Grace Lavery / Joseph Lavery & Daniel M. Lavery / Mallory Ortberg - "Straight with extra steps" couple trooning out to avoid "dwindling into mere heterosexuality"

[Law]

In actual fact, Mama, Dada, and Lala routinely and publicly gender Rocco - even with the choice of name. The baby is a he, a him, a boy, a little man, a son.

When gender people become parents they never practice what they post.

 

[mold]

Mallory is a bad person but an extremely talented writer (who mostly writes bad things now, yes, but the raw talent is still there) and if she had decided to be bad in a different direction wow the book she could have written there

the tension in this situation - someone raised in our culture's actual religious expression, the megachurch, who sought refuge from her narcissistic show biz pastor family in 20th century English literature - which is full of people wrestling with the Catholic Church. Your escape leads you right back around but now you're Alice looking through the door at the garden you can never, ever get into.

Mallory take this and write it - the protagonist is a desperate social climber, so desperate that she mistakes a random ugly Oxonian for her ticket to Brideshead and tries to sell her family for clout in the most embarrassing and socially destructive of fail ways.

but what our unreliable narrator misses is that that family is itself a rich source of fiction - make them different from your real family, make them be doing real crimes and make them modern day Medicis. Make it obvious to the reader but the protagonist can't see it because she is always chasing the dream of the bloody English. what isn't hers, what can never be hers, is the only thing that is valuable.

but ha ha you'll never write anything good! because you can't get away from your marriage! because those two have you enslaved because if you leave you lose access to the baby!

 

[Larry David's Opera Cape]

Mallory is a bad person but an extremely talented writer (who mostly writes bad things now, yes, but the raw talent is still there) and if she had decided to be bad in a different direction wow the book she could have written there

the tension in this situation - someone raised in our culture's actual religious expression, the megachurch, who sought refuge from her narcissistic show biz pastor family in 20th century English literature - which is full of people wrestling with the Catholic Church. Your escape leads you right back around but now you're Alice looking through the door at the garden you can never, ever get into.

Mallory take this and write it - the protagonist is a desperate social climber, so desperate that she mistakes a random ugly Oxonian for her ticket to Brideshead and tries to sell her family for clout in the most embarrassing and socially destructive of fail ways.

but what our unreliable narrator misses is that that family is itself a rich source of fiction - make them different from your real family, make them be doing real crimes and make them modern day Medicis. Make it obvious to the reader but the protagonist can't see it because she is always chasing the dream of the bloody English. what isn't hers, what can never be hers, is the only thing that is valuable.

but ha ha you'll never write anything good! because you can't get away from your marriage! because those two have you enslaved because if you leave you lose access to the baby!

nigga what

 

[Law]

Has anyone said anything about the lack of trans representation at the Beidermeier Women's Hotel? I know it takes place in hazy and timeless 1963, but trans people have always existed, so what gives, Daniel?

 

[Stupid Sexy Flanders]

Has anyone said anything about the lack of trans representation at the Beidermeier Women's Hotel? I know it takes place in hazy and timeless 1963, but trans people have always existed, so what gives, Daniel?

Hey, you had Christine Jorgensen doing the rounds back then, so she really has no excuse for not featuring a true and honest woman.

 

[Anasa Tristis]

Mallory is a bad person but an extremely talented writer (who mostly writes bad things now, yes, but the raw talent is still there) and if she had decided to be bad in a different direction wow the book she could have written there

Mal has had many years of "professional" writing to polish up that "raw talent". If she hasn't figured out how to write properly and effectively by now (and clearly she has not with her mile long sentences and other crimes against grammar) she ain't gonna.

 

[mold]

Hey, you had Christine Jorgensen doing the rounds back then, so she really has no excuse for not featuring a true and honest woman.

and April Ashley

 

[Stupid Sexy Flanders]

Mal has had many years of "professional" writing to polish up that "raw talent". If she hasn't figured out how to write properly and effectively by now (and clearly she has not with her mile long sentences and other crimes against grammar) she ain't gonna.

Mal was basically one of the dozen of "quirky neurotic girl" writers at the time. She got lucky to get a backer and funding with Nicole, but she is in no way better than most of those other quirky neurotic girls with LiveJournals. Could Mal have gotten better? Yes, but she's lazy and got used to the easy ride. Now she's nearing 40 with an style that is outdated and annoying. And on top of that she's picked up some of Joe's worst quirks.

 

[Bookwork]

Now she's nearing 40 with an style that is outdated and annoying. And on top of that she's picked up some of Joe's worst quirks.

They both strike me as writers who write to admire themselves Writing.

There's no self-inquiry or honest exploration, just Little Britain's Emily Howard sitting at a writing desk with a quill pen and a scroll warbling at her antique mirror, "I'm a Writer who's Writing!"

