Celebrity Meghan Markle / Rachel Meghan Markle / Meghan, Duchess of Sussex / Meghan Sussex / The Alliterate One - Markle Snarkle

[MongInTheMirror]

On the possible jewelry theft: god, the sheer brass neck of this bitch. I mean, obvious disclaimer that we can't know if it's true, but the audacity wouldn't surprise me at this point.

But this is what I meant in my first post on this thread, about the second-hand embarrassment she gives you being her most striking feature. I'm about as far from a monarchist as you'll get politically, but I'm still in awe at this thundercunt managing to snag the dupe - sorry, duke - of a lifetime, marrying from (more or less, who the fuck watched Suits?) obscurity into the British royal family, and then being fucking ghetto enough to start sneaking the family crockery/art/jewels into your knockoff Michael Kors tote you got at TJ Maxx. This is why this crazy bitch is such a great lolcow.



Like, I know the jewelry is cute and expensive and whatnot, but I'm embarrassed for her getting busted going full Winona Ryder at Buckingham palace, of all places. Jesus, Meghan, way to not reinforce stereotypes about black people. Or should we say 'archetypes'?

Also, a) is this bitch seriously retarded enough to have thought she could sell pilfered royal jewels on Mercari or something? and b) way to screw yourself out of ever wearing more impressive/ prestigious jewelry in the future, you profligate lot lizard. That's such short-sighted succubus work, we should award you some celebratory coke-bottle glasses à la Bubbles from Trailer Park Boys. You know, in honor of Trevor and Corey.

 

[Convallaria majalis]

I don’t know if this has been discussed yet, but I recall blinds from years ago saying she was banned from William and Catherine’s home after taking photos of Charlotte without their permission or knowledge. Apparently she was snooping around the house alone and went into Charlotte’s bedroom while she was asleep. Crazy bitch.

 

[Karen Horney]

Duchess of Sussex stole my bike

 

[nigel p poppycock]

Victoria Jackson? Huh.

Back in the day I used to hate watch Sandra Lee and then discuss her show on the TWoP forums. I didn't hate Sandra but her show was a trainwreck (and this is from someone who loathes cooking). It was always fun when cocktail time came along and she used enough alcohol to pickle six livers. Thing is, Sandra had an identity. She was the broad who made cooking easy and came up with "tablescapes" that were an assault on the senses. She never strayed from that during her tenure.

Meghan is a cypher. No identity, she'll be whatever she thinks will get her ahead in the moment, and then she's on to the next thing. Her product launch went exactly as I expected--confusion and probably some deception about the "sold out in an hour!" claim. I don't know who she's expecting is going to buy this stuff. It's not high end enough for big spenders, transparent enough for foodies/crunchies, or affordable for people pinching pennies. It's weird. Like everything else she tries to do.

The boxed crepe mix--like I said, I hate cooking and baking. I'm also not a foodie. While it might come across as lazy, any shortcut I can take that will reduce my time making and eating food, I'm here for, even if it's just a few seconds. Dumping a box mix and adding an egg and water is right up my alley. But I can get a cheaper mix at the store with the same ingredients and probably the same or even better taste, so why would I bother with Ever After or As Ever or whatever?

 

[RisingPhoenix]

She talked about all this in the “Diana tapes,” videos shot by her public speaking coach wherein she spills the beans on a LOT, including how “odd” her sex life with Charles was (he only wanted it once every three weeks). Bear in mind she made these confessions and it was only the second time they had ever met. The childhood part starts at 30 seconds in:

I would bet Meghan has studied these tapes extensively.

I feel more for Diana than I ever would for Meghan personally - though I recognise she certainly paid a part in her own agonies.

She was 19 when she got engaged to Charles. It was the first proper royal engagement in an age where the media had become a more overwhelming force. So she went overnight from being able to live a relatively normal (if rich) lifestyle, to being hounded all hours. I think that does something to a person, no matter what class you come from.

You have all of that going on. But also your fiancee keeps confiding in this "Camilla" person when he's overwhelmed, and on top of that he's getting kind of annoyed that his pretty bride to be is getting all the attention. I mean Meghan can boo-hoo, but at least it's unquestionable that Harry has always had her back. Diana didn't even have that.

Diana did realize before the wedding it was going to be a shitshow. But it was the night before the wedding and in confiding with a sister she realized walking away would cause massive scandal.

Was she a bit of a mental hot mess? Oh yeah. But I do believe Charles was an awful dick about the whole business - I'm not sure if many people would have endured the situation much better once they were locked into the same situation.

