Victor Markhoff / Ana Victoria Markhoff / vvictorman_uel - Powerchair faker pooner, has every illness, allergic to Krebs cycle, bed mayo enjoyer, kicked out of house and mental hospital, constant ebeggar, applesauce heiress paid to yeet her teets

[Diana Moon Glampers]

"High-libido asexual." Sure, Vicki. "You can't fire me, I quit...God, I'm so lonely..." is not a sexuality.

Somehow when Vicki shows up at a seder, everyone tugs their collar and says "uh, let's make this a short one, we all want to get out of here ASAP."



Passover is Vicki's favorite holiday because while other people have to suffer in order to satisfy religious commandments, her life remains unchanged. I'm not making that up, she actually says that. Then complains about the one tiny sacrifice she actually does have to make.

 

[Larry David's Opera Cape]

Passover is Vicki's favorite holiday because while other people have to suffer in order to satisfy religious commandments, her life remains unchanged. I'm not making that up, she actually says that. Then complains about the one tiny sacrifice she actually does have to make.

Being a lapsed Jew implies that at some point she was an observant or at least somewhat attentive Jew, and even a Jew at all.

Papers on the table, kid, who was on your bet din? I'll bet you all the almond flavor macaroons and jelly fruit slices on the kosher supermarket shelf that it never happened at all.

 

[Muskcarpone]

Quick reminder that she isn't Jewish and has never been Jewish, either. If any of her ancestors were involved in the holocaust, it would have been as perpetrator, not victims. I can't even make the old joke about her great-grandpa having died in Auschwitz because he got drunk on the watch tower and fell from it. Her family is so rich, her Nazi ancestors would never have been on something as common as watch duty.

 

[Cnaiur urs Skiotha]

"High-libido asexual." Sure, Vicki. "You can't fire me, I quit...God, I'm so lonely..." is not a sexuality.

View attachment 7186921

Somehow when Vicki shows up at a seder, everyone tugs their collar and says "uh, let's make this a short one, we all want to get out of here ASAP."

View attachment 7186962

Passover is Vicki's favorite holiday because while other people have to suffer in order to satisfy religious commandments, her life remains unchanged. I'm not making that up, she actually says that. Then complains about the one tiny sacrifice she actually does have to make.

View attachment 7186969

Vicki is a high-libido asexual, a gentile Jew, an able-bodied power chair user, a nonbinary man (female)… starting to sense a pattern here. If an identity seems fun to try on to a Twitter-brained adult child, then silly concerns like “you’re not the thing you claim to be” or “those two identities contradict each other” is just awful fascist gatekeeping. Words having meaningful definitions or groups having requirements to join is incompatible with Vicki’s desire to try on every hat at once.

 

[Diana Moon Glampers]

Vicki is a high-libido asexual, a gentile Jew, an able-bodied power chair user, a nonbinary man (female)… starting to sense a pattern here. If an identity seems fun to try on to a Twitter-brained adult child, then silly concerns like “you’re not the thing you claim to be” or “those two identities contradict each other” is just awful fascist gatekeeping. Words having meaningful definitions or groups having requirements to join is incompatible with Vicki’s desire to try on every hat at once.

This is the Joss Whedon school of character creation. "She's a tough-as-nails soldier, but also a loyal wife!" "She's a prostitute, but dignified and moral!" "She's a fragile, broken girl, but a KILLING MACHINE." "She's a blonde cheerleader but also the chosen one who slays vampires!" "She's a former vengeance demon, but lol so awkward!" "She's a talented engineer, but also a silly spaz!"

There's a certain type of girl who grew up on this style of character, saw that a certain nerdy class of people loved it and found it compelling, and then went to structure their entire existence and identity on "I'm a [this], but also (can you believe it?! DID I JUST BLOW YOUR MIND?!) a [that]!"

Vicki's a wheelchair user, but she's a kinky freak who hangs out on Grindr!

She's a kinky freak who hangs out on Grindr, but she's an asexual who just wants to make out!

She's a man, but pink bedazzles her respirator!

She's permanently disabled and unable to engage in personal care tasks, but she's a university student!

Come on, why are you not sooooo impressed by her transgressive internal contradictions?

 

[Muskcarpone]

Makes sense considering that she grew up as the WASPiest upper-class girl imaginable but she's also *record scratch" an impoverished Jewish poc man!

 

[a tightly clenched butt]

Victoria describes her poop in great detail to the internet:





Yikes.

She should try just pooping into a Ziploc bag. Very convenient to carry around, just toss it into your bag or put it in your pocket.

 

[Diana Moon Glampers]

Nauseating.

Vicki also tells us about the "work" she turns in to her NYU classes. Don't you know her run-on sentences and lack of any formal conventions is due to her ultra-fast Ferrari brain that simply doesn't have time for your retarded plebian grammar?



Vicki thinks she shouldn't have to edit anything. Her professors should receive total word vomit with the consistency of her not runny enough to pour/not solid enough to scoop shit.

Vicki: when professors ask for a first draft, they're not asking for your stream of consciousness that first pours forth from your Vyvanse dose. Even if it makes the page count requirement. They want you to take first passes at basic editing for coherence and cohesiveness. The "first draft" is the first draft where your professor gets to make comments and guide you. It doesn't mean you don't run basic grammar checks or capitalize your sentences, dummy.

Vicki still can't make it to classes. How long can she keep this grift running?



Vicki, who lives in absolute filth and rot, requires people to rinse their mouths out before kissing her sweet, supple, ever so desirable lips. This is totally a real thing that has really actually happened to Vicki and not just a problem she's making up about things she will never experience.



