Nintendo Switch (Currently Plagued) - Here we shit post about the new Nintendo console, The Switch

  • 🐕 I am attempting to get the site runnning as fast as possible. If you are experiencing slow page load times, please report it.
>overpriced console with negligible performance increase
>every little feature nickel and dimed even harder than switch 1
>joycons will drift
>several parts like microphone and controller attachments built onto the tablet itself so if something breaks, you have to buy a new console or pay the price of one to fix it
>all of last gen's shitty fucking slop dumped onto the console so it looks like there's games
>basic social features that the fucking XBOX 360 did 20 years ago advertised as new, novel reasons to dump hundreds on this piece of crap AND you pay a fee to use them when you can do all of them for free on PC or your phone
>PAID next gen updates :stress:
>shitty tech demo where you walk around on a 3D model of the console you just dumped hundreds on will not be included for free and will cost money :stress:
>niggertendo has NO FUCKING GAMES except mario kart tour 2, disabled basketball simulator, soulless donkey kong odyssey and metroid prime 4 which will be available on switch 1

you nintentards got raped. hard. I would almost feel sorry for you if you didn't so willingly spread your ass cheeks for niggertendo every single day
 
  • Like
  • Agree
  • Winner
Reactions: Cucurbita King, HIVidaBoheme, Chris Konon and 18 others
rareblacklobster said:
What else is there besides the tracks and characters? Those are all unlockable on GX.
Click to expand...
I'd love to tell you but TCRF is getting DDOSed right now.

edit: Oh, there we go. Literally the entire arcade game is on the home console disc. So you can access literally anything from AX through GX with the appropriate tools. So not just tracks and cars but modes and such.
 
>This is a PvPvE-based multiplayer action game in which up to 8 players battle each other and players battle their enemies. Players become the “Duskbloods,” who have gained powers beyond those of humans through the power of special blood, and find themselves in an epic battle for the “First Blood.

Yeah... I'll pass.
 
  • Horrifying
  • Like
  • Agree
Reactions: GetToTheChoppa, Nameless One, Clarence Big Boss and 5 others
Anonitolia said:
>paid upgrades for Switch games
>paid tech demo for Switch 2
>one (1) new game with any significant marketing and it's fucking Mario Kart but Open World
>camera sold separately
>3FPS voice chat locked behind an NSO subscription (congrats, nobody is going to switch away from Discord now)
>no Melee on Gamecube Online
>indie section was so barebones in terms of actual new titles they had to add literal shovelware into the mix (Survival Kids)
>heavy-hitter indies are also releasing simultaneously everywhere else (Deltarune, Silksong?, NBA WWE slop)
>the single new first-party IP is Rocket League with retarded cripples and the most annoying-looking control scheme yet
>old Joy-cons, SD cards, Pro Controller, Gamecube controller not compatible with the new system
>heavy-hitting first party announcements are niche shit like DONKEY KONG AND AIR RIDE (personally has me glad but your average normie WILL NOT care)
>new Download Play is not confirmed to work with all titles
>same with backwards compatibility
>data transfer tied to a Nintendo Account and not actual, built-in software like with the Wii -> Wii U
>cartridges are identical save for COLOR
>no mention of themes, UI looks as bland and awful as the first Switch but with a more colorful selection outline
THEY WERE SO CLOSE
BUT THEY FUMBLED IT SO BADLY :story:

If Sony wasn't dying in a mountain of its own filth rn and Xbox still existed, this would be a legendary trainwreck. The literal only reason it isn't is because the rest of the industry is in such a sorry state that Nintendo can get away with this.

The launch line-up isn't bad, but holy shit is it too niche to keep this thing afloat. I don't know anyone who would buy a Switch 2 with all those fucking asterisks for anything except a new Mario Kart, and something tells me that this new game isn't going to do enough for the general audience to convince loads to make the switch even with a bundle.

If the tech demo had been built-in and free, or if the upgrades had been free, or ESPECIALLY if both had been free, I could see this kind of working. As it is now, it's rather obvious that Nintendo is doing this because they can get away with it and they like money. I don't think it will end very well for them.

I do find it kind of hilarious that their competition has gotten so bad that Nintendo is now competing with PCs directly through the mouse feature. It's especially funny given that the mouse feature is almost certainly going to be a complete pain in the ass when the console is docked and a near non-option in handheld, so games like Crippleball I've forgotten the actual name and don't care enough to correct myself will basically only be playable in one mode, further limiting their appeal.