But they do get published.

Wonders never cease.

 

[Constellationzero]

but an extremely talented writer

Umm...

NO.

Mallory Ortberg CANNOT write. She shouldn't even be given a contract to write up pieces about the local flea market in the Thrifty Nickel.

 

[mold]

Joe can't write. Mallory is a good writer who has been allowed to sit on her laurels, and won't submit to editing (too busy submitting to having a fist shoved in her mouth) (actually she probably just dreams of that happening now it's unlikely she has any sexual interactions whatsoever anymore). The Toast was twee and usually not to my taste but she was an extremely competent comedy writer.

that's the entire reason Joe took her out, he destroyed her *because* she has talent. Lily is allowed to continue having a career because she doesn't.

 

[MirnaMinkoff]

She got lucky to get a backer and funding with Nicole

I think most people overlook Nicole as one of the main reasons adult Mal is so maladjusted and bizarre. Nicole is a textbook BPD woman, but Mallory’s entire post-college adulthood revolved around pleasing and cultivating her friendship with Nicole. Nicole’s husband’s money ensured Mallory had a writing career that paid enough for her live in SF in her 20’s, no small feat.

Having to be besties with your nutty boss would exact a heavy mental toll. Nicole primed Mallory well to have a spouse like Joe, but he lacks hedge fund money which is a big problem with his tastes and lifestyle aspirations.

Nicole even funded Mallory and Joe’s dumb, expensive move to Brooklyn but that seemed to be a final gesture before a big break. Something happened, the connection (and money faucet was permanently) was severed. I’d guess Joe getting Mallory to hit up Nicole for “emergency move money” was the final straw but they gave it to her.

On some level I believe Mallory was in love with Nicole, but was never going to overcome the rich husband and kids thing. It’s ironic that when she finally got a Mr Narc Personality Disorder all to herself he promptly got a new girlfriend and had a baby with her. Mallory just can’t win.

I’m deadly curious what’s become of Nicole and if Steve had to have her go for some long expensive inpatient treatment.

I think Mallory and The Toast were stabilizing influences on Nicole’s new Utah mommy life, which is why her husband funded them. He moved her out of NYC to start a family, so paying for her to be a literary girl boss with a friend probably seemed like a small financial sacrifice to keep her content. I’ve wondered if Mallory trooning out, or starting down that path, made Steve close up the purse and think funding his wife’s BFF was now a bad investment. The Toast closed in 2016 and Mallory was doing the press rounds announcing she was transgender less than two years later.

Nicole’s last year on SM was absolutely batshit and she was obviously delusional and manic. So while I throw around BPD label about her, I do think she might be bipolar or have some other not-just personality disorder issues. Why not both?

It doesn’t seem unlinking with Mallory helped slow Nicole’s crazy train careening down the tracks. In fact she seemed to double down by hooking up with that fat Buffalo Bill creature. (Steve probably reconsidered putting the tard baby back on the payroll after that fiasco, but I could see Nicole getting the divorce or psychiatric inpatient choice after that shit…oh and a total ban on social media for good measure.)

 

[Law]

Hey, you had Christine Jorgensen doing the rounds back then, so she really has no excuse for not featuring a true and honest woman.

Why isn't Mal obsessed with Gore Vidal? He's literary, he's lefty, he's bisexual, he wrote Myra Breckenridge? He seems like the kind of author Mal and Joe would reference all the time.

The Toast was twee and usually not to my taste but she was an extremely competent comedy writer.

The Anaïs Nin earrings bit got a guffaw from me.

Nicole is a textbook BPD woman, but Mallory’s entire post-college adulthood revolved around pleasing and cultivating her friendship with Nicole.

I was a BPD-er's "favorite person" when I was like 15-22, and it can mess you up. She's the reason I'm a part of this fine website, God bless her and her nutty taste in Internet sideshows.

Having to be besties with your nutty boss would exact a heavy mental toll.

There's a reason The Devil Wears Prada works so well.

On some level I believe Mallory was in love with Nicole, but was never going to overcome the rich husband and kids thing. It’s ironic that when she finally got a Mr Narc Personality Disorder all to herself he promptly got a new girlfriend and had a baby with her. Mallory just can’t win.

I agree that she was in love with Nicole, and it must really suck to see your "one who got away" profess her love for a turdsack like Gretchen "vomit emoji" Felcher-Martin. Mallory could've won if she cut ties with Nicole, got some therapy to untangle the Gordian knot of her childhood, then settled down as a normal lesbian. Joe wanting to "Yoko" her destroyed all hope of normalcy.

 

[Stupid Sexy Flanders]

I think most people overlook Nicole as one of the main reasons adult Mal is so maladjusted and bizarre.

