"Mad at the Internet" - a/k/a My Psychotherapy Sessions

Y'know I can't exactly shit on whales. Im not sure if I was an actual whale but I spent a 100 to 150 bucks on magic the gathering arena at one point. I really really liked that game and I bought some big packages because I really enjoyed it and was playing it a lot.

I still have my physical MTG collection and In the back of my head I still wish I could buy MTG cards and get a poster of some of the really cool land art on my walls. I decided to never give them money or play the game again because wizards of the coast is a dogshit company, they've turned the game into a big bang theory esque pop culture mashup of every autistic franchise they could find and when they did an appropriate franchise to do a pack for they did Lord of the rings and made Aragon Black.

Wizards of the coast just wants to sell doctor who and transformers cards and then whenever they get their hands on an actually important or valuable thing they do their best to make it gay and gross for attention and ESG. I emailed them and told them directly I would never give them money again and I hope they go bankrupt sooner than later.

I will admit that I occasionally have to force myself to not to think about MTG because God I love my autistic card collecting deck building game. I actively wish I could give them money but they are so dog shit that they compel me not to.
 
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Dire Dire Cocks said:
Wether or not the people in charge of Texas will look at anime and see “identifiable children” or not is anyone’s guess.
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It's written weirdly in a specific yet vague way similar to discords thing that allowed for cubfur shit so I'm praying texas hasn't been infiltrated by pedo diaper shitter furries. Mildly joking, god I don't want that to be true.
"identifiable child" is good, but the "to a reasonable person would be indistinguishable from the image of a child" covers shit like gary coleman. Imagine being fucking arrested for gary coleman parody content, god that'd be so fucking funny. :story:

NEVER SPEND 600 DOLLARS ON A FUCKING F2P GAME REDDIT FUCKERS.
LiquidKid said:
I didn’t get to listen to it live, but today was hands down the funniest Reddit segment ever. I don’t play Genshin Impact, but part of me wants to sign up just to see how expensive it would be to get that character, then email the receipts to Null along with a superchat matching whatever the cost ends up being.

But I also don’t wanna go broke on some anime game I’ll never play.
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Why the fuck would you whale on a f2p game like the redditors do constantly? Retarded. Good call on deciding to save your money lmao.
I said this in the thread for the game but my exposure to the game at first was a friend playing and then saying he spent 40 to unlock the small autistic kid that looked kinda like mario and I was like "I bet i can get mario for free" and I fucking did because you literally are guaranteed characters if you just play the game frequently enough to get quests and shit that give you the roll gems. Thing just throws stuff at you for actually playing the game, my main issue is running out of game to play between updates sometimes. the elemental gameplay and stupidly autistic levels of lore in the game covered in shit like books you can find in the overworld and random quests are like crack cocaine to me in terms of gaming stuff, but without any of the downsides. Always love that shit in vidya.

I got furina for 0 too lmao but there's other water guys that are "better". I like the weird challenge of having a character that gradually drains team health with their attacks it's a special kind of fun gimmick to juggle healing with harder hitting attacks.
EDIT: Further context, There's an old guy with a cane who's better and doesn't kill your team also got for 0 dollars.

waffle said:
Is Furina at least a .JPG of an adult woman? I was doing stuff while I listened and missed if we ever found out.
-Edit- Oh, shit. It actually is an adult. In fact, her design is pretty bland, lol. I expected there to at least be something obviously coomer bait about it.
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Not a jpeg game , it's a 3d open world game. literally everything you see about the game online shows it's not one of the jpg roll style of games but people keep doing the faux-boomerism as treating it like that. Makes the criticisms feel more fake and gay which sucks cause actual shit can be criticized with the game but it NEVER comes up. Also wouldn't really call the design "bland" for not being coomery. Genshin isn't a coomer game, despite the degenerate gooners infesting the fanbase. Most playable characters have clothes tied to their element or job. The most outlandish you're gonna get are more recent guys from the country with 6 tribes based loosely on meso/south america and africa, and even those are just all dressed in their general local cultures style of clothing.

God's strongest milkman said:
Y'know I can't exactly shit on whales. Im not sure if I was an actual whale but I spent a 100 to 150 bucks on magic the gathering arena at one point. I really really liked that game and I bought some big packages because I really enjoyed it and was playing it a lot.

I still have my physical MTG collection and In the back of my head I still wish I could buy MTG cards and get a poster of some of the really cool land art on my walls. I decided to never give them money or play the game again because wizards of the coast is a dogshit company, they've turned the game into a big bang theory esque pop culture mashup of every autistic franchise they could find and when they did an appropriate franchise to do a pack for they did Lord of the rings and made Aragon Black.
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The difference is MTG/e card game shit "requires" whaling for comp shit which makes it still terrible but in a different way. genshin impact is an open world f2p game with element based combat as the main gimmick that just has rng character/weapon unlocks tacked on and cycles out characters every month or so. You don't need to whale to play the game, and the "meta" fags for a singleplayer f2p game using that as the excuse to whale are very fucking silly. Fucking hate people whaling on f2p games and then acting shocked and appaled when they wasted 1000s on shit only to never play the fucking thing. I mean they clearly keep the servers running and the game devs funded but that's about it. Kinda wish more f2p games that weren't one specific china anime game inspired by zelda with a cancerous fanbase weren't as whale mechanic focused but it's clear that's never gonna happen.
EDIT: skipped to the genshin segment on an archive, I like how the read of the ranting of the redditors sounds like francis E dec rant readings.
EDITX2: God I need to eat some blue cheese it's been a few years. These streams keep making me think about FOOD AAARGH!
 
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Optavia Sales Rep said:
I'm going to need explicit confirmation that I don't have to shove a liquor bottle up my ass before, during, or after I subscribe.
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The locals chat should be explicitly dedicated to discussing only the benefits of monogamy and sobriety. Let's hope it's not cursed and what took so long was some kind of demonic ritual they could only complete on a full moon.
 
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"locals" is way too close to "lolcows"

also, minnow/dolphin/whale terminology is gay, it should change to nigger/nigger/nigger because that is what you are when you play a game on a phone, whether you are too broke and jobless as a nigger to have any money to spend on it, or if you are such a huge nigger you spend all your stolen money on fucking phone games, nigger
 
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DeutschfagAufAbwegen said:
Nope, this thread has been derailed by 100 post a day landwhales and lard lads, just like every day
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landwhales on blood and soil.png
I love posting landwhales.
 
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Haramburger said:
What's the cadence on characters returning?
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They usually come back every few months but there's some weird ones that come back rarely and others that come back too often like the guy called "childe" did for a bit. Childe is not a child, but he did show up enough in the plot and the banners for a bit that he could be considered a stalker.
There's also characters who barely show up in named banners but can still be rng rolled which makes people whaling for specific characters very angry. The reddit post talking about their fiance spending 600 on "constellations" means they spent 600 to gain mild character buffs that aren't necessary to play the game. They're neat to get when you get a character multiple times but not 600 dollars neat. So it'snot just about getting the character to these guys, it's about throwing money at a game to max out a stat that you can easily play without.
 
@Null - without going into too much detail about the inner workings, how much does KiwiFlare resemble Anubis?
 
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