Nicholas Robert Rekieta / Rekieta "Law" / Actually Criminal / @NickRekieta - Polysubstance enthusiast, "Lawtuber" turned Dabbleverse streamer, swinger, "whitebread ass nigga", snuffs animals for fun, visits 🇯🇲 BBC resorts. Legally a cuckold who lost his license to practice law. Wife's bod worth $50. The normies even know.

[Chazzed Up]

To me, the funniest thing isn't that Nick's earned income is way down, but rather the fact that he owes the lion's share of his former lifestyle to his parents (and his grandparents before that). He worked really hard to try and keep that a secret. He's still trying to.

Surprised he doesn't just fully embrace it and own it as a flex. 'Bet you incel prudes wish you had a dead grandfather with oil money!'

 

[Vibralldo]

Didn't Nick say he was gonna stream that trial yesterday?

 

[TrainWreckWatcher]

As for the Nick-related news:

No surprise here. He spent months whining and giving this fat pedo money and now the pedo is bored of him and back to wanting to hate on all aspects of Aaron.
Get fucked Nick you have no friends, you gave the weird creepy man money to try and be your friend cause he didn't like people you hated and now that the money is gone he's done with you too.

Nick's parents will never let him move to LA Unless the kids directly benefit from it and Nick doesn't want the kids there for it he just wants to party himself.

 

[John Andrews Stan]

He spent months whining and giving this fat pedo money and now the pedo is bored of him and back to wanting to hate on all aspects of Aaron.

Also consider that Nick knows the children Melton has been making the subjects of his running pedophilia shtick. He’s just such a piece of shit it beggars belief.

 

[Grotesque Bushes]

Didn't Nick say he was gonna stream that trial yesterday?

Missed streams are even better than soonposting. It's like he's a real streamer again!

 

[daffodils]

Didn't Nick say he was gonna stream that trial yesterday?

Emily Baker says the trial probably won't start till the end of the month. Yesterday she was streaming boring pre-trial minutiae to 14k people without ever mentioning cum or cripples. Huge opportunity for Nick to show her how a real Lawtuber does it.

 

[Watching Rekieta]

Nick: "I use these calipers to measure the penis size of all the bulls I employ."

I know this fake because Nick is too inept to use calipers.

Nick measures his bulls using imperially sized Balldos. He uses either his personal collection of Extra Small or Small. If that's not enough range, he'll borrow Aprils bloody Medium sizes if the bulls don't object to the smell.

Finally, if that's not enough, he'll break out Kayla's favourite Jamaican BBC series of Large, Extra Large and the XXL Dual-penetrator model she brought back from Hedonism II. It looks like the Nacelles on the Starship Enterprise w/ NCC-1701XXL printed on the side. Nick hates Worf after their emotional affair with this balldo.

 

[Solomon Bundy]

Yesterday she was streaming boring pre-trial minutiae to 14k people without ever mentioning cum or cripples.

Who is this sorceress? What strange gods fuel these incredible magicks? Do you think there will be others capable of such feats?

 

[AnOminous]

Oh sweet summer child of the financially illiterate. Nick's debit card was declined. What Nick would have to explain to all you rubes is that the declination just shows he is at "max leverage." He cannot leverage even one more dollar. Financial people like Nick are always fully leveraged so that "Tomorrow's Dollar is Working Today(tm)".

He operates on the J. Wellington Wimpy leverage strategy. "I'll gladly pay you Tuesday for a single Dorito today."

Didn't Nick say he was gonna stream that trial yesterday?

I don't know if you've noticed this, but Nick lies. Luckily, for you, there's a way of telling if Nick lied about something. Did he say it? It's a lie.

He’s just such a piece of shit it beggars belief.

It has gone beyond beggaring belief. It now outright buggers belief.

