Nicholas Robert Rekieta / Rekieta "Law" / Actually Criminal / @NickRekieta - Polysubstance enthusiast, "Lawtuber" turned Dabbleverse streamer, swinger, "whitebread ass nigga", snuffs animals for fun, visits 🇯🇲 BBC resorts. Legally a cuckold who lost his license to practice law. Wife's bod worth $50. The normies even know.

[Sneed Force One]

Being (supposedly) the best paid out of three lawyers in your shitty hick county isn't a high bar to reach Nick.

Well, Nick is good at bars, both drinking under them til his eldest is forced to manage his affairs, and also failing to pay them.

 

[Mike Stoklasas Spock Ears]

Nick's on a spree tonight as those pesky kids are over at Grandma's. No little ankle biters to interrupt his public embarrassment of his family.

Nick Rekieta on twitter tonight:

 

[Strix454]

Nick cope-splains his suicide baiting.

And he explains his phony suicide claim to Mersh of all people. Maybe Mersh can teach Nick how to do fake on-stream strokes.

Its nice that he admits tonight that he doesn't have the money to pay for the CLE to get his law license back though.

And he was never one of the highest paid attorneys in the county. He was a nobody legally.

 

[Vibralldo]

He said he was too poor to afford to get his law license back and then made fun of someone else for being poor back to back without any irony or self awareness

We need to get Nick back on the air, this is gold and it's being held back by the fact he's typing it instead of drunkenly slurring it

 

[Stiffy]

Which law school did Nick attend? Because he's Thomas M. Cooley caliber.
The Minnesota State Bar Exam must be a cakewalk compared to California.

 

[Captain Manning]

I can’t find Nick’s full set, just a short clip Balldo’s Gate posted. All I remember was how nervous and unfunny it was.

He threatened to strike anybody that uploaded his full set on Youtube. It might have been uploaded somewhere on the Farms, but I'm not sure. I also remember it being unfunny dogshit.

But wait a minute Nick. You make so much off YouTube but you can't afford your CLEs to rejoin the Minnesota Bar Association? Which one is true!

Reminder that Nick had like... I think... three or so years to get his CLE done. Him saying he couldn't do it because the big nasty government was arresting and charging him is total horseshit. He put it off, and put it off, and then finally the deadline came and went. He's a lazy fag. He probably resents the judicial system actually expecting him to learn new things. Every lawyer has to do it, but he's Nick Rekieta. He thinks he's special.

Oh... His brain is so full of holes he doesn't realize its an AI does he?

Correct.

Say no to drugs.

I hope nobody asks him about the status of his “Rumble deal.” That would be rather awkward.

It's now his "Rumble arrangement." Remember? More word games.

And he explains his phony suicide claim to Mersh of all people. Maybe Mersh can teach Nick how to do fake on-stream strokes.

I don't think Mersh fakes his stokes. I think he's gonna straight up die live on Rumble some day. Maybe Nick too if he keeps up the substance abuse and returns to streaming.

Which law school did Nick attend?

Mitchell-Hamline.

EDIT: Typo.

 

[Folgers Can]

Nick pretends he has any meaningful YouTube revenue when he streams once every three months.

Being (supposedly) the best paid out of three lawyers in your shitty hick county isn't a high bar to reach Nick.

At least he's now getting more specific on the numbers with confirmation that YouTube and Locals pay him no less than $18.75 (0.375 KNU) for each and every hour that he has a pulse, whether awake or asleep, 24/7/365, just for happening to have the subscriber count that he has and view count for old VODs that he has, regardless of whether or not he ever creates new content ever again. He said it so it must be true:


[X] [A]


[L]

Is there any conceivable way that anything even close to that could be true? How do these streaming platforms even stay in business throwing money into a vortex like this, other than as a loss leader to accumulate data for AI development?


ETA: Since this could easily be another of his "I never said that!" Nickisms where he technically meant "a" county attorney and not "the" county attorney paid the $164K above, for comparison his being paid more than a senior assistant county attorney like the one who prosecuted him would still translate to $12.49 (0.2498 KNU) 24/7/365 just for breathing air:


[L]

Or even if he meant he gets paid more than the lowest wet-behind-the-ears rookie ACA, fine, that's still a whopping $11.19 (0.2238 KNU) 24/7/365 to sit on his ass and never stream:


[L]

Is there any way to just beat the platforms' offer with a crowdfunded $20 for every hour he agrees to not inflict any further streaming on anybody? I'd pay that!

