DarksydePhil / TheyCallMeDSP / Phil Burnell: General Discussion #2

[arrivefriday]

Stuttering Craig seems to have gone viral, actually viral though, not viral in pigspeak
Now, I don't care about this shit but this seem like the sorta thing DSP would seethe over
sorry if repost or late i watched a video and they mentioned this guy randomly.

 

[Drama Trauma]

Damn, for a sec he really looked terrified:

Phil, I think the game is trying to tell you something.

 

[Brother Wind]

Going to tip DSP $1000 tomorrow so that all of the niggers I am quoting have a big boo boo cry about it and give me lots of attention so I'll definitely never do it again.

You are so incredibly unfunny I don't even want to call you slurs. Like calling you a faggot or a retard is using the culture of the farms, and frankly I feel that gives off the wrong idea. Each of your posts just makes me way less prone to using this site. You genuinely bring things down here in a way that even yelling at you isn't fun. So that makes you sub Marlintan or Anonymouse. And I know this will bring you an inch of joy, and the only crumb of genuine joy you may have in your life is that you have ruffled me so deeply that I feel it necessary to call you out again.

Just fuck off already. Please.

 

[Kotol]

Does anyone know why exactly Phil's Zoi died? At first I thought having negative karma etc was like your Zoi having depression, but it apparently only changes what your Zoi can do to other people or objects in the world. (with enough negative karma you can apparently do crime like hacking or robbing an ATM)

 

[Big Brown Schlub]

Damn, for a sec he really looked terrified:
View attachment 7166754
Phil, I think the game is trying to tell you something.

I hope someone makes a 30-45 minute compilation of The Life of Phil Burnell in Inzoi and how similar it is to the man himself, because that shit was fucking kino.

Gives himself all positive traits, spends way too much time in the character creator, once Virtual Phil's pathetic life starts he has no skills, no friends (these two also never change), no job, career - days worked: 0, spends all his time inside on the computer all day, goes outside twice, refuses to socialize with other virtual men and women, when forced to socialize it goes badly, starts sperging out at inanimate objects, gets a job in finance, struggles to figure out how to go outside and then how to go to work, returns home from the first day of honest work he's ever worked in his life, immediately goes on the PC and then immediately dies because his karma got too low (Virtual Phil seems to be just as much of a piece of shit as the genuine article), reloads earlier save, does nothing different, dies again the same way, Virtual Jasper taunts Virtual Phil for being a piece of shit and forces him to walk Virtual Earth as a spiteful ghost for all eternity.

You can't write this kind of comedy, it just happens

 

[GameratePTSD]

I hope someone makes a 30-45 minute compilation of The Life of Phil Burnell in Inzoi and how similar it is to the man himself, because that shit was fucking kino.

Gives himself all positive traits, spends way too much time in the character creator, once Virtual Phil's pathetic life starts he has no skills, no friends (these two also never change), no job, career - days worked: 0, spends all his time inside on the computer all day, goes outside twice, refuses to socialize with other virtual men and women, when forced to socialize it goes badly, starts sperging out at inanimate objects, gets a job in finance, struggles to figure out how to go outside and then how to go to work, returns home from the first day of honest work he's ever worked in his life, immediately goes on the PC and then immediately dies because his karma got too low (Virtual Phil seems to be just as much of a piece of shit as the genuine article), reloads earlier save, does nothing different, dies again the same way, Virtual Jasper taunts Virtual Phil for being a piece of shit and forces him to walk Virtual Earth as a spiteful ghost for all eternity.

You can't write this kind of comedy, it just happens

This reminds me of that Malcolm in the Middle episode. I HAVE SOCIAL SKILLS, JACKASS.

 

[Very Honest Content]

it would be funny if the programmers put in a fail state where it detects phil is playing it it will only cause misery.

If only they would program in a tell of this intention with a nice coat of yellow paint over the screen when it engaged.

 

[AGoodBrazilian]

He didn’t hit the goal after being really smug about hitting it earlier. A bunch of freeloaders and spectators are watching without paying

But he’s definitely not bitter and resentful about the whale not bailing another time yesterday.

 

[Dr Pavel I'm CIA]

Does anyone know why exactly Phil's Zoi died? At first I thought having negative karma etc was like your Zoi having depression, but it apparently only changes what your Zoi can do to other people or objects in the world. (with enough negative karma you can apparently do crime like hacking or robbing an ATM)

He never bothered with the menus and mostly let the game play itself with the autonomy setting up to the max.

It's safe to assume it has to do with his Zoi needs levels

Just pure learned helplessness, he kept looking at chat to tell him how to play rather than exploring the UI or anything.
And then kept going weirdly zoomed in on the game like it was a third person walk sim.

My guess is he didn't want to play it and was forced by a paypig into it or he didn't manage to wrap his head around how to play a life sim game.

 

[neger psykolog]

But he’s definitely not bitter and resentful about the whale not bailing another time yesterday.

It hits different when DSP is lecturing you from his old khando.

 

[Balr0g]

He didn’t hit the goal after being really smug about hitting it earlier. A bunch of freeloaders and spectators are watching without paying

View attachment 7166845

But he’s definitely not bitter and resentful about the whale not bailing another time yesterday.

View attachment 7166848

But at least the Soykoden streak is kept alive to spite Triple P (you get the drill, right?) Though I expect extra hardcore begging to "lock in" the next reward (reward as in "I reward myself") and most likely the usual dent coming in playing Captain Save-a-pig

 

[PieceofShet]

This game is like his life, fr fr!