 

[AltisticRight]

Honest to GOD. Totally random ad encountered via YouTube Mobile app just now:

View attachment 7166228

Nick: "I use these calipers to measure the penis size of all the bulls I employ."
Black man: "Mine is about this big."
Nick: "Mmmmmmmm. Nice."

For metrology fags.
>Kayla uses this to measure me

>She'll need something else for mine
> Like this?

>No, not this one
> This?

>

>

 

[Folgers Can]

Per the podcast, Nick claims that he will start covering the Karen Read trial, TOMORROW.

Didn't Nick say he was gonna stream that trial yesterday?

Missed streams are even better than soonposting. It's like he's a real streamer again!

Wait wait wait, did he mean MN time or LA time given where he was then? Oh wait it's too late anyway, so scratch that, maybe he meant Hawaii time with six minutes to go? Or, god forbid, did he mean true Kiwi time with sixty-six minutes to go? Make me wait harder, e-daddy:

 

[AltisticRight]

Guess who else uses paper plates?

 

[Sneed Force One]

I can fully envisage Nick pissing off all the Kanidyohi locals with his faggotry. He's the dickhead loudly huffing and groaning at the coffee shop because some elderly lady is taking time with her order. He's got his precious little future presidents and inventors to pick up from their activities you know!

If he wasn't such a contemptable, angry loser, he'd just be the neighbourhood gossip. But no, everyone from Luverne to Duluth probably knows he's a raging homosexual. No wonder he wants to escape Minnesota with dreams of a blond solvent-huffer in tow.

 

[Rolex]

One of the reasons I hate drug abuse so much is that even if you turn over a new leaf and put your life back together, the damage is already done. If you're extremely lucky, you may still have enough brain cells to factory reset and run like new, but the odds are seriously against you when you do shit like inhalants.

Even to this day, a tiny, tiny part of me wants to see Nick shape up... but it seems pretty obvious that not only is he entirely unrepentant, he's also probably too brain-damaged to add value to trials anymore. I think his legal opinions used to be fairly cogent while being just extreme enough to create fun discussions with the guests he'd have on. Now it seems the only thing his brain can focus on long enough to speak about is his unbelievably brazen and gay obsession with Aaron.
Oh well.

 

[Oliver Onions]

Didn't Nick say he was gonna stream that trial yesterday?

No, stalker prude. These are your delusions.

 

[Vibralldo]

Emily Baker says the trial probably won't start till the end of the month. Yesterday she was streaming boring pre-trial minutiae to 14k people without ever mentioning cum or cripples. Huge opportunity for Nick to show her how a real Lawtuber does it.

I know there was a 0 percent chance he was gonna stream, I just want to remind everyone that Nick did in fact fail to stream yet again

 

[John Andrews Stan]

I know there was a 0 percent chance he was gonna stream, I just want to remind everyone that Nick did in fact fail to stream yet again

The Rekieta motto is “Overpromise, under-deliver, and always be humiliating your children.”

 

[TertiaryObjective]

Even to this day, a tiny, tiny part of me wants to see Nick shape up...

I want to see Nick shape up. While a LOTY threepeat would be amazing, the world does not benefit from having brainrot, degenerate Nick Rekieta in it. His family does not benefit from having swinging, drugged out parents. The world is worse for having Nick Rekieta as a failure in it.

I wish this for most cows, too, but I know the likelihood is nearly zero that this has a good outcome.

 

[John Andrews Stan]

I want to see Nick shape up.

And I want a unicorn. I’m more likely to get my wish than you are.

 

[A Very Big Fish]

One of the reasons I hate drug abuse so much is that even if you turn over a new leaf and put your life back together, the damage is already done. If you're extremely lucky, you may still have enough brain cells to factory reset and run like new, but the odds are seriously against you when you do shit like inhalants.

I forget where I heard it, but I once heard someone say, "God will forgive your sins, but nature won't".

Getting sober is great, but sometimes, the damage is done. Still better to get sober than not, but best of all is to avoid addiction in the first place.