 

[Strix454]

Which law school did Nick attend? Because he's Thomas M. Cooley caliber.
The Minnesota State Bar Exam must be a cakewalk compared to California.

He went to Mitchell Hamline School of Law. Its in the bottom 25% of law schools. But he went to a not-good rural state university in minnesota and got an english degree (creative writing). So he was rather fortunate to get admitted to any law school,

Is there any conceivable way that anything even close to that could be true? How do these streaming platforms even stay in business throwing money into a vortex like this, other than as a loss leader to accumulate data for AI development?

No. Its not true. He had a couple good years on youtube and then had a big rumble contract for one year which was not renewed. For a couple years, Rumble was willing to throw money into the vortex to get more overall views to improve the platform. But all that is over now.

Rumble was probably paying him alot of money. But when he didn't deliver the content or the views they wanted, they dumped his lazy ass.

And I would strongly suspect that Nick's current earned income is close to nothing at all.

 

[Vibralldo]

At least he's now getting more specific on the numbers with confirmation that YouTube and Locals pay him no less than $18.75 (0.375 KNU) for each and every hour that he has a pulse, whether awake or asleep, 24/7/365, just for happening to have the subscriber count that he has and view count for old VODs that he has, regardless of whether or not he ever creates new content ever again. He said it so it must be true:

View attachment 7129273
[X]

View attachment 7129274
[L]

Is there any conceivable way that anything even close to that could be true? How do these streaming platforms even stay in business throwing money into a vortex like this, other than as a loss leader to accumulate data for AI development?

At this point I don't know if Nick knows he isn't earning shit streaming anymore and is lying to us or he's in denial and lying to himself

 

[Sneed Force One]

Nick doesn't care about anyone or anything...until you mention his star-crossed lover, forced into seperation by his bleeding heart reluctant duty to his resentful family.



Nick, once again, diverts the topic. It was a story about how he is a faggot liar who wants to conceal the fact he mindlessly leaves drugs around kids. Nick bends this into "Aaron is being an abuser".

If Aaron didn't tell the April side of the story, he would've outright ignored Aaron's stream.


Nooo stalker child, your wrong again! I didn't sell my house to cover for my self-inflicted drug and child abuse charge legal fees! I always wanted to spend away my children's inheritance while failing to pay for my CLEs! I left April live there rent free you know! Ignore the fact she had no outside contact for months, it was merely coincidence, stalker child! Enjoy obesity!

Aaron telling stories about April without her approval: Cringe, Call him a stalker, Ringing the police (again)

Nick telling stories about April without her approval: Based, Hilarious, Not complicit in cuckoldry!

 

[thebigdream]

Nick has no clue what Chad Zumock gets paid for his sets (he opens for Nick Swardson, Sam Tripoli and others), let alone how long they are. But that’s no barrier to lying when you’re a degenerate piece of shit! At this point I think lying is easier for Nick than breathing.

Bragging about his comedy set? Damn, just when you think Nick has reached a new low, he reaches even lower. That set sucked. I'm surprised no one threw their shoes at him. Even his Denny's non-joke is funnier than anything he said there, all that set did was make it really obvious that Nick's comedic impulse consists of old-school racism mixed with a latent desire to be blacked.

He said he was too poor to afford to get his law license back and then made fun of someone else for being poor back to back without any irony or self awareness

We need to get Nick back on the air, this is gold and it's being held back by the fact he's typing it instead of drunkenly slurring it

These references to being poor (in jest or not) are making me think that his parents have tard-wrangled him by reducing his stipend to the bare necessities, probably not out of any real care for him, but just through being sick of throwing money down a drain. Of course this is 100% speculation, but you can always bet that when Nick fixates on something, there's an element of truth to be found somewhere between the lines.

 

[Captain Manning]

He's claiming he is (or was) the highest paid attorney in the county, but there is no way in hell he was from his litigation history. He only had a few dozen cases since getting his law license, and it was all low end shit.

UNLESS he was doing a lot of non-litigation stuff (contracts, etc.) that we don't know about. Most lawyers in the U.S. are not trial lawyers. In which case, maybe. I kinda doubt it though.

