Nicholas Robert Rekieta / Rekieta "Law" / Actually Criminal / @NickRekieta - Polysubstance enthusiast, "Lawtuber" turned Dabbleverse streamer, swinger, "whitebread ass nigga", snuffs animals for fun, visits 🇯🇲 BBC resorts. Legally a cuckold who lost his license to practice law. Wife's bod worth $50. The normies even know.

[Vibralldo]

POV: you just told your dad that you don't want to do cocaine anymore

 

[Sneed Force One]

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POV: you just told your dad that you don't want to do cocaine anymore

POV: You are witnessing parentification of the eldest child

This image/content was generated using artificial intelligence. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

 

[The Wokest]

POV: You are witnessing parentification of the eldest child
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the younger ones are all happy because they're the only ones in the house that can still do coke

 

[Balldo's Gate]

Totally fair and justified. I'd love to see what the PSI says. I would love to see that be Nick's sentence.

If I am being pessimistic, I would bet that the judge chooses some middle ground towards the prosecution and gives like 3 years probation with no jail time.

I wonder how terribly Rekieta presented himself for that to be the recommendation. It's not just that he appears to have been recommended the maximum possible probation length, but that recommendation is PLUS jail and PLUS community service.

The letters do seem to imply total delusion on the part of Rekieta and his family. Unless I missed it, the letter from Megan is the only one that references addiction issues at all. Kayla refers to "a mistake" and Bob refers to "their personal situation". Kayla also appears to imply that the PSIR was biased for political reasons.



Also, since they reference all the great things Rekieta does for his friends/family/community, why are there only 3 letters?

 

[Rodeo Roadrunner]

Just collecting some interesting tidbits from the letters to the court from Robert and Kayla.
From Kayla's letter:

"11PM dinner requests" from their eldest son seems strange to me. I don't think I ever asked my parents to make me food that late at night, much less asked them to make me food at all when I was 17. If I was up that late I would either make something myself, or more likely be eating out with friends if I was out that late. Also "skills and creativiry in his dishes" is hilarious to me, not that Nick's cooking is unedible, but I would call it barely competent at best. Certainly not "creative". Perhaps it is creative to use Wagyu beef in a roast where it is totally wasted?

From Robert's letter:

Unfortunate confirmation that the older boys are small for their age. I don't want to put the blame solely on Nick for this, as genetics can manifest in strange ways, but to me this just reeks of underfed and malnutrition.

Oh no, Nick had to drive twice a week to go to classes to get a law degree? How horrible, no one in history has suffered more than...driving twice a week.

Nick payed for the in-laws to have vacations apparently.

Honestly, there is a lot of talk about cooking food, and especially driving. I don't see a lot of talk about HAVING A JOB. There isn't anything in there claiming that if Nick were to go to jail for 30 days, that they would suffer loss of income that would be hard Kayla the stay-at-home mom. Nothing about how his professional career would be harmed, nothing about how his professional relationships and business conduct is an example to others in his profession. Because the reality is, Nick doesn't have a job, has no desire to have a real job, and all the talk about money donated, how generous they are, isn't from Nick being a great coworker or great at his profession. It is all due to his trust fund and parent's money. Nothing that Nick himself earned or did.

I think that instead of forced community service, the Judge should order Nick to get a real job working at a burger joint for 90 days. That way he can REALLY pretend to be Kevin Spacey in 'American Beauty'. Nick working a real job, 9-5, 40 hours a week for 90 days would hurt him more than 30 days in jail or 5 years probation.

EDIT:

Also, since they reference all the great things Rekieta does for his friends/family/community, why are there only 3 letters?

Fantastic point and one I didn't think of. If Nick is so great and does all these things for his in-laws, church, and local homeschool/co-op, why did none of them send in letters? Could it be that, maybe, Nick isn't this great paragon generosity and morality, but has just thrown his mommy's money around in an attempt to buy friends and influence?

 

[Captain Manning]

You know, I have to say, it is really quite sad the only letters of support he could get were from his dad, his wife, and Megan goddamned Fox.

And I agree with those that say the first two might have even been ghostwritten by Nick himself.

If this were 2019 Nick (that is to say, what people thought at the time to be the real Nick), and the circumstances weren't this, I think he would have gotten way more.

Like if it were 2019 Nick, and the coke was done away from the kids, people might have just seen it as just an addiction problem, been thankful for his support of Vic, and would have gladly asked for leniency.

Hell, *I* might have written him a letter of support, along with a few other people on the Farms.