 

[obsdj]

Victoria Jackson? Huh.

Yeah, about that. I thought leftist Hollywood elites hated her. Yes she was on SNL but she’s pretty right wing, anti gay, etc. Why would someone like MM want to be tainted with that association? Is she that desperate for vaguely-familiar names to attach to?

TWoP forums

Um, 15/15?

(Hee.)

 

[Cheesegirl78]

Yeah, about that. I thought leftist Hollywood elites hated her. Yes she was on SNL but she’s pretty right wing, anti gay, etc. Why would someone like MM want to be tainted with that association? Is she that desperate for vaguely-familiar names to attach to?



Um, 15/15?

(Hee.)

Different Victoria Jackson.

 

[𝕺𝖑' 𝕯𝖎𝖗𝖙𝖞 𝕱𝖆𝖙𝖘𝖔]

 

[Cheesegirl78]

And the fact she spent more than six times what Catherine, the future Queen of England, for fucks sake, did on clothes in one year has my flabbers gasted.

Who marries into a family and has the nerve to spend close to half a million dollars on clothes, and sticks the bill with her FIL, the man who walked her down the aisle?

Sorry I'm MATI, just the rudeness of Meghan is gross.

 

[Adrenochrome Dreams]

But this is what I meant in my first post on this thread, about the second-hand embarrassment she gives you being her most striking feature. I'm about as far from a monarchist as you'll get politically, but I'm still in awe at this thundercunt managing to snag the dupe - sorry, duke - of a lifetime, marrying from (more or less, who the fuck watched Suits?) obscurity into the British royal family, and then being fucking ghetto enough to start sneaking the family crockery/art/jewels into your knockoff Michael Kors tote you got at TJ Maxx. This is why this crazy bitch is such a great lolcow.

She really, really fucked up an absolutely golden opportunity to be an actual princess.

All she had to do was listen to her advisors and she had fame, fortune, a permanent place in the history books and even public goodwill handed to her on a plate. But like all narcissists, she thought she knew best.

She seems to fuck up every opportunity with her pathological compulsion to always be front and centre. She never works for long enough to develop any substance because she has no genuine interests except transparent and inept social climbing.

Lady Colin Campbell was married to the younger son of a random Duke for nine months and she’s still dining out on it half a century later! This is how you do it: she has a brand and a niche and she’s stuck to it and built upon it. Megs just flits from one thing to another and tries on hat after hat in to see if anything sticks. She’s an empty vessel.

Imagine what a sensible person could have done with Meghan’s opportunity - especially as her race meant she could have been portrayed as modernising the royal family. The niche was right there waiting for her and she trashed it.

 

[John Andrews Stan]

So she went overnight from being able to live a relatively normal (if rich) lifestyle, to being hounded all hours.

Diana came from money buy she also had a degree of humility unusual in a born aristocrat. For example, she always worked from the time she left school, including as a cleaning lady. Meghan would never lower herself to get her hands dirty, especially with other people’s filth. I don’t think most middle class westerners in current year would, either.

 

[Fish and Chips]

Diana came from money buy she also had a degree of humility unusual in a born aristocrat. For example, she always worked from the time she left school, including as a cleaning lady. Meghan would never lower herself to get her hands dirty, especially with other people’s filth. I don’t think most middle class westerners in current year would, either.

Oh, she's gotten her hands very, very dirty...

 

[John Andrews Stan]

The Harkles’ PR strategy goes from bad to worse, as their friends are now telling media that the couple believe Dr. Sophie Chandauka was “obsessed with Meghan” in “a fangirl way.” (I would link to this Daily Mail piece, published less than an hour ago, but it appears to have been pulled from their site. I’ll link when it’s back.)

ETA: The article was only restored after 3AM Eastern. They yanked it for several hours, but I don’t see any material changes to it.



(Note Meghan’s back is turned completely to Sophie in the photo above.)



They also review Meghan’s jam, which they say is way too sweet and runny. It’s downright soupy (warning: the writer’s voice in the video is extremely grating).

 

[Eglantine]

Has anyone ever seen "As ever" as a sign-off in real life? I could see "Yours, as ever" or "Love, as ever" but without something to modify it just sort of sits there with no context.

For those wondering where As Ever came from, it's speculated it was Princess Diana's sign off but no proof has been found to my knowledge.