It has been known for a long time now there is no way he was able to afford two mortgages based on his (non-steaming) work history.

 

[Strix454]

Nick had a mortgage on his main house.
He stopped paying that mortgage early in 2024 and the lender foreclosed on him.
In order to get out of foreclosure, he sold his other house (the house next door) and used that to pay off his foreclosed-on mortgage on his primary residence.

However he tries to spin it, he had a mortgage on his house that he was unable to pay and had to sell the other house to pay off. He somehow lost an amount of money equal to the value of the mortgage on his home.

Nick has tried to explain this as a big brained chad financial move. He called it "leverage". But getting your house foreclosed on and fixing it with asset sales is more of a "broke guy" financial move.

 

[John Andrews Stan]

He threatened to strike anybody that uploaded his full set on Youtube. It might have been uploaded somewhere on the Farms, but I'm not sure. I also remember it being unfunny dogshit.

What a thin-skinned faggot Nick is. It’s so amazing you never want anyone to see it, faggot? Sounds legit, faggot.

 

[AltisticRight]

but rice pudding (while a dessert) also wants the starch.

Rice pudding is nice, glutinous rice (known as sticky rice) does not want to be washed. It's used in shaomai. Yummy.

I thought it was an old Chinese practice because communist rice had antimony (or some other chemical) in it from soil uptake that immigrants from China continued our of tradition from their grandmothers?

Spoiler: Off-topic

Might as well go on.
No, that's not entirely why. Rice is washed for a couple reasons. Antimony shouldn't be an issue if you're buying from a reputable brand.
1. Starch. For some types of food like sushi and fried rice, you don't want the starch. It makes rice clump together. Even the most expensive rice from some exotic farm in Asia would need washing. That's also where the myth of overnight rice comes from, one can just use a bit less water and dry the rice up, that's what restaurants do. Roger won't be happy but who cares.
2. Culture. In Asia, we buy rice by barrels. It's not unusual for people to buy 10kg at a time. Overtime, the rice becomes dirty. In the west, rice is typically bought in smaller quantities. I personally only buy at most 1kg at a time because I like trying out different types of rice.

In general, washing multiple times is pretty unnecessary. Just rinse it twice and start cooking. Some say it needs to be washed until the water is clear, that's a waste of time and you risk crushing the kernels.

 

[fggt_mcdckface]

Doesn’t matter how much money he pretends to make, he is the biggest faggot in the world.

 

[John Andrews Stan]

And he explains his phony suicide claim to Mersh of all people. Maybe Mersh can teach Nick how to do fake on-stream strokes.

Mersh who is getting regular wellness checks from the cops because he’s pointing a gun at his head on his livestreams and talking about how he’s a loser whose life is worthless (whenever he’s not talking about what a badass he is, just like his pal Ralph). I wish the two of them would talk less and eat bullets more.

 

[Friend of Dorothy Parker]

He's claiming he is (or was) the highest paid attorney in the county, but there is no way in hell he was from his litigation history. He only had a few dozen cases since getting his law license, and it was all low end shit.

UNLESS he was doing a lot of non-litigation stuff (contracts, etc.) that we don't know about. Most lawyers in the U.S. are not trial lawyers. In which case, maybe. I kinda doubt it though.

It has been known for a long time now there is no way he was able to afford two mortgages based on his (non-steaming) work history.

He was just being quippy about that “best 3 in the county” pay thing. And he tried to switch it to taking a shot at his prosecutors, but either way, he was just doing some of that amazing rekieta comedy.

 

[RotPockets]

He threatened to strike anybody that uploaded his full set on Youtube. It might have been uploaded somewhere on the Farms, but I'm not sure. I also remember it being unfunny dogshit

I checked the thread around the time it happened and found nothing but this and a post with (edit: fixed DMCA) on it so I have to assume he DMCA struck all the clips that were uploaded here,

Riley with an interesting defense of Rekieta's decision to try his hand at standup

View attachment 5433545
(Archive)

Riley posts short clip of Nick's set

View attachment 5433554

 

[Red Frida]

But wait a minute Nick. You make so much off YouTube but you can't afford your CLEs to rejoin the Minnesota Bar Association? Which one is true!

Jesus Christ aren't CLEs just 20 hours a year? Block off three workdays for a on-demand class you entitled loser.