This is what happens when you turn into an irredeemable piece of shit.

Nick Rekieta: "...so this fucking ASSHOLE called Aaron Imholte drugged MY kids! Abused MY wife! and ate MY goo! But I sure GOT him! I took his wife and made her pussy BLEED hahaha!"
Victimised Inmate: "Dios mío, ya me lo has dicho cientos de veces! ¡Sal de mi celda antes de que te apuñale!"
Nick Rekieta: "What? I don't understand?...let's start from the beginning...there was my fucking JUDAS nanny, this guy called John and another one called AnimeSucksCopeAndSneed..."
Victimised Inmate: "...Por favor, que termine..."
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POV: you're getting another lecture about being driven 'everywhere' at the breakfast table after being curious what happened to the door under the sink.

Why are the raccoons silent, daddy?


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POV: you just told your dad that you don't want to do cocaine anymore

I really love you guys in this thread sometimes.

 

[daffodils]

Despite bad PSI news, Nick hasn't lost that special Rekieta humor



He still can't admit Kayla posed for the Toe

 

[Sneed Force One]

I wonder how terribly Rekieta presented himself for that to be the recommendation. It's not just that he appears to have been recommended the maximum possible probation length, but that recommendation is PLUS jail and PLUS community service.

The letters do seem to imply total delusion on the part of Rekieta and his family. Unless I missed it, the letter from Megan is the only one that references addiction issues at all. Kayla refers to "a mistake" and Bob refers to "their personal situation". Kayla also appears to imply that the PSIR was biased for political reasons.

View attachment 7230476

Also, since they reference all the great things Rekieta does for his friends/family/community, why are there only 3 letters?

I am utterly convinced Nick ghost-written this. I cannot envision the female mind willingly forgo an emotional appeal for a "muh freedums" angle. In what fucking world would a person's wife feel the need to include her husband's internet crusade against the commies for a crime completely unrelated to said crusade? It defeats even the woman standard of logic.

 

[Not Really Here]

Bro there's no way 50% of her character reference is about all the fucking extracurricular activities their kids take. You could be ferrying them back and forth from MENSA meetings, NO ONE CARES, YOU'RE STRUNG-OUT DRUG ADDICTS.

"Yah honah, I needs this addict to drive 5 kids around!"

Addict brain thinks a good argument is reminding the judge, that Nick has probably endangered his own children via DUI repeatedly.

 

[Ohhamburgers]

Failed lawtubers SEETHING.

 

[Strix454]

If Nick doesn’t get sentenced to any jail time I hope he tries to fight the judge, his lawyers or even a police officer in the court room otherwise he’s going to miss out on his chance of becoming lolcow of the year.

Some inspiration for Nick:

 

[Vibralldo]

Kayla refers to "a mistake"

Mistake means that you wouldn't immediately do it again

 

[Not Really Here]

Failed lawtubers SEETHING.

Where? Don't be a bogart, post seethe.

 

[Sneed Force One]

Nick Rekieta: "But your honor, this is a victimless crime! I plead to remove the child neglect charges! It never happened! Cocaine is just a substance, it never hurt anyone! I love it!"
Judge: "Mr. Rekieta, your gonna meet Bubba, and I'm telling him to slap the soap outta your hand"

I wonder how Fatrick MAPton is going to take this one. What exceptional mental gymnastics will take place where the Hunchback of Las Vegas will contort an idea where Aaron paying $50 for Kayla's tits is somehow worse than a jailcell.

At what point does Patrick realise?

 

[Bowl of Ramen]

“80 hours of servicing bulls? Don’t have to ask me twice, Yah Honnah!”

 

[not william stenchever]

Bet he shows up to court faced.

-faced, even.

 

[Schpoots]

But if I go to prison, who will drive all these GOD DAMNED kids to events that I signed them up for???!

 

[CoomerTine]

He’s not going to jail unless he violates probation

Anyone with a brain knew this was the outcome

 

[Midnight Energy Drink]

POV: You are witnessing parentification of the eldest child
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Don't forget the classic.

Can't quote (REEE):
- yeah, great idea to cry about your driving to the law school to the local judge who probably knows how easy you had
- How fucking seething you have to be at your wife's family to whine about you paying for their vacation? Who cares?

 

[Balldo's Gate]

From the Barneswalker's filing, White appears to have messed up altering the pronouns in his quote. It seems Rekieta took personal credit for his audience donating more than $1,000,000 to charity, an argument which doesn't appear to have helped the recommendation at all.