It looks like she stayed up past 5 AM and tweeted a bunch through the night.

I think she's not getting to class because her sleep schedule is now something like 6 AM - 3 PM.

 

[The Judean People's Front]

High-libido asexual

This, I've discovered, is code for "porn-broken brain." People who describe themselves like this, and nearly all my personal lolcows do, are into weird fetish shit like vore, transformation, being stepped on by giants, and, in Vicky's case, probably poop stuff. These are people who were given such unbridled access to Internet pornography at such young age that they have sex drives, but completely fucked attraction/desire where they need to cum but actual sex with another person is gross/unappealing to them.

"She's a tough-as-nails soldier, but also a loyal wife!" "She's a prostitute, but dignified and moral!" "She's a fragile, broken girl, but a KILLING MACHINE." "She's a blonde cheerleader but also the chosen one who slays vampires!" "She's a former vengeance demon, but lol so awkward!" "She's a talented engineer, but also a silly spaz!"

I'm fucking dead. The crew of Serenity with Buffy tossed in.

 

[a tightly clenched butt]

weird fetish shit like vore, transformation, being stepped on by giants, and,

Excuse me but actual giants or just very large women? In the first case it's a death by snu snu situation, kinda.

Update on the poo situation: Vicky is attending class via zoom, but still has to leave to go shit.



Can't she just attend sitting on the toilet? Just blur your background mute yourself at strategic times.

 

[The Judean People's Front]

actual giants

I'm so sorry to tell you this, but the giant/giantess fetish community is huge. No pun intended. They even have a convention, like furries, called SizeCon. This one overlaps with the vore stuff a lot. It's hilarious and revolting all at once.

Death by Sun Snu is definitely an element of some of it, but mostly they don't want to actually have the sex with giant women, just be eaten, stepped on, sat on, stuck in their asses and stinky shoes, and generally abused by giant people. Hence the whole "asexual" part of it. Sex doesn't really enter the chat.

Spoiler: My favorite personal Lolcow is a "giantess"

but I have like 4 degrees of separation from her in real life, so I can't share, unfortunately. But she and her "community" of giantess freaks are endless amusement until I get too grossed/weirded out

 

[Brackets]

For someone who mere days ago insisted that "it's embarrassing to divulge information publicly", this bitch sure tweets a lot about her bowel movements.

 

[Jupiter Doughnuts]

She might be prescribed LDN. I know it’s used to curb OCD issues and even other addictions so maybe it was part of a deal with her doctors/ parents given her history of drug abuse. I could also see her getting a script for it, but not taking it, to appear compliant for some psychiatrist. While she has other doctors, at another facility, dispensing opiates.

I've heard of LDN being used for BPD and self injury. I suspect it's being used in a "we tell you this is for pain but it's really for mental health and the placebo effect" in the same way SNRIs and some other psych meds are used. Easy way to tell someone that they're getting a super special pain med, but what you're really treating is their BPD.

 

[Fapcop]

Is the shit a fetish-LARP or do you reckon she has issues thanks to her shit diet?

 

[WhiteNiggasGardens]

View attachment 7189625

Forget the disgusting bullshit, the first image made me physically cringe much harder than her blabbering usually would. Her academia LARP is hilarious, differing from the many munchie pooners that are broke af and can't do anything; but the day she's actually booted out will be glorious. Can't miss more school? That's ableist! Why not just take a semester off for self care at this point?

 

[AfghanBlue]

Is the shit a fetish-LARP or do you reckon she has issues thanks to her shit diet?

She is a true bpd bullshit artist. Subconsciously, the best way to sell a lie is to really belive it yourself. In this case, the lie about mega bad bowel movements = why no college work has been done, issues with essays, attendance etc;
This is all character back story for herself, for the main, developing plot line for excusing her fuck up this academic year, being as there's been no bites on the other lines, from either the medics or the school.

In a way she kiiiiind of trully believes it herself. There's a tiny bit of her, the deep down narrator, that knows the real score, but that part of her is so tiny compared to the rest of the endless voices which constant streams of content is also even better at drowning out than the regular histrionic bullshit mental cavalcade.
Its method acting basically. She needs to belive too.

However, I reckon she won't actually get the takers this time. Idk if she believe she will herself, cos she has in the past , but she most likely won't this time around.

 

[Zemblan Physics]

Sure, Jan.

 

[Larry David's Opera Cape]

View attachment 7192666
Sure, Jan.

Dear kindly social worker
They tell me get a job
Like be a soda-jerker
Which means like be a slob
It's not I'm anti-social
I'm only anti-work
Gloryosky, that's why I'm a jerk!

 

[The Jewel of the Nile]

View attachment 7192666
Sure, Jan.

I hate to bust out the lefty lingo but seriously Vicky- check your privilege. You were raised in luxury and still coast on that safety net. All it would take is a slight attitude adjustment and your parents would take you back without blinking

 

[Fapcop]

I hate to bust out the lefty lingo but seriously Vicky- check your privilege. You were raised in luxury and still coast on that safety net. All it would take is a slight attitude adjustment and your parents would take you back without blinking

I don’t get this chick. Her future time orientation seems to max out at two weeks from now.

What is her long term plan? Why exactly is she in college? Surely not to get a job and career.

Go home Vicky. Get a job at a Starbucks for a year, and try to convince your parents to buy you your own little cafe that you can run, if you do well.

You can even turn it into a little, faggy gay coffee shop, since you like gay men so much. They have. Lot of money to spend on fancy coffee I keep hearing.