Interestingly, it seems it was a sign off for King Charles, because there is a handwritten letter on this website

https://everythingroyal.com/everythingroyalcorrespondence.html

See: Prince Charles handwritten letter

Item 2983- November 22, 1991 that ends with

"As ever, Charles"


And there are also another example here

https://archive.md/9uehK

I'll post some oldie but goodie Markle moments that haven't been posted yet:


Meghan Markle’s wild claim that her royal wedding was compared to the release of late anti-apartheid hero Nelson Mandela is being challenged by the only people it appears she could have been referring to.

https://nypost.com/2022/09/01/mystery-grows-over-meghan-markles-wild-mandela-comparison/

It looks like this guy plays air drums to desperately escape Meghan's touch.

https://youtu.be/8XfvJeiUed8?feature=shared

OP mentioned The Bench, her failed children's book

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Bench_(book)

It flopped and there's really not much more to write about, it was that boring, except that a blind item said Meghan bought most of them


And there was also supposed to be a Pearl TV show for young girls that Netflix cancelled

https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.bbc.com/news/business-61294978.amp

If you have eight minutes to waste this is cringe worthy: Meghan on Ellen's TV show

https://youtu.be/FOKEE67MexM?si=_tgBhsyh7epuY1pM

 

[Cheesegirl78]

Why does Meghan lie about things that are so easily proven wrong?

The Nelson Mandela story, claiming her and Harry were married three days before they actually were, claiming the BRF are racist, then backtracking on that?
I just don't understand it.

 

[John Andrews Stan]

There is an interesting effort post on the SaintMeghanMarkle subreddit pertaining to the financial records for Meghan, Harry, their Archewell Foundation, Sentebale and Invictus. According to the documents linked:

• Harry did not donate $1.5 million to Sentebale, as he has claimed
• Sentebale says they are awaiting $1.75 million in pledged funds
• Archewell Foundation made no disbursements to Sentebale or Invictus, despite Harry and Meghan profiting from them by e.g. shooting Netflix shows at the charities’ events, which were funded by the charities and run by their respective staffs

The abuse of non-profits is gross in the extreme and I really hope they haven’t been engaging in that to the degree it appears they have. “Everybody does it” isn’t true and wouldn’t be much of a defense anyway.

 

[nigel p poppycock]

Why does Meghan lie about things that are so easily proven wrong?

The Nelson Mandela story, claiming her and Harry were married three days before they actually were, claiming the BRF are racist, then backtracking on that?
I just don't understand it.

Paraphrasing Judge Judy here--when you lie all the time, your memory has to be perfect. But it can't be, so eventually you'll trip up and reveal the lie. Compulsive liars do this all the time.

The Bench was released in 2021, but I thought it was published last year too because that's when I heard of it and it seemed like it was a launch. But that's the other problem, as we see with her jam. For whatever reason the marketing isn't hitting. Random House is a major publisher with a marketing department so I don't get why they didn't push this hard (although I could hazard a guess). Plus the hardcover is 18.50 for a kids book. Too expensive for regular folks.

 

[Gorilla Tessellator II]

tbh, I really don't understand what is her business plan re: As Ever.
Let's say the product was good and she found 100K customers. That is highly unlikely, because I don't think that many gullible people exist, who are both gullible and have sufficient means to purchase overpriced products.

Anyway, how many jars of jam one buys per month? I don't buy many, and it's not like I am eating pancakes or whatever with jam daily.

I see that someone can buy it one time as a novelty, for "keepsake packaging" or whatever inane reason, but I don't see them buying it month after month.

DailyMail also called some "nutritionist" who claims that Meghan's spread is healthy. What?
Since when jam/spread is healthy to begin with given that half of it if not more is sugar. And also the spread contains organic sugar but not organic fruit. That's just ridiculous.

 

[Greedy Fly]

tbh, I really don't understand what is her business plan re: As Ever.

First, I don't think she has long term plans for anything, ever. Second, I think it's like all her other business forays: she wants the product to be herself, her brand, her story. She wants to create the narrative about herself that will once and for all make the world view her how she wants.

Then the waters get muddied because she has no stable identity or sense of self. The image she's trying to sell flickers rapidly through various social media trends, so you get this bizarre mix of high-end prices for cheap food, totes relatable billionaire, expert chef that can't cook. It's kind of like how we have younger, poorer lowcows who rebrand their tumblrs, gender, and DID headmates every few months except at a much more expensive scale.

 

[Iron Hamster]

Why does Meghan lie about things that are so easily proven wrong?

It's a standard lolcow trait.