorious.
Imagine him trying to get Kanye to contact him through social media?
The schizoposting would be amazing and the realization that Kanye wouldn't touch him w a 6ft pole would be the cherry on top.

Let Kaye know you got his back Bam :semperfidelis:
Only reason I think he wouldn't pivot to right-wing grifting is he would have to do the right-wing podcast circuit to lay out his beliefs and defend them.

I don't think our dear Bamuel is capable of holding his own in a political debate and would get destroyed by anyone with an IQ high enough to not be a Bam fan.
 
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