🐷 Ethan Ralph's Twitter / Tweets - A collection of thoughts, insights and musings from the internet's favorite gunted hobbit

[Dixieland Buckaroo]

Why is his head so weirdly shaped? Did the west Memphis doctor use fiveceps to pull him out of his mom's ass?

The insta filters he uses get confused what to do with a hog head. That's why he ends up with a different shaped head on every pic.

 

[Rage Pig]

All that money he spent by not going to see Xander for Christmas like he promised the judge he would and being late on child support was enough to finally get another hooker!

It's amazing that he thinks having to pay for the company of a woman will make anyone jealous. Pantsoo has moved on, get over it Ralph.

I don't think she's a literal hooker who he booked at some escort service. This is how he announced her:

Voice actress/artist gives off vibes of mental illness/drug use. Piggertits is a shut in who met his last "girlfriend" on a dating app. Where could these two have met? I think in rehab, timing checks out. He may have tried to impress her with his e-celeb stories and pawpaws ring and she sees a gringo with a pocket full of yankee dollars to leech off.

 

[Garth]

Where could these two have met? I think in rehab, timing checks out.

To add to this, hooking up in rehab - rather, in serious clinical rehabilitation - is strictly forbidden for a plethora of good reasons. Perhaps they'll OD together.

 

[Lazy guy]

Why does he look like he's gone out for a 5 bar night out to dinner while wearing a Cintas work polo from the Universal Technical Institute?

Spoiler

View attachment 7015929The hooker will get the UTI experience for sure if gringo has enough pesos to rub together.

It's even worse. He doesn't even have a shirt with a collar, just a t-shirt.

To add to this, hooking up in rehab - rather, in serious clinical rehabilitation - is strictly forbidden for a plethora of good reasons. Perhaps they'll OD together.

People in programs are usually told not to enter into any new relationships for a year after getting sober. But we know Gunt isn't serious about sobriety.

 

[Lidl Drip]

I don't think she's a literal hooker who he booked at some escort service. This is how he announced her:
View attachment 7016067
Voice actress/artist gives off vibes of mental illness/drug use. Piggertits is a shut in who met his last "girlfriend" on a dating app. Where could these two have met? I think in rehab, timing checks out. He may have tried to impress her with his e-celeb stories and pawpaws ring and she sees a gringo with a pocket full of yankee dollars to leech off.

Some hookers have ambitions above having sex with gross old men for money you know, she could easily be an aspiring artist/voice actress but can't pay the bills with that.

 

[Rage Pig]

Some hookers have ambitions above having sex with gross old men for money you know, she could easily be an aspiring artist/voice actress but can't pay the bills with that.

Piggertits has his modus operandi. If he wants to bang a hooker he visits a brothel. This looks more like his Pantsuela arc. Men don't waste money on a fancy restaurant if they just want to have sex with a prostitute.

 

[Sam Losco's Wife]

"Why won't you take your shirt off for sex, señior?"

 

[Elmo]

I don't think she's a literal hooker who he booked at some escort service. This is how he announced her:
View attachment 7016067
Voice actress/artist gives off vibes of mental illness/drug use. Piggertits is a shut in who met his last "girlfriend" on a dating app. Where could these two have met? I think in rehab, timing checks out. He may have tried to impress her with his e-celeb stories and pawpaws ring and she sees a gringo with a pocket full of yankee dollars to leech off.

Voice actress? He's paying some bish to teach him how to speak Spanish? Is that his angle?

 

[Mynameisdark]

Last Thursday Ralph interviewed JessePS from Pod awful, and Jesse opened the discussion by recounting the text messages Ralph sent to him before the show.

One thing was apparently a secret Ralph wanted to share with Jesse only and it was going "turn the sektur upside down". The other thing Jesse did share was Ralph was apparently really horny thinking about digitally penetrating a woman's asshole with his thumb. Jesse quotes Ralph "Even just thinking about it is making me hard. Wait Jesse don't share that with anyone... Actually go ahead I want you to!"

Methinks Ralph has a started a new love quest, and is really eager to get her shit on his thumb.

 

[niggercattle]

What about a bloated BPD Killstream Host with three tits?

I believe the score between those two is currently two to null.

 

[JustStopDude]

Ralph, the Michelin star rating system only goes up to three.

You'll also discover that the restaurants don't have placemats for you to color on while waiting for your slop.

 

[Sam Losco's Wife]

Methinks Ralph has a started a new love quest, and is really eager to get her shit on his thumb.

The most precious substance in the universe is the poo melange. As a matter of fact it should count as breaking sobriety if you want to know the truth about it. He who controls the poo, controls the universe.

 

[Obscura539]

View attachment 7015408

Absolutely love that he has to prove that there’s another human at the table.

I can hear Ralph’s nervous laughter in this photo.

 

[lester]

The insta filters he uses get confused what to do with a hog head. That's why he ends up with a different shaped head on every pic.

His fucking head looks like it was put in a vise.

 

[alan thicke]

I think his weird head shape is a combination of a "slimming filter" and just the fact that he has dogshit genes. His head looks like someone stretched skin over an egg and put a tiny toupee on top.

 

[HackerX]

I think his weird head shape is a combination of a "slimming filter" and just the fact that he has dogshit genes. His head looks like someone stretched skin over an egg and put a tiny toupee on top.

That really is the best way to describe it. I didn't even know hairlines could recede that far. I don't think he could pull off a shaved head either. Even if he were to cope "I'm not balding, I did it because I wanted to", the shape of his head is to irregular. West Memphis's finest genetics.

 

[Sicko Hunter]

What a bitter loser, everything he says and does a failed attempt to make her jealous.

Period reminder that Ralph has stated on more than one occasion his main reason for living and not putting a gun in his mouth is to spite his enemies. Not for his children, not for god, not for his family but solely to spite Amanda and his numerous enemies.

 

[AncientPhosphur]

The other thing Jesse did share was Ralph was apparently really horny thinking about digitally penetrating a woman's asshole with his thumb. Jesse quotes Ralph "Even just thinking about it is making me hard. Wait Jesse don't share that with anyone... Actually go ahead I want you to!"

I can understand why that would excite him because his thumb is bigger than his dick

 

[Seaside Ronin]

The old saying "he's all thumbs" applies to Ralph perfectly.

 

[An automatic clown]

Last Thursday Ralph interviewed JessePS from Pod awful, and Jesse opened the discussion by recounting the text messages Ralph sent to him before the show.

One thing was apparently a secret Ralph wanted to share with Jesse only and it was going "turn the sektur upside down". The other thing Jesse did share was Ralph was apparently really horny thinking about digitally penetrating a woman's asshole with his thumb. Jesse quotes Ralph "Even just thinking about it is making me hard. Wait Jesse don't share that with anyone... Actually go ahead I want you to!"

Methinks Ralph has a started a new love quest, and is really eager to get her shit on his thumb.

Didnt Jesse deliver diapers and corn to Ralph's VA pig pen ? When did they become amicable ?