Absolutely. Without Nicole's backing, Mallory would've either had to up her ante beyond "quirky LiveJournal girl" or have just moved on to something else (the latter more likely). But with Nicole, Mallory got a well-funded LiveJournal and fans, which means she never thought she'd have to move on from that. And it's becoming apparent that she's stunted like a lot of other lolcows - maybe not as bad as Luna Slater's uninspiring "art", but she's on that scale rather than actually being talented.

Mallory could've won if she cut ties with Nicole, got some therapy to untangle the Gordian knot of her childhood, then settled down as a normal lesbian.

Mallory isn't a lesbian. She probably wants to be but... she's not. She probably couldn't even do the "college lesbian" arc that Lily did. If anything, I suspect she looked for a stricter mother in Nicole as her parents seems kind of lax. Then it spun out to Joe.
Again, any KiwiParents out there - it's okay to be square sometimes and put down the rules.

 

[Larry David's Opera Cape]

On some level I believe Mallory was in love with Nicole, but was never going to overcome the rich husband and kids thing. It’s ironic that when she finally got a Mr Narc Personality Disorder all to herself he promptly got a new girlfriend and had a baby with her. Mallory just can’t win.

I’m deadly curious what’s become of Nicole and if Steve had to have her go for some long expensive inpatient treatment.

I think Mallory and The Toast were stabilizing influences on Nicole’s new Utah mommy life, which is why her husband funded them. He moved her out of NYC to start a family, so paying for her to be a literary girl boss with a friend probably seemed like a small financial sacrifice to keep her content.

Damn even the Bloomsbury Group got a shitty tranny reboot version.

 

[sarna]

Why isn't Mal obsessed with Gore Vidal?

Too white, too male, too cis, too problematic on account of the Roman Polanski remarks. Also probably just way over her head.

 

[MirnaMinkoff]

Mallory isn't a lesbian. She probably wants to be but... she's not. She probably couldn't even do the "college lesbian" arc that Lily did. If anything, I suspect she looked for a stricter mother in Nicole as her parents seems kind of lax. Then it spun out to Joe.
Again, any KiwiParents out there - it's okay to be square sometimes and put down the rules.

Oddly I’m not sure what sexual orientation Mallory is and I don’t think she does either, but maybe she’s just calls herself pansexual or queer now.

I think Mallory was uncomfortable with male sexuality and might have been unhappy with the male attention she did, or did not, get in high school and college. I think she was far more comfortable around women and gay men. She probably didn’t fare well with heterosexual dating.

She also seemed to really seethe and resent male patriarchy which is understandable given she was raised within an evangelical bubble. But tbf everyone is annoying and cloying in the evangelical bubble, it’s not just a men issue, it’s the entire habitat. Mallory didn’t even get the worst of it by a long shot, as far as evangelicals go she was on the most liberal, academic end of the spectrum. Rev Ortberg’s brand of evangelical Christianity is a huge outlier to the more common and popular Texas mega church and Joel Olsteen evangelical brand.

In fact it shocked me a bit that Ortberg was even under that umbrella, but I guess you tailor your style to the flock you serve.

 

[Stupid Sexy Flanders]

Oddly I’m not sure what sexual orientation Mallory is and I don’t think she is either, but maybe she’s just calls herself pansexual now.

Mal is 110% heterosexual. She could've been drowning in pussy by now if she wasn't.

However, she is a woman who is uncomfortable around male sexuality because of various reasons, so she's making a lot of bad decisions. Add parental issues and a manipulative socio like Joe... Mal will die alone and the Kiwifarms will go "ha ha bitch u deserve it".

 

[FarmVille]

This is why the troons will lose. Joe posts paragraph after paragraph of word diarrhea—all the terfs gotta do is post


TINY TIM THINKS HE’S A LASS!!!!!!

and we’ve won

 

[MirnaMinkoff]

Mal is 110% heterosexual. She could've been drowning in pussy by now if she wasn't.

However, she is a woman who is uncomfortable around male sexuality because of various reasons, so she's making a lot of bad decisions. Add parental issues and a manipulative socio like Joe... Mal will die alone and the Kiwifarms will go "ha ha bitch u deserve it".

You do have an interesting point. I think Mallory could attract much higher quality female partners, than she could male partners. Her career and fanbase alone would have given her access to many attractive smart lesbians, but not so much quality heterosexual men.

I think there was even public acknowledgment of a girlfriend or two over the years but never a male partner until Joe.

Mallory’s daddy issues are also on level of magnitude rarely seen. If she couldnt find a husband like dad, I guess she’d settle for his polar opposite? Also her crazy daddy hate and issues only seemed to arise post-Joe. She seemed to have a perfectly nice, loving relationship with her father, at least from her public writings. Only after Joe did we get the “I hate dad” public person and numerous tattoos.