I might actually upgrade if only for that fucking cooler in the deck (it's really hot where I live so the poor console has constant overheating issues), as well as the fact that I barely bought anything on the original Switch so I will not be getting screwed over by 90% of these bad business decisions, but I highly doubt I'm going to be joined by anyone save for hardcores. What a stellar fuck-up. :story:
Click to expand...
Dude, the vast majority of that shit does not matter. Switch 1 had the paid tech demo. It had 2 new games but the big one was cross gen. It didn't have a camera ta all. It didn't have any voice chat at all. It not only didn't have NSO, it didn't have VC either so no way at all to play retro games. Teeny tiny third party selection since so many were burned by Wii U. Willing to be that GCN controllers actually will work on Switch 2 through the Wii U/Switch Smash portal thing. Also, thats literally every system ever except the Wii U using Wiimotes. And then a bunch of niche nerd talking points that nobody will notice or care about in two months.

I get that the presentation was jank ass shit and you want to bitch about it but nobody, and I mean nobody, actually bases their purchasing decisions on the presence or lack-thereof of UI themes or forced controller upgrades.
 
  • Feels
  • Dumb
  • Optimistic
Reactions: Nameless One, fartsnstuf, AnsemSoD1 and 4 others
Terror Sandwich said:
Modern Nintendo games look so fucking soulless, it's depressing.
The MK game is filled with soul-killing-gas and the DK game has such a generic artstyle it could have had Mario as the main character and nothing would have changed.
From Soft is one of the few dev keeping soul alive in the modern AAA industry, Duskbloods carried the show.
Click to expand...
Anyone who goes on about "soul" in games is a certifiable 4chin retard and jerks off to cartoon children.
 
  • Dumb
  • Mad at the Internet
  • Semper Fidelis
Reactions: Nameless One, Clarence Big Boss, AnsemSoD1 and 5 others
The Doom Slayer said:
>This is a PvPvE-based multiplayer action game in which up to 8 players battle each other and players battle their enemies. Players become the “Duskbloods,” who have gained powers beyond those of humans through the power of special blood, and find themselves in an epic battle for the “First Blood.

Yeah... I'll pass.
Click to expand...
Where did this come from?
 
whatever I feel like said:
Aaaand... we're fucked. Physical games are now 80 dollars.
Click to expand...
Maybe in Canada money, but nobody should be surprised about the big-box first party stuff being $70 on Switch 2 after Tears of the Kingdom.

1743605411114.png

Additionally:

L M A O
1743605354043.png

edit: nevermind what the fuck
1743605466421.png

i'm cackling over here this is insane

here's the official Switch 2 site if anyone wants to give this shit a deeper look, it is TOP-CLASS entertainment
 
  • Like
  • Informative
  • Feels
Reactions: Nameless One, Lone MacReady II, AnsemSoD1 and 5 others
Was very excited about this. Left very disappointed. It's not clear to me why backwards compatibility appears to be shakey (are they still not using the same ARM architecture?), and the "Upgrade Packs" without so much as a pricing structure listed is suspect, and no mention of fixing stick drift that has plagued every controller I have. Can't say I'm interested in paying for framerate unlocks, so this is probably a pass for me.
Edit: Oh right, paid voice chat. Go fuck yourself Nintendo.
 
  • Feels
  • Agree
  • Like
Reactions: Nameless One, The Fair Lady, Clarence Big Boss and 2 others
Not very good. Highlight was the 4 seconds where they labeled Silksong as coming in 2025... we'll see.

Donkey Kong game is interesting, but god do I not like the new direction... super annoyed they brought K. Rool to Smash to great hype and then just immediately dropped not only him again, but the entire surrounding Rare work to the point I'm worried they're gonna try to drop Diddy even. The de-Rare-ification of DK is something I feel is going to weaken the brand rather than "re-take" it for Nintendo.

Duskbloods looked cool, but reading here it's multiplayer had the same effect it did on everyone and significantly dropped my interest. They already have a multiplayer thing coming in Nightreign, why do another?

They didn't sell me on it. Also, if games truly are $80 like I've seen in this thread than I'm probably becoming an exclusive PC gaming pirate. Hopefully YuZu-TwoZu is not created by retards.
 
  • Feels
  • Like
  • Agree
Reactions: Nameless One, LifeAlert, Lone MacReady II and 2 others
Anonitolia said:
Maybe in Canada money, but nobody should be surprised about the big-box first party stuff being $70 on Switch 2 after Tears of the Kingdom.

View attachment 7167379

Additionally:

L M A O
View attachment 7167375

edit: nevermind what the fuck
View attachment 7167383

i'm cackling over here this is insane

here's the official Switch 2 site if anyone wants to give this shit a deeper look, it is CLASS entertainment
Click to expand...
See that askterisk? They're charging different prices for digital and physical now. Its 80 dollars physical, 70 dollars for the cuck "you will own nothing and be happy" digital version.
 
  • Lunacy
Reactions: Anonitolia
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back