Exist0
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Jan 7, 2020
This thing needs a Klingon edit, possibly a sonichu medallion as well.
Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental
- Thread starter Gentlebastard
- Start date
EatBeforeYouEat
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Jul 6, 2022
Jack has a talent for selecting pictures of himself for his profile that makes him look like a turbo retard. Btw this new profile picture reminded me of the time he posted a side profile of himself and appeared more like sped than at anytime besides the moments he chooses to open his mouth and share his thoughts which completely eliminate all doubt.
- Joined
- Mar 14, 2021
- Joined
- Aug 4, 2021
Kevin Smith looks like shit these days
Puggers
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Apr 8, 2024
What did he mean by this..?
It CANT be about stealing someone else's work can it? He's never done that!
It CANT be about stealing someone else's work can it? He's never done that!
I think I finally found the recipe that can kill Jack.
- Joined
- Mar 14, 2021
No that will sustain
- Joined
- Apr 14, 2018
Jack survived much worse than this, but he'd probably soy out over it like the Denali Meat Mountain.
Anyway Jack tweets
Engagement bait where he's soying out over food
Jack reviews another movie
Jack's letterbox review for Snow White
Jack salty Trump didn't arrest people
Jack acts as though Mommywife isn't making recipes for him or eating the food he should be reviewing
Jack gives more wise advice
Jack's thought of the day
Jack wants Elon to throw people in jail
biggacracka
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Dec 14, 2022
JACK WAS 1 GUY 1 JAR?!?!Jack's thought of the day
- Joined
- Sep 29, 2022
I got chest pains just watching that video.
All this shows is how retarded he is as from what I understand it's super-woke.
If Fatty can't see it it's because he's literally brain damaged.
Acceptable
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Feb 12, 2017
He's working with one dead, squinty eye as well. I'm glad tammy is taking him to all the movies they can before he can no longer see and comprehend them. its like taking your decrepit elderly dog for walks in the park in a stroller just so they can see the sun. its good for their soul
Marc
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Nov 10, 2022
Yeah; ruining the moviegoing experience for others is so good for Jack's soul he doesn't have. Some day, Jack's movie reviews will make sense when it's revealed he parks his scooter in the theater facing the wrong direction.
- Joined
- Sep 29, 2022
All he cares about is the popcorn and stuffing his face with whatever snacks he managed to sneak in. Fatty literally couldn't care less about the movie as he's admitted he has trouble seeing the screen. This is why his reviews focus on naughty language, political shit and violence. It's all he can make out.
Marc
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Nov 10, 2022
I have to disagree, there: Jack regularly fails to notice all three when recommending films known to contain them. In fact, he regularly fails at everything; and probably shits on the wall.
On a tenuously related note: Does anyone suspect the fat, bald faggot of recording these "movie reviews" for the same reason he reviews the pre-movie dining he sneaks into the theater? Are Jack and Tammy including their movie tickets and bottomless popcorn tubs in the endless business expenses for their perpetually unprofitable GiveMe Entertainment? At the very least, these enormous fatheads document themselves pre-gaming for buckets of popcorn by deliberately eating a full meal before every movie Jack fails to perceive or recall.
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- Joined
- Sep 29, 2022
But that's only because he's not paying attention and he's too busy whining to Mommy Wife to get him more popcorn.
And while it would be funny if that was the case that he's trying to use this as a business expense he's admitted to having a yearly pass to AMC or something so they go to the movies every week to maximize the cost. Or maybe that's part of the grift. Honestly who knows with this faggot?
- Joined
- Feb 3, 2013
Of course Jack wants his daddies Trump and Elon to arrest people. He doesn't even specify who and why they should be arrested
He didn't see how orange, wrinkled, and weathered AI Trump looks in this pic? I guess of course he didn't, right, bc of his eye sight?
When he was making his recent egg and shrimp soup (aka egg white pasta) he asked Tammy what kind of cheese he was putting in the 'alfredo sauce' while holding the huge jar of shredded cheese, like he genuinely might not have been able to read large print on the label.