 

[Corporal Lewis]

DSP outlives... himself?

 

[Drama Trauma]

Why is Phil in Connecticut? Did he finally sold his condo there or just went to his parents to beg for money (maybe both)?

 

[thirstymcgee]

Why is Phil in Connecticut? Did he finally sold his condo there or just went to his parents to beg for money (maybe both)?

Think man, think.

 

[Free Jasper]

I listen to a lot of restreamers while working and it always causes me to freeze and think when I hear a grown man say “We haven’t decided what we’re doing for my birthday!”.
It always catches my attention because it just sounds so wrong. A middle aged man unironically saying a line you’d really only expect a 9 year old girl to say.

 

[johnkimble123]

It’s funny because the way Phil acts on streams contradicts everything he thinks he is, and will never be able to admit it to himself that everything he does is awful.

No new viewer is going to be like “oh a $ goal, let me help”. That’s not a thing. Not in 2025. No normal person wants to be told to do something especially in terms of giving money. That isn’t a thing that exists unless you’re a stripper.

That’s just the thing though, Phil thinks he’s a stripper, not a 10 obv but like a 5, the girl with the scars of pregnancy and sagging tits, who if he shows up 6 days a week and dances for hours, you’ll see he is really dedicated thus you’ll give him money. He won’t make any effort to be more entertaining, other than a new outfit, will do the same tired dance every day, on 2 shifts, but he’s still the same mid stripper demanding money for bad content. And sometimes, people will just come by and give him a $1 to shut him up until the next time he’s demanding tips. He does have a handful of weirdos who love him or the routine, but everybody knows the support isn’t organic.

And I think we all know this now, but Phil will try to sell himself to anybody until the strip club (YouTube) tells him he can’t. He saw more opportunity to make money at a new club (Kick), and it only took 6 months for that crowd to hate him. They only show up to laugh at the old stripper who hasn’t figured out what he is.

Until every strip club in the world shuts the door on Phil, this is his life. There is no alternative.

 

[UsedUp]

How apt.

 

[Luigi Mangione]

It’s funny because the way Phil acts on streams contradicts everything he thinks he is, and will never be able to admit it to himself that everything he does is awful.

No new viewer is going to be like “oh a $ goal, let me help”. That’s not a thing. Not in 2025. No normal person wants to be told to do something especially in terms of giving money. That isn’t a thing that exists unless you’re a stripper.

That’s just the thing though, Phil thinks he’s a stripper, not a 10 obv but like a 5, the girl with the scars of pregnancy and sagging tits, who if he shows up 6 days a week and dances for hours, you’ll see he is really dedicated thus you’ll give him money. He won’t make any effort to be more entertaining, other than a new outfit, will do the same tired dance every day, on 2 shifts, but he’s still the same mid stripper demanding money for bad content. And sometimes, people will just come by and give him a $1 to shut him up until the next time he’s demanding tips. He does have a handful of weirdos who love him or the routine, but everybody knows the support isn’t organic.

And I think we all know this now, but Phil will try to sell himself to anybody until the strip club (YouTube) tells him he can’t. He saw more opportunity to make money at a new club (Kick), and it only took 6 months for that crowd to hate him. They only show up to laugh at the old stripper who hasn’t figured out what he is.

Until every strip club in the world shuts the door on Phil, this is his life. There is no alternative.

I think my favourite Philism is all the images/fanart he uses in his pre-stream to hype himself up as something he's absolutely not, putting his face over Tyler Durden, Colonel Sanders and the like while ancient musical remixes of his content back when he had passion play in the background. The contrast in how he sees himself vs how everyone else sees him is hysterical to me; I can't imagine even his worst dents thinking the guy is in anyway some symbol of being slick and cool; I've always got the sense a lot of them stay out of pity, thinking that if Phil wins, trolling and negativity takes a hit and Phil represents a struggle through difficulty, which is probably why he attracts a lot of physically and mentally handicapped people. If there is anyone else on the face on the planet who believes Phil's hype for himself, they're more retarded and pathetic than he is, and I would be fascinated to meet the person who believes that other than Phil.

In a weird way, I kind of don't want Phil to fail and disappear though. To quote Silence Of The Lambs, the world is more interesting with him in it. He's a sitcom character brought to life. PPP definitely recognised that, and tried to get him to at least play to his strengths. But Phil will always find a way to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory. There are lolcows a lot more disgusting and obviously flawed than Phil, but he's kind of a disasterpiece. It looks like sadly we're probably going to see a slightly more boring period after the Casino saga as he becomes more insular, but that has potential in of itself.

 

[Shuma-Gorath]

The idea of Phil dying and his ghost wandering for eternity screaming "WHY DID I DIE!?" is just too perfect.

Gives himself all positive traits, spends way too much time in the character creator, once Virtual Phil's pathetic life starts he has no skills, no friends (these two also never change), no job, career

This is almost literally that Malcolm in the Middle episode where Malcolm makes his family into a computer sim and gives himself all the attributes but ends up being a loser while the rest succeed. Phil's life is even more absurd than a sitcom.

This reminds me of that Malcolm in the Middle episode. I HAVE SOCIAL SKILLS, JACKASS.

Oh fuck, I got sniped.
LMAO, "this is idiotic programming!".