I wonder if he does his own grocery shopping & gets it delivered by Amazon Fresh or something, or if he makes Tammy go buy all his supplies for videos in person. Would be nice of him to at least do that himself, but I got the feeling she bought the cheese for the video, and that's why he asked her what kind of cheese it was, too.
Marc
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Nov 10, 2022
You know it's only the tip of that iceberg. Being as the strokes caused him to go from having the temperament of a toddler to having the temperament of a special needs toddler, I laugh imaging how his online obstreperousness plays out in real life.
Just picture Tammy apologizing to her dinner guests from church while she tiredly struggles to figure out why Jack is angry, agitated, grunting non-verbally, and messily flipping his plates of raw meat cubes and cheddar cheese over:
Jack is sat on his dog fart blanket, at his designated end of the Scalfanis' sectional sofa, using his own cauldron of a gut for a table. Tammy and their two guests are sat close together on the other end, with TV trays in front of them. The guests meekly pick at their cold Bojangles chicken while Tammy loudly takes a bite of one item at a time from her fully loaded plate of sides she didn't offer anyone else.
Guest 1: "So...I notice you have two kitchens. Do you cook a lot?."
Tammy: "Jack? JACK! Are you hungry, Jack?." *Jack nods and rapidly blinks with his left eye*
Tammy: "Okay. Jack - Did you make a boom-boom?." *Jack nods and rapidly blinks with his left eye*
Tammy: *exasperated sigh/yawn while massaging her own forehead fat rolls with all ten fingers* "Alright - Uh-Everyone, just keep watching Blue's Clues - Me and Jack-" *loud, percussive fart like a goose with pneumonia flew out of her ass* "Ow! Me and Jack need to take a quick shower." [pronounced "chow-uhr"]
Tammy wheels Jack toward the bathroom, both horrifyingly snail-like in the way they each leave a trail of brown grease that smells like a barn.
Guest 2: "Uh...So how do you know them?"
Guest 1: "I don't!."
Guest 2: "Oh. Uh...They um...they offered to pay me with dinner for appearing in a video she said the husband needed to record for 'God Month.' I think he has Lou Gehrig's disease or something."
Guest 1: "Oh my gosh."
Guest 2: "Yeah. They don't seem to have any frien-."
*Pair of shower heads loudly burst to life in adjacent room, spitting hard water with granules of sand as pipes rattle violently within walls*
Guest 1: *gasp*
Tammy (clearly overheard via unflattering acoustics of shoddy pole barn): "BAD!." *wet, slapping sound* "BAD JACK!. YOUR FINGERS HAVE SHIT ALL OVER THEM - YOU DON'T PUT THOSE IN MY VAGINA UNTIL THEY'RE CLEAN! DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME? CLEAN! JACK? JACK! WHAT'S ALL THIS? OH, JESUS CHRIST - JACK, YOU HAVE OLD SHIT ALL OVER YOUR BALLS."
*wet slap*
Jack: "MMNNOH!."
Tammy: "That's what you get! When I asked earlier if you had an accident, you said 'No.' YOU SAID 'NO', JACK! GIVE ME YOUR HAND!."
Jack: "MMNNOH!."*overheard retching and vomiting what sounds like hard marbles*
Tammy: "IF I HAVE TO SMELL IT, YOU HAVE TO SMELL IT!."
Guest 2, knocking on bathroom door: "HI - MANDY, WE HAVE TO GO! THANK YOU BOTH SO MUCH FOR INVITING US! I HOPE YOUR HUSBAND STARTS FEELING BETTER. GOODBYE!" *pregnant pause after receiving no reply* "GOODBYE!."
Jack: "MMNNOH!."
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- Joined
- Sep 29, 2022
It's always the same with these types. They're not big on specifics just vague concepts.
Marc
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Nov 10, 2022
It's always vague because "just tell me what to hate" types such as Jack generalize according to whatever they believe is antithetical to their own, personal values consisting of little more than vague concepts - Their small-mindedness is such that they don't actually stand for anything less nebulous than platitudinal mantras such as "I gotta look out for number one", even when their proclivities are overtly self-destructive.